"What time izzit?"
A heavy sigh preceded the response. "Does it matter?"
A return sigh was provided in response, followed by the sound of movement, and then, "I guess not."
"What are you doing?"
"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm getting up," came the snippy retort.
"I'm the one with the concussion and even I can remember that YOU CAN'T SEE IN HERE!" Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard replied with irritation. "Let me help you," he said as he made to get up himself. "Why do you need to get up, anyway? You're hurt. You should just sit tight."
"I have to pee."
"Oh," Sheppard said as he helped pull Dr. Rodney McKay into a standing position – a not very steady standing position, but then again, Sheppard was tipping back and forth like a buoy in the bay AFTER a motorboat had speeded on by. "That's unfortunate."
Their situation wasn't really conducive to the setting up of 'facilities'. They were holed up in a shallow cave, a blizzard working feverishly to block them in. They had been attacked, all four members of the team, by locals with rocks and stones and bows and arrows. The attack was sudden and brutal and happened during a bad snow storm that had grown progressively worse into the now blizzard conditions. The frightened natives hadn't known what to make of the strangers, though it had been fairly obvious from their reactions that strangers had historically meant bad things to them, at least based on the severity of the assault.
In their efforts to escape, mostly Rodney's efforts as John had been knocked out cold by a well-aimed and very hard rock, the two had slipped and tumbled down a hill; the fall had caused Rodney's injuries. Their attackers had seemingly decided that nature and the weather would do just fine to finish the job they had started, and left the two men. There was little doubt that they had found their way back to warm and dry surroundings. Sheppard and McKay could only hope that Ronon and Teyla had fared better in their efforts to flee the mob, and that they'd been able to take note of the spot that the pilot and the scientist had fallen.
"Yeah, well, I guess we should be grateful that our bodies still want to perform their normal bodily functions," Rodney answered miserably as he limped toward the snow-enshrouded cave opening. He held his left wrist up against his torso with his right hand.
"You sure you can manage okay?" John asked as he walked in the same direction, not wanting his teammate too far out of his sights, 'sights' being ambitious phrasing in light of the dark of the cave.
"I don't know." McKay made it to the spot he had targeted, the right hand corner where the wall of snow met up with the wall of the cave. Sheppard could hear grunting and sighing as Rodney tried to undo his pants one-handed. The fact that his one good hand was freezing and less than nimble had to have added to his frustrations.
"Rodney, let me do that, or rather, undo that for you," John offered.
"No! I'll get it," McKay snapped back testily.
"By the time you get your dick out, we'll both be frozen in place, and wouldn't that be a picture for Teyla and Ronon to find." John now stood next to Rodney. "Come on, so we can get back under the blanket?"
Sheppard heard a frustrated 'hnh' followed by, "This sucks." McKay turned to face his team leader and waited for assistance.
"Yes it does." In the near pitch dark, John found Rodney's waist and then felt his way to the fly. He quickly undid the BDUs and then said, "You're all set."
"Thanks," Rodney said softly. The scientist leaned against the cave wall, needing it for balance with the sprained ankle and the sprained wrist. A little more grunting as McKay reached in, and then the sounds of relief were echoing through their temporary shelter, both the sounds of a wet stream being stifled in the snow and the sighs of relief not the least bit stifled coming from the physicist's mouth.
McKay turned back toward the area where they'd made their lair and walked, on his second step, right into Sheppard.
"Ow," Rodney said, holding his bad hand protectively.
"Sorry. Let's do you up and then get cozy again." They were both shivering now despite having been out from under the blankets for just a few minutes.
"O…Okay," Rodney said, his teeth chattering.
"Let's switch positions," Sheppard suggested. It was too dark in the cave to really see any reaction, but John need only imagine the look on Rodney's face when he said suspiciously, "What do you mean?"
"I'm not lookin' to molest you, McKay. I think your left hand should be between us, try to keep it warm."
"Oh. Okay." They made themselves comfortable cocooned in their emergency blankets, their packs cushioning their backs as best they could. It was daylight, but the snow was doing a pretty effective job of darkening their shelter as though is was nighttime. There was no way for anything to get in that might threaten their safety; the heavy snow and the bitter cold, and the eventual dwindling of oxygen were all threatening enough.
"We can't last long like this," Rodney said quietly. "I mean, the human body…" John stopped that train of thought.
"I know what you meant. Stop thinking like that. We'll get out. Teyla and Ronon…"
"Teyla and Ronon could be dead for all we know," McKay challenged. Though Sheppard knew it was a possibility, he also knew for sure…he sensed that it wasn't so. He was going to stick to that belief until he had evidence that proved otherwise.
"They're okay," the colonel assured.
"How do y…you know that?"
"I just do, Rodney."
"Fine."
"Hey, look. Let's think about something else. You know, maybe think about something that would make us feel warmer."
"Clear blue skies?" Rodney asked, a worried tone to his voice.
"Yeah, that's the idea. I'm thinking of hot chocolate," John said, offering up the first suggestion.
"That's very enlightened of you," Rodney responded, "though a hot cup of coffee would do wonders for me right now."
"See?"
"No, not really. How's your head, by the way?"
"Hurts. And I think it's just as well that it's so dark in here. Things still feel like they're moving a little."
"You got hit pretty hard," McKay noted.
"Yeah, well my back's a little sore, and that's all about your sharp elbow," John said, sounding accusatory.
"Yes, and your back is what shoved my wrist in a direction nature never intended for it to go," Rodney shot back.
Sheppard sat quietly for a few moments and then said, "Let's get back to meditating."
"Right." Rodney paused and then added, "A shot of Carson's single malt would work."
"Ick. Not today."
"Oh. Sorry."
"Nah, it's okay. How about a beach in Maui?"
"Or…" Rodney started, but uncontrollable shivers overtook him and, momentarily, his ability to speak. John scooted closer, hoping that shared body heat would start to work in their favor once again. Sheppard put his arm around McKay's shoulder, trying to warm his friend up.
"Nnnh…no," Rodney said, shoving with both shoulders to move John's arm, and knocking his sprained and badly swollen wrist.
"What?" John asked. "We should get closer, for warmth."
"No," McKay replied firmly. "Ouch."
"Don't be stupid, McKay." John put his arm back where he'd planned. But Rodney was nothing if not persistent about wanting things his way. The scientist used both his good and his bad hand to push the colonel away, causing himself more pain.
"I don't want…" Rodney started to explain, but he hissed as he rocked through the pain he'd caused.
"I really don't care what you want right now," John replied angrily. He didn't think this was delirium from hypothermia – they hadn't been stuck in the cold that long. But the best way to prevent it from actually happening was to get closer. "We need to use each other's body heat. It's too cold to fuck around about this!" He hadn't meant to get so angry, but he needed to get McKay to understand the severity of their situation. He grabbed McKay's hands and pushed them down to the physicist's lap.
And that's when he felt what Rodney had been flailing about to try to hide.
"Fuck," Rodney said. John removed his hands and sat in silence, momentarily stunned by what he'd felt. "I…I…" McKay started again, but it was painfully obvious that no matter what the genius had to say, it probably wasn't going to help matters.
Johns scooted up close to Rodney once again and said, "Don't worry about that."
"Don't w…worry about it? I'll be honest w…with you, Sh…Sheppard, I'm p…pretty worried," Rodney replied through his shivering and his hesitant and what seemed to be nearly hyperventilating breaths.
"Rodney, breathe. Please? And come here. I'm freezing my ass off. And other important body parts."
"It's fucking cold," Rodney agreed.
"Yes it is, which is why we have to help each other out."
"Sorry," McKay said sadly.
"You should be. If my dick b…breaks off because it's frozen s…solid, I'm blaming you." The joke was apparently not funny to the scientist. No answer at all back from the freezing Canadian was even more worrisome. "You don't seem to be having quite the same problem."
"Nnnnh-hnn," finally came the response from McKay, pretty near a sob.
"It's a joke, Rodney," John said, pulling his teammate in for a hug. "I'm telling you it's okay."
"How could it be okay?" Rodney asked despondently.
"Well, because we all get boners sometimes, sometimes at the strangest, most inopportune times. They're not always about sex. Adrenaline, other excitement."
McKay answered quietly, "This one is."
"What?" Sheppard asked. His cave-dwelling partner had spoken so quietly. It was strange, because he hadn't had any trouble understanding his friend up until this point.
"I think this one is…about sex."
"Really?"
"Well, maybe not sex," Rodney tried to explain. John could feel Rodney's face close to his, the breath from speaking immediately chilled as it blew against his cheek. They were very close, trying to re-circulate their limited remaining body heat. "But it is about attraction. I…I'm sorry. I n…never w…w…wanted you to know."
John squeezed Rodney tighter and rubbed his friend's arms, trying to keep the circulation going. He really didn't know what to say. It was quite a shock, hearing McKay admit what he did. It was both shocking and annoying, considering his own avid suppression of his feelings for McKay these last couple of years. Rodney had at times made it easy for the colonel to keep his distance. Arcturus had been a giant bucket of cold water, an easy and needed excuse to ignore the man and almost forget about those feelings. But too many good things, at least in regard to their relationship, had happened lately. It had still been easier not to go there, being in the military and being busy fighting for their survival and also thinking that Rodney and Katie Brown were really together – these things had all combined to help John Sheppard keep his denial in check. It had made it easy, somewhat, to forget about his feelings for Rodney McKay. Or at least keep them on the back burner.
But this? This was new, and worth the danger of pursuing.
"So, you're attracted to me?"
Rodney groaned and seemed to try to hide his head into John's shoulder. John had to admit that he liked the way that felt.
"Am I blind?"
Sheppard grinned. "Well, no. I thought you and Katie…"
"Katie is a nice person who treats me nicely. I like her."
"She's very sweet," John agreed.
"But I don't feel…that way about her. I wish I didn't feel that way about you," Rodney admitted.
"Well, I'm sure it's a little awkward for you right now."
"You think?" McKay asked with a large dollop of sarcasm.
"Cool your jets, McKay," the colonel ordered. "What if I told you I was attracted to you, too?"
"I'd say that you are a charming idiot who was just going a little overboard trying to make me feel better."
"Well, gee, thanks for that."
"No, seriously, I appreciate the effort, and the fact that it seems that you aren't inclined to let this incident affect our relationship negatively, though I admit to finding you even more attractive because of your efforts."
"Rodney," John said, pulling the scientist's face in his direction, making sure that, though they could barely make out faces in the darkness, the physicist at least knew that the colonel wanted to look him in the eyes. "I'm not trying to make you feel better. I have been attracted to you for a long time."
"Y…You have?" McKay asked tentatively.
"Yes."
"H…How long?"
"Hmph. Well, I think it was when you put that personal shield on and practically danced as you kept pissing everyone off with that whole 'Invulnerable' thing."
"Nuh-uh," McKay said.
Sheppard laughed. "That's a very fourth grade and not genius-sounding response."
"Yes, well, it is, well, I guess I am a little speechless."
"Oh. Good," John said as he took advantage of the quiet, and this opportunity. Sheppard leaned close and took McKay's lips with his own. A surprised sound came from the scientist, but it remained muffled in the cover of the colonel's kiss. John pulled away and said, "Hm."
"Hm?" Rodney mimicked back.
"You're a good kisser."
"Of course I am."
"You'd be even better if your lips weren't like ice cubes."
"Sorry, I…" McKay started to apologize, but John seemed to think it a waste of nice lips, especially apologizing for something the man had no control over. Sheppard kissed McKay again, placing his body chest to chest against the freezing physicist. An extended moan, followed by a hand pushing him away made the Air Force man stop his exploration of this new and fascinating territory before him.
"What?" John asked.
"Ow. You were, um, crushing my hand."
"Oh, shit. Sorry."
"No, no. This all seemed worth a little bit of suffering," Rodney explained.
"But only in theory," John surmised, as the push-back seemed to indicate.
"Definitely."
"Colonel Sheppard?" John heard in his earpiece.
"Teyla?"
"Yes. We are at the bottom of the hill. Which way should we go?"
"Hey, McKay. See that? I was right."
"You've been right once or twice before," Rodney said calmly.
"Very funny." To Teyla, Sheppard said, "Do you see a huge wall of snow in front of you? We're behind that."
"It is a cave?" she asked.
"A very shallow one. Don't let Ronon…"
A blast opened up a hole in the snow wall immediately, sending the rest of the beam from Ronon Dex's weapon to land on the rock just feet above Sheppard's and McKay's head.
"Too late," Rodney said.
"Damn it!" John acknowledged Rodney's observation as bits of rock and rock dust poured down on them.
Dex walked through the opening. "Sorry."
"No, it's okay," Sheppard replied grudgingly. "I mean, we're still alive."
"Lucky, that," Rodney noted acerbically.
"Are you injured?" Teyla asked as she followed Ronon in to find her missing teammates.
"A little. How are our friends out there?" the colonel asked as Ronon gave him a hand up. Both John and Ronon helped Rodney to his feet.
"Dr. Weir and Major Lorne's team are with them. They have apologized for their earlier actions. They said that they have been attacked by a people from another planet who come through the Stargate periodically."
"We could probably help them with that," Rodney said. "We could analyze their DHD for gate addresses and block the one that shows up for the times when they've been attacked."
"I believe that Elizabeth was explaining that as we left to come find you," Teyla answered with a smile. "Are you well enough to walk? Dr. Beckett is waiting in a Puddle Jumper at the end of the plateau. He could bring stretchers."
"Whatever it takes to get to Carson," McKay said, followed by, "Did I just say that out loud?" Teyla smiled as she took point.
John leaned close to his friend and said, "You're gonna make me jealous, talking about Carson like that." Rodney looked around quickly to make sure that neither Ronon nor Teyla was close enough to overhear.
"That was brazen," the scientist said quietly. He watched as Teyla stepped through the snow, well ahead of them. They stepped through to find – bright sunshine. "Unbelievable," Rodney grouched at the turn in the weather.
"It feels good," John said as he lifted his head to the sun. It didn't even feel cold, at least not in comparison to inside the cave. "Oh. Not brazen, by the way. Just anxious." Sheppard looked down at McKay's crotch. "I see that you're a lot less anxious."
"Yes, well, Ronon shooting at us kind of scared it out of me," Rodney admitted, the last part loud enough for the Satedan to hear.
"I wasn't shooting at you," Ronon clarified. "But I could."
"Are you going to let him say that to me?" Rodney asked John, again speaking in a softer tone so that only Sheppard could hear.
"Someone's going to have to keep you in line," John replied. "I'm planning to be otherwise occupied with you."
"Hm," Rodney answered. "Sounds…interesting."
"Oh, it'll be interesting," John shot back with a grin and a leer.
Rodney quickly thought of something else, anything but John: his cat, the Wraith, Madison, his sister, ugly Russian women. Anything to distract him from thoughts of the man beside him. Thoughts of John Sheppard 'molesting' him, in good and hot and pleasurable ways, of course.
Yes, those were definitely thoughts and actions for later.
The End.