Here's a little Holiday one-shot I thought of. DW64's Twelve Days of Fanfiction Christmas inspired me to make this one-shot. Hope you enjoy it.
Twelve Days of Demon Christmas
A curtain is raised as DJ appeared. "Here you go everyone, a little song sung by some of my pals from the darkest part of this universe." He then whispers "Be warned that some of these could be…threatening."
He leaves as some singers came out, looking confused as they read the lyrics.
Singers: On the First day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…a man tied to a pear tree
Shows a random bystander tied and gagged to a pear tree, as DJ asks "Alright, who did that?"
"Sorry." Said a voice from the left, as DJ smacks is forehead.
He sighs and says, "Just…roll with it, please." The singers nod, a bit unsettled.
Singers: On the second day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…two squeaking bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
Shows two bats squeaking next to the man, who looked scared. The singers got away from the two bats as they settled on the branches of the tree.
Singers: On the third day of Christmas
A demon Gave to me…three Cthulhu Cults
Two squeaking bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
Shows three groups of men dressed in dark robes, speaking in a strange tongue. DJ slaps his forehead and says, "Who let them in, seriously?" His girlfriend, Kurumu, sighs as she sat down to listen to the song more.
Singers: On the forth day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…four screaming banshees
Three Cthulhu Cults
Two Squeaking bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
Suddenly four pale-ghosts appeared, screaming at the top their lungs, making the cults chant more, the bats squeak more and the man scream under his gag. DJ and the others covered their ears in pain at this.
The singers then sing louder to make sure they didn't lose their place.
Singers (Louder): On the fifth day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…FIVE RINGS OF DOOM!
Four screaming Banshees
Three Cthulhu Cults
Two Squeaking bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
"Oh no you don't!" DJ said, taking the five different rings and throws them into a portal, before they could cause destruction. He then says "Proceed," as he goes back stage. The singers shrug as they continued to sing.
Singers (Getting confused now): On the sixth day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…Six demons are drinking
FIVE RINGS OF DOOM!
Four Screaming Banshees
Three Cthulhu Cults
Two Squeaking Bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
Shows six imps walking around the tree and the cults, looking woozy. DJ sighs and asks, "Can we get these guys some water or something?"
"What are you talking about, junior?" asked one of the imps, still dazed. "We're alright." DJ just taps it, making it fall over.
"Just get going!" DJ said, as the Singers looked more confused.
Singers (Now officially confused): On the Seventh day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…Seven Sins are Swarming
Six Demons are drinking
FIVE RINGS OF DOOM!
Four screaming Banshees
Three Cthulhu Cults
Two Squeaking Bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
Suddenly the Homunculi from Fullmetal Alchemist, all glowiing with energy as they tried to attack, but Gambit and Sari was able to stop them. The Singers looked nervous at this.
Singers (Scared): On the Eighth day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…eight flirting Succubus
Seven Sins are Swarming
Six Demons are drinking
FIVE RINGS OF DOOM!
Four screaming Banshees
Three Cthulhu Cults
Two Squeaking Bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
Shows 7 Succubi wearing black and red bikinis, smirking as they waved. DJ looked confused and asks "Where's number 8?"
"Over here." Said Kurumu, wearing her swimsuit, making DJ blush deeply.
She walked over as DJ then whispers to himself 'calm down and enjoy the show…' as he turned to the show, as she giggled.
Singers (now more confused then scared): On the ninth day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…nine snakes are hissing
Eight flirting Succubi
Seven Sins are Swarming
Six Demons are drinking
FIVE RINGS OF DOOM!
Four screaming Banshees
Three Cthulhu Cults
Two Squeaking Bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
Shows nine king Cobras coming out, hissing a bit as they slithered through the stage. The Singers got away from the snakes as DJ sighs a bit, annoyed.
Singers (Scared again): On the Tenth day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…Ten Opera singing Golems
nine snakes are hissing
Eight flirting Succubi
Seven Sins are Swarming
Six Demons are drinking
FIVE RINGS OF DOOM!
Four screaming Banshees
Three Cthulhu Cults
Two Squeaking Bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
Suddenly 10 giant rock monsters came out of nowhere and began to sing in a opera tune, making everyone cringe.
Singers (Trying to go over the golems) On the Eleventh day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…Eleven dragons firing
Ten Opera singing Golems
nine snakes are hissing
Eight flirting Succubi
Seven Sins are Swarming
Six Demons are drinking
FIVE RINGS OF DOOM!
Four screaming Banshees
Three Cthulhu Cults
Two Squeaking Bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
Suddenly 11 Night Furies came out of nowhere, roaring as they sent out fireballs all over the place. DJ then asks, "Who let in the Night furies? Seriously?"
"Sorry about that." Ronny said sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head. "I found a box full of dragons in the back and I felt bad for them, so…I let them out."
DJ sighs and says, "Just roll with it you guys. They won't eat you." The singers nod, scared now. But they decided to at least get to the last part of the song.
Singers: On the Twelfth Day of Christmas
A demon gave to me…12 caged Psychopaths
Eleven dragons firing
Ten Opera singing Golems
nine snakes are hissing
Eight flirting Succubi
Seven Sins are Swarming
Six Demons are drinking
FIVE RINGS OF DOOM!
Four screaming Banshees
Three Cthulhu Cults
Two Squeaking Bats
And a man tied to a pear tree
Suddenly a cage full of the most dangerous crazies came out from the top of the stage, all wearing holiday-version of their outfits; Hannibal Lector, Jason, Freddy Krueger, Chuckie the doll, Deadpool, who looked confused, and many others.
"This isn't funny," said Deadpool plainly, as he got out of the cage, "Why was I locked up with all those Halloween psychos?"
"Don't ask." DJ said plainly. He goes to the stage as the Singers ran off; screaming after Jason got his machete out of the cage. "Sorry about all the craziness folks, but I hope you enjoyed the show. Have a merry Christmas and a happy new year."
After everyone left, Kurumu then says "Can we have some help cleaning off the stage?"
Deadpool nods and says, "I'll help." He gets out a broom and began to sing a random Christmas song.
DJ sighs and asks Kurumu "Think this beats out last year's craziness?"
"Almost." Kurumu said with a shrug.
"What happened last year?" asked Deadpool, as DJ used his powers to get the Night Furies out.
"A few of my enemies tried to kidnap Santa Claus when my team had a Christmas party. Why?"
Deadpool looked at DJ like he was insane. "Okay…" he whispers "Nut job." DJ sighs, knowing it was weird when someone like Deadpool calling you a 'Nut job'.
"Lets just hope that next year won't be as insane." Kurumu said, as DJ nods.
"Knowing where I'm from, it would be more then likely." DJ said plainly as he and his girlfriend helped Deadpool clean up, getting the guy off the tree. "Sorry about that."
"AHH!" screamed the man, running away from the theater.
"What was his problem?" asked Deadpool, confused. DJ and Kurumu looked at him weirdly at this. "What?" asked the Merc with the Mouth, confused.
End of One-Shot
Hoped you enjoyed this one-shot everyone. Please Read, Review and Suggest away!