Disclaimer: Don't own Kingdom Hearts or Disney, or anything associated with it. Anyways, enjoy~

'Xion'=thoughts

Xion=narration

A/N: For the purpose of the story, Roxas, Xion and Namine are 18-19. I understand how uncomfortable it can be to read explicit content involving teenagers, I am 18 myself so I'm pretty cognizant of how often teenagers get sexualized and I'm not interested in piling onto that.

Forget Me Not

Diary entry: 07-13

The Organization forced us to keep one of these to track our progress. I guess I can't break old habits so I thought I'd start one again on my own terms. I'm a little late, but it's the thought that counts, right ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

—

I used to always ask myself "who am I?"

But now I know exactly who I am. I'm Xion, and my best friends are Roxas and Axel (although he goes by Lea now, he still wants us to call him Axel) and we were given a second chance at life thanks to Sora. Of course, the three of us decided to live in Twilight Town.

Things are pretty different now! We live in an apartment near the outskirts of town, Roxas still insists on hunting down heartless, so me and Axel work to pay for rent. Axel's job changes up pretty much every month, but I found a nice job at the bistro nearby. It gets pretty hectic there so after work I always take a train to the beach where I'm in my own little world…

Xion shifted her hand through the warm golden sands, trying to uncover any pearly white shells she might have missed the other day. "Ah, this one's pretty nice...even though I already have ten more just like it." 'I hope Roxas and Axel aren't getting annoyed by all the seashells I bring home. It's starting to clutter up what little space we have, then again, we'd have more space if they put their stuff up once in a while.'

She fell onto the sand and let the melodic sound of the waves crashing into each other put her at ease. 'Even though the sun never sets, it's only me here at these hours. I think that's the best part.' The perpetual sunset always positioned just barely above the horizon gave Twilight Town its namesake.

Of all the worlds she'd been too, she'd always felt home here, maybe hours seemed to go by in minutes, or days melded together. Maybe she went through her ups and down, but the sunset never changed, it was the one thing she could always count on and her go to excuse as to why she was late at work during rush hour.

'As long as everything stays like this, guess I can't complain much.'

Xion would've stayed there on the beach, soaking up the sun, if not for the blood-curdling scream she heard down the shore

"Aaaahhh!"

She rose to her feet, her keyblade forming in her hand. 'I'm a bit out of practice, but it shouldn't be much problem.'

Running down the shoreline as fast as she could, Xion found a girl in a white sundress and woven sun hat surrounded by a swarm of heartless. 'Good, they're just lower class heartless, this'll be quick!' She raised her keyblade for a quick slash that would wipe them all out at once, but made the mistake of locking onto the eyes of the girl she was saving. "W-Wait! I know you, Nami—"

While Xion was briefly distracted, the heartless took it as an opportunity to lunge at her face and she toppled backward.

"Oh my gosh! Xion!" Naminé cried.

"N-No! I'm fine!" Prying the ravaging heartless off her face, she ended the fight in an instant with a thundara spell. 'That was kind of bad, I should've used magic to begin with.'

"Xion, are you okay? Your face is all scratched up."

"It's nothing!" She tried to laugh off the gut-wrenching humiliation she felt. "Ha ha, I should be the one telling you that, right Naminé! So what brings you here to Twilight Town?"

"For old time's sake you could say. Riku and Kairi are off looking for Sora so I thought I'd do something productive and Twilight Town seemed like the best place."

"Something productive?" 'Is she being this vague on purpose.'

"Uh...well, it's embarrassing you know..." She twirled a finger around her pale blonde hair. "Being the only one without a keyblade, but I guess it can't be helped."

"Don't be so down, you can draw really well...I'm pretty bad it."

"That's the other reason why I came. Hiding in that old mansion, drawing for days on end, running for my life and being held captive, it brings back memories. I'd love to go back there if it wasn't swarming with heartless, since you're skilled with the keyblade I'm glad we bumped into each other!"

'I don't like where this is heading.'

"If you can clear out the heartless from the old mansion, then I'll draw you a picture!" Naminé grabbed onto Xion's hands. "So what do you say? You can put that keyblade to use!"

'Of course! I'd love to!' Was what Xion wanted to say, but it came out more like some incomprehensible mumble with how flustered she was when Naminé held her hands. Worst of all, she had no idea why, the whole 'emotions' thing was still new to her and her friends weren't much help in that department.

Luckily, Naminé picked up on Xion's discomfort and shyly put her hands behind her back. "Sorry...I got ahead of myself. Come on, let's get going, I know a shortcut to the mansion~"

Xion followed behind the mysterious girl, her thoughts swarming around in her head like a whirlpool. 'Is she different somehow? It's only been a few months since we were all together at Destiny Islands, she couldn't have changed that much. Maybe I'm just going crazy! So then why am I feeling like this?!'

"You're pretty quiet," Naminé said.

"I-It's not you, my mind's on other things. Hey, have you noticed Twilight Town's gotten a lot bigger? There's so many people now!"

"Oh I know. I find myself getting lost sometimes which is the best feeling."

Even though Xion had already seen everything in Twilight Town, there was something of a novelty being able to sightsee with Naminé and experience the town over again with her. After squeezing past a narrow alleyway, the girls stood in front of the old mansion, bypassing the forest that surrounded it.

"Pretty great, huh," Naminé said, marveling at the decayed manor. She turned to Xion, a smile permeating her face. "Well, you ready?"

"Ah, I don't know..."

"Don't be scared, Xion! We'll be together, just you and me, okay? I won't leave your side."

"Since you put it like that," Xion swung her keyblade out. "Okay! I'm ready now!"

When they opened the door, it emitted a sharp, eerie wail that ruined any element of surprise. Before they were even able to enter the mansion, a heartless jumped out in front of Xion which she quickly swatted away. "Ha, I'm starting to get used to this again!"

Without further hesitation, they ventured forward. "It's just like I remembered it!" Naminé exclaimed.

"Yeah me too, it's been a while though. It's still run down and haunted."

"Lighten up, Xion. It's not that bad."

*CRASH

"Okay, I take that back, but I think it adds to the atmosphere," She said, referring to the ever-present darkness coursing through its foundation and manifesting itself within its interior.

"I'll give you that, but we still need to watch our- Eeeeeek!" Xion furiously swatted off the cobwebs sticking to her work uniform while Naminé giggled to herself.

"Let me guess, you don't like spiders?"

"And you do?!"

"I've grown to them from being stuck here between both versions of Twilight Town," She took a moment to pluck the small spider crawling on Xion's shoulder, then marveled at the creature in her palm. "They're not so bad, even a little cute."

"Are you okay, Naminé?!"

"Of course, what would make you say otherwise?"

"Uh...nevermind."

They made their way up the staircase that, of course, had to moan with each step like they were in some cheesy horror flick. The heartless greeted them on the second floor and Xion wasted no time in striking them down with her keyblade.

Somehow everything came so naturally when Xion felt the handle of her oversized key weighing down on her, the rush of battle and excitement energized her from shadow to shadow. 'I remember why Roxas likes this so much!' With the last heartless reduced to a heart, Xion turned back to Naminé, a smile across her face.

"Aw, you're so cute when you smile!"

"You really think so..." Xion's face turned a dark shade of red. However, while she was absorbed by Naminé's comment, she didn't realize there were more heartless creeping up behind her before it was too late and she slammed down on the floor. 'Why does this keep happening to me?!'

After tossing around on the floor, she broke free of its hold and pinned the little monster down with her foot where she impaled the heartless through its chest. Tapping the excess residue off her keyblade once the job was done, her smile faded away from fatigue. "Where's this special room before we get attacked again?"

"Just down the hall, come on!"

The two walked into a blank white room with a single long table and two chairs at the end. It was a jarring, yet welcome contrast to the soft browns and oranges Xion was so used to seeing. It reminded her of her days being stuck in the Organization's castle where there was no short supply of the color white in practically every inch of the place.

That made the most noticeable aspect of the white room ironically be the splashes of color lining the wall and littering the floor, drawings Xion vaguely recognized. One particular drawing of Roxas and Axel in their black attire from the bygone days caught her eye. "You drew all of this?" She asked.

"Yep, every single one. They're memories of the past, Sora's past anyway. I can't believe they're still intact."

"I'm sure no one's been in here for a long time."

"Well, I am the white room," Naminé said with conviction.

"What do you mean?"

"Everything about this place...is me. If I'm gone, it could never be the same," She ran her hand along the smooth surface of the table, picking up her cherished sketchbook along the way. "Sorry, I was just thinking out loud. So, shall we get started?"

"Get started?"

"On your drawing, silly, I promised you one if you helped me." Naminé pulled up a chair from the opposite end of the table where Xion took her seat.

"You won't get nervous if I look?" Xion asked.

"No way, you'll be my first human subject in a while." When Naminé's pencil glided across the thick sheet of paper, a wide smile stretched across her face. Stroke by stroke, Xion's form came into shape; her silky black hair she kept short, her round face, the brightness of her eyes, even the tiny imperfections that molded her.

Meanwhile, Xion watched Naminé diligently work on her craft, meticulously capturing all of Xion's details. 'Nothing about Naminé has changed that much since we last met, maybe I'm the one who's seeing her differently.'

"...you do make me feel a little nervous when you stare at me like that." Naminé murmured.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to stare!"

'I didn't mean to say that out loud!' Naminé tipped her sunhat down to hide how red in the face she was getting. 'Leave it to me to make my client feel uncomfortable.'

An unbearably long, awkward silence later and Naminé put the finishing touches on her drawing, then promptly showed it off to Xion. "Soooo how do you like it? It doesn't usually take me this long, but I had to get the details just right."

"Ahhh! Oh my gosh it's so good! This looks better than I do in real life!"

"Ha, ha, I think it's pretty accurate." She handed the drawing to Xion. "Don't forget about me, okay?"

"You're not staying in this old mansion, are you? I thought maybe we could do something afterward."

"I will for a little while longer, I'm sure you have other things to do than stick around here."

Xion rubbed the back of her head. "I'd stay longer if I didn't have a morning shift tomorrow. Do you have a gummiphone, we can stay connected that way."

"A...gummiphone? Sorry, I don't have one, but I know what you're talking about! Well, next time we see each other, I'll definitely have one."

"I'll look forward to it!" Xion approached the exit, then stopped at the door. "One other thing..."

"Hm?"

"I didn't mind when you held my hands earlier." Xion quickly slammed the door behind her and ran out of the mansion in a frenzy. By the time she reached the forest, she was out of breath, re-thinking her life choices. 'Why did I say THAT?! Naminé probably doesn't think much of me, she was always close to Roxas, right? They'll hit it off when they see each other again.'

But the smile on her face told a different story than the thoughts swirling around in her head. She held the drawing close to her chest, then set her sights back home, already thinking about where to put it.

Suddenly, everything went pitch black, though she was used to the darkness at this point. "Guess who~" A voice cooed in her ear.

"Someone who's bold enough to sneak up behind me, right?"

"You're terrible at these guessing games." The hands covering her face lifted and she saw Roxas smirking back at her with his keyblade slung behind his back. "Wow, what's with that stupid grin on your face?"

"Can't hide it, huh? I saw Naminé today and she drew me a picture!"

"...I didn't know she was here, I thought she was at Destiny Islands."

"I'm not too sure myself, you'd hear it best from her."

"She's probably in that old mansion."

"Yeah, I'm sure she'd love to see you again."

"Maybe some other time, I don't wanna bother her or anything!"

"But it's okay to bother me? I thought you guys were..." Before she could probe him anymore, Roxas ran off, presumably to fight more heartless. "What's his problem? I've never seen him act like that."

Following a short ride back on the tram, Xion made her way up a flight of stairs to reach their apartment. 'Why did we decide on on a room so high up, these stairs are killing me.' When she finally opened the door and walked inside, the distinct yet familiar smell of 'burnt' infiltrated her nose.

"Ugh, what is that?"

Lea waved at Xion with one hand while the other was maneuvering a pot handle on the burner, nevermind the wild fire raging in the small pot. "Welcome back kid, just cooking some of this ramen stuff."

"...why is it on fire?"

"Yeah it was taking too long to cook, thought I use some fire magic to speed up the process. It'll be done in a few seconds if you wanna give it a try."

"I'm good, thanks, but this isn't gonna set off the sprinklers again, is it?"

He chuckled. "Nah, you worry too much."

Xion slipped off her shoes at the doorway and sat down at the kitchen table. 'Between the two of us, we both have about 0 cooking skills.' "Oh, by the way, Naminé's in town, she's here on some type of mission."

"Really? Sounds like something she'd do," Once the fire went out, Lea poured something indescribable into a ceramic bowl. "Tell Naminé to come over sometime and I'll cook her some dinner."

"You're joking, right?"

Lea pulled out his chopsticks from the murky broth only to find they burnt down. "Yeah, I was...joking..." He muttered.

"Well I'll be in my room, don't give up, okay?" Xion went down the hall to her room where her bed was waiting for her. She fell on the soft mattress, hugging the drawing. 'I wonder if she thinks about me as much as I think about her.'

Xion rolled over on her stomach. 'Or if she thinks about my hair as much as I think about hers. Or if she thinks about my body as much as I think about running my hands along her...' As her mind drifted off, she began feeling hot, like summer heat hot or maybe closer to burning in a pit of fire. Her face flushed a bright red and she felt this tingly sensation arise from one concentrated area of her body.

"Wh-what's going on with me?! Is my body malfunctioning again, crap, where was that instruction manual again?" Xion dug through her closet, pushing away mountainous piles of clothes and weekly magazines to find her long discarded 'ANATOMY' book. She began flipping through the pages, "The answer should be in here somewhere...there we go!"

Xion scanned through a passage labeled 'female reproductive system'. The more she read, the more of an understanding she was developing. 'I got all the symptoms of arousal, so how do I get rid of it?' "Sexual arousal can be satisfied through sexual intercourse or from self-pleasure which includes..." She stopped reading.

"No way, I have to do THAT?! There's no way I'm doing something so gross!" Xion threw the anatomy book back in the closet, then plopped down on her bed. "Seriously, why would I ever do that. I'll just go to sleep, that'll calm me down."

When Xion closed her eyes, she could only think about Naminé which wasn't much help, so she gave in to her vices and swallowed her pride. Before all else, Xion locked the door and closed the blinds, not wanting anyone to see her during such a degrading moment in her life.

'Let's get this over with.' Her skirt and panties were the first to go on the floor with her bare butt on the bed. Xion now stared hopelessly at half-naked self, another wave of embarrassment preventing her from going all out. 'This is so humiliating I rather have a heartless bite my head off right now.'

"Ugh! Come on, I've dealt with way worse! This is nothing!" She jammed her fingers into her pussy back and forth, stabbing her insides. 'No, I don't think mutilating myself counts as self-pleasure. There has to be another way.' Trying a new approach, she moved her fingers in a circular motion around inside her vagina instead.

Finally, it started feeling good like the anatomy book described, great even. In fact the more she worked at it, the better it felt, although she was still embarrassed and resentful about it, "I don't know why anyone would do something so-" And then it hit her. Like really hit her.

An implosion of emotions exploded inside her. It was an indescribable pleasure that washed away all the tension in her body and she let out a loud, heavy moan just because of how fucking good it felt. I mean, why didn't anyone tell her about this sooner, surely her life would've drastically improved if she knew what her body was truly capable of.

"Oh god, that felt soooooooo good!" Once Xion collected herself, she stood up. 'That's weird, it feels like there's something sliding down on my leg.' She swiped up a sample of the mystery substance from her leg, inspecting it. "Ew, what is this? It's all sticky and gross, did that come from me..."

Much to her horror, she saw more of it smeared over her bed sheets. "...you have to be kidding me."

Xion changed into her moogle pajamas, then rolled up her blanket and bed sheet into a laundry bag. When she left her room, Roxas and Lea were gawking at her all wide-eyed as if she had two heads on her shoulders. "Hey guys...what's up?" She asked slowly.

"You okay, Xion?" Lea asked.

"What do you mean? Is something wrong?"

"Yeah, we heard this weird noise in your room, sounded like you were in pain or something," Roxas elaborated.

Xion stared at them in horror, unable to explain herself. "Um...well you see...uh..."

"Hey...it looks like she's gonna pass out! Roxas, go catch her before she-"

*THUMP

'God, if you're out there, please, please, please let this be the end of me.'

A/N: Thank you so much for reading!