Shrugging on his jacket, Rafael picked up his briefcase and followed Olivia out of his office, switching off the lights as he went. The two walked purposefully towards the bank of elevators at the far end of the corridor. She'd forgone her jacket, choosing instead to carry it over her arm. It was late May and the city was experiencing a mini-heatwave, making it feel more like mid-July.
"So, what do you fancy?" Rafael asked, pressing the call button on the wall. "Forlini's or somewhere new?"
Their Friday evening case prep had run long, neither realising the time until Olivia's stomach had growled rather loudly. When he'd glanced at his watch and seen the time, Rafael insisted that she let him take her to dinner, to make up for the fact she'd missed Noah's bedtime while helping him get ready for the trial that was due to start on Monday.
She shrugged. "Forlini's is fine."
"You sure? I don't mind splashing out a little if you want. My treat, remember?"
Rafael had nothing against their usual haunt, but part of him wanted to go somewhere anonymous and maybe a little more upmarket with her. She'd had a stressful couple of weeks and he wanted to help her unwind, pamper her a little. It wasn't his place, he knew that. Up until a couple of months ago, that role belonged to Tucker but now, that was over so, there was no-one to treat her, to take care of her. Of course, she'd say she didn't need taking care of, that she was more than capable of looking after herself, but she was his best friend and he saw it as part of their relationship. He had no doubt she would do the same for him. They looked out for each other.
The elevator arrived and the two stepped inside, Rafael being ever-chivalrous and allowing Olivia to go ahead of him into the empty elevator.
"I like Forlini's," she told him, pressing the button for the ground floor. It was close by, familiar, and they'd never had a bad meal there. "You did say it was my choice."
"Okay, Forlini's it is then."
The doors closed, and the elevator began it's descent. Olivia watched the number on the display change, 9… 8… 7… 6…, before glancing at Rafael out of the corner of her eye. Since her break up with Tucker, her friend been a little more attentive; calling to check on her, stopping by the office with coffee or lunch, even cutting their case prep short because she'd had a busy week or so she could go home to Noah.
She didn't mind, per se – it was kind of nice, but the idea that he thought she needed looking after irritated her a little. Not enough to stop her from enjoying it though. If she hadn't been so tired and eager to get home to Noah, she might have taken him up on his offer of dinner at a swankier place. Maybe she still would… just not tonight.
She opened her mouth to tell him such when there was a loud, ominous creak and the elevator car lurched to a sudden stop, almost throwing its two occupants off balance. Rafael's briefcase crashed to the floor and he stumbled towards Olivia, who reached out her arms to steady herself. One found purchase against the wall as her jacket slipped off her arm, the other on Rafael's shoulder. His hands went to her waist, holding them both up.
They stood, holding on to each other as they recovered from the abrupt movement and caught their breath.
"You okay?" Rafael asked once the elevator car stopped shuddering.
Olivia nodded. "Yeah, fine."
Suddenly conscious that he could feel her skin on his thumb, where it had snuck under her shirt, Rafael dropped his hands as if he'd been burnt. "Good, good," he said swallowing thickly. He turned away, embarrassed and busied himself by studying the control panel. He pushed several buttons, but nothing happened. "I think we're stuck." He pressed the emergency call button. It rang out for a few moments before a crackly voice came over the speaker.
"Hello?"
"Hello. This is ADA Rafael Barba. Lieutenant Benson of the NYPD and I are stuck in elevator number…" He glanced up at the top of the panel. "…six. The thing just stopped and no matter what buttons we press it won't move."
"We'll get maintenance up there as soon as we can," the voice crackled. "Any idea what floors you're stuck between?"
"The display says 'three'," Rafael said. "So, I'd guess between four and three or three and two."
"Okay. Are you both alright? Are you hurt? Is there anything you need?"
"We're fine. Except… Is there any chance you could you call NYPD's 16th precinct and get a message to SVU? Lieutenant Benson has a son and his nanny needs to know what's happening."
Olivia smiled at Rafael's concern for Lucy and Noah. She had been panicking about how to get in touch with them. The elevators in this building were signal blackspots, due to the metal structure of the elevator cars and the high-density bricks of the shafts.
"Will do. Don't worry, Mr Barba, we'll have you out of there in no time. Just sit tight."
"Sit tight?" Rafael muttered when the call had disconnected. He leaned against the elevator wall and rolled his eyes. "Where exactly does he think we're going to go?"
"Certainly not to dinner," Olivia replied, lowering herself to the floor.
"No," he frowned. "Sorry about that. But, look at this way, it could be worse."
Olivia looked up at him, narrowing her eyes playfully. "How exactly?"
"Well, you could be stuck in here with Carisi," he quipped.
Olivia gave a small smile. She knew it was all in jest. Rafael might enjoy teasing and sassing her detective, but there was no malice involved. She honestly didn't think the ADA had a malicious bone in his body.
"Seriously though," he continued, "if you'd refused my dinner invitation, you could be stuck in here on your own. I was set to carry on until the early hours."
"Refuse? I didn't realise that was an option. You were pretty insistent."
"You've never let anyone talk you into anything you didn't want to do," Rafael pointed out, a half-smile creeping onto his face, "so don't give me that."
"I'm armed, remember? Most people don't usually try. But you…" she tilted her head and smiled. "They say there's a fine line between brave and stupid," she teased.
"I think we're getting off topic," Rafael replied, joining Olivia on the floor, against the opposite wall, facing her, "I was explaining how, as far as being trapped in an elevator goes, we have it pretty good. Aside from the delightful company of yours truly, there are only two of us, so less people to share the limited air supply with, the car seems pretty stable so there's minimal chance of it falling and crushing us to death…"
Olivia rolled her eyes. "This is supposed to be making me feel better?"
He smirked. "Well, at least the lights are still on."
As if on cue, the overhead lights flickered momentarily, before dying completely, bathing them both in darkness.
In the darkness, Olivia raised an eyebrow. "You were saying?"
"Shit," cursed Rafael, before standing and fumbling for the call button again. But, with the power now seemingly out, so was that avenue of communication.
Olivia rummaged around in her purse for a few moments, before pulling out her cell phone. "We might not have signal, but at least we've got light." She pressed a few buttons and within moments there was a slither of light from the bright LED. She placed the phone on the floor between them.
He switched his off to save the battery, just in case they needed it later and returned it to the inside pocket of his jacket.
Olivia waved her hand at the intercom. "Thanks for asking them to get in touch with Lucy." She had called her earlier and asked her to stay late while she worked at Rafael's office but there was no guarantee how long it would be before they got out of here. At least now the young woman wouldn't be worrying and could settle down for the night. She was always happy to stay over and kept an overnight bag in Olivia's hallway cupboard for emergencies such as this.
Rafael shrugged. "I knew you'd want to let her know. That you'd–" He was cut off by his stomach growling loudly.
Olivia stifled a laugh and she rummaged through her purse once more. She shone the light of her phone in there, leaving Rafael in near darkness.
"Hey!" he protested.
"Oh shush," she replied before murmuring a triumphant, "A-ha." She returned the phone to its previous position and handed Rafael a packet of chocolate-covered animal crackers, that she kept in her bag for Noah. "It's hardly a big juicy steak," she apologised, "but it's all I've got."
"Thanks." He shuffled closer and took the packet and opened it, reaching in and scooping out a few. He popped them into his mouth, before settling in the space next to her, so they were sat shoulder to shoulder. Easier to share both the light and the crackers that way. Snacks like this were one of Rafael's guilty pleasures. One of the unforeseen benefits of Olivia becoming a mother was the increased presence of said snacks; in her office, in her car, in her home and apparently also in her purse.
He handed her the packet back and she too helped herself to a few crackers and the two sat quietly, sharing the children's treat. It wasn't Forlini's, but it would stave off the hunger for a little while at least.
The empty packet of animal crackers lay unattended on the floor as Rafael and Olivia each sat back against the walls. The crackers had satisfied their hunger for now, but they had no water with them. It normally wouldn't have been a problem, but the lack of power meant the ventilation system wasn't working and the air inside the elevator was getting warm. Rafael had shed his jacket and loosened his tie, while Olivia had found an errant hair tie in her bag and pulled her brown locks back into a ponytail to prevent them sticking to the back of her neck.
"Any plans for the weekend?" Rafael asked. He pulled at the knot of his tie until it came undone and then tugged the offending garment out of his collar.
"If we ever get out here, you mean?"
"Naturally."
"Well, Noah wants to go to the amusement park at Coney Island – one of his friends from pre-K has been and it's all he's talked about for weeks. I finally gave in and said we could go this weekend."
Rafael tilted his head. "You don't sound too thrilled by the idea?"
Olivia bit her lip.
"Come on, you can tell me."
Her gaze lowered to her lap. "I don't really like rides," she admitted quietly and waited for his laugh.
After a few moments, when Rafael didn't laugh, she slowly lifted her eyes. She was surprised to see him looking at her with a soft expression.
"You're not laughing."
Rafael looked affronted. "Why would I laugh?"
"Because it's ridiculous. I'm a police officer who thrives on adrenaline, yet the thought of a roller coaster makes my palms sweat."
He nudged her shoulder with his. "Everyone's afraid of something, Liv."
"Yeah, what's your fear then?"
"Moths," he replied without missing a beat.
"Why? Scared they'll eat your expensive suits?" Olivia teased.
"Hey. No laughing, remember?"
"Sorry. So, not because of the suits then?"
"No. I can't really explain it but growing up my bedroom window was beside the front door and the porch light would be left on and moths would be constantly flying around outside and congregating on my window."
Olivia nodded. Many phobias often came from childhood experiences that often seemed quite innocuous to others. Though she wasn't sure where hers originated.
"Maybe taking Noah to Coney Island will force me to confront and conquer my fears," she said, uncertainty lacing every word.
"I like rides," he announced, internally kicking himself for just throwing it out there with no warning. "I mean if you want someone to come who can ride with Noah… well, I'm not doing anything else with my Saturday. Of course, it's fine if you'd rather I didn't too. You must be pretty sick of the sight of me this week…"
Olivia held up a hand to shush him. "You know, for someone who makes some pretty powerful speeches in the courtroom, you don't half babble," she teased, with a smile.
Rafael flashed his trademark half-smile. "My courtroom spiel is all rehearsed, planned. Things like this," he waved a hand between them, "the more… personal conversations, often tie me in knots." Particularly personal conversations with you, he added to himself.
"Well, if you're willing to give up your quiet, peaceful Saturday to chase my son around an amusement park and save me from the big, scary rollercoasters, then who am I to say no?"
Since the end of her last relationship, they'd been spending more time together outside the office. Actually, a friendship outside their professional boundaries was something they had started exploring before she was dating Tucker but had slipped away somewhat in the intervening months. They were back on track now though and she found, somewhat surprisingly, that she enjoyed his company. A few years ago, when he and his big brass ego breezed into their professional circle, she would never have imagined that she would become friends with Rafael Barba, but that was before she really knew him. Now she saw past the sarcasm and expensive suits and recognised that what she first thought was arrogance was a carefully constructed façade. One designed to both impress and keep people at arms' length emotionally to keep them from seeing the real him. The real him that she had been privileged to glimpse more and more in recent times.
"Yeah?" he asked, almost unbelievingly.
Olivia nodded. "Yeah, why not? It'll be fun."
"Even with my 'babbling'?"
She shrugged. "I never said I minded the babbling. It's kinda cute."
"Cute?" He raised an eyebrow. "You think I'm cute?"
"I said the babbling was cute. Kind of," she protested, glad her blush was hidden in the dim light.
Rafael leaned his head back against the wall. "Olivia Benson thinks I'm cute," he smirked to himself, earning him a light slap on the thigh.
Olivia mirrored his movements, resting her head on the wall too, and rolled her eyes. He was never going to let her live this one down.
Olivia shifted her position as her legs were going to sleep. As she moved she felt the vest-top she wore under her shirt sticking to her lower back due to the increasing temperature. She switched on her phone screen to look at the clock and groaned. They'd been in here for an hour and a half. If the temperature kept rising at the current rate, it was soon going to become very uncomfortable.
Her movement caught Rafael's attention. "You okay?"
"Just a bit warm," she replied. Her hands went to the buttons on her shirt and began unfastening them.
"L-Liv?" Rafael's eyes widened for a moment before he clamped them shut.
"Relax Rafael." Olivia chuckled as she shrugged out of her shirt. "I'm still perfectly decent."
He cracked open one eye and let out a relieved breath. He didn't quite agree with her assessment that she was perfectly decent, but she was relatively covered by the vest top she wore. Her cleavage was somewhat exposed but no more than the hundreds of women who wore similar clothing out and about in the summer. It was hardly risqué – but for him, it was like fuel to the fire. He'd never seen this much of her bare skin before though and it was affecting more than it should.
He'd been attracted to Olivia since the moment he met her, but he'd pushed his lustful thoughts aside in favour of building a solid, professional relationship. A relationship that, over the intervening years, had morphed into one of the strongest, closest friendships he'd ever had. It wouldn't do to allow the testosterone-driven side of his brain to ruin that.
Rafael ran his hand over his face, into his hair and over the back of his neck, feeling the heat there. He couldn't blame her for wanting to be rid of her shirt, it was becoming rather uncomfortable in the enclosed space of the elevator.
"You know," he said, unfastening and removing his cufflinks, "that's not a bad idea." He stripped off his dress shirt, leaving him in just his undershirt.
As he busied himself folding his shirt and pocketing his cufflinks, Olivia took the opportunity to study his physique. His expensive, tailored suits had been hiding a multitude of delights. Oh, there had been hints - it was clear he was broad-shouldered and when he rolled up his sleeves at the end of a hard day, she could see the well-defined muscles in his forearms. But that was nothing compared to the sight of him in his white undershirt, tight across his chest and shoulders, accentuating his broad, muscular frame.
Around his neck was a thin gold chain, a small crucifix hanging from the centre. She'd seen glimpses of it in the past, when he'd worn an open collar, and suspected it was of religious significance, but she'd never known for sure. She leaned in slightly, squinting to try and get a closer look in the dim light.
"It was my grandfather's."
She lifted her eyes and found him looking at her with a soft expression.
"My abuelita gave it to me after his funeral."
She reached out a hand towards the crucifix. "May I?"
He gave an almost imperceptible nod and she lifted the phone with one hand, directing the beam from the flashlight app, and took the crucifix in her slender fingers of her other.
As she leaned ever closer, Rafael found himself surrounded by the scent of her perfume. The simple floral, yet slightly musky aroma filled his nostrils and almost caused his breath to catch in his chest.
"It's beautiful," Olivia whispered as she examined the intricate etchings on the cross that hung close to his heart. It must have taken someone hours of painstaking work to create it.
He glanced down at her and found he had to bite his lip, save the words, 'you're beautiful' should escape.
The light from the phone caught on a bead of sweat travelling down the side of Olivia's neck and caught Rafael's eye. Transfixed, his gaze followed its path along the skin of her décolletage and he imagined leaning over and licking it away. The droplet slid lower, down into the valley of her cleavage. Somewhere else Rafael had often imagined being… kissing the swell of her breasts, nibbling and sucking…
"Rafael?"
Her voice broke into his daydreams and he quickly averted his gaze.
"S-sorry. Sorry." he stammered, a blush rising in his cheeks at being caught staring. He tried to shuffle away, to put some distance between them, but she dropped her hand to his chest, stopping him cold.
Olivia regarded him curiously. If she didn't know any better, she'd swear he'd been checking her out. At first, she thought she must be mistaken; he'd never before shown the slightest bit of interest in a romantic or even physical relationship with her before. But the physical indicators were all there; the dilated pupils – visible to her even though he wouldn't meet her eye – his reddened cheeks, the fast beating of his heart under her fingertips. He definitely appeared to be attracted to her.
Rafael desperately tried to think of something to say that could save him – and their friendship. God, he was such an idiot. He'd be lucky if she didn't shoot him. He opened his mouth to speak but words failed him when he felt her fingers creeping up his chest. When they reached the collar of his undershirt, they traced the ribbed neckline, occasionally brushing the skin below his Adam's apple.
He swallowed nervously as her fingers continued their torturous path up his neck and over his jaw to cup his cheek.
"L-Liv?"
She turned his face towards hers in her response, encouraging him to look at her as she tried to wordlessly convey her feelings.
He studied her face, from the deepening shades of brown that lit her eyes, to the curve of her cheek. His eyes finally landed on her lips. He watched her drag her bottom lip between her teeth again and could only think of sweeping his tongue across it. He leaned closer, drawn to the sight. He stopped only scant inches away.
Their breaths mingled, and Olivia felt her heart fluttering maddeningly in her chest, almost as rapidly as Rafael's. She drew in a shaking breath.
"Rafa…"
Her voice hitched; there was a faint note of keening in it. Enough that the sound – mixed with the shortening of his name – had his groin tightening in response. When she drew her bottom lip between her teeth again, his head lowered. This time he gave in to the urge to pull it into his mouth and run his tongue across it.
A low, thick moan rumbled in her throat as his mouth closed over hers, and she curled her hand behind his neck, pulling him closer. She opened her mouth to allow his tongue the entrance it demanded, but before Rafael could deepen the kiss, the lights came back on and – with a loud, clanking sound – the elevator began moving again.
Olivia and Rafael sprang apart and hurried to redress and gather their belongings. No words were uttered between the two as they righted themselves. Whatever spell they had been under while trapped was broken, they had crashed – hard – back to reality. Now they had to hope that they hadn't done too much damage to their friendship in the process.
Despite not having reported any injuries at initial contact, paramedics were there when they exited the elevator on the ground floor, waiting to check them both out. After a cursory examination, they were both given water and sent on their way with instructions to consult their own physicians if they felt any ill-effects from their eventful elevator ride.
They'd been examined separately, giving them both time to think about their kiss. While it had been unexpected for Olivia, she found she didn't mind at all. She'd been trying to ignore her budding feelings for him for the sake of their friendship but the feel of his lips on hers had blown any and all of her reasons out of the water. Kissing Rafael felt like coming home. Safe, secure. She felt whole in his arms, like the missing piece of the jigsaw had been slotted into place.
Rafael however, was feeling the exact opposite. While the kiss had been wonderful – better than he'd ever imagined – he was struggling with what it meant for them going forward. Olivia had never shown any signs that she was interested in anything more than friendship from him. A friendship that he'd been trying to protect by fighting his attraction for her. Now he feared it had all been for nought. Cursing himself for his weakness, he gathered his jacket and briefcase and, after checking Olivia was still occupied on the phone – checking in with Lucy – he decided to slink away.
Olivia's brow furrowed as she saw him leaving in her peripheral vision. She said a hasty goodbye to her nanny and hung up, before jogging out of Hogan Place after him. She caught up with him just as he was about to begin the descent down the large row of steps that led up to the building.
"You're going?" she asked. She searched his eyes for an explanation.
"Yeah, I need to get home. I'll, uh, I'll see you in court on Monday," he said, avoiding eye contact.
"Rafael, wait!" Olivia called after him.
He stopped halfway down the steps, looking heavenward. He knew that tone – this conversation was going to happen, and it was going to happen tonight. Rafael was well aware that If he continued walking, Olivia would either chase after him or turn up at his apartment later. He turned back to her, shoulders slumped in defeat.
"Liv… look, I'm sorry, okay? Can we just blame it on the heat in there… or the lack of air… or hunger-induced madness?"
"No."
Rafael swallowed thickly. "Right," he exhaled. "Well, I'll speak to McCoy on Monday… I'm not sure where there's an opening but I'm sure, given the circumstances, he'll be able to find me something. Wouldn't do for a sex crimes DA to be charged with sexual harassment. It's unbecoming."
He turned to leave once more and this time her hand shot out to stop him. He felt the heat of her touch burn through his sleeve.
She moved down a step, to stand level with him. "You seem to be operating under the misapprehension that I have a problem with what happened in the elevator."
"I…" He took a moment to look at her face. Her eyes were shining, and she appeared relaxed, and happy, if a little confused. There wasn't a hint of anger or revulsion in her expression. "You don't?"
Olivia shook her head with a smile. "You still owe me dinner. How about we talk about it over take-out at my place?"
"So, uh, are we going to talk about what happened?" hedged Rafael. They'd been at Olivia's apartment for almost an hour and had eaten their way through a large pizza and garlic bread – as well as half a bottle of wine – but they had yet to broach the topic of what happened in the elevator.
Olivia put her wine glass down and turned towards him on the couch. While she had been the one to suggest talking, part of her had hoped that once they'd fallen back into something resembling normality, things would just progress naturally, organically. But it appeared not. "Sure. You kissed me," she said, matter-of-factly.
Rafael felt the blush rising in his cheeks once more. He swallowed, his throat suddenly dry. "I did, yes and I'm s–"
Olivia shook her head, holding up a hand to quieten him. "Please don't apologise. You've done nothing to be sorry for. Or did you somehow miss the part where I was kissing you back?"
Rafael considered her words. She had kissed him back. Vehemently. It wasn't something that he was likely to forget. "I just assumed you were caught up in the moment," he said quietly.
"I was," she admitted, "just like you. But that doesn't mean I didn't welcome it." She shifted closer and placed her hand on his knee. "Rafa, I'm a trained SVU detective, if I hadn't wanted you to kiss me, you'd have been on the floor and restrained before your lips had touched mine."
"So, you did want me to kiss you?" His head was spinning. He never thought, never imagined that she would return his feelings.
Olivia raised an eyebrow. "I thought you went to Harvard?" she teased., the corner of her mouth twitching. "Yes, I wanted you to kiss me. I didn't realise how badly until that moment, but I wanted it, Rafa." She leaned in and he could feel her breath on the shell of his ear. "I still do."
"Liv…" He squeezed his eyes shut, desperately trying to cling on to his last vestiges of self-control. He could turn, kiss her and push her down on the couch and he was sure – from the way her fingers were dancing deliciously up his thigh – that she wouldn't mind, but this was more than just physical for him. And she needed to know that before they took that step.
"Unless… you think it was a mistake," she said weakly, suddenly overcome with a crippling fear that she'd misjudged the situation. She moved to pull away, but Rafael's hand shot out to grab her wrist.
"No," he rasped. "God, no. I've wanted to kiss you for a long time, it's just–"
"How long?"
His brow furrowed. "I'm sorry?"
"How long have you wanted to kiss me?" she clarified.
Rafael exhaled deeply. "Longer than I should have."
Olivia gave him a pointed look, clearly conveying that she didn't think that was a good enough answer.
With his free hand, Rafael lifted his glass from the table and downed the rest of his wine. He rolled the stem in between his thumb and forefinger, spinning the glass round as he spoke. "I've been attracted to you since the first day I met you," he admitted, his eyes fixed resolutely on the glass. He could feel her gaze boring into the side of his head but knew if he looked at her he wouldn't be able to say all that he needed to. "I ignored it of course, ever the professional, and we had a great working relationship and became friends. But over the past year, I've begun to realise that it was more than just physical. That what I felt for you went beyond the realms of friendship."
He loosened his grip on her wrist and she quickly rearranged their hands, taking his in hers and interlacing their fingers.
"Why didn't you say anything?"
"Fear. I told you earlier that I was afraid of moths and I am, but that's a silly, superficial fear. My real fear, the deep-seated one… is failure. At anything. School. Work…" He paused for a moment, staring at their entwined hands as he gathered his thoughts. Once he said the word, it was out there, there was no going back. "…Love."
Olivia's hand, the one that wasn't holding his, had found its way to the back of his neck as he spoke and was currently carding through his hair.
He turned his head and lifted his gaze. "If I'd told you how I felt, and you didn't feel the same, I would have lost my best friend…"
She squeezed his hand. "Oh, Rafa."
"… So I kept it to myself. But in the elevator… I couldn't hold back any longer and now I've ruined everything." He pulled his hand from hers and stood, pacing beside her coffee table.
Olivia got to her feet too. "It's not ruined. I told you, I want this."
"Yeah, I know and the fact that you feel the same is… mind-blowing… but part of me can't help thinking, what if it doesn't work out. If we go down this road and I screw it up, as I have done with every other relationship I've had, I still lose you. I can't win."
"Rafa…" Her voice hitched, thick and low with emotion. When he didn't turn, she walked slowly toward him. She could feel the tension coming off him in waves. Olivia's heart pounded out a hard, fast rhythm within her chest. She may only just have admitted to herself what she felt for this man – this brilliant, kind, funny man – but she knew what she wanted. She wanted more than friendship, and deep down she had for a while. She didn't know exactly when the shift came, but it had. Now they could walk away from it, scared of what might be, or they could push forward and embrace the possibilities.
Rafael felt the tremble in her fingers when she lay them against his upper back. He took a deep breath as he turned slowly. Meeting her gaze, he saw the emotions play over her face, sadness that he should feel so conflicted about them, uncertainty as to what to do or say for the best, but also fondness and happiness. There was hope too and something else… something that he didn't dare try and define, in case he was wrong, but something that he felt echo through him, causing his heart to beat a little faster.
Her hands rose to his face, and the tips of her fingers settled against his jaw. She drew his gaze to hers. "You aren't going to lose me." She couldn't promise him forever – especially with her line of work – but at that moment, in the way that he meant, she wasn't going anywhere. "I want you, Rafa. I want us."
"You need to know, Liv… this," he waved a hand between them, "this is it for me. I can't do one night or something casual. If we do this, I'm all in."
"I'm all in too," she promised.
His head bent and hovered close to hers for a moment, breathing her in. His eyes closed as he inhaled. He could smell the softly scented perfume that she wore and it affected him the same way it had in the elevator. His nose nuzzled her cheek. Rafael felt her lips curve as his brushed against them. They lingered there, barely a caress at all. When she hummed, and moved against him, increasing the pressure of the kiss, Rafael wrapped his arms around her and gathered her close.
His mouth angled over hers, even as her arms slid around his waist. Olivia's hands slid around his neck. She melted against him. A soft, low sound rumbled in her throat at the first brush of his tongue against her bottom lip. Heat moved through her. As the kiss slowly deepened, unhurried and lingering, his hands began wandering the length of her back. When at last they broke apart, she turned her face into his neck, while he continued to hold her.
This was what he'd worried would come between them. Instead, it was heat and emotion, hope, and possibility. When he felt he fingers begin to tease the hair at the nape of his neck, he drew back to look at her.
Her lips, slightly swollen from his kiss, curved slowly upward into a soft smile. She tipped her face toward him and let her lips brush his again, gently, softly. "Hi," she whispered.
"Hi." His hand reached up and his thumb stroked the curve of her lips. He smiled back at her. His eyes sparkling. They had spent countless hours together, in their offices, in court not to mention their recent increase of evening and weekend get-togethers but oddly, he felt as if he had finally found her. A sense of peace settled over him, as though this was exactly where they had always been destined to end up, and all they had needed was time, and a catalyst.
His head lowered again, this time so that their foreheads touched. "Maybe we should sit down," he said, gestured to the couch.
"Really?" Her brows lifted. Her lips curved into a small, teasing smile.
His jaw clenched. "I'm serious Liv. If we don't, I'm not sure I'm going to be able to keep my hands to myself." Holding her was wonderfully intoxicating, and only served to increase his desire for her, but he didn't want to pressure her.
"Who says you have to?" There was a challenge in her gaze. Olivia took a step back and let her gaze sweep over him. She took his hand and gave it a tug as she turned. When he didn't immediately budge, she cast a look at him over her shoulder. "Rafa, I'm sure."
That was all he needed to hear. He pulled her back to him, his other arm sliding around her waist, while their hands remained joined. His mouth caught hers again. This time the kiss was far more insistent, with none of the sweet and lingering heat of earlier. He walked her backwards down the hall, while their mouths were still joined, to her bedroom door. Only there did they part, breaths mingled, eyes alight with need and desire.
They hesitated just for a moment. They were making a conscious choice, one not entirely buried in need and want – although that was there in abundance – but it was still a big step. They were crossing the final line between friendship and romance. She stepped over it first, backing into her room and giving his hand a gentle tug. Rafael followed her inside and pushed the door closed behind him.
Some time later, she lay on her stomach beside him, arms folded beneath her and a sheet bunched around her hips. The rest of the bedding had been lost to the floor. The hour had grown late. Or early, as the case may be, and the room was lit by only a single, dim lamp. After making love, they had talked and laughed, and now they lay watching one another. She smiled when his hand moved slowly upward, tracing the curve of her spine. The leg that was curled around his slid higher. When her knee brushed against him, drawing a hiss, she smirked.
His lips brushed the soft skin beneath her ear. His hand moved lower, to slide along her thigh as her leg lifted to curl around him. He stroked the smooth skin, from her hip to her knee and back again. He was delighting in the feel of her, much as he had been since they crossed this threshold earlier. Free now to touch her, he found that he couldn't stop.
Olivia hummed quietly as his tongue traced the line of her collarbone. Her neck arched. Her eyes closed while her fingers combed through his hair. Her nails raked gently against his scalp. The physical intimacy came so easily now, it seemed to have been all that they were missing previously.
They were already intimate. That was something they'd discussed earlier. There was so much more to being intimate with another person than just sex. They already crossed the emotional boundaries. In hindsight, it seemed inevitable that they would eventually take that final step. Now they had, and their relationship didn't feel as though it had changed much at all.
Rafael hated to break the spell that they were under, but questions needed to be asked. One in particular.
"What time will Noah be awake?" In the quiet of the room, his voice was thick and deep.
Olivia hummed. She glanced at the clock before turning her face further into the pillow and letting her eyes close. "We've got a few hours yet," she murmured.
"Do you want me to…?" he gestured towards the door.
"Don't you dare," she warned, throwing her arm over his stomach as if to anchor him in place. "You promised to come with us to Coney Island, remember?"
"I know, and I still will…" His fingers traced light circles on the bare skin of her arm. "I just don't want things to be awkward with Noah."
"Rafa, he's four years old. He has no concept of sex or what it means that you're in my bed. All he'll care about is that his 'Uncle Rafa' is here for breakfast. In fact, knowing my son, he'll probably try and use it as an excuse to have pancakes."
"You need an excuse to have pancakes?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. He stretched his arm across the pillows and Olivia lifted her head.
"You do when you're four-years-old and sugar sends you hyper," she replied, shifting closer to Rafael, resting her head on his shoulder
His arm wrapped around her, holding her. "He'll run it off at the amusement park," Rafael reasoned.
Olivia groaned. The thought of making that trip after the stress of the previous day and the late – but very enjoyable – night made her muscles ache. But she'd promised Noah and couldn't let him down.
Rafael chuckled, pressing his lips gently on her head. "Don't worry, caríño," he whispered. "I'll chase after him."
When Olivia shivered slightly – the breeze from the open window caressing her skin, he reached beyond her for the edge of the sheet and tugged it up over them. It barely covered him at all, but she was wrapped in its warmth. She made a low, small sound of approval and when he glanced down, her eyes were closed. There was still a small smile playing at her lips.
Her thoughts had drifted to their plans for the day and she could picture it in her mind's eye. The three of them walking hand-in-hand through the crowds, stopping to play the occasional side-show game, Noah laughing and giggling, screaming with excitement on the rides, Rafael by his side. Who knows, maybe she'd even brave one of the tamer attractions. Being with Rafael made her brave, almost fearless.
When they'd stepped into the elevator at Hogan Place to grab a quick dinner as friends, neither of them could have imagined the direction their night – or their relationship – was going to take. In fact, they'd both been afraid of pressing for the change. But now, lying in each other's arms, making plans for the following day, they welcomed it wholeheartedly. They were still friends, but they were also something more.