I'M BACK! Exams are over, and I have OFFICIALLY finished my junior year of high school. One more year and I will GRADUATE. Anyway, I'm going to celebrate the start of my final year of high school with a fic (: enjoy
Disclaimer: No I don't own Harry Potter, I am not JK Rowling, but in years I will have a book that is mine.
Sunday, September 17th
2:37am
"Hold this!"
"Evans!"
"Lily!"
I started and looked up quickly as I heard my first name being yelled, pulling my eyes away from the scene in front of me. What is that, you ask?
It's the body of James Potter. That's right. And there's blood. Everywhere.
Saturday, September 16th
11:00am
The library is a really great place to think, you know? I know that sounds incredibly obvious, well, because it is, but still! It's so calm, and quiet, and peaceful. No stupid boys, no stupid girls, no stupid fan girls of Black and Potter. It's lovely in here. I swear, I could live in here.
"Have you seen James?"
Never mind.
"Huh?" I said, looking up at the person who had addressed me, all lovely thoughts about libraries and peace floating out of my mind as I saw none other than Sirius Black. I peered behind him, and, predictably, saw a few fan girls giggling after him. Typical.
Why did he have to come in here and destroy my peace? Honestly, he had no consideration for others.
"I asked if you had seen James anywhere," he said, snapping me out of my mental tirade against him.
"This is the library," I stated bluntly, and he grinned, "So no, I have not seen him in here," I said, and looked back down at my textbook, which had just been sitting there pointlessly since I'd opened it an hour ago, since when I had just sat here thinking about the joys of the library.
I need to get a life.
Heck, I need friends.
That's right, I have none. My best friend in the whole wide world, Alice, was Head Girl last year, my predecessor, and graduated, leaving me all by my lonesome, friendless. Don't get me wrong, people like me. And I don't mean to sound like Potter by saying this, but they do!
They just don't understand me. I'm pretty complicated.
"Fair point," Black said, and winked, "But do you have any idea where he'd be?" he asked desperately, and I frowned at him.
"How would I know?"
"Well, he is Head Boy, and you are, if I'm correct, Head Girl," he said, and I rolled my eyes.
"No, for the last time, I don't know where he is," I said and Black nodded, before sitting down next to me, "What the bloody hell do you think you're doing?" I asked, turning to face him, my hair accidentally whacking him in the face. I turned quickly, okay?
"No need to maim me woman," he muttered, holding his face where my wet ponytail had whacked it. I rolled my eyes, trying to cover up the fact that my lips were threatening to pull up into a smile, "And what the bloody hell does it look like I'm doing?" he said, smirking slightly, "I'm sitting."
The fan girls, who were, of course, in hearing range, giggled madly at this, and I rolled my eyes, turning back to my textbook as Black turned around to face them, causing them to fall silent, and winked at them, "You really shouldn't lead them on like that," I said quietly, pulling my quill and ink bottle towards me.
"Ah, and where's the fun in that?" he asked me, and I felt my stomach twist with disgust. Why was I sitting next to him again?
Oh right, I didn't have to.
But I like the library! I whined to myself, Peace and quiet! Remember?
The girls started to giggle and whisper as Black stretched his arms above his head, causing all muscles in his arms to stretch.
Peace and quiet my arse.
I slammed my textbook shut and shoved all of my stuff into my shoulder bag, before standing up, "Where are you going?" Black asked me, and I glared down at him
"I can't sit here with you and your bloody fan club," I said, pushing the chair I had been sitting in under the table. Black grinned at me and stood up, and I gave him a rather irritated look.
"You cant sit anywhere else with me without them being there," he said, and I gave him a blank look, to show that I was not amused, before walking out. I stopped quickly, and then walked back, "Miss me?" Black asked suggestively.
I, of course, ignored him, and turned to his fan club, "If I were you, I'd take a picture, they last longer," I said, causing them to fall silent, "And also, this is the library," I said, gesturing around at the big, quiet, beautiful…did I mention how much I love the library? I shook my head and looked back at the girls, who were looking at me expectantly, "Right. This is the library, you're supposed to be quiet in here," I said, and they looked at me with large bush baby eyes, "Honestly how stupid are you?" I mumbled, so nobody could hear me.
Of course, Black heard me, and he coughed.
His cough snapped me out of my irritation at his fan club. I was Head Girl! What was I doing? I turned away from them quickly and walked swiftly to the entrance of the library and stormed out, shutting the door angrily behind me.
Saturday, September 16th
12:00pm
"So, I heard you kicked some fan girl arse," I looked up quickly at the source of the words that had snapped me out of my happy internal monologue about the advantages of wearing sneakers in comparison to those bloody wedged heels that the fan girls wore.
Don't ask why I'm so bloody obsessed with them. They just bother me, to no end. Probably because they have some massive grudge against me, particularly Potter's fan girls. Not that I care. But ever since third year when those fan clubs began existing, they've bothered me. I think it just depresses me that my gender can be so pathetic. No wonder people thought us weak back in the day. Women, I mean.
I mean, if we've come so far from all that, what's the point of letting men believe that we're weak again. Honestly it's so stupid.
"Er, Lily?" I blinked and found myself looking at Remus Lupin, who was waving a hand in front of my face. Whoops. I guess I'd been staring at him whilst thinking about feminism.
"Right! Hello, sorry," I said, and he smiled. I've always liked Remus, he's just so nice, and selfless. No, I don't have feelings for him, or whatever. He has his own little fan club as well; comprised of squealing, high heel wearing, reason for feminism girls. Anyway, see, back to the fan girls thing! Honestly I'm going insane.
"Distracted?" he asked gently, and I shook my head, causing him to raise one skeptical eyebrow. Why do people call them skeptical eyebrows? It's not like the bloody eyebrow has any feelings.
I seriously have to control my mental tirades.
"A little," I said, giving in to the bloody eyebrow, and he nodded knowingly
"Anyway, I was just going to ask, have you seen James?" he asked, and I shook my head
"Ask Black, he was looking for him an hour ago," I said, and Remus nodded, frowning slightly, "Why?"
"It's nothing," he chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck, not unlike the way Potter did. Maybe it was something one picked up after being around someone who did that so often, "We're playing a game," he admitted, after my skeptical eyebrow did something about it.
Good eyebrow
"Then I can't help you, can I?" I said, "That would be cheating." Remus laughed, good-naturedly
"It would," he admitted, nodding, "But I really need to find him,"
"Why?" I asked curiously, and he bit his lip
"Er, well, you see Lily, today's a, erm, special day," he said, and I frowned
"What, is he getting married or something?" I snorted, unattractively, may I add, and Remus grinned.
"Would you be jealous?" he teased, and I felt my jaw fall open
"What?" I asked, and Remus's eyes widened
"Oh! Oh no! You don't like him?" he whispered, and I shook my head vigorously. Me? Like Potter? PAH!
"Why would you think that?" I squeaked, and he bit his lip
"Oh Merlin Lily I'm so sorry. I just assumed," he trailed off, and then looked away, "Well since you haven't seen him, I better go. Urgent business," he said, before sprinting away, leaving me absolutely irritated.
Saturday, September 16th
1:00pm
"I mean! Can you believe that?" I asked, "He said that I liked Potter! Potter, Alice. It's RIDICULOUS!"
"Whom are you talking to?" I turned abruptly to see Marlene Jensen, one of my dorm mates, walking in to the dorm, looking around for who I was ranting to.
"Er"
"You're so funny," she giggled, before blowing me a kiss and walking out of the dorm, closing the door with a click
"Then why the bloody hell did she come in here in the first place?" I screeched, turning around to continue my pacing, "No! No! You have to say what happened before writing that down," I said to the charmed quill, which stopped and looked at me, before scribbling something out and continuing to write. Well, assuming it could look at me and had conscious thought.
This is how I write to Alice. It's so much easier than actually sitting down and writing things down. This way, I don't suffer the writers' block that comes along with writing to your friend. And this way, she gets to experience my thought process. It's so useful. That is one spell I am never ever going to forget. It's so useful.
"Anyway, where was I? Right," I cleared my throat, "How could he think I liked Potter? What is this?" I screeched, "I don't!" I said, turning to look at the quill, "I really don't! I don't! I don't, I don't, I don't!" I stomped my foot angrily.
"Seriously, what are you doing?" Marlene laughed, walking into the dorm, closing the door behind her
"Er, nothing," I mumbled, twirling the end of my ponytail in between my shoulder blades. She looked at me for a couple seconds, and then looked towards my bed, where the quill was still standing.
"Whatever," she giggled, before heading to the bathroom. I sighed, and flopped onto my bed, grabbing the quill. The spell was undone as soon as I touched it. I bit my lip and continued to write, ranting on the piece of paper.
Sorry, Marlene walked in and now I have to write manually. Ridiculous. Anyways, where was I? RIGHT. I DON'T! I really don't!
I mean. I don't think. Do I? He has gotten nicer, and he's not irritating anymore. I actually don't mind spending time with him. But doesn't that just mean we're friends? That I don't loathe him anymore. Doesn't mean I love him. This is ridiculous. People can't just make ASSUMPTIONS.
I DON'T like him that way Alice. I don't. Don't give me the damn skeptical eyebrow. I DON'T like James Potter. And that will never change.
Saturday, September 16th
2:00pm
"Lily!" I turned around, my hair slapping my face, and saw Peter Pettigrew running towards me. He stopped when he was in front of me, breathing heavily, holding his side. Honestly, he was the most pathetic of the seventh year Gryffindor boys, and that's saying something, because that's in league with Potter and Black, and they're pretty pathetic.
"Yes?" I said, after a few minutes of him panting, clutching his side.
"Have…you…have you seen…"
"Potter?" I asked, looking at him blankly, and his head snapped up to look at me with wide eyes.
"How…how did you"
"Know? Well you're the third person to ask me that today," I said, and I saw a grin flash across Pettigrew's face.
"Sirius and Remus already got to you then?" he chuckled, and I strongly restrained an eye roll. I swear, maybe he was Captain Obvious in disguise at Hogwarts.
Instead, being the polite Head Girl I am, well, out loud anyway, I chose to say, "Yes,"
"Alright, well, thanks," he said, before gasping largely and standing up, "I'll see you around then," he smiled, before turning around and sprinting off, his gasps for air echoing in the deserted hallway of the secret passageway. How do I know about it, you ask? Well, I am the Head Girl to James Potter's Head Boy, and he knows the passageways. Patrolling with him pretty much enabled me to discover the entire castle, and let me tell you, there was a lot I didn't know.
I heard a chuckle and turned around quickly, only to see a statue. I shrugged it off. Maybe I was imagining things. Wouldn't be the first time.
"Pssssst!" I turned quickly.
"Lily!" I turned around again. I definitely wasn't imagining it now. I looked around at the empty hallway and then took a breath, before walking to the statue. It was the only one possible. I walked towards the statue, looked behind it, and jumped
"Potter?"
He stepped out from behind the statue and grinned at me, leaning against the side of it, "Hello Lily," he sung, crossing his arms over his chest. Which was extremely well toned. He crossed it with his arms, which, may I say, are very attractive. I often find myself daydreaming about them.
"What?" I squeaked, and Potter's eyebrows shot up. Honestly, what was going on with people's eyebrows today?
"What what?" he asked, smiling slightly.
"Er, nothing," I said, playing with the end of my ponytail, wondering how Potter's arms had entered my mind.
"What's got you nervous Lils?" he asked, cocking his head to the side, smiling slightly. Have I mentioned how nice his eyes look behind those glasses, which, strangely, make him look really, and I mean really, attractive?
Oh good god. Oh no, oh no, oh no! These thoughts can mean only one thing.
"Nervous? I'm not nervous!" I laughed, a nervous laugh unfortunately, twirling the end of my ponytail like mad, "I'm spiffy!"
"Spiffy?" Potter said skeptically, grinning, "You're spiffy?"
"Yep," I said, nodding frantically. Where the hell are people when you need them? Pettigrew was here not five minutes ago!
"No you're not," Potter grinned, still leaning against the statue so he was the same height as me, "you always twirl your ponytail when you're nervous," he pointed out, and I frowned at him
"How do you know that?" I shot back defensively. Now that I knew I fancied him, I couldn't let anyone else find out. I am not ashamed to admit that I was extremely satisfied when Potter's skin turned red.
"Er, well, I did fancy you for 6 years," he said, red, but looking me in the eye. I couldn't look away. He pushed off the statue so that he was not only standing extremely close to me, but he was now a head taller than me, so I had to crane my neck back to look at him, "You know what?" he said quietly, stepping even bloody closer, "I always wanted to do one thing," he said, looking down at me
"W-what?" I mentally kicked myself for stammering when a smirk appeared on his face.
"I've always wanted to-" he whispered, even closer to me. Oh Merlin he was going to kiss me. I saw his hand hover by my waist for a second through the corner of my eye.
"They're looking for you!" I blurted out, stepping back quickly so I slammed into the wall. Potter looked towards me, slowly, with a knowing smile on his face, "Black! Remus! And, and Pettigrew!" I stammered, stepping to the side, away from him.
"I know," he said, still giving me that intense look with his knowing smile.
"Y-you should go find them," I said, looking into his eyes. He held my gaze and slowly made his way over to me. I would've run but I couldn't. See, something was wrong with my knees. They were wobbling. Bloody hell. Why are all the effects of love so negative?
WHAT? Love? Where did that come from?
"I should," he said, standing extremely close to me yet again, nodding slowly. I found myself nodding along with him. He took a step closer to me and put his hand on the side of my face.
"HA!" I whipped around quickly, while Potter continued to look at me, to see Black, Remus and Pettigrew storming towards us. I took a step away from Potter, who dropped his hand quickly and took a step back, putting a reasonable gap between us, "EVANS!" Black laughed happily, throwing his arm around my shoulder, "You found him!"
"Er, right," I said awkwardly, grabbing the end of my ponytail. I saw Potter smile slightly as I did this.
"Well done Lily," Remus smiled, "I didn't know you were playing!"
"I'm not," I said earnestly, stepping out from under Black's arm. Who knows where that has been?
"Shame," Black said sadly, and then looked over at Potter, grinning, "My turn!"
"I doubt anyone would bother looking for you," I mumbled, and Black looked at me, jaw wide open, while Remus and Pettigrew roared with laughter. Potter was smiling at me.
"Evans! That's so mean!" he said, and I cocked my head to the side, feeling guilty
"I'm sorry," I said, and then looked at Remus, my gaze flickering to Potter for a second
"I'm sorry about what I said earlier," Remus said awkwardly, and I giggled at the irony, causing all of them to look at me curiously. I've always been a fan of irony, for the record. Its just so, well, ironic!
"What did you say earlier?" Black asked excitedly, bouncing up and down happily.
"Nothing," I said quickly, and Remus nodded knowingly, "For the record, I hate irony," I said, giving Remus a meaningful look, and I saw his eyes widen, and a grin light his face
"I'd say I'm rather partial to it myself," he grinned, winking, and I flushed. That's right. I actually flushed.
"I've got to, you know, that," I said, gesturing wildly with my free hand, and Remus laughed, "Oh bugger off," I hissed, before shoving around him and power walking down the hall
"It'll be our secret Lily!"
Saturday, September 16th
5:00pm
So I finally left the sanctuary of the library, after hiding for the past three hours. I'd come here straight after the little encounter with the boys. The library, as I've already stated, is an amazing place. Peaceful. Calm. Quiet. Everything a girl needs after discovering she's fallen for her nemesis.
Okay, that's a bit harsh. My nemesis is Voldemort, and there will be no falling in love there. Potter is just, er, he's like a mole. Yes! He's a mole, on my face. My face being symbolic to my life. Yes! He's a mole on my life. It's disgusting, and you want to get rid of it, but if you really consider it, it adds beauty and an edge on life. And you end up really liking that mole. Like, it makes your life or face or whatever look whole. It wouldn't look right without the mole. Like, what's her face, Marylyn Monroe. Yes! The mole is essential. So I should keep the mole.
Merlin I'm going insane. I am comparing Potter, to a facial blemish. When his face is anything but. Oh no! You know what I am now? I'm a fan girl!
"I'm going to faint. I'm just going to fall over, and die," I mumbled, and heard a bark
"I'll catch you," Black said, turning up beside me, causing me to squeak, "Well, I wont, but Prongs will," he said, and I rolled my eyes, trying to hide my thumping heart, twisting stomach and sweaty palms. Seriously, though, why are all the symptoms of love so wrong?
"Funny," I muttered, "Aren't you supposed to be hiding?" I asked, and he grinned
"Nice to know you pay attention to our lives darling," he said, shoving his hands in his pockets. I turned around quickly to see a few tittering fourth years behind us.
"Honestly, don't they get annoying?" I asked, and he looked down at me, and then behind him quickly, causing some giggling, before facing front and shrugging
"All the time," he said, and I grinned, "But I never feel alone," he said, and I felt my stomach clench. That word really got to me nowadays, "You okay?" he asked, suddenly concerned, stopping. He grabbed my sleeve and pulled me to a stop, turning me to face him, "Merlin, Evans, I didn't mean that in a bad way, don't cry!" he said desperately, conjuring up a handkerchief and wiping my face. I hadn't realized I was crying.
"What did you do?" I squeaked as Potter's voice suddenly sounded behind me, obviously followed by a few obnoxious giggles. I frowned; where were the fan girls when Potter almost kissed me? Odd
"I didn't do anything!" Black said, looking behind me at Potter with a frantic look in his eye, "I was just talking and she suddenly started crying!" he said. Potter turned up beside him and looked at me, and I felt my heart thud.
Not the time, heart!
"What's wrong?" Potter asked, putting his hand comfortingly on my shoulder, causing tingles to flow all down my arm. I brought my hands up quickly and wiped my tears away. Damn Black just had to mention loneliness. I had tried so hard not to let anyone know how lonely I was.
"M'fine," I mumbled, looking anywhere but at Potter and Black, and the fan girls.
"No, you're not," Potter said sternly, and then turned to Black, "I've got this," he said, and Black nodded, before throwing me one last worried look and walking away, followed 'inconspicuously' by his mob of fan girls. At least he'd never be alone. At this thought, a sob shook my body. Drat it!
"M'fine! Really!" I said earnestly through my sobs, but Potter rolled his eyes, and, keeping a firm grip on my arm, led me to a secret passageway. I could hear the tittering girls following after us, but, as soon as Potter turned into the secret passageway, they disappeared, "What?" I said, looking around, and Potter grinned
"They don't know about the passageways," he said, and I nodded dumbly, wiping my face. He stopped and then pushed me against the wall of the hallway, turning to face me, arms crossed, so I had no escape, "What's wrong?"
"Nothing! I told you I'm fine!" I said, but he didn't move
"Is this about before?" he asked, and I looked at him questioningly, "About the almost kiss?" he asked, slightly nervously, and my eyes widened
"N-no! No! That wasn't wrong or anything," I said, and I saw a small smile appear on his face, but he thankfully let me continue, "it was something Black said," I said, pulling my hair out of it's ponytail so I could play with the ends of it
"What did he say?" Potter asked quietly.
"It wasn't anything wrong," I said to my hair, which was actually a really good listener, "He was just talking about the fan girls," I said, and Potter chuckled
"The whats?" he asked
"Fan girls," I shrugged, "Those tittering morons who follow you boys around all the time," I said, waving my hand dismissively, "I asked him if it bothered him and he said it did but that he was never alone," I stopped, my voice breaking on the last word. Potter seemed to get it though
"Is this about Alice?" he asked quietly, and my head snapped up to look him in the eye. Okay, now how did he know that?"
"How do you?"
"It's pretty obvious," he said, nervously, looking at me, "that you miss her, I mean."
"I do," I said quietly, feeling the tears trying to overflow. Oh come on! So many times that I could've cried over being alone, and I choose to do it now? In front of Potter?
"I'm sorry," he said quietly, "I've never been alone," he said, and I bit my quivering lip, "But I know people who have, and I'm so incredibly sorry," he said, and I nodded quickly. Maybe if I nodded really fast my head would look like a blur and he wouldn't be able to see my eyes tearing up.
Suddenly, his arms, those gorgeous arms, were wrapped around me in a comforting hug. My arms were pinned awkwardly to my sides as he hugged me, saying soothing things. I felt, well, I didn't feel lonely anymore. I shifted my arms so that they were wrapped around his waist instead.
When he finally let me go, about five minutes later, I wiped my eyes quickly and looked up at him, "Thanks Potter," I said, and attempted to walk away, but felt a tug on my sleeve
"Potter?" he asked, smirking, "After everything we've been through today, you're going to call me 'Potter'?"
"I've always called you Potter," I pointed out, not wanting to fall for him in front of his face, if that made any sense.
"Yes, but you haven't always let me hug you or almost let me kiss you or told me important stuff and let me comfort you," he said, and I felt my breath catch. Had all of that really happened today?
"So?" I said, slightly choked.
"It's James," he smiled, and I bit my lip, "Come on! I call you Lily!" he said, nudging me playfully, and I chuckled.
"Leave me alone…James"
Saturday, September 16th
7:30pm
So, I spent the last two and a half hours with James, Sirius, Remus and Peter. Miraculously, they've all gained first names in my eyes. That's how amazing they've been to me. I don't know what changed, but after I walked away from James after the whole 'Lily is lonely' conversation, I ended up running into Remus, who screamed and hid behind me as something came flying. I turned quickly, only to be knocked over by Sirius, followed by James, claiming that I had to join their bloody hide-and-seek game now that I'd helped them find two people.
So I did.
Peter had been hiding next, and James had said that he wouldn't be too hard to find. And he was right. Peter is, as I've always claimed, the most pathetic. Although now he's a friend of mine. James, Sirius, Remus and I had all searched as a group to find Peter, who we'd found hiding in between sofa cushions in the Common Room.
Sirius Black then lectured me for a half hour about addressing him by his first name, until I finally gave in, and now, I address all of them by their first names. What difference a day can make!
So, back to my theory. James is still the mole, only, now, I've been told that it can never be removed. That's right, I don't think I can ever remove it. I'm stuck with this mole forever. Only now, I've learned to like it. Wait, correction, I've learned to love it.
Saturday, September 16th
8:30pm
"So, Lily Evans, how do you like eating dinner with the Marauders?" Sirius said, spreading his arms wide and slapping James and Peter in the faces with the back of his hands. I giggled as they threw him dirty looks, along with some of the food on their plates. Sirius picked up a handful of mashed potatoes and I decided to step in. I'm Head Girl after all.
"Stop," I said, "Sirius! Put, the potatoes, down," I said calmly, as if talking to a toddler, and Sirius slowly obeyed, after much coaxing from my end, and eventually placed the damn mashed potatoes back on his plate, "Now, what is a Marauder?" I asked, grinning, and I saw Sirius throw James an exasperated look, which James responded with an eyebrow raise.
"US!" Sirius said, "We're the Marauders! Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs!" he said happily, and I sighed.
"Well done," Remus said to me, ignoring Sirius's 'Marauder' outburst, impressed, "you're the only person who's ever been able to stop Pads from doing something like throwing food," he grinned, and I rolled my eyes
"I thought that's why you were prefect? And why he's Head Boy," I said, gesturing to James.
"Yes, and that failed, so here you are," Remus said, grinning, "It's a sign!" he winked. I frowned at him, but he only nodded towards Peter, who had a light in his eye,
"It's a sign! Oh MERLIN!" Peter squeaked, before getting up and sprinting out of the Great Hall.
"He loves signs," James said, rather obviously
"And omens," Sirius added
"And signals," Remus said
"And-"
"I get it," I laughed, cutting James off.
"So Lils, you're in a significantly better mood," Sirius said conversationally, digging into his food.
"I know why," Remus said, grinning, and I gasped, whacking him in the shoulder as he nudged me.
"What?" James asked curiously, through his mouthful of Sheppard's pie.
"Why?" I really wish I hadn't looked at Sirius, as a bit of food fell out of his mouth and onto his plate.
"That's gross," I said, and Remus snorted
"Maybe you could fix that as well," he said, and I rolled my eyes. There was a screech and I looked up as Joseph, my owl, landed in front of me, and held his leg out.
"Thank you!" I said happily, tearing the letter from Alice, as I could tell by the handwriting, off of Josephs foot. Joseph nipped my finger lightly before soaring off.
"Who's it from?" Sirius asked excitedly
"Alice," I said simply, ripping open the envelope, and pulling the letter out, unfolding it.
I apologize in advance, love, because this letter's going to be short and sweet. Especially after those 9 pages you sent me. Honestly Lily. You and your bloody rants. They drive me insane. But, alas, I don't know what I'd do without them. So, from what I, Lily Evans translator extraordinaire, gathered from that rant was that Remus said you liked Potter and you flipped out? Am I right? And of course, Marlene kept interrupting you. Never liked her. Anyway. Yes. Lily, don't get mad or anything, but are you sure you don't like him? Yes, I can see here in your rant that you repeat that you don't infinite times, but still. Are you sure? Anyways! Just to keep you in the loop, I'm going out for dinner with Frank tonight, and I'm packing my toothbrush in my purse, if you know what I mean. I'm winking at you, by the way, incase you didn't get that.
I laughed and folded the letter, shoving it into my robes, "Do you have some parchment on you?" I asked, turning to Remus, who handed me a piece of parchment and a quill, "Thank you!"
Alice. First of all, good luck on your date. I hope you score. And about the James thing, well, I was wrong. I do. Like him, I mean. I really do. And yes, he's James now. And Black is Sirius. And Pettigrew is Peter. It's a long story, but I'll tell you later as I am currently eating dinner…with them. I WILL TELL YOU LATER!
I folded my letter and suddenly Joseph was in front of me, "You always know when I need to send a letter, don't you?" I mused, tying the letter to his foot, "Get this to her before she goes for her date, will you," I said, and Joseph nipped my finger again before soaring off.
"Alice has a date?" Sirius asked, and I ignored him, turning back to my mashed potatoes, a smile on my face.
Saturday, September 16th
9:00pm
We hadn't left the Great Hall yet. It's half an hour later, and we're still sitting in the Great Hall, chatting, when Joseph soars back in. I groan, and the other boys laugh as my owl drops the bright red howler in my lap.
"Bye!" I squeak, grabbing the smoking letter and sprinting out of the hall before it exploded, the boys laughter echoing after me.
Saturday, September 16th
10:30pm
"There was absolutely no need to send a Howler," I said sternly, as the quill continued to write, "I understand, it came as a shock, but really Alice, a Howler? What if it had exploded around everyone and everyone had found out that I fancy-"
"Hey!" I jumped and turned as my dormitory door opened, letting four boys walk in. I saw their eyes flicker from me, dressed in my pajamas with my hair tied up, to the enchanted quill.
"What were you doing?" Remus asked, watching as the quill started to move around
"No!" I squeaked, looking at the quill, "Don't write that down!" The quill stopped and scratched something out, before waiting patiently.
"Writing to Alice?" James smiled, and I nodded irritably, gesturing to the howler, which was lying open on my bed, quiet now that it had screamed at me.
"So, what did she have to yell at you about?" Remus winked, and I stuck my tongue out at him
"Better question, what are you lot doing here?" I asked, looking around at the four boys
"We were bored," Peter shrugged, and I rolled my eyes
"And before you ask, we figured out how to get up in girls dormitory's ages ago," Sirius said, seating himself down on my bed. I jumped at the letter and quickly put it away, much to their amusement, "So I can't read your letter?" Sirius asked, and I shook my head.
"Can I?" Remus asked, and I gave him an irritated look, "Is that a yes?"
"Whatever," I muttered, and he laughed happily, taking the letter from me.
"That's not fair!" James whined, and I chose to ignore him.
"Won't you get in trouble for being in here?" I asked, and the boys looked at each other, before shrugging. The door flew open to reveal Marlene Jensen, Mary MacDonald and Gwenog Jones, chattering away happily
"Hey Lily," Mary said, and they all looked up at me, before freezing, looking around at the four boys, "Oh, hi," Mary said quietly, flushing. I accidentally let out a snort, which I chose to cover up with a cough, causing the Marauders to grin.
"You feeling okay Lily?" Marlene asked, her eyes snapping away from James, who was busy trying to read the letter Remus was reading. Thank Merlin Remus wouldn't let him.
"M'fine," I said, and smiled at them, "Honestly!" I said, turning to the boys, who were wrestling on my bed, "Get off my bed!"
"Ah, Evans, you really want us to get off your bed?" Sirius said, wagging his eyebrows, and I rolled my eyes as my roommates began to titter annoyingly.
"Yes, I really do," I said. The door opened, revealing Professor McGonagall. I froze, as did everyone else in the dorm. She looked at my bed, and I swear steam shot out of her nose.
"Ms. Evans, kindly inform me as to why there are four boys in your dorm?" she asked me, and I blanched.
"Well, you see Professor," I squeaked, and then cleared my throat, "Potter came up here to ask me about a Heads meeting, and Remus came with him, you know, he's a prefect and all, and they were no doubt followed by the other two," I said, and McGonagall looked over at the boys, who were nodding along dumbly
"That does not explain what they are doing on the bed," she said, and I grabbed the end of my ponytail
"Well, I told them to have a seat," I said, "Because I'm too tired to go down the stairs, you know, so then Potter asked which one my bed was," I said, throwing him an apologetic glance, which he shrugged off. It was believable, "and then Black started joking around and went to sit on it, and then Potter went to shove him off, and then Remus went and then Pettigrew, and it all just kind of got out of hand," I finished. To my immense satisfaction, McGonagall nodded.
"I see, well, as you know, boys are not permitted in the girls dormitories," she said sternly, now speaking to the four boys, "So that's five points from Gryffindor," she said, and I saw all four boys groan, "Anywho," she said, and I bit my lip so I wouldn't burst into laughter, "I came to inform you, Mr. Lupin, that your aunt is sick in St. Mungos," she said gravely, and I saw Remus nod slowly, "You need to come with me," she said, and Remus nodded again. He gave the other three meaningful looks, before waving at me, completely ignoring Marlene, Mary and Gwenog, and walking out of the dormitory, "I expect you three," she said, nodding to James, Sirius and Peter, "to be out of this dormitory," she said, and shut the door behind her.
"She should really lower her expectations," Sirius mused, and I threw him an irritated look as my dorm mates, James and Peter burst into laughter.
"You should get out," I said, and my dorm mates threw me irritated looks, which I ignored.
"Yes, your majesty," Sirius said, getting gracefully off my bed and bowing down to me. James chuckled and slid off the bed, while Peter clumsily hopped off, "Bye!" Sirius said to the three girls, who giggled and waved at him. Peter followed behind Sirius and James grabbed my arm
"What?" I squeaked, my heart beating faster from the fright and from the fact that James was touching me.
"Well we did come to talk to you," he said, and waved at the other three, who burst into giggles as soon as the door closed
"Pathetic," I muttered, and James grinned as he led me down the stairs to the Common Room.
"Prongs!" Sirius hissed, "Why did you bring her? We have to go," he said meaningfully, winking, and James huffed
"Damn, I forgot," he said, and then turned apologetically to me, "Sorry about that," he grinned, and I felt my heart fail.
"Whatever," I laughed, and turned, but he grabbed my sleeve
"Mate, I'll be up in a second," he said to Sirius and Peter, still looking down at me.
"Fine, don't take too long," said Sirius, shoving Peter up the stairs to their dormitory.
"Mmm?" I said nervously, and James looked around.
"Er, not here," he said, and quickly led me out of the Common Room and into an empty classroom.
"What?" I said nervously, realizing that I was alone with James Potter whom I really fancied, in a dark and empty classroom. James turned to look at me slowly and I felt my stomach clench. Oh drat it, "Hi?" I squeaked, as he slowly made his way over to me. I backed up. Don't ask why, I just did. Reflex, I guess?
"Stop," he said quietly, and I did. He walked up to me and then looked at me for a few seconds, before stepping closer. So close, in fact, that my hands were resting on his chest. I tried to take a step back but he grabbed my hands, so I couldn't move.
"What?" I croaked, slightly scared. He shook his head and slowly bent his head down so it was closer to mine. He stopped. He was waiting for me to meet him half way
Did I want this? Did I really want to be with James Potter? I looked at him, looking at me, and I realized that, ever since he had talked to me about the Alice thing, I hadn't felt lonely. Not at all. I needed him. And, judging by the look in his eye, he wanted me. I didn't have to think about what I did next.
I pushed up on my tip-toes and kissed him.
Sunday, September 17th
12:30am
Oh Merlin. Oh Merlin, oh Merlin, oh Merlin! It's been two hours and I still can't sleep. I can't stop thinking about that kiss, and James. It's like he's running around in my mind or something because he's not getting out! Like someone put a permanent sticking charm on him and stuck him to my mind so I couldn't think of anything else. I haven't been able to sleep because I've been so busy thinking about him.
After we kissed, he pulled away and smiled down at me, and I felt my knees wobble. I hate this love thing, it's so mean to my body. I mean, my heart is starting to fail, my stomach is doing weird things, my knees are unstable. I'm pretty sure that's not healthy.
Anyway, so yes, he smiled down at me, and I just cannot get that image out of my head. Him smiling at me, I mean, because it wasn't like all his normal smiles! Which, admittedly, are very nice. This one was different. It was like he would only show me that smile, you know?
So after he smiles at me, he steps away and holds out his hand, which I took, and we walked back to the Common Room, talking happily. When we got to the Fat Lady, James turned to me and smiled, the same smile that is burnt in my memory, by the way. He told me to go inside, that he'd be along in a minute, and said goodnight, yes, he said goodnight, and then he hugged me and said the password, and the Fat Lady swung open, and then closed, leaving him outside. I had sprinted up to my dorm and danced around happily, much to the shock of my dorm mates, who are still angry at me, by the way, for kicking the boys out. And, of course, I wrote to Alice.
That was at 11:15. It is now 12:30, if my watch is correct, which it is, and I cannot sleep. I'm going insane. I want to sleep! I closed my eyes and turned around, so I was face down on my pillow, and took deep breaths, trying to fall asleep.
I opened my eyes again after a while, thinking it had to be at least 2 in the morning, but no. It was 12:35 am.
This is useless; I'm never going to fall asleep. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and got out, deciding to go to the library where I could get some peace and quiet. Who knows? I might be able to fall asleep in the library. I walked out of the empty Common Room, into the dark castle, and shivered slightly. Not because I'm afraid, I'm allowed to be out here, it just looks slightly creepy. And it's bloody freezing at night. I padded to the library in my night slippers and pulled my wand out.
"Alohamora," I whispered, and the lock clicked open. I pushed the door open and went to sit at the back, at my favorite table, right next to the window. I looked out the window at the full moon. I had always hated full moons, to be honest. They just seemed to perfect, as if something had to go wrong, since such perfection was not achievable. I got up onto the table, not wanting to sit on those bloody hard chairs, and lay down, on my back, looking up at the ceiling. You know that feeling when you realize that you've not been paying enough attention? Well, I'm feeling it now. I've never noticed how pretty the ceiling is. It's just so detailed! There are intricate carvings on it and the lights are so beautifully placed, and it kind of curves up like a dome. Wow.
Sunday, September 17th
2:00am
I started as a scream sounded across the grounds. What was that? Turns out I had fallen asleep, admiring the ceiling. I looked down at my watch; it was 2 in the morning. Bloody hell. At least I'd gotten some sleep. I felt oddly awake right now. The scream sounded again, and it sent a shiver down my spine, and caused some weird churning feeling in my stomach.
I hopped of the library table, fixed my Head Girl badge on my shirt, and took a deep breath before walking out of the library, wand drawn. The screams ahd come from outside, so I padded down the staircases, careful to avoid the trick steps
2:15am
I made it to the Great Hall and sprinted towards the doors when
BANG!
The doors flew open and I felt my heart sink. Sirius and Peter were stumbling in, supporting the body of. Oh no.
"What happened?" I screamed, running towards them. They seemed startled, at first, to see me, but got over it really quickly as their attention turned back to James.
"I don't know! I turned for a second to see where Peter had gotten to when he screamed!" Sirius said quickly, tears streaming down his face, "And when I turned around, Moony was gone and Prongs was on the floor, with this," he said, gesturing to the large gash across James's chest, which was extremely deep and was bleeding profusely.
I wiped my face, which was covered in tears, and ran over to James's legs, "Hurry, get him to the library," I said in a shaky voice. The other two nodded and we quickly made our way to the library, James dripping blood all over the floor.
"I'll clean it," Peter said, and Sirius nodded, and moved so he was holding James under the armpits and I was holding his legs, the two of us carrying James up the stairs while Peter ran back to the Great Hall, cleaning up the trail of blood.
2:25am
We carefully set James down on my favorite table and I fell into the chair, sobbing uncontrollably. James was still unconscious.
"Lily," Sirius begged, and I looked up at him, "come on, please, help," he said, and I nodded, getting up. I couldn't look at James, I couldn't. I had finally admitted to myself that I liked him, and we had finally gotten together, and now he was going to die on me.
"He's not going to die, is he?" I whispered, and Sirius bit his lip.
"I hope not," he said, and then turned to me, "I need you to look after him while I sprint over to the dungeons and get some potions, alright?" he said, and I nodded quickly, "Don't worry Lily, he will not die on us," he said, but his voice sounded thoroughly like a lie. He hugged me quickly, and I felt tears on my scalp, before he sprinted out of the library like a mad man, leaving me alone with the dying James Potter.
"You are not going to die," I said, moving over to stand by his head, "James, you will not die," I instructed again, sobbing, as I stroked his hair. He wouldn't respond, "Damn it James! Wake up!" I cried, but he didn't move. I felt my stomach hurt, as I continued to cry, and I grabbed his hand in both of mine, holding on to it for dear life. The doors burst open and I looked up to see Peter sprinting into the library, cleaning the floor in his wake.
"How is he?" he asked, stopping next to James. His eyes flickered to my hands, holding James's, but he chose not to say anything, for which I was grateful.
"H-he hasn't done anything," I said, and Peter groaned. He walked over to the gash, and ripped James's shirt away. I gasped. The gash went from his right shoulder all the way down to the middle of his chest, right where his heart was.
"Shit," Peter whimpered, and pulled out his wand.
"What are you doing?" I asked worriedly
"I'm cleaning it," he said, and I pulled my wand out, wanting to help, still holding James's hand in one of mine. Peter looked pointedly down at my hand and I sighed, as a few of my tears landed on James's shoulder, "Do you love him Lily?" he asked quietly, and I felt my body shake with a sob. Peter nodded slowly, "Now he really shouldn't die," he said, and I felt a shaky smile on my face.
"Will he be okay?" I asked, and Peter bit his lip.
2:30am
"Here!" the doors burst open and Sirius came sprinting in, covered in James's blood, his arms full of potions, "Hospital wing and the potions cupboard," he said, and we both nodded, as Sirius laid the potions down on the table, "Lily," he said, turning ot me, and I looked at him, "This is going to be intense," he said, "weve never seen a wound this bad," he said, gesturing to James's chest, "And we have to work quickly if we want to save him, alright?" he said, and I nodded, "How much is he bleeding?" Sirius asked, turning to Peter, who bit his lip
"He hasn't stopped! It keeps bloody flowing!" Peter said, and Sirius groaned
"He's loosing too much blood!" he said, and then looked towards the potions. I rushed towards them and looked through them, before handing him one. I was always good with potions
"This one will speed up the body's clotting process," I said, handing him a green bottle, "It'll reduce the blood flow," I said, and he nodded, grabbed the potion from me and poured a few drops on James's wounds, which started to bleed less, but were still bleeding.
"We need to heal his muscle," Sirius said, and I looked over at him, "The gash goes all the way down," he choked, and I wiped my face.
"That'll make everything bleed more," I said, looking down at the potion, and Sirius choked out a sob
"We'll have to take that chance," he said, and held his hand out for the bottle
2:32am
"Damn it!" Sirius yelled, conjuring up yet another towel, covering James's wounds. They were bleeding too much. There was a puddle of blood on the floor and a puddle surrounding him on the table. It wouldn't stop.
"He's turning white!" Peter squeaked, and I felt my stomach drop.
"Quick Peter, hand me that one," I said, nodding towards a yellow bottle, still holding pressure on the wound so it would stop bleeding. My dad was a surgeon, so I knew a little something about stopping bleeding. He'd always told me when I was a little girl that if something were bleeding, you were supposed to press it, and the bleeding would stop.
The bleeding wasn't stopping!
Peter handed me the yellow bottle, and I took one of my hands and grabbed the bottle, pouring a drop inside the wound. The blood stopped pouring out almost instantly, and I saw James's face turn pink again, and let out a sigh of relief, before falling into the chair, and sobbing.
"Lily, Lily come on," Sirius said gently, helping me to my feet, "Look," he said, placing both his hands on my shoulders, "I promise you, that that was not the last kiss you had with him, okay?" he said, and I nodded quickly, wiping my face, "And if you love him as much as he loves you, you better help me save him," Sirius said, and I chuckled, before moving to stand beside the bleeding James again.
2:35am
"Use this one," I said, passing a little red bottle to Sirius, who popped it open. He'd stopped asking me questions after I'd stopped the blood flow and was just doing what I told him now. He put a few drops of it on James's shoulder, where the wound began, and we watched as a sparkling drop traveled all the way down to the middle of his chest.
"What was it supposed to do?" Peter asked, taking the bottle that Sirius handed him and placing it down on the table.
"That," Sirius said, watching as the wound slowly began to close itself up, "We did it," he signed happily, and I felt my bottom lip quiver. Suddenly, there was an intake of breath and James's chest moved.
"James?" Peter said, and I hopped over to James's head, to see his eyes fluttering open.
"James!" Sirius said happily, relieved, and smiled at me. Sirius grabbed James's right hand, and I took his left, while Peter stood there by his head, smiling down at him.
"H-hi," James said in a raspy voice to Peter and Sirius, who grinned at him. He turned slowly to look at me, "L-Lils,"
"Yes, hi," I said, stroking his hand gently.
2:36am
He opened his mouth to say something more when he froze. I stopped stroking his hand to look at his wound, which was unsealing itself. I looked quickly up at James's face to see his eyes roll back in his head.
"No!" Sirius yelled, shaking James's shoulder, as the wound started to bleed profusely again, "Damn it!" he screamed, and grabbed a towel, pressing the wound again, as blood started to pour out.
I couldn't breathe. Heck, I couldn't move, as James started to die in front of me.
2:37am
"Hold this!"
"Evans!"
"Lily!"
I started and looked up quickly as I heard my first name being yelled, pulling my eyes away from the scene in front of me. What is that, you ask?
It's the body of James Potter. That's right. And there's blood. Everywhere. This is the story of how I got myself in this situation. I love James. And he's open on the table, bleeding.
"Lily!" I quickly snapped my hand out so Sirius could rest the bottle on it, and pull the stopper out. He dropped a few drops on James's wound and it stopped bleeding, but was still nastily open.
"We should get him to the Hospital Wing," I said, and Sirius shook his head quickly
"Cant," he whispered, "We'll get expelled," he said, and I frowned at him through my tears. He pulled out his wand and pointed it at the wound, which stopped bleeding, "Pete, give me the red one again," he whispered, and Peter handed him the bottle. Sirius added a few drops all over the wound, which instantly sealed up, leaving only a faint line where the gash had been.
"Do you think it's done now?" Peter asked, and Sirius nodded
"I don't think we used enough of this one," Sirius said, putting the bottle down. James took a breath again and the three of us let out a relieved breath, "He's okay," Sirius said, closing his eyes. I looked over at him, and noticed for the first time that Sirius Black was more than best mates with James Potter.
They were brothers.
"We have to go," Peter said, and Sirius sighed nodding.
"Go, I'll clean up," I said, and they looked at me.
"Thank you," Sirius said, pulling me into a hug. I hugged him back, letting my tears seep into his blood covered shoulder. He let me go and then looked down at me, "I'm trusting you to make sure he doesn't die while we're gone, alright?" he said, and I chuckled, before nodding. He smiled at me before turning to Peter, and with a nod, they both exited the library, leaving me with James.
Sunday, September 17th
3:30am
"Lily?"
I woke up with a start and looked around. I was in…the library? What? How did I get here? I'd been having this really weird dream. Believe me, it was strange.
"Lils," I looked up quickly and squeaked, falling backwards, as I saw James Potter lying on the table which I had been resting my head on. I stood up quickly, as he smirked at me, and looked down at him, the events of that night whooshing into my mind.
So I hadn't been dreaming them then.
"Oh Merlin!" I squeaked, looking down at his bare chest, where a faint, pink, puckered line was still visible, "How are you? Doesn't anything hurt? Do you feel internal bleeding or something?" I asked, and he raised an eyebrow at me.
"What would hurt?" he asked curiously, "And how can you possibly feel internal bleeding?"
"I don't bloody know," I muttered, "And what do you mean 'what would hurt?'" I asked, and he frowned at me
"Well, I was going to ask you why I was bare chested and lying on a table in the library," he said, winking at me, and I flushed, "but then you started to freak out. What would hurt?"
"You don't remember?" I asked, and he frowned at me, "Oh Merlin, look!" I said, pointing at his chest.
"Yes, I am aware that I have an excellently toned chest," he said, and I gave him a blank look, "I don't see what you're pointing- oh!" he said, noticing the line, "What the hell?"
"I don't know how to explain it," I said groggily, wiping my eyes, "But you're okay?" I asked, "No pain? No dizziness?" I asked, and he shook his head, "So you have no memory of what happened an hour ago?" I said, and he shook his head, "Lucky."
"What happened?" he asked, attempting to sit up, but I stood up quickly and shoved him back down.
"No moving," I instructed, and he chuckled. He looked at me curiously and I frowned at him, "What?"
"Did I snog you today?" he asked, and I flushed
"Technically it was yesterday," I mumbled, and he grinned widely
"I thought I imagined it," he said, throwing his arm over his eyes, "Any idea where my glasses are at?" he asked, "I can't see a thing"
"Er, no, actually," I said, looking around, "Sirius probably has them." At those words, James's eyes widened and he gasped.
"What happened?" he asked, looking at me, and I bit my lip, "Lily! Tell me!" Just then, the doors of the library flew open, revealing a still bloody Sirius Black.
"You're awake!" Sirius exclaimed happily, and ran at his best mate, "Thank you," he said to me, and I shrugged, "Oh of course, you didn't mind at all," he said, and I threw him a nasty look, to which he laughed
"What happened?" James asked desperately, and I cleared my throat
"I'll be going then. Have to shower, you know," I said, gesturing to my blood drenched pajamas. James looked at them and paled
"Is that my blood?" he squeaked, and Sirius nodded solemnly, "Is that my blood on you as well?" he asked, and Sirius nodded, "What the bloody hell happened?" he asked.
"Bye!" I said, and ran out of the library. James was alive. He was going to be fine. I grinned to myself as I walked up the stairs to my dormitory, changing into a different set of pajamas and crawling into my bed, falling asleep instantly.
Sunday, September 17th
11:00am
So, it's been 24 hours since Sirius Black first sat down at my library table and so much has changed since then. For starters, I am now James Potter's girlfriend, as was declared, loudly, in the Great Hall by Sirius Black. Secondly, I have four friends who understand me almost to the extent that Alice does. Thirdly, I am not lonely.
I'm making my way down the hallway to Gryffindor Tower right now, but the thing is, my mind isn't rambling. It's odd, sint it? I mean, yesterday, I was having long internal battles about random things, and now, I'm just strolling along. Mind pretty blank. Well not really, I'm thinking about my mind being blank, but it's a definite improvement.
"Hey!" I turned quickly to see James jogging to me. He stops in front of me and grins, before grabbing my hand nad pulling me into the same deserted classroom which we went into yesterday.
"Er, hi?" I said, and he grinned at me, before sitting me down at one of the desks.
"So, I understand you're very angry at me for almost dying yesterday," he said, and I rolled my eyes. Yes, I had given him a very long lecture, well, more like scream but those are just technicalities, about how he was never allowed to put me through that again, "And I think I know why that is," he said, and I gave him an irritated look
"Honestly, it doesn't take Dumbledore to figure that out," I said, and he laughed.
"I think it's because you love me," he said, and I grabbed the end of my ponytail, causing his eyes to twinkle. There was a giggle and I turned around quickly to see shadows underneath the door of the classroom.
"Are they still following you?" I asked, and James laughed, holding his hand out to me.
"I'll make it stop," he said, and I gave him a skeptical look. He sighed and grabbed my hand, pulling me off the desk, and in the direction of the door. He pushed it open and a hush fell over the girls, who pretended to be doing something really casual. James pulled me out behind him and I could actually feel them trying to murder me with their eyes, "Oh, Lily," he said, turning to me, causing me to crash into him, "I love you," he grinned.
There was a collective gasp from the fan girls and I let out a little giggle, "Yeah, well," I said awkwardly, and he laughed, before leaning down to kiss me.
"OH MY MERLIN!" I jumped and turned to see Alice standing there, grinning at me, and gasped
"Cant have you without someone to talk about me to," James said, and I looked at him.
"Thank you," I smiled, and he grinned, kissing my nose and pushing me towards Alice.
"YOU, my dear, have a lot of explaining to do," Alice said, grabbing my hand and dragging me right back into that empty classroom.
So, there you go! My first fanfic of the summer. I kind of got the idea after having an extensive Greys Anatomy marathon a few days back, incase you were wondering. Anyway, hope you liked it!
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