So this little story came to me after watching the second installment of Downton Wars. This also wasn't intended to be a Father's Day story, but it could definitely work for that purpose. Enjoy some father and son interaction, with a hint of flirty Banna.
Disclaimer: I do not own Downton Abbey, Star Wars, or Downton Wars. Little Jack Bates is mine though. Any inaccuracies regarding Star Wars are entirely the fault of me only seeing the original Star Wars many, many years ago. Enjoy!
Cottage Wars
The clash of light sabers could be heard throughout the cottage as father and son waged a battle between good and evil. Whoosh, clang, whoosh, scuffle, whoosh.It was John's turn to play the role of the good Jedi on this day, he holding the blue wand firmly in his grasp, his cape flowing behind him as he ran through the family home, the "woosh" sound effect falling easily from his lips as he's chased by his son, the evil Sith Jack in today's game. Anna had left the house several hours ago, leaving her boys home alone with the strict order not to run amuck inside the house. Ever since John had introduced Jack to the world of Star Wars little Jack had become obsessed with Jedis and light sabers. So much so that John saw no other option than to relent when Jack begged day after day for a light saber of his own. Father and son waged almost daily light saber battles between good and evil, much to the chagrin of Anna who just couldn't understand what the fuss was about with Star Wars. Jedi this, Jedi that. She just couldn't wrap her mind around the appeal, but boys would be boys. And she couldn't help but be enamored by the way her husband would allow his own inner child to emerge while playing pretend with their only son. However, she could certainly do without the havoc it was wreaking on their tiny cottage. So help her if she came home to one more broken lamp!
Today's battle was especially intense, John and Jack knowing Anna's errands for the day were extensive and leaving the pair ample time to role-play to their hearts content, whilst still have time to put the house back in order.
"Ohhhh Daaaaaaddddy! Come out and plaaaaaaaay," Jack taunted as he entered the small sitting room. He could make out the figure of his father, Jedi John behind the tall lamp standing in the corner, the lampshade lifted from its rightful place and instead perched on Jedi John's head. It wasn't the best of disguises, but he was a large man and his options were limited when it came to evading his son's pursuits.
"I can see your powers are fading, Daddy," Jack continued on with his made up scenario, hinting for his father to go along with this particular game of pretend. "I bet your hands and feet are starting to grow fur…like a bear's!" His daddy bore a certain resemblance to a bear, so that seemed like a logical transformation to young Jack.
John snuck a peek down to the hand that was not holding the light saber and feigned shock at the state of his hands. He let out a gasp loud enough for Jack to hear, confirming that he was indeed going on with his imagination.
"Now, you're probably seeing…a PINEAPPLE! And it's going to start talking to you!"
John chuckled at his son's imagination. Talking pineapples? Wherever did he begin to come up with such things!
Of course, John played along like the wonderful and encouraging father that he was, "No, Mister Pineapple! Please don't hurt me, Mister Pineapple!" John then let out a sound such that he was trembling in fear, hoping Jack could still hear him. Jack's giggles at his father's statement confirmed that Jack approved of the direction in which John was taking their game.
Jack crept closer to John's hiding spot and could see John pretending to tremble in fear. "Gotcha!" Jack shouted as he surprised John in the corner, his red light saber striking the blue light of John's own.
"You'll never catch me alive, Sith Lord Jack!" John shouted, as he took off in as much of a run as his gimpy leg would allow, Sith Lord Jack close on his heels.
The pair worked their way throughout the downstairs of the cottage, through the kitchen and the sitting room, light sabers clashing together as the pair waged battle. They weaved their way through the sitting room of the modest cottage, John tossing the throw pillows from the settee at the feet of Jack, attempting to distract him and slow him down, their light sabers inadvertently knocking over potted plants and strewing books that were once piled on the end table on the floor. John then led the evil Sith Lord Jack out the back door to their garden, as he'd decided in that instant that it would likely be safer to take their battle outdoors and away from anything breakable. They had already made enough of a mess and were lucky not to break anything this time. The week he had spent on Anna's bad side for breaking her favorite lamp was not something he would soon forget, or desired to repeat. An entire week of no lovemaking seemed like an eternity compared to how often they would come together when he'd done nothing deserving of such a harsh punishment.
Father and son continued battling from one of the garden to the other, the plush grass under their feet, slightly damp from the rain showers earlier, and John's cape flowing behind him from both the breeze and the speed John was running along. Anna could mock him all she wanted, though nothing would change his mind on the matter. Capes were cool.
"You can't escape my evil powers, Daddy!" Jack shouted toward his father's retreating form, his joyful giggles diminishing his underlying threat of domination.
John ran as fast as his bum leg would carry him, yet knowing he'd need to stop for a breather soon enough.
'Time out, Jack!"
"I'm not Jack! I'm Sith Lord Jack, Daddy!"
John sighed, and could barely contain his eye roll. He loved his son - more than anything in the world – but the depth with which he could emerge himself in role-playing and other imaginative activities astounded him at times. But, he supposed he only had himself to blame for that, what with all the time he and Anna would spend reading to him while he was still in the womb and in the subsequent years after birth.
"I'm Sorry, Sith Lord Jack, but this Jedi needs a break. Your mum's chicken rogan josh from last night isn't sitting too well with all this running. Can we pause our battle for just a few moments while Daddy rests?"
"Ok. But, just for a few minutes, ok Daddy?"
"Perfect. We need to finish this battle before your Mum gets home anyway," John responded as he attempted to massage away the ache in his knee, "We can't have her coming home to the sitting room as it is now. She'll have our guts for garters."
"Our what?! That sounds GROSS!" Jack laughed as he followed John to sit on the tree stump in the corner of the garden.
John chuckled, "It's just something adults say. It means we'll be in a lot of trouble with Mummy unless we clean up our mess."
"Oh, like we'll be in time out?"
"Something like that. And believe me, son…we don't want that at all!" Jack's version of time out would likely be nothing more than losing his light saber privileges, or going to bed without a story first. John knew his own punishment would be much more severe. Simply put, there would be no sex with his wife for the foreseeable future.
John began to gingerly stand from his seated position on the tree stump, nudging Jack to do they same so they could head back inside and begin straightening the sitting room and the rest of the cottage before Anna returned home from her errands.
Just then they were alerted to another presence in the garden, a feisty voice John would recognize anywhere bellowing out into the peacefulness of the garden.
"Just what in God's name has happened to my sitting room?! Jack David and John Patrick Bates, I am very disappointed in you! I told you before I left, no light saber battles in the house!"
"Anna, love, you're home early," John sheepishly replied, sneakily hiding his light saber behind his back, Jack standing next to him doing the same with his chin to his chest hoping to escape his mother's wrath.
"Don't you love me, John Bates! I specifically told you boys not to play light sabers in the house, and the minute I leave the house, what do you do? Precisely what I asked you not to!"
"We thought you weren't going to be home just yet, and honestly, we were just about to go inside and tidy up when you found us in the garden," John replied in an attempt to appease Anna in some way.
"You better believe you'll be tidying up! And Jack, you may go play quietly in your room until it's time for your nap while your father cleans up this mess as I'm sure this was mostly his idea."
"Yes mummy," was Jack's solemn reply. He turned and ran quickly out the room to bound up the stairs, his dark hair so much like John's own flopping into his face. He dropped his light saber at the foot of the stairs before quickly running to his bedroom. Tidying up was not his favorite activity, so best to make himself scarce before his mother changed her mind. Though he also wasn't very excited about taking a nap. Naps were for babies, yet he had to admit he was feeling quite tired after chasing after his dad all afternoon. Perhaps a nap wouldn't be such a bad idea after all.
Anna waited until she heard Jack's bedroom door click closed and then ordered John to begin tidying. "Get to work in here, John and come find me in the kitchen when you're through."
Anna left John to get to work and headed to the kitchen for perhaps a cup of tea and a biscuit or two after she finished putting away the groceries she picked up while he was out. She had also bought something special from their favorite lingerie shop to show John later, but after finding her sitting room destroyed once again, she wasn't sure if had earned the right to see it. He'd most definitely have to work hard in the intervening hours to earn such a treat.
"Yes dear."
John quickly tidied the sitting room and the rest of the downstairs, his cape flowing behind him as he replaced pillows and straightened lampshades and books, hoping Anna wasn't too mad at him. He'd have to find a way to try to make it up to her.
Several minutes later, the downstairs of the cottage had returned to its suitably pristine condition, though he certainly wouldn't have had the skills for a career as a housemaid like Anna so naturally would have. With one last check of his handiwork, he headed to the kitchen to find Anna.
"Why are you still wearing that ridiculous cape?" Anna asked as soon as John entered the kitchen from the sitting room as she sat at the table flipping through a magazine.
John gave a little twist of his hips causing the cape to swish behind him. "What do you mean? Capes are cool."
"Capes are not cool, John. You look ridiculous!" Anna giggled, "Honestly, a grown man in his late forties wearing a cape."
"Jack thinks it's cool and I only wear it when we play Star Wars," John replied in his own defense. If he knew just one of Anna's weaknesses, it was how much she loved watching John engage with their son in such a playful way.
"You boys and your Star Wars. I don't get it. The force, opening doors with the power of my mind. Jedi this, Jedi that...I guess I just don't understand what the big deal is."
"You're just jealous that you can't keep up with us men," John smirked. At least with the way Anna was teasing him about his cape he could determine she wasn't too mad with him about wreaking havoc through the cottage with Jack.
"Well, Mr. Bates, we'll see who can keep up with whom later."
John couldn't keep his mouth from gaping open. Anna definitely didn't seem mad with him if she was insinuating a chance for sex later. "Well, Mrs. Bates, I hope I've proven to you over the years that I have no issues keeping up, as you put it."
"Hmmm…if only I could say the same when it comes to my corsets."
"Challenge accepted. As soon as Jack goes to sleep tonight I'll be sure to prove I have no difficulties keeping up when it comes to your corsets, too."
"Well, if you don't remove that ridiculous cape, you may never get the chance to find out. Honestly, John. A cape."
"Fine," John huffed, "if it'll make you happy and give me access to one of your devastatingly sexy corsets, I'll remove it." John reached up and began untying the cape from around his neck, removing it and draping it across one of the kitchen chairs. "Is there anything else I can do for you, Mrs. Bates?"
"Well, there are many things you can do for me, but since it's only the middle of the day and Jack can come out of his room at any moment, I'll settle for a cup of cocoa," Anna requested, prodding John with a subtle batting of her eyelashes.
"What Mrs. Bates wants, Mrs. Bates gets." John headed over to the stove, placing a gentle kiss on the top of Anna's head as he passed by her. "I love us," John proclaimed as he made his way toward the kitchen.
"I love us, too," Anna replied, sneaking a peak at his rear, now unhidden by his ridiculous cape as he walked away from her.
Like John so often did while in the kitchen, he couldn't stop himself from humming a tune as he placed scoop after generous scoop of cocoa mix in the pan before adding the molk. "Cocoaaaa, for Mrs. Baaaaates," he sang softly to himself, losing himself completely in the task at hand, daydreaming about the pending events that night and noticing little about his surroundings.
"Hello, John."
John gasped, almost dropping the entire can of cocoa mix on the floor before turning around to confront whoever startled him. He was not prepared for the sight that awaited him.
Anna stood before him holding Jack's discarded red light saber in her hands, looking at him in the most enticing manner. As much as his wife claimed to despise Star Wars, seeing her there holding a light saber was too sexy to resist.
"Bedroom. Now," John commanded before grasping onto one of Anna's hands and pulling her from the kitchen, all thoughts of cocoa replaced with far more pressing concerns.
Hand in hand, John and Anna ran up the stairs of the cottage toward their bedroom. John attempted to grab his cape on the way, hoping he might be able to get away with using it for a more adult kind of role-playing as he noticed Anna still held Jack's light saber in her hand.
"Leave the cape, John."
"But capes are cool!"
Anna responded only with a warning quirk of her eyebrow, before steeling her gaze with John's and quietly switching the light saber on until it glowed red, knowing John would need no further motivation than that to leave the cape behind.
"Right." John dropped the cape and bolted up the stairs as quickly as his leg would allow, Anna giving chase behind him.
Jack napped quietly in his room as John and Anna spent the afternoon not so quietly demonstrating just how much fun adult role-playing could actually be. And later on that night, John demonstrated that he didn't need to use the force to dispose of one of Anna's corsets.