Disclaimer: I don't own AFI or X-files, just the story idea. I'm not rich enough for anything else.
A/n: I'm not going to say much, because this piece is pretty much self-explanatory. I don't want to ruin the effect, so I'll just say this -
It hit as I was listening to this song by AFI (A Fire Inside). Just this image near the end, of Scully crying and praying beneath-
Won't ruin it for ya. Please Read and Review, thank you. This one's dedicated to Dream Dragon and Willowwing especially, because of their support of me and my work and Willowwing's never-ending tolerance of my obsession with this show. Hey, when you gotta write, you gotta write. Right?
Silver and Cold by Dreamseeker1
Scully awoke brightly on Sunday, a little earlier than usual. She put on a nice business suit and combed back her hair and drove away from her apartment in Georgetown, watching the sun rise. As it rose over the Potomac, she pulled into the parking garage of the FBI building and got in the empty elevator. She yawned as it slowly rose through the floors. She flicked her red hair back behind one ear as the doors opened. When she looked up, the door to the X-Files office was already opened. Her eyebrows furrowed and she stepped briskly into the office. A man hunched behind a desk, and she released her breath.
"Mulder, what in god's name are you doing here? It's-" She checked her watch. "Six-thirty on a Sunday morning."
He looked up, his dark hair a mess, and smiled. "I could ask you the same question. Don't you have to go to church or prison or something?"
She gave him a pursed look. "I came in to pick up some paperwork before I go. And it's chapel, Mulder."
"Chapel, prison ward, same thing." He bent back toward his desk. "Want a donut?" He waved to a package next to him.
"No thanks." Scully shook her head.
Mulder looked up and gave her a clear view of his face. Powdered sugar ringed his mouth. "You sure?"
Scully laughed, putting her hands up to her mouth to hold back from laughing any more. "No Mulder, I'm fine." She walked over to her own desk, still chuckling, and pulled an envelope from the top drawer. "What're you doing here, anyway?"
"What I do every Sunday. Filing X-Files." He smirked. "I guess you could call it my religious worship."
Scully shook her head sadly. "I pity the state of your soul sometimes, you know that?" She put the envelope in her briefcase.
He laughed. "Then pray for me or something. Whatever you do in that situation."
She smiled and walked over to him. "I will. I need to go. See you tomorrow?"
He nodded and looked up into her blue eyes once more. "Yep. Bright and early."
She left the office quietly, thinking about her partner. Mulder had never believed in anything but the X-Files as far as she knew. What state was his soul in?
I
I came here today
And I left here in darkness, and found you
Found you on the way
Quietly, she drove her car away from her workplace, turning on the wipers of her car as it started to snow heavily. The quiet and the snow calmed her, turned her thoughts inward.
And now
It is silver and silent,
It is silver and cold;
You went somber asplendence
She pulled into the parking lot of the cathedral and scurried up the steps, greeting Father McCoy as she walked to her normal pew in the back. A father began the sermon, and she bowed her head in prayer.
What did she have to pray for? Her family was well, work was going fine, and she had no problems of her own. So she thanked God for the beauty of the snow, the calmness of the day.
Father McCoy was suddenly at her side. "Pray for him," he said.
She blinked. "What?"
He smiled. "Justin Johnston. He got in a car accident. Please Dana, pray for him."
She exhaled deeply, smiling. "Of course." He walked away to another family with a young child in their arms.
Scully looked at her church, with it's familiar high ceilings, candles, incense, robed priests, and her beloved stained glass windows. Jesus had his arms outstretched to the lambs… To the Christians in the room. His loving Catholics. Scully loved the image, but bowed her head for the poor boy.
But her mind kept wandering away from the boy. Away from one and to another.
"Love thy neighbor, said the Lord, and so we must. Our neighbor now is a young boy who is fighting for life after an accident. Let us pray for his life and health. Please bow your heads."
Hands clasped as one and Father McCoy led a prayer. But Dana Scully prayed for someone else. She bowed her head, clasped her hands tightly, and prayed for Mulder.
"Heavenly Father, I don't know what plan you have for Fox Mulder, or why you have caused him to suffer so, but I ask of you now to forgive him of his sins and spare his soul, please. My partner has a good heart, better than most. Please, please forgive him." Her hands clasped tighter and her knuckles went white.
Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one
Your sins into me
Every wondrous voice escapes our trembling prayer,
And I beg for forgiveness
Your sins into me
Your sins into me
Oh my beautiful one…
"Oh Mulder…" she thought. "Mulder, you need something to believe in. You need to learn the meaning of faith. You've taught me so much, shown me so much these past few years.
"You've taught me how to live again."
Life
Like the flutter of wings
Feel your hollow bones rushing,
Into me, as you're longing to see….
"Can't you just let go awhile? Just, relax, take a break, forget about it all until you've learned how to live too? I know how bad you want to know, but Mulder, wanting to see something doesn't make it the truth.
"And the truth is what you need."
So I
I will paint you in silver
I will wrap you in cold
I will lift up our voices, I said:
Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one now
Your sins into me
As your rapturous voice escapes our trembling prayer,
And I beg for forgiveness
Your sins into me
Your sins into me
The cathedral was filled with song as Scully squeezed her eyes tight, praying for Mulder. For some reason, it was today that he worried her - that she feared for his soul. She shivered as she thought of Mulder's body writhing in pain, burning in the eternity of hell. Her hands and eyes squeezed tighter. "No," she thought. "I won't let it come to that."
The church went dead silent. Scully opened her eyes and they widened in surprise.
The church was empty. It was as if time had stopped.
She stood in her pew, looking around. "Hello?" It echoed through the chapel.
She tried again. "Hello? Is there anyone there?" She closed her eyes as shivers ran through her spine. "What's going on? Father McCoy? Hello?"
Biting her lip, she left the pew and walked toward the door. Perhaps she had fallen asleep, and Father McCoy had left her there? She reached the door and tried to pull it open.
It was locked.
She pulled on it again, harder this time. Nothing happened. Freezing blasts of air were coming in through the cracks. When she saw no locks on the door, she backed away silently. Maybe it was all a dream.
She turned around and froze.
(Cold in life's throw)
I fell asleep for you
(Cold in life's throw)
I only ask you turn away
(Cold in life's throw)
I fell asleep for you
(Cold in life's throw)
I only ask you turn
As you seep, into me
Oh my beautiful one
The stained glass behind the altar - the huge mosaic representation of Christ- was no longer just a representation. It seemed alive.
The colors shined as though there were lights behind them, shining individually - each as bright as the sun. She shaded her eyes. Risking the look up, her eyes met those of Christ, and tears ran down her face in awe at the feelings it evoked. She had never felt so many emotions at once, nor had she ever felt anything so strongly. She hit her knees. It was like "the missing piece" that everyone had so long sought for, like -
Like Mulder and the X-files.
Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one
Your sins into me now
As your rapturous voice escapes our trembling prayer,
And I beg for forgiveness
Your sins into me
Your sins into me
She grasped her hands together again. "Save him, Jesus. Save him, Lord. He doesn't deserve the pain he lives in, doesn't deserve pain for eternity. Help him; save him. Though he walks astray he is full of all the light in the universe. Of those who walk on faith none walk as straight as Mulder. No one can claim to walk blindly - to believe- like Mulder. Circle this world and you will find no other like him, with his devotion and his determination.
"If only I could be more like Mulder."
Tears poured down her face as she grasped her hands together in prayer under the beauty of the Lord. "Mulder," she thought. "I pray for Mulder."
Silent sobs racked her chest in a way she had never felt before. "Heavenly Father, please, forgive him of his sins in this world. Please… I have done all I can. It's you Mulder needs now."
Her forehead touched her hands clasped in prayer as her tears began to subside. The stained-glass shined brighter, brighter, until the world around Dana was a brilliant white. Her shut eyes winced in pain.
Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one now
Your sins into me
As your rapturous voice escapes our trembling prayer,
And I beg for forgiveness
Your sins into me
Your sins into-
She heard sound. Opening her eyes, she saw the congregation leaving, filing out of the pews. She was back in her pew in the back, and Father McCoy's hand was on her shoulder.
"Dana, are you all right? You were crying during the sermon."
She looked at him, blue eyes wide. Had she been in that pew the whole time? "Father, I…" Her eyes searched his. How did one explain the beauty of what she had seen? "I've been thinking about Mulder, Father."
"Ah. I see. The Lord works in mysterious ways. He will save the good people, if they recognize Him."
Scully looked down, mumbling. "It will take an angel to save Mulder."
Father McCoy raised her chin. "Be his angel, Dana. Let the Lord work through you."
Dana stood and embraced him. "Thank you, Father." She wiped her eyes and cleared her throat. "I'll see you next Sunday, then?"
He smiled. "I'm always here, my dear."
She got in her car quietly and drove home, thinking about her- her - what would one call it? Her vision?
Whatever it was, it didn't matter. Mulder's soul would be prayed for.
She was shocked to see him sitting on the steps of her apartment building. "Mulder?" she called through her window. "What are you doing here?"
He smiled. "I thought maybe you would come get some brunch with me? I'm done filing… Or should I say praying?" Scully's face went white. "What's wrong with you? You look like you've seen a ghost."
She shook her head and smiled. "I'd be happy to go eat. Where to?"
"I know a diner not far from here…"
He got in his car and led the way, Scully watching him as though she'd never seen him before… or she'd never see him again. She flipped on the radio to clear her mind and was surprised to hear the song coming from the speakers - the song that was the moment itself-
"Your sins into me
Your sins into me
Oh my beautiful one…"
A/n: I'm not going to say much, because this piece is pretty much self-explanatory. I don't want to ruin the effect, so I'll just say this -
It hit as I was listening to this song by AFI (A Fire Inside). Just this image near the end, of Scully crying and praying beneath-
Won't ruin it for ya. Please Read and Review, thank you. This one's dedicated to Dream Dragon and Willowwing especially, because of their support of me and my work and Willowwing's never-ending tolerance of my obsession with this show. Hey, when you gotta write, you gotta write. Right?
Silver and Cold by Dreamseeker1
Scully awoke brightly on Sunday, a little earlier than usual. She put on a nice business suit and combed back her hair and drove away from her apartment in Georgetown, watching the sun rise. As it rose over the Potomac, she pulled into the parking garage of the FBI building and got in the empty elevator. She yawned as it slowly rose through the floors. She flicked her red hair back behind one ear as the doors opened. When she looked up, the door to the X-Files office was already opened. Her eyebrows furrowed and she stepped briskly into the office. A man hunched behind a desk, and she released her breath.
"Mulder, what in god's name are you doing here? It's-" She checked her watch. "Six-thirty on a Sunday morning."
He looked up, his dark hair a mess, and smiled. "I could ask you the same question. Don't you have to go to church or prison or something?"
She gave him a pursed look. "I came in to pick up some paperwork before I go. And it's chapel, Mulder."
"Chapel, prison ward, same thing." He bent back toward his desk. "Want a donut?" He waved to a package next to him.
"No thanks." Scully shook her head.
Mulder looked up and gave her a clear view of his face. Powdered sugar ringed his mouth. "You sure?"
Scully laughed, putting her hands up to her mouth to hold back from laughing any more. "No Mulder, I'm fine." She walked over to her own desk, still chuckling, and pulled an envelope from the top drawer. "What're you doing here, anyway?"
"What I do every Sunday. Filing X-Files." He smirked. "I guess you could call it my religious worship."
Scully shook her head sadly. "I pity the state of your soul sometimes, you know that?" She put the envelope in her briefcase.
He laughed. "Then pray for me or something. Whatever you do in that situation."
She smiled and walked over to him. "I will. I need to go. See you tomorrow?"
He nodded and looked up into her blue eyes once more. "Yep. Bright and early."
She left the office quietly, thinking about her partner. Mulder had never believed in anything but the X-Files as far as she knew. What state was his soul in?
I
I came here today
And I left here in darkness, and found you
Found you on the way
Quietly, she drove her car away from her workplace, turning on the wipers of her car as it started to snow heavily. The quiet and the snow calmed her, turned her thoughts inward.
And now
It is silver and silent,
It is silver and cold;
You went somber asplendence
She pulled into the parking lot of the cathedral and scurried up the steps, greeting Father McCoy as she walked to her normal pew in the back. A father began the sermon, and she bowed her head in prayer.
What did she have to pray for? Her family was well, work was going fine, and she had no problems of her own. So she thanked God for the beauty of the snow, the calmness of the day.
Father McCoy was suddenly at her side. "Pray for him," he said.
She blinked. "What?"
He smiled. "Justin Johnston. He got in a car accident. Please Dana, pray for him."
She exhaled deeply, smiling. "Of course." He walked away to another family with a young child in their arms.
Scully looked at her church, with it's familiar high ceilings, candles, incense, robed priests, and her beloved stained glass windows. Jesus had his arms outstretched to the lambs… To the Christians in the room. His loving Catholics. Scully loved the image, but bowed her head for the poor boy.
But her mind kept wandering away from the boy. Away from one and to another.
"Love thy neighbor, said the Lord, and so we must. Our neighbor now is a young boy who is fighting for life after an accident. Let us pray for his life and health. Please bow your heads."
Hands clasped as one and Father McCoy led a prayer. But Dana Scully prayed for someone else. She bowed her head, clasped her hands tightly, and prayed for Mulder.
"Heavenly Father, I don't know what plan you have for Fox Mulder, or why you have caused him to suffer so, but I ask of you now to forgive him of his sins and spare his soul, please. My partner has a good heart, better than most. Please, please forgive him." Her hands clasped tighter and her knuckles went white.
Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one
Your sins into me
Every wondrous voice escapes our trembling prayer,
And I beg for forgiveness
Your sins into me
Your sins into me
Oh my beautiful one…
"Oh Mulder…" she thought. "Mulder, you need something to believe in. You need to learn the meaning of faith. You've taught me so much, shown me so much these past few years.
"You've taught me how to live again."
Life
Like the flutter of wings
Feel your hollow bones rushing,
Into me, as you're longing to see….
"Can't you just let go awhile? Just, relax, take a break, forget about it all until you've learned how to live too? I know how bad you want to know, but Mulder, wanting to see something doesn't make it the truth.
"And the truth is what you need."
So I
I will paint you in silver
I will wrap you in cold
I will lift up our voices, I said:
Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one now
Your sins into me
As your rapturous voice escapes our trembling prayer,
And I beg for forgiveness
Your sins into me
Your sins into me
The cathedral was filled with song as Scully squeezed her eyes tight, praying for Mulder. For some reason, it was today that he worried her - that she feared for his soul. She shivered as she thought of Mulder's body writhing in pain, burning in the eternity of hell. Her hands and eyes squeezed tighter. "No," she thought. "I won't let it come to that."
The church went dead silent. Scully opened her eyes and they widened in surprise.
The church was empty. It was as if time had stopped.
She stood in her pew, looking around. "Hello?" It echoed through the chapel.
She tried again. "Hello? Is there anyone there?" She closed her eyes as shivers ran through her spine. "What's going on? Father McCoy? Hello?"
Biting her lip, she left the pew and walked toward the door. Perhaps she had fallen asleep, and Father McCoy had left her there? She reached the door and tried to pull it open.
It was locked.
She pulled on it again, harder this time. Nothing happened. Freezing blasts of air were coming in through the cracks. When she saw no locks on the door, she backed away silently. Maybe it was all a dream.
She turned around and froze.
(Cold in life's throw)
I fell asleep for you
(Cold in life's throw)
I only ask you turn away
(Cold in life's throw)
I fell asleep for you
(Cold in life's throw)
I only ask you turn
As you seep, into me
Oh my beautiful one
The stained glass behind the altar - the huge mosaic representation of Christ- was no longer just a representation. It seemed alive.
The colors shined as though there were lights behind them, shining individually - each as bright as the sun. She shaded her eyes. Risking the look up, her eyes met those of Christ, and tears ran down her face in awe at the feelings it evoked. She had never felt so many emotions at once, nor had she ever felt anything so strongly. She hit her knees. It was like "the missing piece" that everyone had so long sought for, like -
Like Mulder and the X-files.
Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one
Your sins into me now
As your rapturous voice escapes our trembling prayer,
And I beg for forgiveness
Your sins into me
Your sins into me
She grasped her hands together again. "Save him, Jesus. Save him, Lord. He doesn't deserve the pain he lives in, doesn't deserve pain for eternity. Help him; save him. Though he walks astray he is full of all the light in the universe. Of those who walk on faith none walk as straight as Mulder. No one can claim to walk blindly - to believe- like Mulder. Circle this world and you will find no other like him, with his devotion and his determination.
"If only I could be more like Mulder."
Tears poured down her face as she grasped her hands together in prayer under the beauty of the Lord. "Mulder," she thought. "I pray for Mulder."
Silent sobs racked her chest in a way she had never felt before. "Heavenly Father, please, forgive him of his sins in this world. Please… I have done all I can. It's you Mulder needs now."
Her forehead touched her hands clasped in prayer as her tears began to subside. The stained-glass shined brighter, brighter, until the world around Dana was a brilliant white. Her shut eyes winced in pain.
Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one now
Your sins into me
As your rapturous voice escapes our trembling prayer,
And I beg for forgiveness
Your sins into me
Your sins into-
She heard sound. Opening her eyes, she saw the congregation leaving, filing out of the pews. She was back in her pew in the back, and Father McCoy's hand was on her shoulder.
"Dana, are you all right? You were crying during the sermon."
She looked at him, blue eyes wide. Had she been in that pew the whole time? "Father, I…" Her eyes searched his. How did one explain the beauty of what she had seen? "I've been thinking about Mulder, Father."
"Ah. I see. The Lord works in mysterious ways. He will save the good people, if they recognize Him."
Scully looked down, mumbling. "It will take an angel to save Mulder."
Father McCoy raised her chin. "Be his angel, Dana. Let the Lord work through you."
Dana stood and embraced him. "Thank you, Father." She wiped her eyes and cleared her throat. "I'll see you next Sunday, then?"
He smiled. "I'm always here, my dear."
She got in her car quietly and drove home, thinking about her- her - what would one call it? Her vision?
Whatever it was, it didn't matter. Mulder's soul would be prayed for.
She was shocked to see him sitting on the steps of her apartment building. "Mulder?" she called through her window. "What are you doing here?"
He smiled. "I thought maybe you would come get some brunch with me? I'm done filing… Or should I say praying?" Scully's face went white. "What's wrong with you? You look like you've seen a ghost."
She shook her head and smiled. "I'd be happy to go eat. Where to?"
"I know a diner not far from here…"
He got in his car and led the way, Scully watching him as though she'd never seen him before… or she'd never see him again. She flipped on the radio to clear her mind and was surprised to hear the song coming from the speakers - the song that was the moment itself-
"Your sins into me
Your sins into me
Oh my beautiful one…"