Lily's Hogwarts Career
The breeze was nonexistent through the small 2nd floor window. Two young girls were talking underneath the covers that we not needed because of the heat from the summer.
"Lily, can you believe you are coming to my school next year? I know you're going to love it. The classrooms are huge compared to your primary school. I'll get to eat lunch with you and see you all the time."
"I know Tuny, I'm excited. But I'm kind of scared. Were you scared?"
"No I wasn't, but I'm normal, normally people don't get scared of school."
"What do you mean?"
"You're not normal Lily."
"Yes I am."
"No you aren't!"
Lily looked at her disappointedly; her quiet voice could be barely heard, "Why do you think that I'm not normal?"
Petunia starred at Lily with her round soft eyes, "Lil's you just aren't. Normally people can't push me on the swings without touching me, or opening and closing the petals on flowers. They just can't. You can, you're different."
"Is it bad to be different?"
"It depends. I'll always love you Lil's no matter what other people think you'll always be my little sister. We'll always have each other, I promise."
The owls swept through the Great Hall like they have for the past 5 years. I never received a letter unless it was a holiday. My parents will occasionally write but they hadn't this year. They knew how busy I am with prefect duties and my immense school work. However sure enough a school owl (since I haven't obtained my own yet) flew by and dropped a small letter. The hand writing was familiar. I had seen it before but not in a long time, before Hogwarts at least. I broke a seal and read,
You and a guest are cordially invited to
The Marriage of
Mr. Vernon S. Dursley to Miss Petunia A. Evans
On December 21st at 2 O'clock
RSVP by October 1st
I couldn't believe it, Petunia, getting married. She didn't even tell me she just invited me. I bet I won't even be in the wedding unless mom steps it. At least I got invited. I starred at the letter until Lanie spoke, "Lily, earth to Lily? Are you okay? LILY!"
"Oh sorry, it's my sister."
Lanie looked frightful; with the current war amongst wizards she knew no one was safe, even muggles. With her shaky voice she asked, "Is she okay, how about your parents?"
"They're fine... Petunia is getting married." My thoughts lingered downwards toward the invitation sighing deeply. Petunia and I had always talked about our wedding days and how we would help each other plan them. I knew there was no way of that happening now. Seeing as Tuny hasn't really talked to me since I got my Hogwarts letter. She has one word for me, "FREAK." It's either "freak dinner," or when she's forced to say goodbye for the school year, "Bye freak."
I only then realized Lanie still blabbing along, "That's amazing. Who's the guy? Is he hot? Is he a muggle? Do you know him? I wonder where they will go for their honeymoon. Do you know the color she has chosen? You'd look great in a green maid of honor dress." Pausing to breath she had time to think, "Why don't you sound happy? She is your sister you should be happy for her."
"I am. I'm just tired. I was up late last night working on our potions essay." I've never told anyone about Petunia and I. "Lily that essay isn't due for a week, geez this year will not be different." I didn't mention Petunia calls me a Freak or how she never looks at me. I couldn't bare it, and truthfully I've never let anyone get close enough to me. Lanie is great, but I don't want her to end up like Petunia and I did.
"When is it?"
"December 21st."
"I hope it snows for them, that would be beautiful, don't you think?"
"Yeah, sure…"
I was no longer listening to Lanie. Looking down the Gryffindor table there were the maurders. The four of them were connected by some evil force to make my life hell. Sirius Black, the ladies man, the main prankster and the life of the party. There were rumors that he had kissed every girl in their year except three, Lanie, Alice, and I. Sirius's co-leader of the maurders is the infamous James Potter. James and I have never gotten along. On our first trip to Hogwarts he made a comment about my hair and tipped our boat into the lake. I truly believe our hate stemmed from there. James Potter is an arrogant show-off and has nothing better to do then annoy my friends and me. Not all the maurders are like this, there's Peter but he's just a sidekick. They usually use him as a decoy for their pranks. I almost feel bad for him. Remus is the other Gryffindor Prefect. I think Dumbledore gave him the position to help control his friends. Remus is also a werewolf. He doesn't know I know. I figured out about midway through our third year. I feel envy for Remus being a werewolf and not being able to tell his friends. They can be completely thick sometimes. Remus caught me staring, oh great here they come; now breakfast is ruined.
"Hey Lily, how was your break?" "Fine thanks, what about you Remus?" Remus is the only maurder who I can stand talking to. "It was okay, hung with the maurders mostly." Remus and I are prefects together and we've bonded much more than anyone could imagine. Remus had to tell me last year that he was bitten by a werewolf when he was young. Although, I've know since 2nd year. I noticed he went home every month to see his ill mother. Once I asked him about how she was doing and he looked confused for a moment, came up with a quick response, then change the topic immediately.
I don't understand how someone as sweet as Remus can be friends with the rest of the maurders. Sirius is a ladies' man. He has dated almost every girl at Hogwarts. And has the record for most detentions served. James has been the greatest annoyance. First year he tipped our boat over, made fun of me for my red hair and laughed at me when I asked what Quidditch was. Ever since 3rd year he has taken the liking to asking me out every day. He has also owled me every week asking me to go to Hogsmeade. And Peter just doesn't talk much. No, he doesn't talk at all.
Remus started talking to Alice about her summer. I tuned out, I can only hear about Longbottom so much before I will have to kill myself. Everyone knows they'll get married. I was talking to Dumbledore and he doesn't think they will wait a month after graduation. It's amazing they found each other so young. Petunia's fiancé doesn't know the true Tuny. Vernon doesn't know that I'm a witch or of Petunia and my relationship. When we were younger we had everything planned out perfectly. I'll never forget our plans. I was about 5 when we started planning. We were going to have a double wedding. Our honeymoons would be in Hawaii. We would have white dresses and our bride maids dresses would be pastel colors. And now Petunia is getting married without me, because I'm a freak, who she never talks to. I don't even have a boyfriend so I guess it will be just me at the wedding unless I can get Remus to go with me. We're mutual friends, so it's a possibility.
"Hi Lily, have a good summer?" It was James this time. He never left me alone; he was always an arrogant prat. He always had to be around me even though he knew I hated him. Without looking at him, "It was fine Potter." Sirius and Peter had taken chairs across from Alice, Lanie and I. James however sat down next to me. Don't react to it; it will only give him a reason to talk to you. Don't say anything to him. James reached for the letter left abandoned on the table. "Potter give that back!" "What is it?" The white lacy paper fell into James's hand. His eyes searched the invitation, his eyes beamed, "Is this your sister? I didn't know you had a sister." I couldn't say anything to him. Admitting it to him that I'm not perfect would let him mock me forever. James knew this wasn't like me. I usually have a clever come back, at least for him. "Lily are you okay?" I shook my head no. For some odd reason I knew I could tell him and he wouldn't make fun of me for it. Maybe it was the sincerity in his voice when he asked if I was okay. I knew he would understand. I could trust James with my secret about Petunia and I. "No, Potter. I'm not." "Lil's you want to talk about it?" "Sure come on." I looked toward Alice and Lannie; both were distracted with Remus and Frank, they wouldn't see us go. However, Sirius looked at James and I as if the world was about to end. I lead Potter out of the Great Hall though the entrance hall and toward the grounds. "Lily it's cold out, are you sure." "Oh yeah I'm sure, unless you don't think you can handle it" he wouldn't be able to back out of that challenge. He has a firm body that makes all the females in Hogwarts worship the ground he walks on. I caught the glint in his eyes and knew the relationship between Potter and I had changed, no matter how much we didn't want it to. His smile reassured me to continue toward the black lake. James took off his cloak and wrapped it around my shoulders. Something about the cloak made me feel secure. I think it was his warmth. I've never seen James like this he never cares about anyone else. "Let's go." James held open the door for me and followed my lead. I sat next to one of the birch trees and sighed deeply. "Lily what is that letter about?" "It's kind of hard to explain" I couldn't look at James. I could feel his eyes dying to make contact with mine. "My sister, she's getting married." A silent tear streamed down my face. He looked at me clueless. He didn't know how to comfort a crying girl. That's kind of cute. Did I just think of James as cute? Oh God the world must be ending. After a lack in sound he spoke quietly and sincerely, "Is getting married a bad thing? I thought eventually everyone wanted to get married. At least I do." James looked sincere. I've never seen him care about anything, except maybe when Sirius was in the hospital wing for three weeks. Wait did James just say he wants to get married? He did. Wow who knew the playboy would ever settle down. Looking up into his eyes I could tell he could be trusted with my secret. "James my sister and I don't get along well." He looked at me and grinned his faithful grin "Most siblings don't get along. Do they?" "We did before…" "Before what?" Looking out to the lake I remember us going swimming in the summer and baking cookies on Christmas. "Lil's before what? Before Hogwarts? Or before this summer?" Tears streamed down my cheeks. "Before I got my Hogwarts letter, we were friends. She hasn't spoken more than two words since I've left for Hogwarts. We were best friends.
And now she's getting married, she doesn't even want me there. But I have to go and I have no one to go with. It's going to be miserable. She'd never forgive me if I brought someone of our type. She doesn't care for witches or wizards. She'd die if I brought Severus. She knows him. We grew up in the same neighborhood. Did you know that? That's why I have always stuck up for him no matter how much he deserved the pranks you pull. I can't believe I'm telling you this. I can see myself telling Remus because I know his secret so it would only be fair to tell him mine but I don't know. James please do not tell anyone what I've told you. I've never even told Lanie or Alice."
I could feel myself shaking and not being able to hold in my imperfections anymore. Before I knew it James had his arms around me holding me tightly telling me everything was going to be okay. He looked downward into my eyes, "You haven't spoken to you sister since you were eleven?" I glanced upwards seeing his beautiful hazel eyes, "No, she calls me a freak and that's about it. I used to try to talk to her but found it useless." He loosened his grip on me, still holding me at arm's length, "Lily you can't blame yourself for your sisters biased opinion, she just the opposite of old pure bloods." I dropped our eye contact, "Yes it would be rude not to go, but if you need a date I'll go with you. I mean, I know I'm not you're first or any choice of a date but I'll always be here for you Lil's." He let go of me and backed away a bit probably expecting a slap for being bold. "Thank you James, you have no idea how much that means to me. I would love for you to come with me." His eyes were like magnets, being attracted to him by the second. I threw my arms around him and hugged him. His lips looked beautiful; one quick kiss couldn't hurt right? After a quick peck on the lips I turned away from him and started to walk off to the castle.
"Wait Lil's what secret of Remus' do you know?" James came running up behind and draping his arm around my waist. My stomach twisted. I felt like everything I once knew was gone, the world was so unpredictable at that moment. "I don't think I can tell you. I shouldn't have even mentioned he had one." "Remus has many secrets, but the maurders share all secrets it's the rule." James looked trustworthy I couldn't help but ask, "Do you know where he goes every month?" "Yes I do. And it's not home." My muscles relaxed, "Oh great you do know." "Yeah, I go with him it helps the transformation." James risks his health every month for Remus, it is not safe. "James no, it's dangerous he could bite you. What would you do then? What would I do then, I can't lose you James." "Lily, I promise I won't get bitten. He can't bit me because only humans can be bitten." "What the hell do you mean only humans? If you haven't noticed you are a human." "I'll tell you but you have to promise to say nothing to anyone. You can't tell the maurders I told you because that would be bad." He looked scared. He was willing to trust me with something he couldn't even trust his friends with? This isn't the James Potter I knew. "James what is it?" "We're anamagis…" "Really that's very advanced magic. When did you become one? Can you show me? Wait, James that's illegal! Not to mention dangerous!" "Lily don't worry about me. We're careful; we've been doing it since 3rd year. And no I can't show you here we're too out in the open."
I can't believe James was doing this for his friend. He was putting himself at risk once a month to help Remus. "James, I'm sorry." I can't look him in the eyes I've hurt him so much this past years. Calling him an arrogant prat and yelling at him every chance I got. "Why are you apologizing Lil's? You haven't done anything." "James I judged you before I actually knew you, I can never forgive myself for that." His cold hard lifted up my chin so I had no choice but to stare into his beautiful eyes. "Everyone judges Lily. I can't hate you for that. I could only hate you if you kept those judgments." "James, kiss me" His breath tickled my neck and I could feel the warmth of his lips close to mine.
"James! What the hell do you think you are doing?" Dam, Sirius you have to ruin everything. James looked back and forth from Sirius and me. Not knowing what he was supposed to do. He was stuck in between his best friend and I. "Sirius, Lily and I were just talking." "Oh sure I believe that. What about James?" James glanced to me and I couldn't hold his starred. He was going to tell Sirius and why should he keep my secret, they have been friends since first year. James just sighed and said, "Sirius, I can't tell you. It's personal." Sirius gave James a death glare and then turned to me. "You shouldn't talk to him. Lily don't pretend to be nice to him. Don't use him for your own good. Just be your true rotten self, which you've always been." What did he just say? Does Sirius really hate me that much? James was struggling on whether to punch Sirius or not.
I can't just stand here and let him insult me. I ran as fast as I could from the birch tree into the room of requirement. I couldn't let Sirius know that his words affected me so much. It changed into my bedroom from back home. It was purple and blue vertically stripped walls with yellow stared border around the middle. Everything was just how I had left it when I left before my first year. Everything was innocent and beautiful. My canopy bed was sitting on the opposite wall. I just kept running until I landed on it. My safe haven was the only place I felt comfortable at Hogwarts. I curled up into my bed and slept until the next morning.
I couldn't avoid James for long. We had every class together. Transfiguration was our first class of the day. I of course, opted out of breakfast in the Great Hall and ate in the room of requirement. The corridors were almost empty with a few students floating in or out of the Great Hall. I've always thought it's better to get to class early and not have to talk to Potter because he and his posse are always late. Today was different.
I walked into the classroom and there was James sitting at his desk. Oh God, he's actually early and we are alone together. I have to get out of here. I spun around to leave the classroom when Potter says, "Lily, please stay." Okay fine but I'm not talking to you. I quickly sat in my desk and Potter sits next to me. The nerve of this guy thinking I'll forgive him for doing nothing. "Lily, I'm sorry about yesterday." He looked for some response. When he realized he wasn't going to get one he continued. "I hit Sirius, I've never hit Sirius. I told him you were having a family issue and you needed to talk about it. He seemed okay with it. I told him we were only friends."
Friends, only friends I asked you to kiss me and we're only friends. Great, just what I was hoping for another friend. "Lily, I want to be more than your friend. However, I understand that you don't care for me so I'll stop hoping for the dream to ever come true." I can't believe this. When I'm finally ready he gives up. "James, are you really going to let Sirius influence you this much? How do you know I haven't changed my mind?" He looked at me confused and utterly speechless. McGonagall had to choose a bad moment to come in. James and I couldn't talk about it now that there was a Professor in the room. "I'll talk to you later James." Alice had walked over to the table just then. Potter sits with Black during transfiguration. And Alice and I are usually partnered up, "Uh Lily, do you mind if I work with Frank today? We were having a really interesting conversation and I'd hate for it to end." Everyone in their year knew Frank and Alice were going out and would try every class to work together. "Go ahead Alice. I don't mind."
While taking out my transfiguration book I realized Potter was still sitting next to me. "James aren't you going to work with Black?" "Oh no, he's working with Peter. Remus is ill and it's Sirius' month to have Peter. Do you mind if I work with you?" "I guess not. Are you actually going to work or will you be thinking about what I said the entire period?" "I'll be thinking, unless of course you'd like to clear it up for me." "Okay. Don't stop trying. I'll be really disappointed if you do." I can't believe I just said that to James. He defiantly knows now. "Lily would you like to go to Hogsmeade with me next trip?" "James I'd love to. I always thought you'd ask."