Hi! This is my first Tales of Symphonia fanfic, and also my first moderately depressing fanfic. I'm a huge ToS fan (the best game EVER!) and I also support the Lloyd/Colette pairing above all others. I just went against them this one time for the purpose of this fanfic. Also, I might have mixed up a few details or spelt a name incorrectly. I proofread as best I could, but we all miss something now and again!

Very Important: In this story, Lloyd didn't choose Colette, and Kratos is gone.

Enjoy!

The worst days were the ones when Colette wasn't busy.

There was still work left to be done in Iselia, after the attack by the Desians, and the fall of the Church. The fall of The Chosen. People didn't know what to believe. They wanted to hold onto their fate, but as news of Colette's journey and the tree spread, it was becoming more and more difficult.

Colette had been asked hundreds of questions. She'd been accused and praised, admired and hated. And she didn't know what to do. Not without Lloyd.

The world was in pieces, and Lloyd was gone on another journey. It was a good journey, one he'd decided to depart on with the purest intentions. How could ridding the world of exspheres ever be bad?

Lloyd wasn't the only one with plans. Zelos and Regal were making an effort, as much as they could with their standings of power within Tethe'alla. Presea was helping Regal. Raine and Genis were trying to unite the half-elves and help them fight the racism that still plagued the land. And Sheena...

In the end, everyone was doing something- doing what they could. But Colette? There was nothing she could do. It was because she'd been The Chosen that she'd had influence before, that she'd been needed. But now even that was gone.

They'd succeeded. They'd saved the world, defeated Mithos, watched the birth of a new tree, and she was still unhappy? Colette hated herself for it, but she found she couldn't rise above the self-pity.

Kicking her feet in the air, Colette slumped her shoulders, torn between sighing and giving way to the sobs constricting her body. But if she started to cry, she wouldn't be able to stop, and then Dirk might come out.

After she'd returned to Iselia- after Lloyd had left- Colette had started coming here, to the bridge that went over the river to his house. It was a comforting spot, a reminder of the times she'd spent with Lloyd and Genis when they were younger. Before they'd known about Tethe'alla and Mithos. Before they'd met the others. Before Lloyd met...

Colette swallowed the lump in her throat and gripped the wood of the bridge tighter, staring at the river. It helped, sometimes, to pretend that water was the remains of her tears, that she'd already cried herself out and didn't need to anymore.

It didn't help now.

She could never go back to those days, when the most important things were learning her duties as The Chosen and trying to keep Lloyd awake in class. She'd always been better at the former.

Colette smiled to herself, remembering the day it had all started. Lloyd hadn't just fallen asleep in class, but had fallen asleep during his punishment for falling asleep in class.

That was back when Lloyd still cared about her. When she'd left for the Temple, he'd wanted to follow. And he had, because Lloyd had always been stubborn that way. He still was.

Colette shook her head. No, she wasn't being fair. Lloyd still cared about her, the same way he always had. The way she'd thought she'd cared about him. The way she'd told herself she'd cared about him.

Lloyd had always thought of her as a best friend, like Genis, except more delicate. She was The Chosen after all.

And that was exactly why Colette had told herself Lloyd was her best friend, and nothing more. As The Chosen, she wouldn't have been able to have a family, get married. She knew the odds; that she would die making her journey to the Tower of Salvation, or die there as a sacrifice. She was prepared for that.

She couldn't fall in love, that would just end up hurting both of them. But she was going to hurt Lloyd anyways. He would be losing his best friend.

And that was all he would have lost, Colette knew. As much as she wanted to believe otherwise, Lloyd had never cared for her the way she'd cared for him.

No, those feelings he'd given to someone else.

Colette felt her shoulders shake and a sob escaped her lips. She'd gotten herself worked up again. The burning was at her eyes.

Dirk always came out to comfort her. He never said much, but he understood. That's why he let her come and sit on the bridge. He'd never told Lloyd, and Colette knew he never would.

Lloyd would never know.

Colette hugged herself. She'd be quiet about it this time. Dirk was as busy as ever in his blacksmith duties, catering not just Iselia but many other villages and towns that had suffered from the combining of the two worlds. Colette didn't want to disturb him.

That's when she heard it; the footsteps. They were faint, at first, following the dirt path. A soft squelching noise. They were getting nearer.

Colette froze. What if it was Lloyd, back to visit his Father? And what if he wasn't alone?

Bending forward, Colette clutched her stomach, trying to hide her face with her hair. She couldn't let Lloyd see her like this. Not after keeping it bottled up for so long.

The footsteps reached the bridge, sounding hollow.

Oh goddess, Colette thought, Please don't let it be Lloyd.

"Colette?"

Colette's eyes widened in surprise as she turned to the voice.

"Presea?"

Presea blinked back at her, grey eyes confused, then worried, "Are you crying?"

Colette whirled away, covering her face with her hands. Even if it wasn't Lloyd, she hadn't meant to show anyone.

She waited, not daring to say a word. The croak in her voice was back, she was sure. That croak she got when she was crying.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Presea step forward and sit down, swinging her feet over the side of the bridge, like Colette was doing. Presea didn't look at her though, just stared down the river with unreadable eyes.

"I was looking for you." she said after a long moment, "Your grandmother said you would be here."

"My grandmother..." Colette echoed. Her grandmother was the only other one besides Dirk that knew about her outings.

Presea nodded, "She's very kind. You're lucky to have her."

"Yeah." Colette said, forcing a smile, "I know."

Presea returned the smile. Family meant a lot to her, Colette knew, after Alicia. She meant what she said.

Colette tried to clear her throat, but wasn't confident in doing so silently, so gave up and spoke around the lump, "Are you here on business, Presea?"

Presea nodded again, intent on her boots as they swung in and out of view from under the bridge, "Representing Regal. He was busy at Altamira and couldn't make it."

Everyone was doing something. Everyone but her. "Wh-what is it about this time?"

Presea looked at Colette now, her mouth a thin line, her eyes penetrating. After a moment, she looked away and shrugged, "Relations between the Tethe'allens and Sylvarantians. Nothing much, really. I'm just going to observe and report back to Regal."

Colette nodded, racking her brain for another question. She didn't want to talk to anyone right now- even if it was one of her old teammates. She didn't talk here, on the bridge. That was the point of coming. So that she could think alone. And cry alone, if she was careful.

Not talk.

And so Presea spoke instead.

"Colette," she said, "What's wrong?"

Colette swallowed. Harder than she had before, but it didn't help. This was the one thing she hadn't wanted Presea to ask. Colette, despite her clumsy, honest nature, was good at keeping secrets. But if Presea looked concerned, and sound concerned- as she did now- it made Colette feel horrible.

She remembered the times, during her transformation into an angel, that Lloyd had questioned her. The time with the cup...

All of a sudden, she couldn't remember: Had it been warm or cold?

Presea was watching her. She reached up with her gloved hand and wiped Colette's cheek. Her finger pulled away, a speck of dampness at the centre.

"You don't have to tell me." she said.

And that's when Colette really started to cry.

Presea put an arm around her. She didn't ask anything. She didn't say anything. She just let Colette sob against her shoulder.

It was getting worse. Everything was. And now the tears were too. They were lasting longer, she was crying louder. As loud as she could, and even then it didn't feel like she'd let it all out. If anything, it felt like she was holding back more and more.

She didn't hold back with Presea. She sobbed until her throat was sore and Presea's shoulder was wet with tears. The grey-eyed girl didn't complain though, or push her away.

So finally, all cried out, Colette pushed herself away.

"I- I know I shouldn't," Colette hiccuped, "I shouldn't feel like this. I didn't- didn't lose anyone. No one I loved died... b-but I..."

Presea's eyes creased as a sad smile lit her face. It was a beautiful smile, and Colette knew that- despite the differences in their situations- Presea understood.

"I- I miss him." Colette whispered.

"I know." Presea said.

Then the girl got up, dusted off her dress, and offered a hand to Colette. At first, Colette could only stare at it.

"I don't have to leave today." Presea said, "The meetings not until tomorrow evening. Let's go for a walk."

Colette rubbed her sleeve across her eyes and accepted Presea's hand with a smile.

"I'll show you around!" Colette said, with more of her usual perkiness, as they started down the path, "Have you seen the Temple yet?"

Presea shook her head.

"We can go there now! Before it gets dark! You can stay at my house tonight- my father won't mind, and if there's time before you leave tomorrow..."

The two girls disappeared into the trees, leaving the bridge and the river behind.

From his forge, Dirk watched the two go and smiled to himself. The girl, Presea, would be back again, he was sure of it. And Colette, he was also sure of, would not be returning to the bridge.

That's it! Like I said, this is my first time posting this genre, and though I doubt many people will find this fanfic, please review if you feel up to it! I'd really appreciate the feedback!

Thanks for reading!