This is ALL Flamebyrd's fault-- we were discussing the Yue/Ruby Moon pairing, which turned into an impromptu joint 'fic-thing over ICQ, which, uh, morphed into this. Half the dialogue is hers, and she brought the topic up in the first place, SO.
This is set in Angelrain continuum, where, uh, everyone's dead. We decided that it was the /only/ plausible was that they could ever get together. ("My master's dead!" "So's mine!" "WAH!")
Enjoy, and you probably shouldn't think too hard on it, because it might make your brain bleed. XD
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How To Catch The Moon
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STEP ONE: THE SUBTLE APPROACH.
"You know, Yue, I've always liked the moon... It seems so cold, but if you look more closely, it's very warm. And beautiful..."
"Clow liked the moon..."
"...Yue?"
"Yes?"
"You're really dense."
THE NOT SO SUBTLE APPROACH.
"Yue, I /really/ like the moon."
"..."
"And you remind me a lot of the moon, in some ways."
"..."
"Nevermind."
WHEN SUBTLETY FAILS...
"Yue, I like you."
"...*thud*"
"Yue? Yue--this is /not/ funny."
CANDLELIT DINNERS ARE ALWAYS IN STYLE
"Look, Yue, just because you're a magical guardian that doesn't /have/ to eat, doesn't mean that you /can't/ eat. Give it a try. You might like it."
"..."
"And try not to set fire to your hair."
FLOWERS AND CHOCOLATE WORK, TOO.
"What's this?"
"Flowers, Yue. And chocolate."
"..."
"You eat the chocolate. You don't eat the flowers, unless you feel like being exotic."
"..."
"...Touya-kun wasn't one for traditional courtship, was he?"
"He bought chocolates for Yukito, once. They shipped it in a truck."
AMUSEMENT PARKS ARE TRADITIONAL.
"Akizuki? Let go."
"..."
"Akizuki, you've got /wings/. You /can't/ be afraid of heights."
AS ARE PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION.
"Akizuki? Akizuki, get off me."
"No wanna."
"Akizuki, I can't /breathe/."
"Oops."
SEDUCTION IS ANOTHER OPTION.
"Akizuki? What's that thing you're... barely... wearing...?"
"..."
WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS, RECRUIT HELP.
"This is /never/ going to work, Tsukishiro-kun."
"I'm sure it will. Yue's just shy."
"/Shy/... never went /this/ far."
"Well, he's repressed, too..."
"But that's what I'm trying to /help/!"
EVEN IF THE LOVE ADVICE IS COMING FROM AN UNEXPECTED SOURCE.
"You have to work up these things slowly with him."
"I noticed."
...IN AN UNEXPECTED WAY.
"Right. Can you show me how to do that thing with your tongue again?"
... ...AND YOU LEARN MORE THAN YOU REALLY WANT TO IN THE PROCESS.
"You're /sure/ the whipped cream will work?"
"...Well, it did for To-ya..."
PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE.
"You think it'd work if I whacked him over the head and dragged him off?"
"Be patient."
"But I don't /want/ to be patient!"
"It's a virtue."
"I don't /want/ virtue, either. I want--"
"Ahem."
AND SO IS PERSEVERANCE.
"I give up."
"No, no. He's just shy. And he has hangups."
"About what?"
"Clow. To-ya. Life. The Universe. Everything."
"So how did /Touya-kun/ do it, anyway?"
"By skirting around the topic for ages until I got tired of it."
"And?"
"Well, I had to kiss them both before they got the right idea into their heads."
"Hmm. Tsukishiro-kun, you think it might work if we--"
"Probably not."
"Damn."
UNDERSTAND THE SITUATION FULLY.
"Just how long /did/ it take you to get tired of it, anyway?"
"Um... around 23 months."
"/What/?!"
JUST REMEMBER: IT'LL ALL PAY OFF IN THE END.
"Akizuki, I..."
"Yes, Yue?"
"I... I..."
"..."
"...*mumble* Suki da."
"What was that?"
"Um... Um... Tsuki da! Look, see? The moon!"
"...*sweatdrop*
- O-wa-ri DAAAA! -