Clean up on Isle 666
By Tani 'Lefty' Wataridori
"Hello, hello? I-is anyone there? H-h-hey, I've got a real problem on my hands here. I seriously nee-...need you guys... oh my god....look my address is 145th Brookl-AAAAAAAAAAUGHHH!!! NO NO NO NOT THE FACE! HOLY SHI-"
" Beep...beep...beep..."
It was a bright Saturday morning in New York, and what good of a time to go out and do nothing but lounge about the house and get drunk. The men in grey had taken the day off of their ghost chasing schedule due to the great ghost drought in the city that month, leaving the firehouse unattended for the week. Yes sir, a trouble-free day in the Big Apple. Yep. Nothing gets better than this.
" Ugh...anything's better than this..."
Okay, so I forgot that it was late July during a heat wave. With the Ecto-1 in the shop thanks to Ray's drunken mailbox rampage the day before, the Ghostbusters had to rely on the kiddie pool in Winston's back yard since there were no other means of transportation to the beach. Dr. Venkman sat in the pool, squished between Egon and Winston. The water was completely lukewarm, and being stuck between two sweaty Yankees wasn't helping him. " Hey Ray!" Peter called out, flicking a rubber duck that was afloat in the pool, " Hows about getting us a beer from the cooler, you bum". Ray looked up from his 17 th can and nodded wearily. Stumbling to the cooler, he lifted the top and fished around the ice with his hand for another beer. After much searching (hey its tough being drunk) he found one. One. One beer was left in the entire cooler. They looked at Ray in silence.
Ray: " ......."
Egon, Peter, Winston: " ......."
'Chug chug chug!'
" NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
Ray had drank the last beer. After the three's 5 minute long interlude, they lept out of the pool to tackle Ray. Unfortunately, they only flipped the pool over in all their efforts. After they struggled to get out of the pool to beat the crap out of Ray, a familiar voice entered his ears.
" Mommy, Daddy's drunk again isn't he?"
Peter looked towards the voice to see his 3 year old son Oscar pointing at him, standing next to a narrow eyed Dana. Venkman bit his lip. " Dear..." started Dana, " What in god's name are you doing out here in a kiddie pool wearing nothing but your briefs? Aren't you supposed to be at the firehouse?". Peter gave his wife the flattest expression he could, " Oh come on honey, there hasn't been any calls in weeks. Plus its too freaking hot to do any chases today whatsoever". Dana nodded. " Okay I can take that, but what about the underwear? You know I left you a pair of trunks yesterday in the office"." They usually fall off when I dive" he said. " But honey this is a kiddie pool". "Oh."
"Anyways" Dana continued, " I stopped over here to tell you that I need you go fetch me some things from the grocer. Peter pulled his briefs up a bit. " Fetch?" he replied, raising a brow, " What am I anyways, a dog? Besides, why can't you do it?". Dana gave Peter a glance so cold that his whitie-tighties nearly froze up. " Okay okay, I'll get to it right away" Peter gave in. " Thanks dear!" replied Dana with a smile, taking young Oscar by the hand, " Here's the grocery list. See you later!".
As soon as she had walked off, the ghostbusters gave a sigh of relief. Winston almost wet his pants. Egon did wet his pants. Ray was roasting a marshmallow.
" what?"
So the four got dressed and headed towards the bus-stop to go to the grocer. Peter in a t-shirt, Winston in his basketball duds, Egon with a clip-on tie and Ray with his I Love Mr .Stay-Puft shirt. After about 10 minutes they had arrived at the local grocer, parking-lot filled to the brim with cars and people rushing in and out of their vehicles.
" Um, maybe we should come back another time" said Ray hopefully. " I'm with Ray on this one" agreed Winston, " It's so crowded that it makes that kiddie pool look like freaking Canada in comparison". Venkman flattened out his eyes and gave them the most pathetic look he could give. " Oh come on guys!" he whined, " You know what Dana's gonna do to me if I come home empty-handed". Ray grinned and raised a brow. " No Ray, not that. I mean BAD things" Peter corrected. " Ah".
Without any more whining from Peter, they walked into the store, dodging several speeding kids and a grandma with a cart. Ray looked to the left and found a bag of marshmallows in a lady's cart and without any hesitation, started stuffing as many as he could in his mouth.
Digging into his pocket, Venkman pulled out the list and began to read it out-loud. " A head of cabbage, a box of fruit loops, four cans of tuna, a pound of swiss, hey this'll be easy" he said with a grin.. He looked up from the list and his grin began to fade seeing the seas of Yankees rushing from one side of the room to the other. " Oh boy" he said to himself, shaking his head.
" Ok men, huddle!". The men in gray grouped in a foot-ball circle and listened as Peter dished out his plans. " Ok, to get through this we gotta split up alright?". " Right!" chorused the others.
" Ok then, Winston: You get a head of cabbage from the produce isle...". " Got it chief" said Winston with a nod.
" Egon: You get the tuna from the canned foods isle". " Affirmative" Egon replied.
" And Ray: You get the swiss cheese". " Mmuhmehmuh" said Ray, marshmallow dripping from his mouth.
" Couldn't have said it better, Ray. Okay and I'll get the cereal."
*BUMP!*
Ray: Oh excuse me ma'am.
".....ohshit-"
A high-pitched girly shriek rung in Venkman's ears which could only mean that Ray got his hand stuck in a blender again, so he spun around to find him. Fortunately, Ray found him, running and flapping his arms about like a chicken with it's head chopped off, jumping into his arms.
" ITSABIGSCEPTRTHINGANDITWASINTHESTOREANDIWANTMYMOMMYYY!!!!!!!!"
spattered Ray. Venkman dropped Ray on the floor and sighed. " Okay Scooby-Doo, calm down and speak like a normal human being". Ray panted as if he was giving birth for ten seconds and then finally explained what was on his mind.
" YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!" *Faint*
" sweet goddamn, this is going to be harder than I thought..." groaned Venkman.
TO BE CONTINUED!
By Tani 'Lefty' Wataridori
"Hello, hello? I-is anyone there? H-h-hey, I've got a real problem on my hands here. I seriously nee-...need you guys... oh my god....look my address is 145th Brookl-AAAAAAAAAAUGHHH!!! NO NO NO NOT THE FACE! HOLY SHI-"
" Beep...beep...beep..."
It was a bright Saturday morning in New York, and what good of a time to go out and do nothing but lounge about the house and get drunk. The men in grey had taken the day off of their ghost chasing schedule due to the great ghost drought in the city that month, leaving the firehouse unattended for the week. Yes sir, a trouble-free day in the Big Apple. Yep. Nothing gets better than this.
" Ugh...anything's better than this..."
Okay, so I forgot that it was late July during a heat wave. With the Ecto-1 in the shop thanks to Ray's drunken mailbox rampage the day before, the Ghostbusters had to rely on the kiddie pool in Winston's back yard since there were no other means of transportation to the beach. Dr. Venkman sat in the pool, squished between Egon and Winston. The water was completely lukewarm, and being stuck between two sweaty Yankees wasn't helping him. " Hey Ray!" Peter called out, flicking a rubber duck that was afloat in the pool, " Hows about getting us a beer from the cooler, you bum". Ray looked up from his 17 th can and nodded wearily. Stumbling to the cooler, he lifted the top and fished around the ice with his hand for another beer. After much searching (hey its tough being drunk) he found one. One. One beer was left in the entire cooler. They looked at Ray in silence.
Ray: " ......."
Egon, Peter, Winston: " ......."
'Chug chug chug!'
" NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
Ray had drank the last beer. After the three's 5 minute long interlude, they lept out of the pool to tackle Ray. Unfortunately, they only flipped the pool over in all their efforts. After they struggled to get out of the pool to beat the crap out of Ray, a familiar voice entered his ears.
" Mommy, Daddy's drunk again isn't he?"
Peter looked towards the voice to see his 3 year old son Oscar pointing at him, standing next to a narrow eyed Dana. Venkman bit his lip. " Dear..." started Dana, " What in god's name are you doing out here in a kiddie pool wearing nothing but your briefs? Aren't you supposed to be at the firehouse?". Peter gave his wife the flattest expression he could, " Oh come on honey, there hasn't been any calls in weeks. Plus its too freaking hot to do any chases today whatsoever". Dana nodded. " Okay I can take that, but what about the underwear? You know I left you a pair of trunks yesterday in the office"." They usually fall off when I dive" he said. " But honey this is a kiddie pool". "Oh."
"Anyways" Dana continued, " I stopped over here to tell you that I need you go fetch me some things from the grocer. Peter pulled his briefs up a bit. " Fetch?" he replied, raising a brow, " What am I anyways, a dog? Besides, why can't you do it?". Dana gave Peter a glance so cold that his whitie-tighties nearly froze up. " Okay okay, I'll get to it right away" Peter gave in. " Thanks dear!" replied Dana with a smile, taking young Oscar by the hand, " Here's the grocery list. See you later!".
As soon as she had walked off, the ghostbusters gave a sigh of relief. Winston almost wet his pants. Egon did wet his pants. Ray was roasting a marshmallow.
" what?"
So the four got dressed and headed towards the bus-stop to go to the grocer. Peter in a t-shirt, Winston in his basketball duds, Egon with a clip-on tie and Ray with his I Love Mr .Stay-Puft shirt. After about 10 minutes they had arrived at the local grocer, parking-lot filled to the brim with cars and people rushing in and out of their vehicles.
" Um, maybe we should come back another time" said Ray hopefully. " I'm with Ray on this one" agreed Winston, " It's so crowded that it makes that kiddie pool look like freaking Canada in comparison". Venkman flattened out his eyes and gave them the most pathetic look he could give. " Oh come on guys!" he whined, " You know what Dana's gonna do to me if I come home empty-handed". Ray grinned and raised a brow. " No Ray, not that. I mean BAD things" Peter corrected. " Ah".
Without any more whining from Peter, they walked into the store, dodging several speeding kids and a grandma with a cart. Ray looked to the left and found a bag of marshmallows in a lady's cart and without any hesitation, started stuffing as many as he could in his mouth.
Digging into his pocket, Venkman pulled out the list and began to read it out-loud. " A head of cabbage, a box of fruit loops, four cans of tuna, a pound of swiss, hey this'll be easy" he said with a grin.. He looked up from the list and his grin began to fade seeing the seas of Yankees rushing from one side of the room to the other. " Oh boy" he said to himself, shaking his head.
" Ok men, huddle!". The men in gray grouped in a foot-ball circle and listened as Peter dished out his plans. " Ok, to get through this we gotta split up alright?". " Right!" chorused the others.
" Ok then, Winston: You get a head of cabbage from the produce isle...". " Got it chief" said Winston with a nod.
" Egon: You get the tuna from the canned foods isle". " Affirmative" Egon replied.
" And Ray: You get the swiss cheese". " Mmuhmehmuh" said Ray, marshmallow dripping from his mouth.
" Couldn't have said it better, Ray. Okay and I'll get the cereal."
*BUMP!*
Ray: Oh excuse me ma'am.
".....ohshit-"
A high-pitched girly shriek rung in Venkman's ears which could only mean that Ray got his hand stuck in a blender again, so he spun around to find him. Fortunately, Ray found him, running and flapping his arms about like a chicken with it's head chopped off, jumping into his arms.
" ITSABIGSCEPTRTHINGANDITWASINTHESTOREANDIWANTMYMOMMYYY!!!!!!!!"
spattered Ray. Venkman dropped Ray on the floor and sighed. " Okay Scooby-Doo, calm down and speak like a normal human being". Ray panted as if he was giving birth for ten seconds and then finally explained what was on his mind.
" YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!" *Faint*
" sweet goddamn, this is going to be harder than I thought..." groaned Venkman.
TO BE CONTINUED!