I see him walking across the street and I turn my head hoping he will not see me and carry on walking as it is he already has and stops in front of the shop.
He talks about the neck-ties me and my uncle are now selling but I'm not really listening, I'm trying to keep my emotions in tact although it is so hard having him standing so close, teasing me.
'I'd like to buy one' He said and I heard that, I turned around to see him smile at me and hand me the one he has chosen, I take it and place it in a box. He shuffles himself closer and looks into my eyes.
'You did not have to leave Denise' he says directly
'I Did not want to remain' I said and turned my head
He steps closer, forcing me to turn my head back around to look into his chocolate brown eyes.
'Will you come back to me?' he asks pleading I'd love nothing more than to be with him, but I now know that is not going to happen.
'No Sir, Not now' I said
'Suppose I would employ you?' he asked
'And why would you do that?' I asked knowing the answer already
'Because you are my little champion' he said and smiled once more
I roll my eyes, I then look at him, stare right into him, hoping that once I have said my piece he will realise what i'm saying and how much he had hurt me.
'You let me make a fool of myself, You let me kiss you when you are engaged to be married, You let me say those things' I said trying to control my tears that are threatening to fall.
'I had my reasons, I have my reasons for Catherine, It all happened so.. So Suddenly. I cannot find a way to undo this Denise... When You kissed me...'
I couldn't let him continue
'You are to marry Catherine Glendenning and that is all that matters' I told him forcefully
'Yes... And I'm Sorry, That matters too' he whispered back.
I look into his eyes once more and I know he is indeed sorry, I also see vulnerability in his eyes, which make me sniff myself holding back my own tears.
'Denise, Will you meet with me tonight, I think I need to explain my reasons to you, I need for you to see why' He said and stepped so close to me I could smell his sweet cologne, I watched his soft lips move and I lost myself in his beautiful eyes.
I hesitated and realised the tears I had desperately tried to hide where running down my face. I felt his thumb wipe them away
'Don't cry, please let me explain' Moray said quietly
I Just nodded my head
'Meet me around the corner at dusk, bring a lamp' he said and smiled.
I heard my uncles voice and Moray quickly stood away from me. He fished some money out of his pocket and gave it to me, in exchange for the neck-tie. I quickly wiped away my remaining tears and turned around to see my Uncle.
'Mr. Moray was just buying one of our neck-ties uncle' I told him I then heard Moray step towards my uncle and start to apologize to him, yet again I zoned out for a few minutes thinking about what had just happened and why had I agreed to meet with the man I craved alone in the dark. I knew he would never hurt me not like that anyway but I still feel so stupid for letting him get to me.
I saw him straight away this time. I stood at the corner of Tallgate street, holding a lamp, and wishing I had put my coat on instead of the cloak as it was freezing. He walked up to me and to my surprise he was holding a picnic basket and a lamp himself.
'Come on' he said and I followed him out of the street.
We walked together in silence in till we reached the other side of the bridge,he pulled out a blanket from the basket and laid it on the cold grass, he then set the lamp down and took mine from me hand.
I looked at him, as if he was mad.
'Sit down' he said and beckoned me to sit on the blanket besides him .he pulled out a bottle of wine and some grapes and poured me a glass, as he handed it our hands brushed together and I shivered .
'Cold?' he asked
I nodded to disguise that fact that it was not the cold weather that had made me shiver. He took of his coat and wrapped it around my shoulders
'Denise, I invited you here to explain why I have to marry Catherine, The Glendennings have ownership of The Paradise and soon Lord Glendenning will be loaning me the money to buy the leases for the whole street. This is why I have to Marry Catherine, if I don't I will never get the loan I need to expand, and ill be in serve Debt to them, do you see Denise?' Moray asked me
'Ownership of The Paradise I don't understand I thought you owned The Paradise?' I asked confused
'I do but they loaned me the money in the first place, if I withdraw from the promise I made Catherine Lord Glendenning could and would take that loan back and I would not have the funds to continue paying the rent of The Paradise let alone trying to buy the rest of the leases. I'm so sorry Denise, I wish things where different, I do so much, I don't think you understand how much I want to be with you Denise, I just cant' He finished tears leaking from his eyes now.
'I understand I do' I said and gave him a small smile. But inside I felt cut in two. I couldn't let him loose everything for me and now I knew he wouldn't sacrifice his beloved Paradise for me either. But I could see the love in his eyes.
He pulled me into his arms and I rested my head on his chest, feeling his steady heart beat, I felt his arms around me and his hands running up and down my own arms, comforting me and warming me too. We stayed like that for a while in till it got late.
Moray packed the food and wine up and got to his feet, taking my hand into his. I clutched his hand tight as we walked back, knowing I will never feel this again.
Just before we reached the corner Moray stopped walking and pushed me up against the wall.
I looked at him once again confused, he put the basket down and placed one of his hands on my waist underneath the coat I still had around me, he then pressed his other hand to my cheek and stared deeply into my eyes.
'I don't think I can live without you in my life Denise, Please may we do this again, just have talk, hold each other from time to time, will you comfort me sweetheart?' he asked Causing my heart to beat faster once hearing the name he called me
'Call me that again' I whispered
'Sweetheart' he said and kissed my lips
'Sweetheart' and kissed my lips deeper this time, he once again pulled away
'Sweetheart' he said and pushed his tongue deep into my mouth and this time he did not pull away, I felt his long silky tongue exploring my mouth, his hand on my head and waist pulling my body closer to him in till I could feel his arousal against my body. I sighed when he pulled away and started nibbling my neck in Ernest.
He pulled back
'Sweetheart' he said and gave my lips once last peck.
'Its late' he whispered with his husky voice. He pulled me into his arms for a hug and then picked up the basket and we walked back into Tallgate street.
Once outside my Uncles shop I gave him his coat back and he squeezed my hand, I then watched him walk away from me.
2 days later I received a note
'Denise, I cannot marry Catherine, I have decided that my love for you is too strong, meet me at the bridge John xxx'
I smiled
