Author Note – Just a little thing that popped in my head. Spoilers for seasons 1-7. No season 8 spoilers.

Dear assorted Doctor Who writers,

First off – thank you for an excellent show, I'm totally hooked. Second, I would also like to thank you for ruining the following things for me –

1 - Shop mannequins – I thought they were creepy before Rose – thanks for making that worse.

2 - Downing Street – thanks to you I now think of how it could possibly be filled with weird beings trying to destroy the – wait. Never mind that one's true.

3 - Museums – what if some of those artefacts are alien things that could be used to take over the world? What if there's an alien hiding somewhere? Disregard that one – thanks to The Time of Angels I now think of the Doctor keeping score in museums.

4 - Gas masks – this item of safety is now creepy.

5 - Cardiff – waaaaay too many things happen there. It is definitely not safe. Although if Jack lives there….

6 - New Earth – the source of another reason to hate spiders. Thanks.

7 - Old houses out in the middle of nowhere – who knows what is going on out there.

8 - Teacher's offices.

9 - Clocks. I used to find clockwork toys quaint and amusing, not any more.

10 - Black holes, drilling into planets and writing that I can't translate.

11 - Bluetooth headsets – yeah, we all know what scene I'm talking about. Eugh.

12 - Scarecrows are now a whole new level of creepy.

13 - Decorative angel statues. I used to like these, they were graceful, beautiful and peaceful. Not anymore. Now they are creepy, horrifying and I can't go anywhere near them. Thanks.

14 - I am already terrified of wasps – thanks for making that worse.

15 - Shadows are also extra creepy now.

16 - People copying me – once an exercise in who could be the most stubborn it is now creepy.

17 - Chinese fortune tellers – who knows what they really want.

18 - Videos and pictures of stone angels – yep. You ruined that too.

19 - Would it be wrong to put old people who live too long?

20 - Different coloured grass – once a curious oddity, now something to be wary of.

21 - My perfectly normal neighbours are now under suspicion.

22 - A certain lakeside in Utah.

23 - Monks.

24 - Eye patches.

25 - Thanks to Night Terrors I am now even more reluctant to use lifts.

26 - Also Closing Time has made going in lifts harder to keep calm about. Though imagining the Doctor telling me he loves does help.

27 - Eggs. I can't think or hear the word eggs without wanting to add a few extra syllables.

28 - Small black cubes.

29 - The Statue of Liberty – way to go.

30 - Now, you would think I'd hate snowmen now but thanks to you I have a new way to creep out my sister. Awesome.

31 - Unknown wi-fi connections.

32 - I also have another reason to hate alarm clocks.

33 - Waxwork figures.

34 - Top hats.

35 - Snow and angel statues together. A situation to be avoided at all costs.

So thanks Doctor Who writers. You have managed to ensnare me completely and despite the chance of adding to this list in the future I still intend on following the Doctor's many adventures.

Yours sincerely

Elysium Phoenix.

Just to be clear I in no way shape or form think old people shouldn't live as long as possible. That one is purely for the hilarity.