So, here is my attempt on a song fic. Hmm. Ah well. The song is Iridescent by Linkin Park, listen to it, it's beautiful! Thank you Artemisdesari for making me listen to it! You seem to have great influence over my fic writing atm ;)
And no, I own nothing, neither song lyrics nor characters. Too bad…
Warnings? Well, Dark!Godstiel I suppose.
And possibly bad writing. Enjoy!
~SPN~
You were standing in the wake of devastation
And you were waiting on the edge of the unknown
And with the cataclysm raining down
Insides crying "Save me now"
You were there, impossibly alone
The world was burning, and there was hardly any life left on Earth. The ranks of angels were also considerably thinned, and only the ones blindly loyal and obedient were left.
The self-proclaimed God stood in an abandoned storage building, broken glass from shattered windows at his feet, and blood staining both the floor in front of him and his clothes. The blood of the last man who had once been his friend, almost like his brother, when he still was the angel named Castiel. When he still had feelings, he had considered this man his family. And now he had killed him, and even though he had done it without a real second thought, all the windows shattered and all the lights went out. And the pain he felt was like nothing he had ever experienced.
Deep inside him, something deeply buried in Purgatory souls, writhed and screamed in agony and grief. The last trace of his angelic grace, encased in all the souls, shone through for a second, and Castiel suddenly felt a pang of loss and sorrow. Dean Winchester was dead by his hand, and there, for a moment, he was not Castiel the God, but Castiel the Angel who had once loved a human more than anything. And Castiel the Angel mourned the death of that man, and loathed Castiel the God for killing him.
And in a burst of light that blinded every angel
As if the sky had blown the heavens into stars
You felt the gravity of tempered grace
Falling into empty space
No one there to catch you in their arms
The angelic grace flickered and imploded in a bright burst of light, and all the stars went dark, and the only light was the dying grace of Castiel the angel.
And Castiel the God and Castiel the Angel was brought to his knees by the pain, and his scream was heard all over the world. He screamed for what he had lost, and what he had become. And then the light went out and the only one left in the building was Castiel the God, kneeling on the blood stained floor with all the souls of Purgatory swirling inside him, but without the grace that had once been his very essence.
Castiel the Angel was gone, and there was only Castiel the God, full of rage and hatred, without any love for anything at all.
And Castiel the God left the abandoned building, not sparing a thought to the man he had killed, or the angel who now was gone. He left to watch the world burn, finally all alone after killing the last man who wanted to save him.
Do you feel cold and lost in desperation?
You build up hope, but failure's all you've known
Remember all the sadness and frustration
And let it go. Let it go
He remembered the time before he became God, all frustration over the war going badly, the feeling of disgust when working with Crowley, and most of all the frustration and sadness bordering on despair over Dean's refusal to listen, to understand.
But he remembers without feeling, and not even or a second does he envy Castiel the Angel's ability to feel and love. He watches the world burn, and he feels nothing. Everything he ever loved and cared for is gone, but it does not matter to him anymore, because every little trace of Castiel the Angel is gone, and Castiel the God does not feel anything but rage and lust for vengeance.
And the world burns, and blood stains everything once beautiful and pure.
And Castiel the God watches with cold eyes and his face impassive, because now there is nothing in him that can feel any good and pure.
So Castiel the God stands alone, with no one left that he can trust, let alone love, and feels nothing as the world burns and the end draws ever nearer.
Let it go
Let it go
Let it go
Let it go
~SPN~
Please review?