Author's note: I really meant to post this on Aug. 16th (the 30th anniversary of Elvis's death), but it was 8:20 AM, and I had to leave for vacation (such torture), then I just forgot about it for a couple weeks. So let's just pretend that I posted it on 8/26/07. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully belong to CC and 1013Elvis belongs to uh, himself, I guess.
"I can't believe they've got us investigating vehicular homicide cases," Mulder complained to Scully when she told him about their latest case. A young man walking down the sidewalk had been hit by a car that had run off the road. Fairly straightforward, but very boring.
"Why do you think they call it punishment, Mulder? It's supposed to be boring." Mulder shook his head. She was right. Their reassignment was indeed a punishment for their latest escapade.
"Actually, I've been thinking, and I'm not sure this is really homicide. Maybe the driver saw something, some creature that caused him to run off the road," he suggested after a minute or two of silence.
"You mean like a deer or something?" Scully asked doubtfully.
"Well, I was thinking more along the lines of a werewolf or vampire, but yeah."
"Give it up, Mulder," she said. "This is not an X-File. Now, here's the list of people we're supposed to question." She handed him the list, and he quickly ran through the names.
"Let's see, James Brennan, Marcus Black, Abigail Miller, Elvis Presley-" he muttered under his breath. "Wait," he said aloud. "Elvis Presley?"
"Let me see that," Scully said. She quickly read the list and found that Elvis Presley was in fact on it. "That must be a typos or something."
"(Small town), Ohio," Mulder read, not really paying attention to Scully. "I think we should check it out."
"Mulder! This has to be some kind of mistake, or a joke or something," she insisted.
"But what if it's not, Scully? What if Elvis is really alive and living in Ohio?" He asked.
"Mulder, if this is some kind of hoax, we are going to be in even more trouble," Scully said when they were standing on the porch of an average-looking house in the small town. "And it will be all your fault," she added as he knocked on the door. But thirty seconds later, both she and Mulder were speechless when the door opened and there stood The King himself, dressed in blue jeans and a t-shirt that read "Elvis Lives". Mulder looked at Scully in amazement. Was this real? Scully stared at him. This guy was a pretty convincing impersonator. The two FBI agents stared at each other for a few minutes while Elvis looked at them in amusement. He was apparently used to this type of reaction. Finally, Mulder found his voice.
"Uh, I'm Fox Mulder, and this is Dana Scully," he stammered.
"Nice to meet you. I'm Elvis Presley." Mulder turned to Scully and could tell by the look on her face that she was about to let this guy have it.
"Nice to meet you, too. Would you excuse us for just a minute?" He said quickly.
"Mulder, he can't really be Elvis Presley!" Scully exclaimed when they were sitting in their car.
"How do you know?" Mulder challenged.
"Well, for starters, even if Elvis Presley was alive, he would be in his seventies. This guy looks about 42." Mulder shrugged.
"Well, if he's a fake, he's an extremely convincing one," he said
"I suppose you think he really is the Elvis Presley," Scully replied.
"Yeah, I do." He glanced at Scully and saw her roll her eyes in exasperation. "Look," he continued. "At least check his fingerprints, or get a DNA sample or something."
"Mulder-" she began doubtfully.
"Please?" He gave her his irresistible pleading look. She sighed.
"Okay."
They knocked on the door again, and Elvis opened it.
"Sir, my partner is convinced that you are the Elvis Presley," Scully began. Elvis nodded but looked slightly surprised. Scully continued. "Would you mind if we check your fingerprints and get a DNA sample?"
"Sure, come on in," he replied.
Back in the lab, Scully was puzzled. Surely she had run the tests correctly. While she was examining the results again, Mulder walked in.
"Hey, Scully. How's it going?"
"Well, look at these test results. There must be a mistake." He looked at the printouts detailing the results: a complete match of both fingerprints and DNA between this man and Elvis Presley.
"Wow. This guy is the real deal," he said.
"Mulder, it can't be right," she insisted.
"The tests don't lie, Scully. You're always looking for scientific proof. Do you really believe in science, or just when it proves what you want?" He challenged her. She looked down at the results again.
"You're right. Here it is in black and white, proof that this man really is Elvis Aaron Presley."
There's one more chapter coming, so stay tuned!