Prologue

by Lady Lin'air

The crew of Voyager has created a permanent home in the Delta Quadrant, and the New (caleasto) Federation is flourishing. But Tom Paris has found himself in a sticky stituation, but little does he know, has the others, that Destiny has a great path laid o

The caregiver Lin'air was not about to be moved by Kathryn Janeway, no matter how many times
she argued with her. They both were sitting in the Main Conference room, a vast chamber
rectangular in shape that could easily fit half a thousand people or more. Kathryn was
sitting at the front of the room a top a raised dais adorned with the traditional Caretakian
seat of power, while the Lady Lin'air, a blue-haired, blue-eyed beauty was seated
comfortably in the air, floating amiably across from the Prime Admiral.
"Lin'air, how many times have we argued over this?!" she asked impatiently, watching
her Caregiver file her nails. Lin'air was dressed in a pleasant blue cat-suit that matched
her royal blue hair and eyes. She was pale with slightly blue-hued lips and around her eyes
glittered a strange blue sparkle.
She looked up at Kathryn. "I don't know, why don't you tell me?" she asked airily.
Kathryn bolted upright in her chair, grabbing the thrones' arm rests so hard her knuckles
turned white. "Don't play those childish games with me, Lin'air; I thought we finished those
games a long time ago." she scowled. Lin'air looked at her, not the slightest expression
on her face. She continued to stare at Kathryn until the Prime admiral leaned back into her
seat and put her head in her hand. "I'm sorry, Lin'air, I'm tired. Sandra has kept Chakotay
and I up every night for the past week." The caregiver Lin'air landed upon the smooth
glass floor without a sound, and quietly walked to her Prime Admiral. She rested a hand on
her shoulder.
"I know," she said simply, her voice slightly tinged with concern. "Remember I've
been your caretaker ever since your sixth year in the Delta quadrant. I know everything you
think, feel, hear, say, and do." Lin'air fell elegantly to her knees and put her other hand
on Kathryn's hand. "And I know how difficult this is for you to accept."
"Difficult for me to accept? He's my crewmember! And she's your Kai'lin!"
"You mean he was your crewmember, and she will soon no longer be my Kai'lin!"
"I don't understand this!" she said and slammed her fist on her arm rest as she got
up. She walked down the dais a few steps before she whirled around to face Lin'air, who by
this time was standing up. "Why does she have to die? Why does her child have to die? I
thought you were caretakers, not killers."
"Kathryn I realize as have the caretakian council that this would be difficult for
you to accept, but there's no need to be insulting," the Caregiver said delicately. "May I
remind you that it was I who was able to get you a seat of power before my people as well
as respect from the Continuum? My people made you Prime Admiral over the Federation because
we knew you and your crew were the perfect candidates to lead a new federation of planets.
The Alpha Quadrant as well as your people and culture are trapped behind the wall the Dark
Lord's have created; there's no way to reach them. Therefore, you must accept other races
cultures as part of your own. Before me and my people, your no longer just a human. You're
our Ambassador . . .Prime Admiral of probably one of the richest galaxies in this universal
sector. If you are to remain this way you must integrate yourself into our culture and
society."
"Oh no, Lin'air, no no no . . . you don't understand. I understood my
responsibilities before I accepted the leadership of the Calee---- caleeaas----
oh dear . . ."
"Caleasto."
"Yes, of the Caleasto Federation as your people put it. What you don't understand is
that I am a human with my own culture, and that culture says that it's wrong to kill
innocent people."
"Oh Kathryn please," Lin'air said and turned away to face a huge glass window ten
yards away from her. "Do tell me how Ophelia and Tom are innocent in all this? Didn't I
specifically say to them both that they were not to see each other until Ophelia was at
least four years of age? Good grief Kathryn! Op'Helia is only three years of age and is
pregnant already!"
"Kes was in a relationship with Neelix before she was one. How is Op'Helia any
different?"
"Because Op'Helia is a Suspirian Ocampa!" Lin'air snapped, "and Kes wasn't. If Kes
were still alive Tom and she would have already have a child by now. Kes would have been
sixteen years old and already into her second eloguim." Lin'air turned to face the Prime
Admiral. "You do know that my kai'lins live for twenty-five years . . . longer than any
others?" Kathryn nodded her head. The Caregiver slammed her hand down hard on the top of
the throne. "Then Tom could've waited! But now because of him, I could be demoted to a
caretaker and all our plans for a New Federation and winning back Earth are jeopardized!
This is a serious offense! And Tomas Eugene Paris must be punished or else both of us and
your people will look like fools before the Elite Races!"
"Fine!" Kathryn said coldly. "Tom will be punished. But why banishment? Why not
prison?"
"Because!" Lin'air yelled, her patience growing thin with Kathryn and her questions.
Kathryn stared at Lin'air. "Because it is more logical to banish him from his homeland than
to lock him up in a cell. I am a Caregiver, and I know the better and more lasting
punishment would be banishment from his people, homeworld and culture. He will learn better
that way."
"But for life?" Kathryn asked, stepping up the dais to face Lin'air. "How can he
better off banished forever?"
"He can create a new life . . . find a more fitting wife for himself. He---"
"Fitting wife!? And may I ask you what that's suppose to mean?!" Kathryn cried
indignantly. Lin'air by this time was fuming. She didn't understand! she screamed inside
herself. She's a human! She'll never understand our concepts or ways!
"Op'Helia is an Ocampa," she began softly, sternly, " and not just any Ocampa, she's
a kai'lin, one of the most powerful of her race. I accepted her because her abilities, and
when she became my kai'lin, she accepted me, my rules, and my leadership. I told her to stay
away from Tom, and I told Tom the same. Did she listen? No! Instead she lied to me! And Tom
lied to you! They went deliberately behind our backs to see one another---"
"Why is it so important that Op'Helia be a certain age! Kes was one when she fell in
love with Neelix, and Ocampas become adults at one years of age! She---"
"This isn't about Kes! It's about Op'Helia and Tom and our honor as individuals and
as a race! How dare they disobey direct orders from their superior officers! Love is no
excuse to disobey me! They must be examples to everyone and we must be respected and feared! Therefore Tom must be banished for life and Ophelia and her child killed!"
"No!" Kathryn cried out, grabbing Lin'air by the arm and forcing her to face her.
"I will not allow you to put blood on my hands, especially that of my own crew member. A
compromise must be made!"
"A compromise!" Lin'air shouted in disbelief. She opened her mouth to ridicule her,
but then she was struck with a thought. A very clever thought, one that was not her own. It
was Kathryns', and Lin'air scanned her mind one last time and then smiled. "Yes . . . a
compromise . . ." she began slowly. Kathryn starred at her suspiciously. Lin'air could
sense her emotions of skepticism and untrust, and Lin'air couldn't blame her. She had become
a mother to her crewmen during the six years they were together, and she had a strong
emotional attachment to them, even to Tom. But underneath the untrust and skepticism was a
strong current of hope. Hope to save her crewmember from the worst possible punishment and
hope to save a young Ocampa from death. Lin'air's smile broadened.
"A compromise shall be made," she said slowly, dramatically. She watched as Kathryn's
features lightened up a bit.
"What sort of compromise?" she asked delicately.
"One that'll please you," the Caregiver said quietly and she turned and sat in the
throne. She put her hands on the arm rest, crossed her legs, and looked up at the Prime
Admiral. "Tom Paris will still be banished from this quadrant and his homeworld, Earth, as
well as Oreathesia---"
"Lin'air---" Kathryn began, but put she put her hand up to silence her.
"Instead of banishment for life, he shall be banished for a space of four years, and
then he shall be allowed to return to Earth and your people."
"And Op'Helia?"
Lin'air's expression darkened. "I don't know," she said simply, looking away from
Kathryn and into the space that separated them. She was silent for some long moments before
she turned and looked up at Kathryn again. " This is unheard of among my people as well as
the Ocampa. I don't know what the Caretakian council will say to my proposal of allowing her
to live."
"Then you will try and save her," Kathryn breathed, hope spilling onto her face.
Lin'air shook her head in despair. "It's always been our way to kill a Caretaker or
Ocampa when they have seriously committed a crime, and lying to a superior officer is most
grievous." She looked up into Kathryn's eyes, her blue ones glistening with tears. Kathryn
kneeled down and rested her hand on Lin'air's arm and squeezed it ever so gently. "When a
Caretaker, Caregiver or Center accepts an Ocampa as a kai'lin, they become your child in a
way, not just an apprentice for seven years. My people never forget our kai'lins. This has
been so hard on me because I've never had a kai'lin lie and deceive me before. And now she
is pregnant and I'm required to kill her. But Kathryn," she whispered, placing her hand on
top of Kathryn's, "I don't think I could ever kill one of my kai'lins, the same way you
could never kill your own daughter."
Speechless, they both sat in somber silence as the sun slowly descended into the
horizon.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Tom Paris was NOT in a good mood.
It had been years since he had been in a prison cell, and he had to be honest with
himself, he hated the beds they had in prison, no matter how long you spend getting use to
them. Although, he believed he shouldn't even be in prison in the first place, considering
he had done nothing wrong. He simply had been a victim of one of the Caregiver's erratic
mood swings.
Tom moaned to himself and leaned up against a gray prison wall. Who was he kidding?
He disobeyed a direct order from both the Prime Admiral and the Caregiver herself. He
thought he had changed over the years on Earth, but his past and his hormones caught up with
him. Whenever he looked at Op'Helia, with those kind blue eyes and her golden hair soft as
silk, how could he stay away from her? No, it had been no use; he had given into his
feelings and now he was paying the price for it. Six months ago, when Lin'air had given him
his first warning, he thought that it had been some kind of joke. Op'Helia had been two and
a half then when he first befriended her, and he remembered Kes being even younger when she
was in a relationship with Neelix. So he didn't see what the big deal had been. Lin'air
told him to keep away from her until she was at least four, but he had ignored her. He began
seeing Op'Helia secretly, and their relationship escalated rapidly.
He remembered that night that started all this, Op'Helia being punished and he
being apprehended. It was the night of the Festival of the Suns, a celebration the caretakers
celebrated every five years. The Prime's had been invited to attend, and of course, if
Op'Helia was there, he was there. Little did he know that the Festival was a caretakian
Valentine's day, and Tom found himself caught up in a desire towards Op'Helia he'd never
felt before. He was sure it was some telepathic side effect that effected humans. He had
been sitting next to Op'Helia when they were eating a grand dinner, and it was as though he
could feel her every movement, smell the light perfume of her hair and hear her breath
gently through those delicately parted lips. Everything had been exquisite about her, and
when she touched him, even in the slightest way, the hair raised on the back of his neck.
After dinner he had walked outside into the cool evening air. The sky was a tinted
pink in the horizon with flaming stars as far as the eye could see. He walked onto a field
and sat down on a bench and star gazed for a while. It was cool outside, and Tom welcomed
it. He thought about Op'Helia, couldn't stop thinking about her. She was so perfect in every
way, was the very essence of what Tom had dreamed of when he was young and more. And hour
passed, and the next thing he heard was a russle of fabric. He whirled around to see
Op'Helia standing less than a meter away from him. He had smiled. "I thought you'd never get
here." She smiled at him, clutching with one hand the cowl of her cloak and looked down.
She sat down next to him, adjusting her cloak as she did so. She was so beautiful in the
starlight, Tom realized. Her blue silk dress accented the curves along her body, from her
breasts to her hips, and the starlight glistened ever so mysteriously off of the flowers
that adorned her hair. As she sat silently next to him, he was more aware of her than ever
before.
All of a sudden she had smiled, and he heard a soft chuckle under her breath. He
looked at her and asked, "What's so funny?" She looked at him with her blue eyes, blinked,
and still smiling said softly, "You."
Tom had arched an eyebrow. "What did I do?" And then he heard Op'Helia chuckle again
, and felt her hand against his chest. She whispered in his ear in a low husky voice, "It
not what your doing . . . but what your thinking." He sighed, felt his heart begin to
quicken, and he looked at her more intensely. He was so close to her now that he breathed
in the smell of her hair, of her body odor, of her clothes, of her. He cradled her head in
between his hands, the very pores of his skin seemed to tingle. It had definitely been his
body's reaction to her intense telepathic aura, and he liked it, almost too much. He had
never felt more alive. She had looked up at him those same enchanting eyes and read the
same desire in her that he felt. He kissed her, very softly at first, allowing his lips to
melt against her in a gentle rythum. When she had wrapped her arms around his neck and he
had paused the kiss so as to steady his breathing, she quietly echoed his name. He felt her
breath against his cheek, heard her ragged breathing. What followed had been inevitable,
for they were totally and utterly lost to each other. In her bedchamber that night, he had
experianced a passion like he had never felt before. One that only Op'Helia could quench.
Tom, returning to reality, which was a cold, gray prison cell, sighed to himself. He had to
admit to himself, he loved Op'Helia. He loved the way she spoke, the way she walked, the
way she thought; he loved the way she helped and comforted others, the way she would become
angry at him when he did something wrong; he loved all her faults (even though he didn't
believe she had any), as much as he loved her strengths, he loved everything about her,
even to the smallest touch, and it was that love that made him want to have her for his
wife for the rest of his life.
Someday, he thought to himself, someday I'll get out of this and I'll return to
her, and we'll be together for the rest of our lives, no matter what the Caregiver says.
With that thought, he was able to doze into a light a uneasy sleep.

* * * * * * * * * * * *


Op'Helia couldn't sleep. She lay awake, staring up at the ceiling, thinking about
the days past events. She was worried about Tom, and she was also worried about herself.
She was going to have a baby; Op'Helia didn't know the slightest thing about raising a child
; Lin'air still considered her one.
Op'Helia scoffed and turned on her side, thinking miserably about her Caregiver
Lin'air. How dare she still consider her a child, why she was three years old, and a very
mature three year old for that matter. She hated it when she treated her like a infant,
while the older kai'lins got to do more interesting things, and she was stuck behind
attending to her humans and schooling with Lin'air on the "finer" points of caretaking.
Op'Helia sighed heavily to herself. She closed her eyes, knowing she had to get
some sleep. But the image of Tom floated in somehow, and she ended up tossing to her other
side, and then onto her stomach as she desperately waited for sleep to come. Without even
wanting to, she began thinking of Tom. It was this same bed where he had made love to her,
and because of that, insomia plagued her. She remembered his warm arms, the way he had run
his hands over, remembered the caresses, the way she could wrap herself around him and he
would hold her tight, the sweet things he said in her ears; oh, it was too much to bear,
and she bolted up right in bed, her covers falling from her as she did so. She sighed again
and closed her eyes. She missed him so much, and she had no idea what the Caregiver would
do with him. Did he know that she was pregnant with his child? Probably not. It was
doubtful that the Caregiver or the Prime Admiral would tell him. Perhaps, if Lin'air had
her way, he would never know.
Instantly, Op'Helia ripped the covers from her and got out of bed. She
wouldn't . . . couldn't allow that to happen; Tom was the father and he had the right to
know. She changed into a simply white dress and grabbed her cloak. She slipped on some
white slippers so no one would be able to hear her walking down the corridors, and then
headed for the door. The doubled door slid open with a soft sigh, and Op'Helia peeked her
head out to see if anyone was in sight. There was one person, working on a console at the
far end of the corridor. She instantly recognized the jet-black hair and the Chinese
features. Harry Kim. He was Tom's best friend and he would tell her where Tom was being
held.
Harry I need you to help me. He stopped what he was doing and looked around. I need
you to tell me where Tom's being held, she asked him telepathically. Then he saw her,
peeking out of her quarters. Harry arched an eyebrow and asked, "Why?"
Op'Helia hushed him and bade him to come to her. He set his instrument down and
walked over to her. "Because I'm going to see Tom," she whispered in response. She watched,
as Harry's eyes grew wide.
"Are you insane?!" he said a bit too loudly, and Op'Helia hushed him again. He
glanced over his shoulder for a second and grew close to Op'Helia, becoming very stern.
"Are you insane? Tom and you are already in enough trouble as it is. Do you want him to get
in more trouble with the Caregiver and the Prime Admiral? If you go see him you know how
Lin'air will see it. She'll blame it all on Tom, and she'll execute him."
"The Prime Admiral wouldn't let Lin'air execute him, and besides there's something
very important for Tom to know."
"Like what?"
Op'Helia didn't answer him. "Just tell me where he's located in the brig."
"No. I can't do that, then I'll get in trouble and I don't want the Caregiver's bad
temper raging towards me. Just tell me what it is you need to tell him and I'll tell Tom
when I go down to visit him in the morning."
"No! I want to tell him myself. It's very important. He needs to know."
"Needs to know what?"
"Just tell me where he is, and if you don't I'll go down there and look for him
myself!" she said exasperated. Harry was quiet for a moment, eyeing her curiously. Then he
said very softly, "Something's wrong, isn't there?"
Op'Helia swallowed hard. "Perhaps." He stared at her intensively, and Ophelia
lowered her eyes. "I'm pregnant."
Harry drew in a quick breath and then looked away. "So that's why he's being
banished," he told himself.
Op'Helia stared at him shocked. "Banished?!"
Harry looked back at her. "He's being held in cell A4. You'll have to go through
a few corridors down there, but you'll find him."
"What's the clearance code to accessing the brig doors? I won't be able to get
into the brig if I don't have that."
"Alpha nine two dash beta."
"Thankyou," she breathed, and then headed down the corridor to the turbo lift. The
last thing she heard Harry say was, "Be careful." And that she would be.
She walked into the turbo lift and told the computer to take her to the brig. The
computer chirped and then announced, "The brig is inaccessible to unknown personnel. Please
instate the necessary access code."
"Alpha nine two dash beta." The computer chirped again and then she felt the
turbolift move beneath her feet. As the lift took her to her destination, she thought about
what she would tell Tom. How would she break it to him? Would he be happy? Or maybe he
wouldn't want the child. What would she do then? Worries and doubts began to cloud her
mind. Suddenly the lift stopped, and the doors swished open. As she walked down the long
corridor to access the two doors that lead to the brig, various scenarios came into her
mind. First she imagined the look of surprise and joy that came onto his face, and he would
ask her various excited questions and then hug her, and kiss her gently on the neck. Or,
she thought dimly, he would be surprised and then stay quiet and not say anything to her.
He would be disappointed, and then he may not care about her anymore. Op'Helia shook that
thought from her head. Of course he would still care for her, it was the baby she was
scared he wouldn't care for. She finally reached the doubled doors, and punched in the
access code that would lead her to Tom. The doors swished open, and she stood face to
face with Lin'air, with Kathryn beside her.
"Op'Helia?" the Prime admiral asked coldly, arching an eyebrow. She looked at
the Caregiver, and her face was like granite. Op'Helia swallowed hard, and took back a
step. There was a moment of uneasy silence, and then Lin'air's face broke into a grin; not
a happy grin, but a cold, devilish smile that chilled her to the bone.
"So you came down here to tell Tom you were pregnant with his child, did you?"
she said curtly, eyeing Op'Helia harshly. And then she laughed, a high, cold, mocking
laugh that cut straight to her in the heart. "Trust me child, he already knows."
Op'Helia was surprised for a moment, then asked, "What did he say?" Her fear was
evident on her face. Lin'air and the Prime Admiral exchanged glances, and then Lin'air
looked back at her, her eyes sharp. "Well what did you think, you silly child. Of course
he doesn't want your baby."



Harry Kim was worried.
As he walked down the gray, colorless corridor to the doubled doors at the end,
his thoughts were filled with Ophelia and Tom. Harry was worried about them both. The
Caregiver was going to banish him for life all the way to the Andromeda galaxy and Ophelia's
life, as was the baby's life at stake. Harry was all too aware of the delicate ties of
trust and honesty the kai'lins shared with their Caretakers or Caregivers, and he had told
Tom not to get involved with any of Lin'airs kai'lins because he had a bad feeling that
something like this was going to happen. As usual, Tom rationalized his way out of Harry's
advice, as well as his other two closest friends, Danir di la Ventaro (or in human terms,
Daniel Black), and Peter Pettigrew. Harry and Tom had met them when Lin'air and Kathryn
were organizing the Caleasto (new) Federation. That was five years ago.
He shook his head to himself as he walked through the doors and into the cool night
air. Harry stopped to breathe in the fresh scent of exotic flowers on this planet,
Alpha Prime, the center of the Caleasto Federation. This was to be his home for the rest of
his life. When Harry helped Chakotay set up residence on the planet, he had hated it. All
he could do then was compare all the things it didn't have that earth did. But when he and
his wife moved onto the planet with their child, the place grew on him. He now was glad he
had moved onto the surface with B'Ellana.
He walked down the stone staircase and walked briskly onto a paved path that
winded around a park. The city was beautiful at night. The grass sparkled as the moonlight
bounced off of the dew, and the bushes of flowers danced gently in a soft breeze. Far off
into the distance he could hear the gentle rushing of the River Leonne, and the windows of
the buildings across the river reflected off the dark river water.
He walked past several houses where he could hear the faint chatter of laughter and
talk, and then he stepped down a plight of stairs and walked onto the porch of his house.
Pressing a several buttons into the control panel to his right, the doors slid open with a
quiet swish and he crossed the threshold into his house. He was greeted by his wife
B'Ellana, who was passing through the front hall as he stepped.
"I was wondering when you'd get home," she said. She walked past him into an another
room, the Living room. He followed her in.
"I had to stay behind a bit and fix a console some idiot blew out." He set his case
that he had been carrying on the floor beside the couch, and then sat down into the couch
and covered his face with his hands.
He could feel B'Ellana watching him from the side of the room. He felt her sit down
next to him. "Your worried about Tom, aren't you?"
"Well, it certainly isn't about the console I just fixed!" he said, a bit of
exasperation in his voice. He heard her sigh.
"For once, I don't know what to do. I talked to the Prime Admiral about it
yesterday, and she said she was working on it. Other than that, I don't think there's
anything the rest of us can do."
"Stupid Tom!" said Harry as he bolted off of the couch. "None of this would have
happened if he had listened to us. I told him Lin'air would find out somehow, but he ignored
me."
"Well then, who told Lin'air?" Asked B'Ellana, crossing her arms across her chest
in concern, "It certainly wasn't me, and I know you wouldn't have told her . . . . and if
the two of us, Peter and Danir were the only ones who knew about them, then it'd have to be
one of them."
"I bet it was Danir," said Harry, pointing his finger at his wife. "He always spends
a lot of time with her in the first place."
B'Ellana rolled her eyes at him. "Please tell me your joking. Danir helped Tom and
Ophelia see each other. Just because Danir is a kai'lin doesn't mean you can automatically
assume its him. If Danir hadn't distracted the Caregiver when Tom was leaving Ophelia's
quaters Lin'air wouldn't of banished Tom, she'd killed him."
"Well it certainly couldn't have been Peter! He's too scared of the Caregiver to
even speak to her." Harry turned away and faced a dark window, starring out into the night.
He was so confused, and he never felt this helpless before. He crossed his arms across his
chest and heaved a great sigh. He, like B'Ellana, didn't know what to do. They wanted to
help him, but found that their hands were tied. Behind him her heard his wife get up from
the couch and stroll over to him, wrapping her arms around him and pressing herself against
him.
"I don't know Harry," she whispered, "I just don't know anymore."

* * * * * * *

It was dawn, and the sky was bright pink and gold as the sun peeked over the
horizon. The trees casted long shadows, and the grass, wet with condensation, sparkled in
the early morning sun. Lin'air and Ophelia were sitting silently next to each other on a
park bench, not looking at one another. Lin'air had asked her to take a morning stroll with
her--- partly because she wanted to get outdoors for once, when other citizens weren't
around, and also because she had a great desire to speak to her in private.
It was going to be a difficult challenge though, speaking to Op'Helia is a calm and
rational way. What Lin'air really wanted to do was yell, 'I told you so,' to her face,
but a Caretaker was above such childish theatrics. She noticed out of the corner of her
eye that Ophelia was sitting very stiff, her eyes directed towards the sunrise. Lin'air
sighed inwardly. She just knew Ophelia was going to explode, considering Lin'air could
sense the wave of distrust and hostility coursing through out her body. Lin'air hid her
distress beneath a tranquil mask. She just hated when one of her kai'lins were angry with
her, even if it was their fault.
"Ophelia."
She didn't answer. She kept staring in front of her with a somber expression.
"Ophelia."
The hostility was ebbing away into anger. Lin'air could not hear the thoughts with
in Ophelia's mind; the girl had mastered the skill of hiding her thoughts from other
telepaths long ago. She did, however, needed to critique the art of covering her emotions.
Lin'air turned herself inwards so as to face Ophelia so she would be able to speak to her
face to face. Ophelia did not move. The Caretaker placed a hand gently on Ophelia's knee,
and repeated softly, "Ophelia?" Her kai'lin still did not answer but her body had stiffened
even more so than before. Ophelia was angry; Lin'air could read her emotions, not through
telepathy, but by the contorted look that spread across her face.
"Ophelia, I know your listening to me," stated Lin'air. "I understand I'm being very
hard on you, this is hard for me too. I've never had to deal with this before--- if you had
just listened to me . . ." She trailed off. Perhaps chastising her wasn't the wisest
course of action at the moment. She was quiet for a time, then began, " I know how you feel
towards Tom. I understand that your very attracted to him, but------"
"No! You're wrong!" snapped Ophelia, rising from Lin'air side and stepping a few
feet away. She whirled around at her Caregiver. "You think I'm just attracted to him?! Well
you're wrong Lin'air, because I love Tom."
"Ophelia you're too young to understand wh---"
"Oh shut-up!" yelled Ophelia, turning away from Lin'air again. "Why do you insist
on treating me like a child? All the people at the Courts treat me how I should be treated."
She turned around again and glared at Lin'air. "Like an adult. I am perfectly capable of
sustaining a relationship, and Tom and I ----"
"That's enough!" Lin'air snapped, going to her feet. "How dare you speak to your
superior, you Caretaker in such a fashion. I will not tolerate this." Lin'air took a deep
breath, but that was a mistake. Ophelia seized the opportunity.
"All you care about is yourself! All you're worried about is how this will make you
look before the Center and the Council. You don't know how I truly feel! You don't care!
You just don't want to look like a fool!"
"Ophelia!"
"Does the Caretakian council know that I'm pregant with a human's child? Do they
know that the famous Lin'air wasn't able to control her own kai'lin? Just imagine how
embarressed you'd be if they discovered the truth, the ridicule you would have to face, the
scorn! Why you'd be the laughing stock of the Council as well as the Continuum. No matter
how hard you try though, Lin'air, you can't stamp out the truth. All your efforts will be in
vain, because either way, you'll be made of fool out of." She was quiet after that.
No words passed between them as Lin'air glared at Ophelia with the upmost feroicity.
More moments passed without a word said, and Ophelia began to wither under Lin'airs cold
gaze.
"You poor misguided girl," growled Lin'air. "If only you knew the trouble I've gone
through for you." She walked up to her kai'lin and raised her hand to strike, Ophelia
cowering in front of her. " I went to the Center last night, Ophelia, dear," she began
softly, coldly, "I went to the whole Caretakian council and laid my case before them. And
you were right, Ophelia, they did laugh and scorn me, they did wonder how Lady Lin'air,
daughter Destiny, could possibly lose control of her own kai'lin, her own apprentice. They
wondered if I was truly fit to be a Caregiver." Lin'airs hand hung precariously in the air,
her face contorted in fury. "Yes, I was embarressed, but I didn't go last night to make and
idiot of myself, I went there, to save your and your child's lives. Yes . . . ." Lin'air
sneered, watching Ophelia's face turn to confusion and shock, "Yes, you didn't know that a
disobetient kai'lin was put to death if they went against direct orders of their superiors
. . . . a charge, may I remind you, that you're guilty of? So you know what they did? In
exchange for your and your child's lives, they stripped me of my title Caregiver and demoted
me to a silver class Caretaker." She lowered her hand slowly, keeping her eyes on Ophelia.
"You should be grateful that I'm allowing you to live, allowing you to remain my kai'lin.
Other Caretakers are not so kind to their apprentices. And be grateful that I didn't kill
Tom when I had the chance." Lin'air turned and began to walk away, but she had only moved a
few paces before she turned and faced Ophelia again. "You were wrong though, when you said
I didn't know how you felt. I do know how you feel, Ophelia dear, I had to go through
something just like you're going through."
Lin'air turned around and walked away, leaving Ophelia to ponder what she meant.

* * * * * *

Oh, what a fool I made of myself! Ophelia screamed remorsfully inside of her. She
had left the park and was slouched over a blue table in Ten Forward. She was shaking her
head, her hands covering her face. She was crying. What a disobedient snitch I've been, and
to my own caretaker! How could I have said all those awful things to her? After what she
had done for me!? How can I ever repay her? Ophelia rested her head on the table, using her
hands as cushions; the tears flowed freely down her face, small gasps of guilt left her
mouth. How could she have done that? How?
"Ophelia? Why, whatever is the matter?"
Ophelia looked up to see the kindly face of Neelix, the Head Cook, baring down on
her with a look of concern.
"Oh Neelix . . ." she heard her self saying, "It's all my fault!"
This was very unlike her; she usually never told anyone about her problems, but this
time . . . she felt she could make an exception. Besides, who else was left to talk to?
None of her other fellow kai'lins knew about the child, save Danir, and he was off on a
Ambassadors mission. The other kai'lin, Mira, didn't know about the child---- yet.
Neelix sat down across from her and pulled out a cloth, dirty with food, and offered
it to her. Ophelia took it from him, but didn't use it. Instead she wiped her eyes with
the back of her hand, only to break down again.
"Oh, Neelix, how could I have been so stupid?" Neelix patted her gently on the hand.
"Now, now, then, why all this crying? Tell me what's wrong. Why . . . everyone does
say how well I listen?" He smiled at her, and she gave a weak smile in return. And so she
began, from the front of the story, when she first met Tom, to the very end, when she told
him about the confrontation early this morning. Neelix was very quiet throughout the whole
story, and he was right, he did have a talent for listening. He asked very few questions,
and patted her comfortingly on the arm when she broke down.
"Well, you certainly do have quite a predicament. That, and . . .well . . . you
shouldn't of yelled at your Caretaker like that. I've heard stories that kai'lins can be
banished for being so rude."
"I know . . . she really is good to me, y'know that? Yes, she is very difficult
to please, and she can be down right nasty when she can't get what she want, but other than
that, she's really always been there for me." She looked away, staring at the floorescent
table. "I was so excited when she asked me to be her kai'lin. Mama said that I was very
lucky, that all of Lin'airs former apprentices were highly respected Caretakers or trans-
universal diplomats. I was so excited and so ready to prove myself to her, I didn't pay any
attention to what people were telling me."
Neelix's brow furrowed. "What were they telling you?" Ophelia looked back up at him.
"They all said that Lin'air was the best, but that she was very hard and restrictive
towards her kai'lins. People said that she considered them her children, until they matured
and left her fold to become full Caretakers. They said that she could be hard to reason
with, if at all."
"Then maybe that's why she still considers you a child. You're just about to turn
four and your already going to have a baby. A mother wouldn't be too thrilled about her
daughter having a baby when she was too young, would she?"
"No . . . I guess not. But, Neelix, I am three years old. I'm an adult now. I
just don't understand why she insists on treating like I'm only a month old."
Neelix shook his head at her. "Nor will I. That's something you'll have to discuss
with Lin'air."
Ophelia lowered her eyes to stare at her hands. "Thankyou Neelix for listening to
me. I really had no one else to turn to."
"Am I one of the few who know about your secret?"
Ophelia nodded.
"How long do you think this is going to stay a secret?"
Ophelia shrugged.
"Hmph. Well," Neelix rose from the table, "your secret is safe with me. And oh,
Ophelia," Neelix leaned down across the table to whisper something to her, "Go and apoligize
to Lin'air. They last thing you need now is to have your Caretaker upset at you." Ophelia
smiled, and nodded.
"Thankyou Neelix." She rose from her seat and strolled off towards the door. But
suddenly she stopped. An interesting thought had just popped into her head, a mysterious
thought. Ophelia turned around to face Neelix, who by now was behind his counter.
"Neelix? Do you by chance know if Lin'air ever had a child?"
A loud crash sounded from where Neelix was and he yelled in pain. Ophelia walked
over to where he was, and noticed that he had dropped a frying pan on his foot. He looked
up at Ophelia uneasily. "Wh-- what do you mean, 'h--have a child?'"
"She mentioned something about how she knew how I felt. I just thought that since
I'm having a baby, she might have had one too."
Neelix let out an uneasy laugh, and then bent down to pick up the frying pan.
"Why, no---no no no, of course not! Why would she mention such a thing to me? Now, if you
don't mind, I must start on this Jabola fudge cake for the banquet tonight."

* * * * * *

Lin'air was sitting at her desk, slowly tapping her fingernails on the table. It
was a custom she had picked up from B'Ellana Kim, who was known for her bad temper.
B'Ellana had always rapped her fingernails against a surface to aleviate stress and anger,
much to the annoyance of others around her. But there was no one around Lin'air at the time;
she had receded to the quiet comfort and tranquility of her Ready Room--- another custom
she had picked up from the former Federation, this one from Janeway, former Captain of the
USS Voyager. Lin'air was still raging inside at the rudeness of her kai'lin. Never in all
the years she had been a Caretaker (which happened to be six hundred and twenty-five), had
she ever been spoken to in such a fashion. It was embarressing as much as it was infuriating
. Lin'air was certain every Caretaker and Q from the Milky Way, to the very reaches of this
universal Sector was mocking her about now. Oh, she didn't think she could ever look into
the faces of the Caretakian council ever again, much less the Continuum.
Lin'air put her head in her hands. She really only had herself to blame for her
embarressment. Op'Helia was the daughter of one of her former kai'lins, Sorcis, who had been taken advantage of when she was five years of age. Because only Sorcis knew who the father was, and refused to divulge it to anyone, including Lin"air, Op'Helia was born illegitimately, and there fore unable to become any telepath with rank because a Careatker, in order to accept her, had to have approval of both parents. Lin'air knew this, and willingly broke the code. Other Caretakers had warned her that this would be a disaster. Other Caretakers and Q's repeatedly told her that an Ocampa with no father was a dangerous one. But Lin'air had ignored them. She had seen unnatural potential and abilities in the girl, and against all the rational reasoning, took her for her kai'lin.
And now she was paying the price for it.
Lin'air lifted her head from off her hands and covered her mouth with them, looking upwards at the ceiling. Was it wrong of her to keep Ophelia and her child alive? Yes, she had done the same for Ophelia's mother, but unlike Ophelia, Sorcis's conception was not voluntary. Ophelia's was. And by Caretakian law Lin'air had the right to kill Ophelia and her child, because she had disobeyed direct orders. Kathryn had convinced her to save Ophelia's life, futhering her embarressment before all the Elite Races. But it hadn't just been Kathryn's intervention that had changed Lin'airs mind, it was something else too. And it was bothering her.
She sighed to herself. She was awful tired, though she knew not why. She had retired earily last night, though, she did have a fretful sleep. And then she had woken eariler than usual to speak to Op'Helia, which had ended in disaster. The emotional stress this was all having on her was beginning to take its toll.
There was a knock at the door. Lin'air stared at it for a moment. She hadn't even felt through her telepathic abilities that someone was approaching the door. She had been too caught up in her thoughts. Lin'air sighed wearily again.
"Come in Kathryn."
One of the doubled doors opened and Kathryn's head poked out. "Lin'air?" She stepped into the room and closed the door behind her, then turned to face her Caretaker. Lin'air knew she was lost for words. The two of them stood there in a quiet silence neither bothered to fill, and for a few long moments, neither one thought they ever would. But then Kathryn took a step forward and clasped her hands in front of her, and gave Lin'air a weak smile. "You did the right thing, Lin."
She didn't say anything to Kathryn's words. Lin'air stared at Kathryn, her eyes burdened with sorrow. Then she sighed, a great despairing sigh, and turned and stood up from behind her desk. "You humens are so naive," she said, "You believe that whenever someone does the right thing, the do-gooder will be rewarded." Lin'air walked around to the front of her desk and leaned against it, crossing her arms. "It doesn't work out that way."
"I know. We say that the right thing is the best thing, but we also say that the universe wasn't made to be fair."
Lin'air chuckled at that remark, and nodded solenmly. She turned away to face a large rectangular window that flooded the room with bright sunlight. She was able to see through the sun's glare a stream of people, all of different ethnicities, swarming around outside. Some were dressed in uniforms, carrying cases and various other tools, others were mere citizens, enjoying the splender of the park. They all were so happy, so unaware of the troubles in the Federation, unaware of the threats and the dangerous politicians, unaware of their Caretakers' disgrace.
"I'm so sorry Lin'air."
She turned around to face Kathryn, and gave her a slight nod of gratitude. She walked back over to her desk. "Your apology will not give me back my Caregivership. But thankyou though." She sat down in her chair, and looked to the door. "You can come in now Ophelia. There's no need to hide behind my doors." Kathryn whirled around to stare at the doors. One of the wooden doors opened slightly, and the beautiful, slim figure of Ophelia slid in between the doors. Lin'air turned around in her chair and faced the wall. Ophelia gave a small nod and a weak smile to the Prime Admiral, and Kathryn gave a stiff nod in return. She turned around again, and announced, "I promised Chakotay I'd join him for breakfast. Sandra's . . . she's finally slept the whole night through since she was born." She brushed past Op'Helia and then she was gone.
The only sound in the room was a soft whirling noise from one of Lin'air's alien instruments. Ophelia was nervous, Lin'air could feel it. She was also twirling her hands together, and she always did that when she was nervous. Lin'air turned around in her chair and faced Ophelia.
"Save it. I don't want to hear it."
Her kai'lin looked taken aback. "Bu---but Caretaker!"
"I already know why you're here, and that's to apoligize. There's no need for it. You're young and you acted on impulse, and for that I can forgive you. But never," Lin'air stood up, "in all the days of being a Caretaker have I been spoken to in such a fashion. Your own mother never would have spoken to me like that, and I always considered her my most impudent apprentice."
Ophelia's eyes were now staring at the floor. "Thankyou Caretaker." She turned to the doubled doors and walked over to them, and then stopped. She turned around and lifted her eyes to Lin'air. "Why did you do it?" she asked simply. Lin'air stared at her. "Why did you sacrafice your Caregivership on behalf of me?"
"Ophelia," she said softly as she walked out from behind her desk, "I know what people said about me, the warnings other Kai'lins gave you when I accepted you as my Kai'lin. I know I'm very protective of my Kai'lins, because I don't truly consider them adults until they leave me to become Caretakers or Delegates. But I also often admit to myself that Ocampas mature faster than most other species, and please understand, that's hard for me to admit. I don't want them to make any mistakes that they will regret in their short life spans." Lin'air stepped up to Op'Helia and took her arms firmly in her hands. "But my Kai'lins now live longer than any other, and still I find it difficult to let go of them and make their own choices, whether good or bad. Do you understand?"
Ophelia nodded. "You still think I'm too young to know what's good for myself." Lin'air nodded. "But Lin'air, I am three years old now, fully capable of sustaining a relationship, and marriage and mothering a child. Please, just give me a chance to prove myself, to make up for what I've done, and then you'll see that I've matured. I can take care of myself, and the child. Heavens knows that if my mama could raise me single-handedly, I can raise the baby too."
The Caretaker stared at her Kai'lin, and then smiled. "You'll make a fine Caretaker one day, Op'Helia dear." She smiled in return. Lin'air gave her a soft kiss on the forehead, and then patted her on the shoulder. "You're comming to the Banquet tonight, aren't you?"
Ophelia looked up at her in shock. "Wh---what? You're still having the Banquet? I thought you would call it off sometime today. Do you really think any of the Elite Races will come?"
Lin'air chuckled and turned away. "Of course. Heavens, the Q's would find this an excellent time to play a few practical jokes on myself and Kathryn, due to our current predicament." Lin'air felt Ophelia haveing a jolt of guilt and shame inside of her. "But of course, I believe Commander Kim, Luke, and Danir will take care of our raucous friends. You know as well as I do that they wouldn't even dream of passing up a chance such as this. And as for the snickering from the other Races--- the Cyclorians, the Alkorians, the Mishk, Vennlianns and of course, the Caretakers . . . don't worry. I've got it all taken care of."
Ophelia smiled and nodded. "Thankyou Lin'air." Her Caretaker turned towards her and smiled. Lin'air stepped over to Ophelia and wrapped her in a warm embrace.
"Of course, dearie." She pulled away and smiled into Ophelia's beautiful features, fixing her blond hair that framed her face with her fingers. "I always take care of my Kai'lins, even when they don't like it."
Ophelia's smile faded a bit, but continued to humor Lin'air.


Tom Paris was bored. Really bored. He hadn't been this bored since Kathryn had locked him up in the brig for that whole month, and that had been . . . what? Six? Seven years ago? All the same, it had been a long time since he'd been in jail.
He was lying on his back in his bed (if you could really call it that) his head resting in his arms as he stared up at the ceiling. He really wasn't thinking of anything, he just allowed his mind, for the first time in a long time, to be blank from thoughts and worries. He had a lot to think about these past couple weeks . . . a little too much really. And now he allowed his mind to shut down for awhile from all the concerns and worries that were behind him, and lay ahead of him.
He heard the swish of the Brig doors as someone entered. It probably was Harry; he had told him this morning that he'd be back with the latest news of Op'Helia. It had to be about 1400 hours now, and Harry always came to talk to him now, when it was his lunch break.
"Hello Harry," he said lazily. When no reply issued, he turned his head to look at the opening of his cell, which was being bombarded with an active force field. He heard the steady clicks of heels . . . could it be Op'Helia? He bolted upright instantly and swung his legs over the side of his bench-like bed. The steady clicks continued at their unassuming rate, and Tom was getting ancy. It couldn't be Op'Helia . . . she wouldn't have waited this long to reach his cell. B'Ellana? The Prime Admiral? Lin'air? He shuddered at that last thought. He hoped it wasn't Lin'air.
And then a high chuckle echoed down the corridor, the clicks of someone's heels, her heels by the sound of the laughter, still grew louder as the woman was getting nearer. He saw the woman's shadow against the wall cast a long and blurry figure, and as the person edged nearer, her outline slowly came into focus against the gray wall. Tom's stomach dropped a foot. Oh please no, he thought as he shut his eyes and leaned against the cell wall, not her again. Anyone but her.
The wash of blue fabric and silver jewelry appeared as he opened his eyes, confirming his worst fears: Lin'air. She was wearing an annoyingly smug smile on her face and Tom scowled at her and rolled his eyes. Taking extreme care to be rude, he lay back down on his bed and said gruffly, "Go away."
Lin'air chuckled. "Nice to see you too. I knew you didn't want to see me . . . and that's why I came. When I walked in here and you realized it wasn't Harry, you thought for a moment it was Op'Helia, didn't you?" She was still wearing that nasty smile on her face when he looked at her. That was another thing he couldn't stand about Lin'air : he hated it when she read his thoughts.
If Lin'air had heard that thought in her keen telepathic mind, she chose to ignore it. She laughed again slightly and then said, "You'd have never seen her again if I had had my way. But then again, Kathryn can be rather convincing, can't she?"
Tom leaned up against the wall, peering at Lin'air curiously. "What do you mean?"
She ignored his question and struck him with another. "How do you like being a father, Tom?" He stared at her suspiciously. She was up to something, he knew it. She wanted something from him.
"No, I don't Tom. I don't want anything from you. I came to deliver a message to you. The Caretakian Court of Justice has passed your sentence, late last night. The Entourage came to my Court a little after 1900 hours yesterday. I think I owe it to you to deliver your sentence. If I hadn't spoken at your defense, you would have been dead already. Here." She produced a letter from the inside of her blue, blue robes. The force field shut off with buzz and Lin'air stepped inside. She extended Tom the letter. He just stared at it.
"Frightened?" she said, arching an eyebrow, "Indeed, I would be too if the Court of Justice had passed my Sentence of Resolution. Go ahead, take it. There's nothing you can do now but except your fate." She still extended the letter to him, and she was right, he admitted harshly to himself, he was afraid. He cursed himself inside for his fear. He took the letter, slowly and gingerly from Lin'air's hand, as though it might bite him. He opened the folded letter slowly, his stomach turning. Lin'air watched him read the letter.

To Thomas Eugene Paris,
The Court of Justice has considered your defence on Accusation 604 paragraph nine.
Your act of disobeying direct orders from your superior officers, Prime Admiral
Kathryn Janeway and former Caregiver Lin'air di la Vendiego Askara, has been
deemed punishable by death. According to the defenses made at your trial by your
Prime Admiral and former Caregiver,however, the Court has redeemed its decision
and sentenced you banishment for life in the Andromeda galaxy. You will dispatch
on stardate 2567/89 for the Andromeda galaxy. Your Caretaker Lin'air
will be the decision maker on your final leave time.

Court of Justice Headmaster,
Pamar Venn'Tek

There was a silence that ensued after Tom finished reading his sentence. Lin'air didn't say anything. She could already feel the wave of dread and shock that coursed through his system. He was angry; but most of all scared. He didn't know what to do, or say.
He continued staring at the letter, his mouth slightly open. Lin'air spoke first.
"I'm sorry Tom."
He looked up at her, with something that looked remarkably like hate. "You're sorry?" he said softly. He stood up. Lin'air backed up at step, for Tom was much taller than she. She stood her ground, however, a few feet away from him. He was angry before; now he was furious. He threw the paper aside and took anohter step forward, but Lin'air backed off, and stepping out of the cell she reactivated the force field. Tom stopped where he was. "You're not sorry . . . this is exactly what you wanted . . .isn't it? You wanted me to live with the knowledge that I could never see my friends again, Op'Helia or my child?" He paused for a moment, scrutinizing her. "You're disgusting. I don't see how you could ever consider yourself a Caregiver."
Those last words struck home in Lin'air's pride and she wanted to hit him where he stood, but the force field was in the way. She scowled and gritted her teeth. "You don't know the pains I've gone through for you, you stupid, arrogant human! If it weren't for me then you'd be dead right now."
"Better dead than this!"
"And what would Op'Helia think?" she teased, taking a step away from him, cocking her head so as to prove her superiority. "Op'Helia couldn't bare you dead, and you know that. And you wouldn't want to leave your child fatherless, now would you?" Tom didn't say anything, but continued to stare at Lin'air. She laughed. "You're right, I do prefer it this way. I would much have you alive, pining for your friends and family than have your child grow up hating me for killing you. I don't want blood on my hands, even those whom I hate."
"You see, Lin'air, thats one of your weaknesses. You allow yourself to hate too much. I haven't done anything to you, and yet you go----"
"I hate you because you are a worthless screw-up who can't do a thing right!" Lin'air yelled. "You don't love Op'Helia----"
"That's not true!"
"----oh . . . but it is! All you care about is yourself! You seduced her and you've got what you wanted! She's pregnant with your child and I'm allowing you to go gallavant in some galaxy . . . you should thank me. I'm doing you a favor."
"Y'know, for a Caretaker, you know surprisingly little about your people," Tom said sharply.
Lin'air scoffed. "Like I care what you think. You'll be deported the day after tomorrow. Goodbye Tom." Lin'air whirled around and walked away, the heels of her boots clicking rapidly as she headed for the exit. She heard Tom's voice echoing after her.
"At least allow me to say goodbye Op'Helia!"
The swish of the closing doors was his answer.