Lois had walked away a few seconds ago, and for the first time...ever, I sort of wished she hadn't gone. For the briefest moment, I wished I hadn't asked Lex to pull those strings at Met U. I turned around to see if she was still walking away, but she was no where to be seen. I shook my head in disbelief, I was actually going to miss her. It was ridiculous, but it was true. Still shaking my head I slung my football bag over my shoulder and was about to run home, when I heard someone shout my name.

"Clark!"

It was a deep familiar voice, but I didn't immediately recognize it. When I turned around, I was looking at, well, me. I was older, wearing glasses for some reason, and I looked terrible. I was disheveled, my hair was a mess, and I had a five o'clock shadow growing on my chin, but it was definitely me. My jaw dropped.

"Y-You're-" I stammered.

"Yes, I'm you," he said simply.

"What're you-how're you-" I began but he cut me off.

"Look, I can't stay long, so I'll explain quickly. I came here from the future to warn you."

"O-Ok, what about?" I asked, still in a bit of shock.

"You can't get close to Lois Lane. I need you to stay away from her at all costs. If you have to be around her, you need to stick to a very strict conversation policy. No more playful banter, no more teasing, no flirting, and no more comforting. Only be polite and to the point, nothing more. Do you understand?"

"Flirt with Lois? Me? Am I insane in the future?"

"Look pal, I know what you were just thinking! Why do you think I chose to come back to this moment, you were just shaking your head because you realized that you were going to miss her."

"How could you possibly know that?"

"I'm you, remember? I stood right where you are thinking that once too."

"Right. But, why should I stay away from Lois, she's annoying, sure, but she's pretty harmless," I wondered to him.

"No, she's not harmless, she's worse than kryptonite," he said, not looking me in the eye.

"How can she be worse than kryptonite?"

"She becomes the love of your life. The one person you trust everything with, and who means everything to you."

"Lois?" I snorted in disbelief.

"Lois," he almost whispered it, like it was painful for him to just say her name.

"Well, I think you're crazy, but if she's the love of my life, why would you want me to stay away from her? And that still doesn't explain how she's worse than kryptonite?"

"One day you will lose her, and it will break you."

"What? Does she leave me or something, because I think I can handl-"

"No, it's not like that. It's terrible. Look, you'll lose a lot of people. People you don't think you can imagine life without, it'll be awful at first, but you'll get through it. With everyone else, you'll be able to move on, you'll come out on the other side stronger. But, losing Lois, you'll never recover from that," his voice cracked, "Never."

"You'll lose control, and do things you never thought yourself capable of. Doing what's right won't matter anymore, nothing will! You won't be the man the world needs, you'll put Earth's fate at risk. I used to think I couldn't live in a world where Lois didn't love me. I was wrong, I can live without her love, what I can't do is survive in a world she doesn't even exist in." His voice was trembling.

"I'm sorry, it sounds like she meant a lot to you."

"More than you'll ever know... at least I hope so. If you stay away from her, you can prevent her death. You have to promise me you'll do what I tell you."

"Alright, I promise."

"It's not going to be easy."

"I think I can manage it."

"No! Listen to me, right now you think she's bossy, irritating, and she gets under your skin all the time. The way you're looking at me, I know you think I'm crazy, and you're blinded to it because you're busy pining after Lana. But when you think about it, even now, for some bizarre reason, deep down, you think of Lois as one of your closest friends. Like sometimes she doesn't know you at all, but other times she knows you better than anyone. Those feelings will only grow stronger with time, trust me I know. You have to take this seriously, you can't let her get close to you, no matter how much you may want to! Her life depends on it."

I stared at him for a moment. His voice was grave, I was frightened by it. I'd never heard myself sound so...desperate. I nodded earnestly, I really didn't want anything to happen to Lois, he was right, I did think of her as one of my closest friends. I wasn't sure it was possible for me to fall in love with her, but I certainly didn't want her to die.

"I swear, my friendship with Lois Lane ends here," I told him firmly.

He studied me for a moment, making sure I was sincere.

"Thank you. Since Lois won't be around, there are some things I need you to know. First, you need to have a JLA member waiting on the corner of 12 street and Main on the night you use the Book of Rao," he told me.

"The Book of Rao?"

"It'll make sense when the time comes. Also, trust Chloe, if something is happening, something you aren't one hundred percent sure you can handle, leave her clues you know she'll be able to follow."

I nodded, "Alright."

He sighed in relief, before he took out a golden ring that had an L etched onto it's face.

"I have to go now, but please remember what I've told you."

"I will."

He slipped the ring on his finger and in a flash of white light he was gone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once again, I was standing in the middle of the Smallville high football field. Only I was back in the present, immediately I sped off to the farm, slipping the Legion ring in my pocket as I went. If my plan had worked, there would be no trace of Lois there. She would have never lived at the farm, her clothes would never have hung next to mine in our closet. Her White Snake pillow wouldn't be sitting on the couch, Old Blue wouldn't be resting in the kitchen window, and the smell of her perfume wouldn't be on the pillow next to mine. All of the little things that were constant reminders of her, reminders that tortured me, would be gone.

Within seconds, I tore into the house. I called for Shelby, but he wasn't there. Old Blue was gone too, and so was the White Snake pillow. That meant somewhere in the world Lois, my Lois, was alive! I ran outside and took to the sky. I flew as fast as I could to Watchtower. I was relieved to find that Chloe wasn't there. I went to the computer and furiously typed in Lois's name. A second later her address popped up on the screen, my eyes devoured it.

"Gotham?"

I reread it. Lois Lane, 2568 East Wayne Avenue Apt S508, Gotham City. Why would Lois be living in Gotham? I was confused, but then again I was in an entirely new reality. A reality where everything I knew about Lois could be different, a reality where I might not know her at all. I now knew that she was alive again, and that should have been enough for me. But it wasn't, I needed to see her, I needed to hear her heart beating one more time, then I could let go. I would have to.

One short flight to Bruce's home turf later, I was hovering just outside her apartment. Lois was fast asleep in her bed, I used my X-ray vision to look through the brick wall separating me from her bedroom. Seeing her unmistakeable sleeping form lying sprawled out on her bed, was the most beautiful sight I had ever beheld. I heard the soft, familiar sounds of her snores, and each distinct beat of her heart. The moment that broke me, the moment in which I had held her lifeless, silent, and deformed body in my arms no longer existed in this world. Here, Lois Lane was alive, and that was all that mattered.

A weight on my chest, that had kept it tight, cold, and empty was lifted. Tears of the purest joy I'd ever known watered in my eyes. For the first time in months, I felt the friendly embrace of hope in my heart. From the way Lois was snoring, I knew that not even a monster truck rally in her living room could wake her. So, quietly I snuck in through her bedroom window. I went to her bedside, the smell of her perfume filled my nose and I savored it. A long strand of her beautiful dark hair was draped across her face, I reached out and tucked it back behind her ear. I gently caressed her face, her skin was warm with life, and I closed my eyes in relief.

It was at that moment I realized that this could be the last time I'd ever be this close to her. I wanted to wake her, just so I could see her eyes looking back at me, but things were different now. If I wanted to protect her, if I wanted to protect myself, I couldn't have her. I would have to stay away from Lois, I wouldn't risk her life again. I bent down and slowly kissed her forehead. I brushed my hand across her face one last time, and whispered into her ear:

"Goodbye Lois."

As hard as it was, I somehow willed myself to turn my back on Lois and walk toward the window.

"Wait!"

Suddenly I felt her hand close around my wrist. I closed my eyes and sighed at the feeling of her touch, but I didn't turn around.

"What are you doing here?" She asked groggily.

It was wonderful to hear the sound of her voice, I wanted to turn around and kiss her into oblivion, however, I held my resolve.

"I just came to see that you were safe Miss Lane," I answered in the most detached voice I could muster.

"You flew all the way from Metropolis in the middle of the night, broke into my apartment, and came into my bedroom just to see that I was safe?"

I should have known that she'd see right through me, we used to joke that her superpower was that she had Clark-vision.

"Yes, Miss Lane, and now I have to go."

"Woah there Blue-boy, you're not getting away so easily this time. You look like hell! What happened? Will you at least turn around and look at me? I think with the breaking and entering considered, I at least deserve some eye contact!"

It was going to be a lot harder to do this than I thought.

"I'm sorry, but I have to go," I said quietly, taking a step toward the window.

"No, you don't get to do that! You don't get to whoosh away!" suddenly Lois was in front of me, with one hand on my chest. Her eyes burning into mine.

"If you were really just checking up on me, you didn't have to come in here. You have X-ray vision, you could have seen that I was safe from outside these walls. I want a better explanation than your ever present regard for my safety," she demanded.

"I can't give you one."

"Don't do that! Talk to me, please! You are always there to rescue me when I get myself into sticky situations, I don't know how you do it. But you're always there. As far as I can gather, I'm the only person you do that for. Every time, when I thank you, or ask how you got there so fast, or why you even bother, you always tell me the same thing, 'Just making sure you're safe Miss Lane'. That's the only god damned thing you'll ever say to me! I don't know whether I want to kiss you or kill you every time you say it!" she shouted.

"I...I don't know why, but ever since the first time the Blur saved me, I've had this feeling whenever I'm near you, or whenever I think about you. This feeling, it's bigger than any-anything... I've ever felt. I left Metropolis because it was too hard for me to know that I was pathetic girl who was dumb enough to fall for Superman. Surely the Man of Steel couldn't be in love with some silly reporter from the Daily Planet. But now here you are, in my apartment miles away from Metropolis, in the middle of the night. So maybe I'm not crazy, and maybe I'm not the only one with feelings. What's the real reason you're here Supes?" her voice was trembling.

I desperately wanted to tell her the truth pull her into my arms and tell her that I loved her, but that wasn't an option. So I came up with an excuse.

"The JLA thinks that someone is watching you, I was checking your apartment for bugs."

She let out a sad laugh.

"Of course... I should have known...you're all business," She said putting her face in her hands.

I knew how hard it was for her to say all of those things, Lois rarely put her heart on the line, because almost every time she had done it before someone had broken it. I had been the one to make her heart whole again. But, that was gone now, and looking at her I realized that I may have just delivered a shattering blow, crushing her heart worse than any one of the bastards before me. I'd just sacrificed everything to give her life back. I couldn't let her live it with a broken heart, not without at least an explanation. I reached out and put my hand on her arm. She looked up at me in surprise.

"Lois," I said, choosing my words very carefully, "I can't give myself the luxury of feeling for someone what you feel for me. If I did, that person would become my greatest weakness. I could never put someone in that position, and risk what the dangers of losing that person might do to me. Believe me when I say it's not that I don't want to feel it, it's simply that I can't allow myself to. I hope that helps you understand."

"That sounds like a pretty lonely way to live," she said looking me in the eyes.

"It's-it's not always ideal, but if I want to be the hero that the world needs, if I want to protect the people I care for, I have to make sacrifices so I don't get distracted from my purpose, Lois."

"Right, well I guess that makes sense."

"I'm sorry." I told her.

"It's okay, I think I understand. And at least you called me Lois this time," she replied with a sad smile.

It wasn't the answer she'd been looking for, I could see that in her eyes, but my words seemed to make her feel at least a little better. It was time for me to leave, so I pried my hand from her arm.

"Superman?" she said.

"Yes, Miss Lane."

"If you ever change your mind about the whole 'not-being able to feel' thing..."

"I won't." I said firmly.

"I know, but, hypothetically, if you ever did..."

"Hypothetically, I'm sure you'd be the first to know. Goodnight Miss Lane."

I flew out of the window, before she could ask me anything else. The night air whipped around me. I had left Lois hurt and alone, something that as her husband, I'd made a rule never to do. But I wasn't her husband anymore, I wasn't 'Smallville', I wasn't 'Clarkie' or 'farm boy', I wasn't even just plain 'Clark'. To Lois Lane I was just Superman. The man she loved, but could never have. The man who loved her, but could never tell her. This reality was going to challenge me, but it was better than a reality without Lois. Whether she knew it or not my heart would always belong to her. I loved her, I loved her enough to stay away