I know it is not good but please bear with me I need to find someone who can help me with the story I have some good ideas but they need emprouvement…
They were never the same after that night …..
"come here "john bellowed after getting Sam back to sleep , Dean didn't hesitate at all he went straight to his dad he has disobeyed him once that night and he wasn't planning on doing it again especially when his father is that angry
"y..yes sir " he said in a shaking voice eyes fixed on the ground, in one steady movement John backhanded his son harshly on the face which send him kissing the ground
"look at me when I am talking to you !"Dean looked at him with betrayal looks he never thought his dad would ever hit him that way but he knew he had made a terrible mistake and there is consequences to pay he got up on his feats as quickly as he got knocked down and this time he looked the man in his eyes but he couldn't stop the shaking in his hands john was more furious on himself than on Dean he was the one who couldn't protect his family knowing there Is danger lurking in the dark waiting an opportunity to manifest but now the only thing he can do to stop that from happening again is
"I want you to pack up everything we're heading to pastor Jim's" Dean couldn't do anything but to nod his head and luckily John didn't ask more, the next day they were in the impala with Sam leaning on his brother oblivion to the fact that he almost got killed the night before Dean was more than happy to watch him and John could see the change in his oldest son's behavior he was more watchful and tensed paying attention to every sound every movement and that was good he would be able to protect Sammy better he would become the soldier he needed to survive in this world. He was still angry but a look on his kids took that edge away and replaced it with sorrow and grief he has to do something.
They arrived at the old church and Jim was standing on the doorway he sensed that something was wrong so wrong from the tone John talked him with but he'll get all the details soon
"come in hurry it might rain anytime!" he yelled at the Winchesters once he saw that black Chevy impala, he noticed the sensitivity of the situation the moment his eyes caught Dean who had the shoulders slumped like he committed murder or worse and John who was holding Sam in his arms not too confident on letting the kid march on his own and with his older brother
" I made lunch thought you'd all be hungry from the trip" john forced a side smile forming on his face and he tried to reply calmly
"thank you Jim" then they were all on the table eating peacefully no one said a word Dean was hanging his head barely eating anything and that was weird John was eyeing the kid with flames in his eyes ready to bust in any second and Sam well was Sam the pouting kid. After lunch the two men who sat and drank coffee while the kids were unpacking Jim saw the opportunity to know what happened
"so John aren't you going to tell me why you're so mad at the kid what has he done ?"John at first was stunned how the old man knew what happened but he replied nonetheless
"he disobeyed my orders thus putting Sam's life at danger I don't know what the hell the kid was thinking !" he wanted to teach the boy a listen right there but a reassuring hand from the pastor stopped him
"John he's a kid he's barely 9 years old you can't expect him to act like a grown up" John seemed to think about that for a moment but remembering the form of the monster over his baby boy brought all the emotions back
"Sam could have died if it wasn't for …." He stopped as a thought popped in his head the kid wasn't able to defend neither himself or his brother because of his shooting skills because he was too week and scared of fighting the monster and again it was his fault for not teaching Dean more than two or three sessions with the gun but he is going to fix that Jim must have seen him locked in his head so he asked
"what are you thinking John" the old man replied shrugging
"Dean wasn't able to shoot the Shatriga because I didn't train him to but now I know what to do" Jim knew that this was the only way John can handle the situation in and make it sound reasonable and in control on his family so he didn't argue.
John spent all night long thinking of ways to train his oldest to make him stronger faster and even braver the kid used to do minor exercises but now he has to step it up he woke him up at 4 .30 pm
"you have twenty minutes take a shower eat and dress up we're going for a run" Dean who was shivering under his father's eyes obeyed getting out of the bed as quickly as he managed and he made it to the kitchen early fixing himself a sandwich then heading outside in a clearing zone where he found his father
"from now on your real training starts" he stopped waiting for his words to sink then he continued
"I want five miles you can start" and with that John went back inside the house Dean wasn't that choked he's done some running before it couldn't be that hard and if his father wanted him to do something he will never disobey not again he doesn't want to see the disappointed looks in the man's eyes his heart can't take more ,he begun the run not caring how much his feats hurt or how much they are swelling , his body was screaming at him he no longer felt his legs ,his breaths were shaky and his limbs begin to feel like lead. He had to stop for a while or he's going to die it's been hours and still he hasn't nearly finished 3.5 miles his dad was going to kill him .
"about faking time! " John yelled at his son kneeling in front of him the kid has collapsed in a huddle of wheezy intakes of breaths and he wished he looked stronger but as the fire wormed up in his stomach and burning pain was building up in his jaw and ears he didn't care, John looked at the sight and he didn't feel sorry he had to do this or his family will be at risk and he depends on Dean to keep his youngest safe. He didn't have another choice.
"Get off the ground son" he scolds his son who's laying unresponsive on the ground when he didn't get a response he held the kid in his arms and made him stand in attention then he said in a dangerous tone and glaring eyes
"if I ever have to do that again there will be serious consequences got me " Dean mumbled with scared eyes and shaky hands with his head forced to look up
"y..yes" though John wasn't satisfied so he growled putting force under his touch on Dean's arms and the kid got the message
"yes sir "he said in a louder voice then after his father let go of his shoulders he adjusted his posture in a soldier one that his father for sure liked and wanted at the moment but John wasn't done yet he offered a bottle of water and then quickly gave his other order
"now 50 push-ups and sit ups "Dean didn't waste any time although he was extremely tired he knew that his father was training him so he would be able to take care of his brother better he was too week to shoot the monster and if it wasn't for his father Sam would be dead now and they would be in his funeral he would never forgive himself if something like that happened he didn't save the kid that night to let him die now he would do his best from now he promised himself .
There was a lot of other trainings to do and it took him all his power and even more to survive that day he didn't go to sleep until one o clock, and the following days were even harder he didn't see Sam a lot and he knew that pastor Jim would take care of his brother but he was still worried maybe Sam will be safer with other people maybe he would get his brother killed because of his irresponsibility .he spent nights just thinking of that and then doing his father work outs two weeks he was suffering in silence and not showing anything he rarely talked unless he was addressed and he tried not to engage with his brother which was the hardest thing ever his father only got harder and harder on him he heard the pastor talking to his father about him but he never understand what they were talking about so he ignored the voices and continued his nightly trainings which consisted on more sit ups push-ups cleaning the guns knives, weapons luckily he had his own room now where no one could see him. See him cleaning his wounds in silence fixing his injuries and crying him to sleep.
They left pastor Jim's place the third week and headed for bobby's John planned on training him better there since bobby had bigger place but Sam stayed at pastor Jim's things only got worse all his trainings were doubled and his father never accepted any excuses even when he was giving it his best it wasn't enough the old man always demanded perfection anything beneath it was considered failure and had punishment bobby didn't agree on that but it seemed that he couldn't argue his father or they will be leaving in an instant.
Dean was constantly missing Sammy but he didn't trust himself with the kid he still needed reassuring from his father and one day he had training with guns but uncle bobby said that they better play football as a change John was in a hunt and he didn't like what happened, Dean was able to hear them talking on the phone and he felt guilty for disobeying his father but he didn't exactly had a choice.
Life continued like that more training more responsibilities John was finally able to trust Dean with his Sam but Dean never left Sam's site like never ever he was constantly by his side at all times he became overprotective than he was before it didn't matter if it was in school I the motel room alone in other hunters house and people noticed that some of them just kept starring while he was taking care of his brother either defending him or talking him to class making sure no one is bugging him or if they stated their opinions he just ignored them and focused on his baby brother.
Every time Sam wasn't in sight he'd go crazy hysterical he'd go on and on, on the kid as why he didn't show up at time as why he wasn't at the place agreed to, he'd look at Sammy like the kid hurt him deep down and he won't be himself for the rest of the day keeping a strict eye on his little brother who of course would feel so guilty that he'll never do it again they were together at all times which eventually drove one of them crazy. Obsession was running in the family in all his forms, and guilt was the play card on their feelings it was always like that nothing gets forgotten and mistakes hunt you even after times get by.
Now the brothers were again reunited Dean had to deal with his father's ways of discipline an detaching lessons always the practical ways he was sitting and telling Sam how this hunt is his business only how his father send him for that reason to correct his faults to show how people die because of simple actions because of defiance and disobedience to send him a message as to never do that again to remain the faithful soldier he is .He has to tell Sam how one night he was close at causing his death and why he never went against their dad why he listens to the man and do what he says without questioning why he's always following his orders .
Sam never thought about things like that he knew his family was messed up in the head, they would all be good patience in a psycho hospitals but they had each other and that was it they needed to survive everything and stay together because they're each other weakness and also strong link they'd always overcome their differences because they can't stay apart for too long .