Chapter; The Pyre of Denethor - At the end of the chapter Gandalf takes Pippin with him towards the lower part of the city.

Some lines taken from "Return of the King".

Title: Finding Merry

Author: AngieT

Thanks to Maura for betaing.

For Pippin this was probably the worse part of the whole nightmare. Since Gandalf had set him upon Shadowfax and taken him from Merry's side nothing had seemed quite real - or maybe too real. Faramir, Denethor - it seemed like a separate life. All he longed for was Merry. To be back with his elder cousin, to have Merry explain stuff to him, to be able to slip back into his familiar role as Merry's shadow; partner in crime, co conspirator. He had seen too much, done too much. He wanted to be just himself, tweenage Pippin Took, Fool of a Took, Shire hobbit. They could have a drink or several together and sort through the whole thing, get it straight in his head.

But he could not find Merry!

The other hobbit had somehow got himself separated from Theoden's company. Pippin pushed his way through the tall bodies searching. He felt walled in by Big People and longed to see a familiar hobbit head. At last he was free of the crowd and found himself left behind. It was so hard to know where to look. Paths, which had been there before, were broken and blocked. The city had taken on a whole new aspect. In some parts he had to scramble over bits of rubble or skirt around still burning piles. There were also even more unpleasant areas to navigate.

Pippin wrapped the edge of his cloak up to cover the lower part of his face but still the acrid fumes stung his eyes. He made his way downwards, searching all the time. It was a nightmare! 'O, Merry. Where are you?' He needed Merry. Merry would tell him what to do. Merry always knew what to do, which Inns had the prettiest girls serving the best ale, all the shortcuts to mushrooms, when the Farmer would be at the other end of the fields. Merry had always been there for him, teaching him to ride his first pony, helping him learn his letters, getting him out of scrapes, always there to discuss problems.

At last from a little way off he saw a small figure. "Merry!"

There was no reaction; indeed the figure seemed to have little idea of his surroundings. The form paused now and again, staggered as though about to fall and generally gave the appearance of one walking in a dream.

"Merry!"

Pippin leapt over a pile of smouldering planks that had once probably been a part of some ones roof. He made as straight a path to his friend as he could and reached Merry's side just as the older hobbit stumbled again.

"Well, Merry! Thank goodness I have found you!"

They were face to face in a narrow lane, and but for themselves it was empty.

Merry rubbed at his eyes like a sleepwalker suddenly woken. He looked confusedly around him and then sagged as Pippin reached for him. He looked awful! His face was grey beneath the encrusted blood of a nosebleed. There were smudges of ash, cut through with tear tracks. He wore the unfamiliar uniform of Rohan. Pippin was having trouble reconciling this figure to his Cousin Merry. They grey eyes were unfocused, resting for a moment on Pip's face in seeming recognition before slipping away again as though seeing things the other hobbit could not.

'O, Merry,' Pip was as close to despair as he had ever been. Where was his stronger, older, wiser cousin so he could lay down all his burdens? He was only little Pippin. He needed Merry! He felt an urge to cry.

Where was Gandalf, or one of the others? He could not do this by himself.

For a moment Merry seemed to focus again on Pippin's face and Pippin smiled in hope but Merry's next words froze him.

"Are you going to bury me?" said Merry in a changed voice unlike his own.

"No, indeed!" Pippin's voice was heading higher in hysterics and then he suddenly realised. There was no one to help him now; no going back, the war had changed them all. He could not seek to lay down his burdens on Merry's shoulders. He was going to have to save Merry. He took his cousin by the arm. "No, we are going to the Houses of Healing."

end