Bottle-Fed
By Hayai-Akurei
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Disclaimer and Notes: As much as I wish I could be as talented and creative as CLAMP as to come up with characters like the Tsubasa-gumi…I'm not. They're not mine. Slight OOC in this one shot for those who don't like it, but an attempt at a little heartfelt camaraderie. Set sometime after "Acid Tokyo." And I know Fai's name is officially "Fay" but I'm a girl of habit…so his name will stick as "Fai."
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In all their time traveling, Kurogane knew that Fai was stubborn. Stubborn than a mule stubborn. Stubborn than even Tomoyo stubborn. Knuckle-grinding, mind-blowingly stubborn. Trying to put it to words would be as successful as trying to get the Space-Time Witch to marry him. It was absolutely infuriating. The wizard was always flitting away from danger (and any possibility of help) with a smile on his face like a flighty blonde pixie. But this…THIS was the last straw.
"No!" Fai pouted, sulking like a young child with his arms crossed and his back facing the ninja. "I don't want to, and you can't make me!"
If that first vein in his forehead hadn't popped, the other three had.
"You have got to eat, dammit!" he shouted, "I did not save your life for nothing!"
"I didn't ask to be saved, Kurogane," retorted Fai, venom laced in his voice. The dark-haired man winced at the full use of his name. "That was your own choice. And I'm making mine."
This certainly wasn't their first fight over the issue. It had started out somewhat civilly, but now it had escalated with each round. They became more frequent, after which Fai and Kurogane would break up to their separate rooms and not talk to one another for several hours. Their worst fight had kept them at odds for almost two days. They didn't get the children involved, because, quite frankly, it didn't concern them. Nevertheless, Sakura and "the original" Syaoran, Mokona included, gave the adults their space, fretting over them afterwards and forcing them to make up again and again.
Still, Kurogane was getting sick and tired of it.
"I won't do it!" Fai yelled. It seemed so uncharacteristic for him to yell, the ninja mused, but he was not to be distracted.
"Why can't you just accept help that others freely give to you?" he asked, fighting to keep his voice level. "Your heart is like an iron cage, Fai. Why won't you let anyone in?"
"Because…" The wizard's voice dropped so low he almost didn't catch it. "It hurts."
Kurogane froze.
"So many people that I've opened my heart to…it always hurts. They care so much and I end up frightened and I run away. It's the only way to make it stop hurting." He drew his knees up to his chest, looking so very small and fragile.
"And everyone I've ever cared about has gotten hurt. They hurt me, I hurt them in turn, which hurts me even more…it never stops, Kurogane! I can't get it to stop… Sometimes it's wonderful, but then it all falls apart and…I can't stand it. I'm not worth what you sacrificed for me, Kurogane. You'll only end up like the rest. I'm not worth being cared for…"
"You," he snarled, grabbing his arms. "You self-righteous bastard!"
Faster than Fai could bat an eyelash, Kurogane jerked him forward and placed a kiss on the wizard's black eye patch.
"You are the biggest, self-absorbed coward I have ever met!" he yelled, shaking him a little. Fai blinked, startled.
"Relationships always carry a risk. That's just the way things are," he said. "Everything has a chance of winning or failing, but you don't know which it'll be. And that's why you have to have that leap of faith. And if you fail, you just have to learn to get right back up. That's why we fall." Gently, he cupped the other man's face. "Fai, you can't keep going on alone like this. You can't carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. People need people, and you most of all."
"But you're going to die because of me!" exclaimed Fai. "You're my only prey! I'll just – "
Red eyes narrowed. "Just shut up for a second and let me finish." Sighing, he sat down next to Fai on the bed. "Do you think I'm weak?"
"N-no…why would I…"
"Then what makes you think I'd die just from a little blood loss?" he asked. "I've probably lost more blood fighting other ninja than I'll lose to you. It's not a big deal. I saved you because you mean something to all of us. The kids and the manju need you. And so do I."
Fai could hardly hear his own voice. "You do?"
"Trying to handle the three – four - of them is hard enough on just the two of us," he replied, "Are you trying to chicken out and saddle all the responsibility on me?" He paused, carefully running a thumb over the covered eye socket. "And I made a promise, Fai. I intend to keep it. I'm not going to let you die, okay? We're going to fight alongside you, all of us."
"Kuro…"
A wrist was promptly thrust in his direction.
"Now eat."
Fai groaned, turning away. "Kuro-taaan…"
"It's just for a little while," the ninja said, inwardly smirking at the name, "Just until we find the kid and your eye. But until then, just let us help."
For a moment, Fai paused. He started to lean towards him, but then drew back. The single blue eye wouldn't meet his. "I just…I don't want to hurt you…I can't do it." However, the mage's body language spoke volumes. He hadn't eaten for close to a week, and his face was pale and drawn, his body exhausted from all their fights.
"You idiot," Kurogane growled, rolling his eyes. With a hiss, Souhi was unsheathed from its scabbard. There was a flash of steel and a glimpse of blood and Fai yelped in surprise…
…only to have Kurogane stick his index finger in his mouth.
The tang of iron hit his tongue and his eye widened. He tried to jerk back, but his instincts were getting the better of him and he couldn't let go. He was so very hungry.
"If you can't do it now, we'll just have to wean you on it, won't we?" asked Kurogane. At Fai's questioning look, he said, "It's just a small cut, it'll heal up in a few hours."
Fai blinked, sucking on it lightly. This was so degrading; he felt like a baby.
'Damn you,' his eye seemed to say, and Kurogane smiled in satisfaction.
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And just because Kurogane was just ASKING for it…
OMAKE ENDING!!
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"You know…" Fai said, "I think you just made a mistake."
"And why would you think thaahaaaaa…" The ninja's words came a grinding halt as he flushed bright red, the wizard nibbling on the offered finger with his teeth. Smiling a Cheshire cat grin, Fai licked the slowly but steadily flowing drops of blood with his tongue, his now slitted blue eye turned up at him with a predatory gleam.
Oh almighty friggin holy gods in heaven NO… He was not going to be taken advantage of like this! The ninja tried pulling away, but two small fangs digging into his skin kept him from doing so.
"Where are you going?" asked Fai through a mouthful of finger. "I'm still hungry."
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(And Fai totally PWNZ Kurogane with his sexiness!!)
Crazy stuff. I tried going for something different, because their relationship is in for a bit of a tumble. But it seems a little odd that Fai either becomes a crazy blood-sucking maniac or refuses to eat at all and Kurogane lets him, so I tried my hand at something. Of course, Fai won't go without a fight. Those two are so funny.
And are there veins in your finger that will bleed enough if you nick them just right? I really don't know. Only cut my finger once on a pocketknife when I was little.