WELL, recently I've been getting re-obsessed with IZ and more importantly, IZ fandom and ZADR, so I decided to make this. I couldn't really find a story that seemed to fit my particular ZADR. For whatever reason, I hate OCs in this series(but the one I made is necessary for the plot, and will be exterminated quickly!), and I don't like it whenever the Tallest come and ruin everything. Plus, I think people make either Zim or Dib to OOC or girly. My expectations for this story are low, just so your warned. I want to try to develop my writing skills and challenge myself with this. It just seems hard and different opposed to my normal pairings I write about. Looking forward to GIRness. Probably alot of fluff and angst. Rated T, cuz writing sexual intercourse freaks me out, cuz I really don't need to know. But it will be implied. ^_^ This story is, strangely enough, inspired by the VOCALOID song Two Breaths Walking. :)
DISCLAIMER: SADLY, I DO NOT OWN INVADER ZIM! ITS AMAZING, SO WHO WOULDN'T WANT TO? :/
Chapter One
This Is Page One Of My Evolution
Riiing. Riiiing. RIIIING. I SAID, RIIIINNN-
"Ugghhh." I groaned, reaching over to silence my alarm. After a few moments of talking myself into getting out of bed, I managed to slip out from underneath the blissfully warm covers and onto the cold floor.
I yawned and ran a hand through my messy black hair, whilst heading out of my room. My eyes were groggy, and it was still hard to really understand much of what was going on.
"Dib." A familiar voice said in a bored tone. I lazily looked over my shoulder at my little sister. She'd grown up pretty quickly. Almost fifteen, and already looked like a woman. Sort of. She still always had her head in a video game and was as cynical as ever. I guess I can't complain, I haven't changed either.
I'm still obsessed with the paranormal and all that alien business. Maybe even a bit more. I have pajamas with UFOs on them. That I was currently wearing at the moment my demonic sister greeted me.
"Gaz." I said suspiciously. She raised a brow at me and my pajamas, before returning her attention back to her video game, and disappearing downstairs. With a sigh, I followed her into the living room.
This is usually how mornings in the summer began. I woke up, watched TV, fought with Zim for a few hours, maybe save Earth, and then finish with a little more TV.
Who's Zim, you ask? Don't get me started. Zim is the most foulest, ugliest, most annoying thing ever in the existence of everything ever. He's my biggest rival and has also been an obsession of mine since I was eleven years old. He's an obsession, because he's my proof. He's an alien.
Discovering this was a simple task. His disguises are extremely weak and he isn't the brightest star in the sky. But, he is smarter then most of the human race. So, he is a formidable challenger and rival. He infiltrated skool as a normal kid, and no one has ever suspected a thing.
The only ones who really know are Gaz and I. But no matter how hard I try to out him, no one ever, EVER, seems to believe me.
I grumbled lightly under my breath.
"Stop sulking, loser. You do it everyday and it's starting to piss me off." I glared over at my freakish little sister.
"I'm not sulking! I- I'm planning!"
"Planning?"
"Y-yeah, for whenever Zim attacks-"
"Don't wanna know."
I looked back at the TV, feeling annoyed with my stupid sister. I don't even know what we were watching, I was just zoning out. It was one of those hot mornings that you just don't care.
"Well, I'm leaving this area." Gaz said suddenly, snapping me out of whatever trance I was under.
"Whatever." I murmured, sinking further into the couch.
Ding~Dong!
I raised a brow and leapt up from the couch. Answering the door I was met with the sight of a bearded
-greenskinned- pizza delivery man. Oh my god. Really?
"Hello, earth sti- I mean, valued customer sir man lady." My eye twitched. Did Zim seriously think I wouldn't know it was him?
"Did you order, this deliciously delicious human pizza food?" The alien asked in a hardly disguised voice. I almost laughed out loud right there. Zim really was getting stupider...
"No, I can't say that I did." I said, trying hard not to laugh at the pathetic Alien's attempt to confuse me. He stroked his long white beard in thought, then gave me a once over. "Well you look like a skinny young lad who could use some pizza on his bones." He pushed the pizza box into my hands.
"I'll be going now, to make another pizza and do other...pizza..things...BYE!" And then the "pizza delivery man" was gone.
I chuckled, examining the pizza box. Zim probably put an explosive pizza topping on it, so that once you ate it it exploded in your mouth.
I brought the pizza inside and placed it down on the table so I could examine it better. Stupid aliens. Zim's little plan was definitely not going to-
Ding~Dong!
Now who was it? Probably Zim again. He really was pathetic. With a spring in my step, I shuffled over to the door. I was more then happy to point out to the Alien how horrible his disguise was this time. I opened the door and was surprised to see Zim's little..alien dog, robot, thing. GIR?
"HI BIG HEAD!" It screeched loudly, blue eyes sparkling up at me.
"Um, hi, Zim's robot dog creature?"
"Meow!" The robot chirpped happily. There was an awkward silence before I spoke again.
"So...? Why are you here, GIR?"
"Yes."
"Yes? Yes what?"
"Yeeessss, BIG HEAD."
I stared at him, now a bit scared. His-it's- blue eyes were looking up at me all wide and unblinkingly. The big head comment, I had gotten used to. I mean I couldn't really go a day without hearing it. But, it was still a soft spot.
"My head isn't that big..." Then GIR let out a horrible screeching. He seemed to be crying. The robot dog tackled me to the ground, wailing in my ear and punching my chest. "YOUR HEAD IS BIG! IT ISSS! IT ISSSS!"
I was alarmed. Extremely alarmed.
"Mwahahahahaha! Foolish worm-baby DIB!" I heard someone cackled as they stepped over me and the flailing GIR. Zim. The green skinned Alien stepped over me easily, into my home. He had grown since he first arrived on Earth. He was still a good bit shorter than I, but it wasn't so bothersome. I had grown considerably taller since I was eleven, but that was normal for a human.
Zim's height was around Gaz's, which meant it wasn't uncomfortable when we were having screaming matches. I didn't know Aliens could grow?
I had to admit his normal human disguise wasn't as bad as before. His wig included alot more hair and was spiked perfectly. He still didn't have a nose or ears. And his skin was green. But the hair was a start.
"Zim!" I gasped angrily. He smirked down at me, an evil glint in his eyes. GIR was still on top of me freaking out. He was heavier then expected. I tried to get him off me, but he wailed even louder and began thrashing around. Zim then proceeded up the stairs.
I stared after him in shock. What was that alien doing? "GIR, GET OFF ME!" I screamed over his crying. GIR responded by smashing my head into the floor. "BIG HEAD!" He cried.
Fed up, I muttered, "Fine, my head is big." GIR froze. I cocked a brow. Did I fix it? Then, he licked me with his metal, yet human-like tongue. "You taste like TV." GIR sang happily.
"Thank you GIR?" I asked, unsurely. He just grinned stupidly at me as I pushed him off. I had to find out what Zim was up to in my house. THE NERVE!
"ZIM!" I yelled, running up the stairs the same way Zim had gone. GIR skipped along after me.
"Where did he go...?" I asked myself darkly, inspecting the second floor of my home.
"TOILET!" GIR shrieked, but I paid him no attention. I cautiously opened the door to my bedroom, and peeked inside. Zim sat triumphantly on the bed, with a syringe in his left hand. "Oh, hello Dib-stink."
"Zim, what did you do?" I growled, stomping into my room, GIR at my heels meowing. Zim's smirk became a full out grin.
"Oh, Zim only ensured the event that is celebrated highly and known only as THE DEATH OF DIB-WORM!" GIR whistled. "I made TEH CUPCAKES!"
I glared at the disgusting creature sitting on my bed with intense hate. This only seemed to make him happier. I was about to declare my undying hate of the foul thing, before the doorbell rang a third time.
"DIB! GET THE DOOR!" Gaz called out from somewhere in the house.
"But, I-"
"GET THE DAMNED DOOR YOU FILTHY COCKROACH!"
I sighed in defeat. "I'll be right back, Zim." I turned on my heels and sprinted for the door.
"H-HEY! DIB-STINK! ZIM IS NOT DONE KILLING YOU YET!" I heard the alien chase after me noisily. I threw open the front door.
"Yo." Said a tall silver haired guy. I'd seen him before in Hi Skool. What was his name again? I looked at him suspiciously. "Um...?"
"Sven." He said with his deep voice. Why was he telling me this? I had an alien to deal with, I didn't have time to deal with this guy.
"What do you want SVEN?" I asked, trying not to glare at him for interrupting me. I could hear Zim thrashing about upstairs.
"You." He murmured.
...
"Huh?" I asked, confused. "Oh no, not another one..."
"Dib, I've been in love with you for-"
"Listen, I'm not g-"
"DIB-WORM! ZIM DEMANDS YOU PAY ATTENTION TO HIM AS HE DESTROYS YOUR SILLY EXISTENCE!" I sweatdropped.
Sven's eyes narrowed. "Is that green boy here? Weren't you going to say your not gay?"
Zim had now found me at the door, and was starting towards me.
"I'm not! Zim just barged in here with a syringe!"
"Heh." Sven chuckled darkly. "I should have known. Your in love with the creepy guy with the skin condition."
I felt the blood rush to my face. How dare he insinuate I had feelings for that...that...THING!
"WHY WOULD ANYONE LOVE ZIM! HE'S A WALKING ABOMINATION!" I yelled suddenly, surprising Sven. Zim was now watching curiously.
Sven shook his head. "Sure, deny it. Everyone at Skool knows it's true. You two are always together. I just thought-"
"I HATE ZIM! I HAVE NEVER LOVED HIM! I DO NOT CURRENTLY LOVE HIM, NOR WILL I EVER!" And, with that, I shut the door in the annoying boy's face. Zim raised a brow at me.
"Who was that, filthy human grease boy?" He asked.
I frowned. I was still pretty ticked. It seemed like almost everyday some random gay guy would confess his love to me. Why did people think I was gay? Sure, I didn't take much interest in girls, but I didn't take any interest in guys either.
I was too busy trying to save earth from crazy aliens all the while expose ZIM for what he really was.
"I don't know. Just some kid from school." I replied after a while.
"Dib-stink, Zim wants to know what this LOVE thing the grease boy spoke of." I blinked. What?
"Zim, you've been living on Earth for five years and you don't know what love is?"
Zim looked uncomfortable, and shifted nervously. "Zim knows what it means, I just want to know if you know." I gave him a look. Obviously, he didn't know what it meant.
"I'm not going to talk about this with the likes of you. I can't believe you don't know what love is. I mean, you know what hate is."
"AHA! SO LOVE AND HATE ARE EQUIVALENT?" Zim guessed, suddenly perky again. I shook my head, smiling a bit. He really could be an idiot.
"Sure." I laughed.
"THEN I, THE ALMIGHTY ZIM, LOVE YOU, THE PATHETIC WORM BABY DIB TO THE DEPTHS OF THE DEEPEST PLANET CORE!"
I bursted out laughing once he said this. I fell to the ground, clutching at my stomach. This was too good. Zim smiled triumphantly at me.
"SO, this word LOVE, causes you great discomfort and stomach pains? Is it that offensive to the human race?" Zim inquired. "I must remember to tell you how much I love you more often."
"LUUUURRRVVVEEEE!" GIR called, glomping Zim's leg.
I was still on the ground, dying of laughter. I can't believe he actually said that! What a stupid alien!
"I am off then, Dibbed-one. I hope the Schmizzums I planted in your pillows devour your brains as you sleep tonight!" Zim said in a cheerful tone, as he left the Membrane household.
This sentence had sucessfully stopped my laughter. He put WHAT in my pillows?
TBC
SOOO, whaddaya think? :3 Should I continue it, then? IDK if I should. Depends on reviews and such~ Sorry it's so short I just don't wanna go to far with it for now until I know it will be liked!