Disclaimer: I don't own nothing that ain't mine!

Dear Agony

Trigon had been getting stronger. I tried. I really tried, but I could feel him breaking through my defenses.

I have nothing left to give
I have found the perfect end
You were made to make it hurt
disappear into the dirt

Thanks to him my emotions had been going haywire. I had no control over my powers. He was the reason I was sitting in the middle of my bed sobbing my eyes out. I decided I would end it all before Trigon could use me to destroy everyone I cared about again. Their lives would be better without me, I was just a distraction. No one would miss me anyway.

I picked up the glistening knife of my nightstand and pulled back the sleeve on my leotard revealing scar after scar. I knew this was wrong but this relieved the pain and turmoil I was feeling inside, but no more. This was the last.

Carry me to heaven's arms
Light the way and let me go
Take the time to take my breath
I will end where I began

I looked at the knife with disgust and hatred of what it was about to do. I knew it would be my fault and the knife would bare no blame, that was the origin of my disgust. One so small that has caused so much pain was considered unimportant in the eyes of most. This is what would take me to Heaven. It would lead me there but it would stay behind on earth as a haunting memory of the horror I was. I took a deep breath then pressed the knife into my wrist and watched as warm red liquid flowed down my arm, strangely entrancing.

And I will find the enemy within
Because I can feel it crawl beneath my skin

Dear agony
Just let go of me
Suffer slowly
Is this the way it's got to be
Dear agony

I could hear Trigon's voice hissing 'You foolish girl! Look what you have done!' He would never have control over me again! I grinned with a sick satisfaction. He was slipping away from me and would rot in hell forever because of his malevolence. He would learn pain and he would know suffering. That was just the way things were.

Suddenly the lights go out
Let forever drag me down
I will fight for one last breath
I will fight until the end

Everything was fading, my vision was getting blurry as I stared up at the ceiling. I could hear the call of death and I didn't resist. I fought to speak, I needed to get the last word in. "You lose." I managed to say as I struggled to breathe.

And I will find the enemy within
Because I can feel it crawl beneath my skin

Dear agony
Just let go of me
suffer slowly
is this the way it's got to be
Dear agony

There was no more pain now just a numb feeling. I listened to Trigon's angry howls and laughed. He was going to be trapped forever and I would be free. Then I felt a searing pain in my chest. "No!" I screamed. Trigon was trying to escape his bounds. He would kill them all.

Leave me alone
God let me go
I'm blue and cold
Black sky will burn
Love pull me down
Hate lift me up
Just turn around there's nothing left

I was standing outside Raven's door when I heard her laugh. It sounded pained. The I heard her scream "No!" I barged in not knowing what I would find. There on her bed she lay holding a bleeding wrist to herself as she fought Trigon's control. I watched as a light appeared at her chest and a portal opened. In it I saw Trigon attempting to open it further. "LEAVE HER ALONE!" I screamed. He laughed and pried the portal open farther, then the portal disappeared suddenly along with Trigon. A relieved smile crossed my face but it fell when I realized Raven wasn't breathing. I felt as if God himself had forsaken me. I rushed to her side and lifted her up into my lap and felt for a pulse…none. I felt the tears fill my eyes and just let them fall. Raven's body was becoming colder by the minute and her lips gaining a blue-ish tint. Raven's mirror then shattered, millions of glass pieces falling through the air, slicing my skin. I took no heed; I just was gone. Everyone I love dies! I thought. hatred seemed to be the only way to keep someone alive!

Somewhere far beyond this world
I feel nothing anymore

Dear agony
Just let go of me
suffer slowly
Is this the way it's got to be
Don't bury me
Faceless enemy
I'm so sorry
Is this the way it's got to be
Dear agony

I became numb. It was like I wasn't there anymore. A blind rage filled me and I let out a primeval scream. I could feel the beast coming. It was getting stronger and I didn't fight it. I just let it be free. The others burst through the door and looked on with horror at the scene. It would seem as if I did this. So I ran. I pushed past the others and ran as they stared blankly at her dead body. They chased after me, but I was faster. I hid, not knowing Raven left a note saying why she did it and the others didn't blame me. I became the beast within.

I feel nothing anymore