Chapter 1

I do not own Merlin…though Arthur is on my Christmas list.

Hello everyone. This will not really follow the events as they happened. Read and enjoy. Don't forget to review and tell me what you think.

Gwen felt the cold seeping to her bone as she sat in the dark forest with a small fire trying to keep warm. You would feel like you are freezing if you had just jumped into the riveer fully clothed. Until her clothes were dry, she would be sitting there chuttering. She could only hope she would make it through the night so she could go to Camelot.

Camelot. Her home for her whole life, a place which held those she had once thought of as her friends, a place she had been banished on penalty of death by the love of her life, a place she had vowed never to return.

Her heart twisted as her hands trailed her necklace and fingered the ring that dangled from it. It the ring her Arthur had given her. she remembered the night he had proposed like yesterday. It had been the best day of her life. The day that she knew her dreams will finally come true. That Arthur loved her, a mere maid and wanted her to be his queen.

She should have known it was too good to be true. One visit from an old friend had destroyed everything.

She cursed the day she let Lancelot in her house but how could she have not? She felt nothing for him anymore. He was just a mere friend to her. she remembered how he had congratulated her and given her a token. It was a beautiful bracelet with beautiful intricate designs. She should have questioned why but she was just happy he was alive. That she hadn't sent him to his death.

Soon after wearing it, she found herself kissing him. It felt like someone was pulling her to him. She was unable to resist. She had felt like she was in a haze. A dreamy haze that only ended when she took off the bracelet. A dream that ended when she faced Arthur's accusing blue eyes in front of the council.

Her mind drifted back to the worst moment of her life.

"What happened Guinevere?" Arthur asked the sadness fury in his blue eyes. Her heart broke at that. she had caused him to feel that way but she didn't know why she had done what she had. In her heart and mind she loved Arthur. she was in love with him.

"We were happy. I know we were." Said Arthur and Gwen nodded. we were happy Arthur. you made me the happiest I have ever been. You gave me hope that the impossible could happen. Me a mere maid could be loved by the prince.

"You love him? You have always loved him?"

'No Arthur. I love you and only you!' her mind screamed her to say yet she only managed a weak, "No."

"All those times you said you wanted to be with me?"

"I meant every word!" she had said and she was hurt he didn't seem to believe her. When had she ever given him reason to doubt her? Hadn't she made her intentions clear to him? Did he always have doubts in her about how she felt?

"You mean everything to me Arthur. Once there was Lancelot, a long time ago. But I haven't considered him in that way for many years. I thought I would never see him agai and then when I did, I was overwhelmed. I was drawn to him. I couldn't stop myself. I don't know why." She looked at Arthur in the eyes. "I love you Arthur. You are my everything."

She had thought she had got to him. She had made him see how much she loved him yet he still said the words, words that still pained her to the very core.

"You will leave Camelot at first light. You return upon pain of death."

Her heart had broken then. Crushed beyond repair. When she packed her small belongings, when she pushed her cart all alone with the laughing eyes of the people of Camelot who knew her to be the one who betrayed the king, she had been like a zombie. She was a walking shell. Nothing else mattered now. Arthur didn't want her and he had sent her away knowing she had nowhere to go.

Everything had clicked to her just a few days after leaving Camelot. It had been the bracelet. She had felt for Lancelot the moment he had place that bracelet on her and all her feelings for him and the haziness had left when she took it off.

She had been drugged or enchanted. She knew that had to be it though she couldn't prove it. She was so sure Morgana was involved.

Now here she was, thinking of Arthur, running from Morgana and Helios and returning to Camelot to the man who would have her killed at first sight just to try and save him.

In all honesty, she had no idea how she was going to see him let alone get him to listen to her. One thing she knew was she wanted nothing to do with him anymore. He had disappointed her and as soon as she told him what she knew, she would leave never to return.

She didn't know when she fell asleep only waking to herself facing Morgana who was on a horse dressed in a black dress.

"Nice to see you again. Oh you've forgotten, I have hunted in these woods since I was a child. Did you think you could run from me?"

Gwen felt anger as she looked at Morgana. How could she do this to her? How! They had been friends hadn't they? She had taken care of her, gone beyond the duties of a servant and yet this was how she was being repayed? Maybe it was her luck. She had been loyal to Arthur and he had cast her aside with not a thought, she had been the best brother she could have been to Elyan and yet he had just looked at her with disgust and had chosen his job as a knight of Camelot over her. She wouldn't even start on Merlin.

"I know it was you. I know you enchanted me to kiss Lancelot. You have done enough. You have your Camelot. Leave me alone!" said Gwen in fury only to feel rage when Morgana laughed.

"Of course you figured that out. You were always wise beyond your station. However your Arthur didn't believe you and he sent you away. How does it feel to know he had no faith in you? That he right now is getting ready to get married to another woman of better standing than you?"

Gwen must have shown her surprise. Arthur was getting married? "Yes to a princess too."

"Well you got what you wanted. leave me alone."

"I don't think so. See, i don't want you to go so you can tell him my secrets. Yes. I know you may hate him but you also love him enough to try and save him. Pathetic and weak if I should say."

Gwen glared at Morgana her eyes reflecting all the hate she felt then she turned and started running. she didn't get far before a blast lifted her in the air and she hit a tree with a sickening crunch and fell to the ground with a thud.

xxx

Arthur couldn't believe he was hunting with another woman. Princess Mithian…a beautiful dark haired woman with skin as white as snow and grace and beauty befitting a queen. She was everything a king would want but yet he felt nothing for her.

She paled in comparison to his Guinevere. Guinevere… it still hurt so much to think about her. she had betrayed him in the worst kind of way. She kissing Lancelot had broke his heart beyond repair. HShe had broken his trust and he didn't think he would ever trust again.

He tried to forget her. Tried to justify why she had sent him away when he knew her home was here in Camelot. Every night he wondered where she was, if she was safe, if she was thinking of him like he was.

He had been disappointed when Lancelot killed himself. He had wanted to be the one to do it. He knew he was fooling himself if he thought he could marry princess Mithian. Guinevere had his heart and he knew the ache he felt would only heal when he saw her…that was unlikely.

As they hunted, he saw a doe young brown and beautiful. It looked petrified and scared but as a hunter he was compelled to take the shot. He aimed and shot but missed. He was surprised. He never missed. Ever. It was like his arrow had been directed by a force away from the doe. Spooked the doe ran for the bushed then another arrow whizzed and struck it. An arrow from Mithian;

Arthur tried to look for the doe but he couldn't find it. As he did, he saw something shiny on the ground. It was a chain and on it was a ring, the ring he had given Guinevere for their engagement. His heart stalled. It was like no one else was there. He looked around frantically hoping to see her, to catch a glimpse of her but all he could see were trees and bushes.

"Arthur?" said Merlin.

"My Lord?" came Mithian's voice.

"The hunt is over." He said going to his horse. As he looked at that ring, he knew he could not do this to himself and to Mithian. He was going to end this with Mithian. He knew he loved Guinevere and the only woman he was going to marry was her.

xxx

Merlin rushed into the forest and he looked around the he saw her, lying there unconscious and hurt. Her days in exile had been had on her. she looked frail with dark rings on her eyes and her clothes were dirty. Merlin felt pity for her.

He felt guilty for not being there for her. Gwen had come with him to Ealdor when he needed them and she had fought alongside him. She had been a very good friend yet he had watched as she pulled her belongings and left. He could see the haunted hallow look she wore as she left like she had nothing to live for, like her soul was gone and only the body was there. he had seen the same look on Arthur.

He held out his hand and said a spell and watched as her leg healed. It would leave a scar he knew. He sat there and waited till she opened her brown eyes and looked at him before she flinched, scrambled from him her eyes wide with fear and she said, "Who are you?"

There it is. Gwen lost her memories. What is Merlin going to do?

A question for you. do you want Merlin to take her to Camelot or to Ealdor? Review or PM with your suggestion.

Thank you for reading!