Dedicated to Count von Count.

Warning: This is so AU. Bella the B has never come to Forks. This is slash. Screw the canon! EdwardMike fluff, boys kissing

Far Too Shy to Speak to You at School

I found myself chewing on the pencil, again. A habit I should quit. I know it's irritating and kind of gross but I can't help chewing on my pencil when I'm sitting in the Trigonometry class and when I'm bored and when Edward Cullen is sitting directly in front of me. When I see his perfectly untidy bronze hair at the back of his head. When I know that an unruly strand must be hanging across his left eye. When I see his pale skin at the back of his neck, just above the collar of his black shirt. When I know that it feels smooth and icy. When I see his lean frame. When I know how strong his arms must feel when they are holding you close to him.

The bell rang. The lesson was over. He did not turn once to look at me, though he must have felt my eyes staring at the back of his head the whole time. The moment he got up, I lowered my gaze to the sheets of paper on my desk. When I looked up, he had left the room. I sighed and turned my eyes towards the door, not actually seeing anything as the one thing I wanted to see was not there.

I got up, put on a fake smile and talked to my friends while leaving the classroom.

I saw him in the hallway. He was standing at his locker, talking to his sister. I felt his eyes moving my way as I passed him, laughing with my friends, only looking at their smiling faces, not wanting to catch a glimpse of his perfect angelic features.

English is the loneliest language in the world as none of its millions of words can be a substitute for him. Why should I remember anything of a lesson, an hour of my life, in which he was not present?

I knew that he would not sit at my table at lunch. All seats were already taken by my friends. And I chatted with them, laughed with them and did not for once turn my head towards the table where he was sitting with his family. And the whole time I did not think of him, did not think about his golden eyes that could see right into your soul, did not think about his pale and cool and hard lips that so seldom curled up into a smile, yet when they do and when that smile is directed at you, it makes you feel the one and only person to deserve it. I did not think about how easily our fingers could have touched by coincidence when we were waiting in the queue and both of us might reach out for the same plate at the same time. I did not think about the cool shivers that this touch might have caused. I did not think about how this cold sensation would immediately turn into hot waves running through my body. I did not think about him at all.

After school I saw him standing next to his Volvo. For a moment I thought he was looking at me. For a moment I thought his lips were moving in an attempt to form a word. For a moment I thought that this word was my name. Yet, most of the time I was glad that he would not do such a thing. A thing that would make me feel awkward. I was almost afraid of my reaction to it. So I was glad that he did not look my way when I got into my car and drove away.

I spent the afternoon in our store sitting at the counter, trying to concentrate on my homework. Yet, every time I heard the slightly squeaking sound of the shop door opening, my heart stopped beating for an instance before I looked up, only to see some grey-bearded hiker with his rucksack entering our store.

I talked a lot at dinner and ate all my vegetables, just to please my mom and to avoid my dad's looks and his frowning while commenting on my clothes or my hairstyle.

I watched TV a little, yawning most of the time. So I decided to go to bed early that night. I took a shower and the hot water running down my body was a bliss. If only it could wash away my thoughts and feelings as easily as my sweat.

When I came into my room from the adjoining bathroom, a sudden breeze made me shiver, forming little goose bumps on my bare chest. My hand held fast to the towel around my narrow hips. I wondered when I had left the window open, while crossing the room. I looked through it, yet only seeing the blackness of the night, feeling the cold evening wind in my face, playing with my wet blond curls. I shut the window and was startled, as I saw not only the reflection of my own puzzled face in the glass but another very pale one above my shoulder. I spun my head round and gasped.

It was him.

What -? I could not utter a syllable. I just stared at him with my mouth open. And he stared back with those golden eyes of his.

He moved a step closer and I retreated only to find my back pressed against the cold glass.

I felt my heart beating, I almost heard the blood rushing through my veins. I saw that my chest was heaving. When I raised my head again, I met his eyes. He was standing only inches away from me. I tried to compose myself, tried to slow down my heartbeat, tried to calm my breathing, tried to at least not stare with my mouth wide open at his beautiful face.

His right hand moved up, coming close to my face.

What are you doing here?

He stopped his hand. Looking down into my wide blue eyes.

I could not help thinking how much I longed for his touch.

For the briefest of moments his lips curled up into a one-sided smile. Then I felt them on mine, cold, hard, eager, making me breathless.

His hand cupped my face, holding it close to his, or was I moving forward?

His other hand ever so softly touched my chest. His icy fingers tracing idly along the naked skin, teasing the muscles.

My heart literally stopped when he placed his cold palm directly above it. He must have felt that, as he broke the kiss suddenly, leaving my mouth open, gasping for air. And the air that I breathed was the sweetest that had ever filled my lungs. His cool breath was all over my face. I had my eyes closed and was instinctively drawn to his lips again.

Their coldness surprised me again. And though they were hard as stone, they moved so softly on mine. His slick tongue touched my lips, was tracing along them, teasing them.

I could not move. One of my hands still grabbed the fabric of the towel around my hips. The other hand wanted to touch, wanted to feel him, feel if he was real or just a dream.

His tongue parted my lips, not forcefully but tenderly. And my mouth was more than willing to welcome it. When the tip of his tongue touched my tongue, it felt so cold but it didn't make me move away. It tasted so sweet. I couldn't help moaning at that moment, opening my mouth a little more, allowing his cool wet tongue to dive into it.

It moved inside my mouth so gently, yet so passionately. My lips, my tongue, my whole body reacted to his kiss that satisfied me in a yet unknown way and made me crave for more at the same time.

Slowly, very slowly did his tongue slid out of my mouth. Slowly, very slowly did he unlock our lips. Slowly, very slowly did I open my eyes.

I felt his one hand still touching my face. The other one was resting on the bare skin at my hip.

For another unreal moment I stared at him, my heartbeat only slowly, very slowly returning to a normal pace.

My moistened lips opened, a single word escaped them. "Why?" My voice was weak. "Why did you never say a word? Why did you ignore me at school?"

"I ignore you?" He closed his eyes, then opened them again, looking directly into mine. "I – was far too shy to speak to you at school. You leave me numb and I'm not sure why. I find it easier to sit and stare than push my limbs out towards you right there. My heart is bursting in your perfect eyes, as blue as oceans and as pure as skies…"

A/N I hope you enjoyed my little fluffy fic. Oh, if anyone didn't get it, it was supposed to be Edward and Mike's first kiss… And Edward is quoting Snow Patrol's wonderful song "Spitting Games" at the end. I love that song. So I guess it's kind of a songfic…