A Regrettable Occurance
By Evil Dino Babe 69
This fanfiction is about Samurai Champloo. Champloo love bitches! Anyone who doesn't love Champloo is a tard. I am the uber-Champloo fan and I claim stuff that supposedly belongs to the characters and stuff! Others should like bow before my Champloo love. Mugen, Jin, Fu and the respective secret palces belong to the Cowboy Bebop people. Damn them!
Fu soon got tired of looking for the Samurai who smelled like Sunflowers. She had a very short attention span, so this was to be expected. Mugen and Jin had been tired of looking for the Samurai who smelled like Sunflowers for a long time, so they were really happy that she decided to quit. Mugen though had already spent all of their money on hoochies so they had nowhere to go and no money and it was all Mugen's fault because he was so dumb.
Luckily, there were a loot of woods in Edo Japan. otherwise, Mugen, Jin and Fu I don't like Fu! She's in the way. BOOOFUUUU! But she's cannaan and I can't get ridda her. would have starved to death or been ass-raped by donkeys. Something generally along those lines. I don't know because I've never actually been to Edo Japan and I don't know how many donkey's they have there. Also luckily as is undoubtedable Jin was hiding a chainsaw in his pants. So, with the woods, and the chainsaw and a lot of glue they built a house. It was in the tudor style with bay windows and garrets and awnings erotic torture chambers and lots of trees that meant stuff in wicca growing outside. Do to zoning variences, they had to paint the stucco on the outside peach, but only Mugen was no OK with that and we have already established that Mugen was domb.
When the house was done they all went "banzai!" for some reason and then went into the house. Ooops! They had totally forgotten to buy some hoochies for in the erotic torture chamber, so they just used each other instead and that's when they realized that they were in love.
There was a sign outside the house. It siad "Jin, Mugen and Fu". They had to put it there because otherwise the mailman wouldn't know where to deliver the mail and that was his job of course, otherwise he wouldn't have been a very good mailman he would have been a dogcatcher or a ninja or a ninja dogcatcher. Anyway, Jin would walk past the sign everyday on his way home from work and it made him think deep thoughts about the fact their three names were all written on the same piece of wood. He was thinking a lot of them, and about Mugen's succulent tookas, when he came home from work one day and his hand opened the door for him. Inside Fuu had just made some tea and put it on the kitchen table in the ktichen. She was humming. Her hum was like the rumble of a hundred pissed off but very very sexy bees unto Jin. Maybe that explained where she smelled so nice since bees like flowers.
"Hello husband #2!" she said. "How was your day?"
"It was fine until now Jin responded as he flicked his sword and other sword into the umbrella stand which was really more os a a sowrd stand given that umbrellas hadn't been invented yet. "The gardener dishonored our camelias so I slit his throat and had sex with his corpse." As proof of this, Jin flicked the blade of his not as long sword at Fu. There was blood on it. Then he put it in the sink with the other dishes. It made a clang sound on the good china.
Fu giggled and covered her face with her sleeve, you know, the way Aeka does in Tenchi Muyo 'cause fuu's kinda like Aeka only without the trying to marry her nephew. Though if she had a nephew, she would probably have married him too. "Oh no!" She said. "Not again."
Fu, Mugen and Jin tended to go through a lot of gardeners. All that pent up irasibility had to go somewhere, and no one ever missed the mexicans. Mugen, being the dumb one, had already lost track of how many corpses they had piled in the toolshed. Speaking of Mugen, he fell off od the ceiling and landed beside the table. On his ass. And had some tea. "Hey!" he said with a pout. "No fair! I didn't get any gardener corpse."
Jin shortly joined him in his tea while Fuu started to sponge off the not as short sword that was in the sink on her good china and still all bloody until she washed it. "Nonsense," he said, looking very eru-dite and Jin like. "I left him outside for you. He's under the willow."
Mugen was touched. His hand lit on Jin's shoulder in a brotherly love ggesture that in context could only be taken as not-so-brotherly. "Awesomeness" he said.
Fuu though wasn't happy at all. Her face wibbled and she almost dropped Jin's not as big sword down the drain and into the bowels of the edo sewer system. "But he's a corpse." She was crying. She was not pretty when she cried. "I can't have sex with him that way. It's... not... possible! If it was I would and all but..."
"I'll have sexyness with you," said Jin. Behind him, Mugen burped because he was all done with his tea and that meant lots of tea-burps. "On second though," Mugen said, "Lets have another threesome."
That made Fu very happy. She stopped crying but she did blow her nose with one of the nice dishtowels.
Jin shirked him and. They both fell to the floor
With a thumb like lettuce in a bin of other lettuce. Their pants came off. Fu cheered. She liked them with no pants on. Underneaht, Jin had on boxers and Mygen briefs, which was kind of strange. Gasp! They were wearing each other's underpants. That was damn sexy, thought Fu and she almost had an orgasm and stuff just looking at that underwear which was on the wrong hineys and stiff.
"I am so hot for you," said Mugen.
"I want to put my think in your butts," said Jin.
"I don't know about that," said Mugen. You're thing is so big and heavy and meaty. You might make me bust and O-ring and then I might pooh myself at some point in the future." Still, he was really hot and liked thinking of what it would be like to have Jin wriggling like a hot fish inside his secret place.
"I will be gentle," said Jin. "Like a cow treading daintily over newfallen snow."
"OK," siad Mugen. He felt better about it then and turned over onto his stomach so Jin could see his asshalves. They were so nice and swquishy. Jin had a good time fondling them. Between Mugen was already very wet and juicy. When he put his thing in him he yelped a little, and the was quiet except for moaning "Give it to me baby!" now and then. It was like riding molten velvet to the stars doing the nasty with Mugen. He liked doing the nasty with Mugen more than he liked doing the nasty with Fu. It was that good.
Romantically, they came at the same time and got very sticky together. Then, they lay down together in the kitchen under the glow of a thousand candles.
"I am glad," said Jin, "That we did not rape the gardener's corpse."
"So am I," said mugen.
Owari