Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, and the things you never want to lose.
A faint flicker of light warmed everything in its path as far as the farthest plain of the small town known as Resembool. It was early in the morning and no one bothered the outside calmness yet. The sun's rays barely touched the tip of the snowy mountain peaks. Dawn replaced the dark night sky. Some of the stars faded away to only show up in the same spots in a few hours.
Even the animals slept in the warm rays of the sun and dreamt of their dream worlds where they ran free and out of the humans clutches. Outside no one crept, but in one particular house where the lamp light pierced the darkness, a young girl hovered over sketches of new designs of her auto-mail. She was alone in her small room. Her grandmother gave her company as well as her beloved dog named Den on t hose lonely afternoons.
Her green wrap kept her blonde hair out of her eyes. Her specialized glasses helped improve her vision with those tight spaces. Her workload blocked her away from all her stresses and troubles from the outside world. The poor girl still had five orders to finish before the week ended. Although, she didn't mind at all. She would sacrifice her time for the sake of the greater good of people.
An arm and a leg…The thought pushed her more into her work. She knew lack of sleep was not a huge loss, unlike some who have lost everything to live for. Winry wiped the tiredness from her face, but her eyes were still droopy and heavy, begging for rest. She stared at her sketch and sighed. It still wasn't good enough for the man to work out in the fields with. It would be too dense and heavy for him to lift.
A yawn came out of nowhere and this time she gave into her body's needs. She took off her bandana and put on her pajamas. Winry decided to sleep on her design and hope for something better to happen in her dreams.
She lifted her covers and sat down. Before she lied down completely, she took out the rubber band out of her hair to make her feel free almost. The cold from the blankets contrasted with her body's heat, but in a good way. It felt nice to relax and spread out on the mattress. The girl closed her eyes and lifted her hand weakly to turn off the lamp on the nightstand, which was right next to her. After she did her action, she curled up in a ball on one side of the bed.
Darkness engulfed the room instantly. Her breathing became rhythmic in a few moments. As much as she wanted to fall asleep and forget her pain, and as much as she wanted things to change so she could be happy, she knew this was her life and nothing was going to change for her own selfish happiness.
Deep within your heart you know it's time to move on,
When the fairy tale that you once knew is gone
"How are the blue prints for the auto-mail going?" A voice broke the silence in the room.
Winry's chances of sleep were completely swept away now. Instead of relaxing, her body tensed and she wasn't able to swallow back her hidden pain. She pressed her lips together and did the most outrageous thing: She answered back.
"They've been going all right. Some have been driving me crazy. Nothing can always go our way. But, hey, that's life for you." To her surprise, her voice was calm and not urgent, although that's what she felt. "People are in worse positions than me. I shouldn't even be complaining to you of all—"
"Woah, now!" The boy's voice spoke up, "I asked 'how you doing.' I'm not your shrink!" There was a bit of humor in his voice and Winry couldn't help but miss hearing it on a daily basis.
"Sorry," Her voice lowered, "Edward… I guess my emotions got the better of me once again."
"Hey," Edward tried to cheer her up, "You are filled with emotions; we all are. We're only human after all."
Winry turned her body to the opposite way and for the first time in who knows how long met the gaze of the Fullmetal Alchemist. His cheek rested on his hand, which laid on the other pillow next to her. She didn't mind to be haunted by his sight. This is what she wanted, prayed, longed for a long time: A chance to say what she really felt, a chance to say goodbye, and to just… to just see him one last time.
"I guess you of all people know about random emotions, Ed. I mean one little word and you go ballistic," And for the first time since that heartbreaking departure, Winry truly smiled.
"Who are you calling little?" His voice darkened, but Winry still laughed.
Her laughter ceased as she looked up toward the ceiling and then at her childhood friend. "I wouldn't have it any other way. You did fill my life with excitement in a way no one else could have."
"Why Winry Rockbell… I think that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me." The boy had one of his famous grins on his face.
"Maybe…" She broke her gaze from him, "But that doesn't mean you always did the right thing. You did make me and Granny wait a long time for you to return home."
A silence came upon them again. It didn't bother them at all. They just looked at each other with no awkwardness or any thing, just pure tender moments that they would never get back in another lifetime.
"I miss this," said Edward not looking away from Winry, "just relaxing without the stress of our actions. I keep thinking about the times when we were little, before… you know…" The teen looked at his auto-mail arm.
She nodded in agreement with a soft smile on her lips. "Me too. You, Al, me… just running around like no one's business… having fun with no strings attached."
"I promise you one thing, Winry," Edward's voice became stern; "I will return Al's body along with mine back to normal; so we can make more of those precious memories."
His determined eyes saw her smile fade away. Winry looked disappointed, sad almost, at what he just said out loud.
"No… Ed," She said with much hurt in her voice.
"Why, what's wrong?" His face softened for her.
"It will never happen…"
"I don't understand?" Edward sat up on the bed. "Why won't it? I've been studying the Philosopher's Stone. If we can just get our hands on it—"
"No!" Her voice shouted, pleading. Once she saw his look, she calmed down for his sake. "Because you… you died Ed."
His look became confused. "But, I'm right here beside you," retorted Edward as he broke the silence in the small space.
"No… this," Winry's voice sounded broken, "this meeting isn't real. It's all in my head. My memories... That's all I have now."
"So…" Ed's voice drifted off, "does that mean I can't come and visit you every now and then?"
"I'd like that very much," A smile reappeared on her face.
He returned her action with one of his grins that made her heart flutter. "So in return for my visits, promise you won't forget me?"
"How can I ever forget the famous Edward Elric? The youngest State Alchemist to date." And although she said that with a bit of sarcasm, she hated herself for not saying anything else, what she really felt.
3 words, that's all she had to say…
"I gotta go now," Her heart jumped as his grin went away and was now replaced with guilt for leaving her, "so I'll see you in your next dream, okay?"
"You know it," Winry responded with a sad voice. Edward showed her one last smile and got up from his friend's bed. She heard his barely audible footsteps walking toward the door exiting her room. Her past and current feelings made her sit up in bed.
If there was just one wish I could be granted here tonight,
It would be to have you right back by my side
"Wait!" She shouted, holding back her tears that begged to be released. Ed turned to Winry and was surprised at her reaction. "Please… stay with me. At least until I fall asleep." She begged through her eyes.
Even more remorse filled inside Edward. He noticed the hurt in his friend's eyes. More than anything he wanted to rid the pain within her. The only thing was he wasn't sure if he could stay. But one look at Winry made him think differently.
"Sure." He stated in defeat.
All this time Winry was under the covers. She sank back onto her pillow and rested on her right side looking away from Edward and out of her bedroom window on to the never ending grassy plains. Winry felt the covers ruffle. Edward laid on top of them and placed his left hand on her shoulder. The two just rested next to each other about to fall asleep. They have never been this close before even when they were small. There was always a borderline, but now… this one moment was all she had to remember.
Winry closed her eyes as if she was going to fall asleep, but looked through a small crack through her eye lids. From where Edward was Winry knew he saw her actions and for some strange reason he closed his as well. Both knew very well that he wouldn't fall asleep, but he wanted to badly. More than anything in the world, she wanted him to be by her side so he could just protect her like he always did. But then Winry thought again. He always would be with her as long as she remembered him.
For a reason or another that Winry didn't want to understand, Edward's presence disappeared little by little. His hand was no longer on her shoulder and the bed didn't move when he got up. He simply faded into nothing, yet she felt his warmth still around her.
Her hand was shook out of anger, sadness, and many more emotions that she felt. She was sad that he was gone. And she was angry with herself for not saying what she truly felt. She was aggravated with the world in which horrible people, murderers and abusers, still lived on yet this one boy, who deserved more than anything to live a happy and fulfilling life, was gone from the face of the planet. Winry wanted to cry, but didn't allow herself to do it. He wouldn't have wanted her too anyways. Edward was gone for good. He would have said, 'the world will go on after one's death.' Life will continue like it did when her parents died, when Ed and Al's mom passed on, and surely now it would do the same thing after Ed's death.
But how could her world go on without him?
The philosophy Ed and Al preached, Equivalent Exchange, was inaccurate on so many levels. Sure some can't gain anything with sacrifice, but then again people born in poverty, who work their hardest, will most likely die in poverty. And the rich who were born into wealth don't have to lift a finger for it. Was it really fair for Edward to not live? His life was harsh. He had to grow at such a rapid pace and he will never get to live the life he imagined with his brother, Winry, and all his loved ones.
Worst part out of it all: Not many people will remember the Fullmetal Alchemist. He would just be replaced with another. Winry would make sure she will never forget him. Up until her dying day, she vowed to always keep Edward close to her heart.
As her mind began to relax, the quiet returned to the cramped room. And then, out of nowhere… Winry heard the words she longed to say to him and to hear from Edward himself:
"You know I love you, right?" She heard Edward's voice right next to her as if he never left.
A tear fell from her eye, that was all she allowed herself to shed. She quickly wiped it away and a hurt yet happy smile came upon her face.
"I know, Ed," Winry replied as she pulled herself together. "I think I always did."
Now it's time for me to find my happiness again
But the emptiness from missing you will never, ever end.
Sad ain't it? Haha but that's how I roll XP
This will be the last thing I post before I start school. Honestly I start tomorrow. DX
Not cool. Which means my stories won't be updated like they usually do. You must be patient. (Like I should be saying that 'cuz I'm so bad at waiting.)
This one shot/song fic came out of the blue when I saw this Degrassi mini episode with Liberty and JT. I based it off of that. So don't shoot me.
Oh and the quote I found on Wikiquote. It was citied from the show, The Wonder Years.
Let's get something straight, this will be the closest thing I'll ever get to a 'sex scene' lol
Okay, this song, When the Last Teardrop Falls by Blaque, so beautiful. I dare everyone who reads this to listen to it and not feel down in the dumps. Fun fact on my youtube account I made an AMV of this with Kingdom Hearts. So if you want to check it out type in my screenname: mizab090
Hoped you enjoyed it :D