Title: Final Fantasy X, Unlimited Edition.
Disclaimer: Hey. Tis Tifa-chan here. :D Everything from here on, I do not own. It belongs to the Squaresoft company. ^^ (But I own some of the corny jokes that might appear here!!) Hehe. ;P
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Chapter 1: Zanarkand
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*The Zanarkand theme song plays in the beginning. You know, the one when Tidus starts walking on the rock and everybody else is gathered around the bonfire? Well, our epic story starts from there…*
(All is gathered around the bonfire, finally making it to Zanarkand. What are they thinking about now?…)
Rikku: ::Sigh:: With a bonfire like this, we should toast marshmallows! ^^
Wakka: ::Giggle:: Lulu's breasts keep popping out… Hehe. And it's a good thing nobody suspects me of looking at them bounce up and down too! =^^=
Lulu: ::Tries to cover her cleavage:: Ugh… That disgusting orange-head blitz ball player… Am I the only one that knows that he keeps looking down here!?
Kimahri: Well, this is another well done paycheck for not doing anything in this scene. ^^\/
Auron: Damn these young kids. In my days, we wouldn't be sitting around here and looking at this blazing light of danger! … What am I talking about? I love the light… *_*
Yuna: When are we going to go make out?…
Tidus: Gosh, why does Yuna have to keep staring at me? Not sexy enough for you, am I!? Well, I'll show you…
(Tidus stands up, walks over to Yuna and puts his hand on Yuna's shoulder. Yuna replied by closing here eyes and touching his hand. Tidus then walks away to climb the rock.)
Tidus: ARGH! ::Slips off::
All: …
Rikku: Umm… You need any help with that? O.o The director did say that he oiled it to make it shiny…
Tidus: No, I do not! U_U Dammit… I need help getting up there! ::Tries again and slips::
All: …
*And so, 15 minutes pass by as Tidus tries to climb up that damn rock. And finally, he makes it.*
Tidus: ::Looks around at the sunset sky:: Listen to my story…
*This is Zanarkand, the birthplace of Tidus. Some fans of his are awaiting for his arrival.*
(Fan girls scream.)
Fan Girl #1: Like, oh my gosh! It's him! It's Tidus!!
Fan Girl #2: Really? Oh my god. It is! OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG.
(Tidus comes over to his fans with a grin on his face.)
Fan Girl #1: OH MY GOSH! TIDUS! YOU ARE SUCH A CUTIE! WILL YOU AUTOGRAPH MY BALL!?
Tidus: Alright.
(Fan Girl #1 hands Tidus the blitz ball.)
Tidus: ::Signs it::
(Fan Girl #2: ::Hands him her blitz ball::
Tidus: ::Signs it too::
Fan Girl #1: Good luck tonight.
Tidus: Thanks.
*The three little boys comes up to Tidus.*
Boy #1: Can you sign my blitz ball? ::Hands one to Tidus::
Tidus: Sure. ::Signs::
Boy #2: Me too!
Tidus: Alright then.
Boy #3: And me!
Tidus: Take it easy.
(Tidus finished signing the blitz balls.)
Boy #1: 1, 2, 3...
Boys: Teach us how to blitz!
Tidus: I can't. I have a game.
Boy #2: Ok. Then how about tomorrow?
Tidus: Sure.
Boy #3: Promise?
Tidus: Promise.
*And Tidus runs off to the big game. And while he was on the way, he sees his father, Jecht's face on a flat screen.*
Tidus: ::Looks up at it and starts to run::
"Last night, I came home soo drunk. I didn't know what to say! Well, there's my son, Tidus; whom I've always loved inside of me. But he was always such a crybaby. That's not a good thing, folks. So anyways, maybe this isn't the time to mention this. But I saw that whore again. She loved me, I loved her and so on!…"
*Tidus finally reaches the dome and sits there in the water, waiting for the game to start. The music starts and all that.. Tidus jumps into the blitz ball stadium and plays his hardest. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah… Yeah. So anyways. Ahem. Sin then attacks, destroying the stadium and leaving some escaping survivors. Tidus is one of them.*
Tidus: what the fuck was that? I was gonna score that shit god dammit… ::Squints to see a swaying figure in red:: Auron? ::Runs over to it:: Auron! What are you still doing here?
Auron: Hmm? ::Turns:: Hic!
Tidus: …Are you, drunk?…
Auron: WHAT WANTS TO KNOW, HUH!? Hic! ::Faints::
Tidus: Umm… Auron?…
Auron: ::Stands up, completely normal this time:: Ok. Let's get this show on the road, boy.
Tidus: ?…
Auron: We go this way, fight Sin and then you get transported to a beach. Alright?
Tidus: Umm… Ok.
Auron: Good. Now follow me. ::Starts walking::
Tidus: ::Follows::
*And so, they meet up with a Sinspawn. And, they beat it. Moving on to the next one. They beat it. And here comes that big one.*
Tidus: Ugh. What the fuck is that!? O_o
Auron: It's a sinspawn you moron…
Tidus: Apparently a big one too…
Auron: Well, I shall show you the Overdrive.
Tidus: … The what?
Auron: Some gay name Squaresoft gave us in replacement of Limit Break.
Tidus: Oh. Alright then.
Auron: Ahem. HWUAAA!! ::Uses Dragon Blade:: Ta da!
Tidus: Sugoi… O.O But it's still not dead. ::Points::
Auron: Aaw. Darn it!
*And so, they fight it and then reaches the other Sinspawns. Todus makes the bridge blow up, and then Tidus hangs onto a cliff for dear life.*
Tidus: Ugh. Auron! AURON! GOD DAMN YOU, YOU OLD BASTARD! HELP ME OUT HERE!
Auron: … And just for that, I ain't helping you. U_U But…it is in the script. So, ahem. ::Grabs Tidus by his shirt collar:: This, is your story. ::Lets him go::
Tidus: AAAAAAAAH!!!…
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