Silver Doe Missing Moment – slightly AU
"Hermione, can we talk….please?" Ron asked, parking himself at the foot of her cot.
"I'm not sure I need to hear anything you have to say, Ronald." She answered coolly, never looking up from her book.
Ron let out a small sigh. He was expecting her reaction and tried to ignore his beating heart. "You don't deserve to listen to me talk but I can't live with myself if I don't say this." He paused. "Please? Look at me, Mione." He was desperate to touch her, to feel her skin for the first time in weeks but he was petrified of upsetting her more.
Hermione's heart sank at the softness in his voice. He was pleading with her and she couldn't resist it. Her eyes fluttered to his, brown meeting electric blue. Immediately her lips began to tremble and the tears began flowing down her face. She hung her head in her hands, trying to hide herself from his view, from the world. She wanted to feel nothing but joy at his return but he had spoiled that for her by the manner in which he left. Ron had abandoned her and she never understood why.
Ron scooted toward her shaking frame, slowly reaching for her hands, pulling them away to reveal her face to him. He could tell she was struggling with an awful internal battle, similar to his own. She was stuck somewhere between pride and weakness. He tilted her chin to look into her eyes and wiped away her tears. Suddenly, Ron dropped to the floor in front of Hermione's cot, on his knees, looking intently back at her, as if nothing else in the world existed. Hermione noticed how manly he looked, how grown up. "I've said it before and meant it but I am so sorry, Hermione. I need you to know what happened. I'm not sure how you'll react but first I need you to know that what I did to Harry and to you, well…I will never forgive myself for that."
Hermione sniffed, continuing to wipe her face, attempting to gain composure. She nodded and Ron continued. "I wasn't myself. That damn locket, it…it changed my brain. It made me forget why I was here. It made me think the things that could be true, were true. Little things that don't make sense now. They seemed so right before." He growled in frustration as he struggled to make sense.
Hermione sunk to the ground next to him, turning slightly to face him directly. She spoke in a throaty, emotional voice. "What sort of things, Ron? I don't know what you mean."
Ron sucked in a huge gulp of air. This was it. He was about to lay it all out on the line. "A few hours ago, when I destroyed the locket…it showed me something. Harry opened it, I was supposed to stab it and it was supposed to be over, like that. It spoke to me, The Dark Lord did. He knew what to say to hurt me the most." He took Hermione's hand in his but focused his eyes on the floor, unable to face any sort of unfavorable reaction from this beautiful girl. After all, he had always been aware that Hermione deserved someone much better than himself. Even with the locket destroyed those insecurities lingered in Ron's gut. Maybe she was in love with Harry and Harry was just oblivious. Or maybe she wasn't interested in anyone like that right now. He continued, "I saw a vision. Harry saw it too. It was you and Harry standing together. He told me my mum loved me least and wished Harry was her real son, not me. You told me…" he felt the first drop fall from his eye and splash Hermione's hand. He breathed in and out, hoping to compose himself. His voice had never held such emotion, "You told me that I am your second best. Said no girl would love me as long as I was friends with Harry Potter. You kissed him….he didn't kiss you, you kissed him. You were in love with him, and laughing at me." This time it was his turn to sink his face into his hands.
"Ron…" Hermione whispered.
He coughed and sniffled, "I'm sorry. I'm trying not to cry like a baby. I know what I felt was no excuse to leave you. Mione, I'm nobody special. I get that. But I guess somewhere deep inside I've always hoped that maybe an amazing person like you could think I was first, not second best. Right after I left…the feeling of not seeing you, of not being sure of where you were, if you were safe and if you needed someone to keep you warm…well, that feeling was worse than thinking that you might love Harry more than me. "
Hermione's heart broke. She cleared her throat, "Ron…" she tried again. This time he looked up into her eyes, his chest filled with stilled air, waiting to gauge her reaction. "Don't ever leave me again!" She spoke in between wrenching sobs. She threw herself forward and buried herself in his embrace. She could feel his tears on her head as his hug threatened to crush her lungs. "Promise me!" She cried into his shirt.
"I promise. I swear on my life, Hermione." He planted a kiss on top of her head. She pulled back and smiled, really smiled. It was full of relief and awe and Ron had never seen anything more beautiful. Hermione saw something in his eyes. Insecurity… and desire. Ron wanted to kiss her; she felt his eyes on her lips but could sense his fear. He needed reassurance, he needed to know that the vision from earlier was completely false. She gulped, not sure how to begin.
She wiped her face again and chuckled a bit. "I love Harry. He's one of my best friends. He's like family. But Ron, I've been in love with you for the last three years. You've always been the one, nobody else. Not Viktor, never Harry…only you." She tried to force a smile through her fresh tears.
Ron's expression was blank, trying to compute her words. He lifted his hand to her cheek and guided her face toward his. He paused just for a second before touching his lips to hers. He kissed her slow and soft, marveling at the sensation. Ron Weasley was kissing Hermione Granger. He deepened the kiss, his fears and insecurities melting away. He pulled back, knowing their conversation wasn't over yet. "I love you, Hermione." He whispered.
She beamed. "I love you too, Ron." She leaned in to kiss him again, loving the passion she had been waiting so long to feel. Suddenly she felt the need to lie down. While the last few minutes had given her everything she'd ever wanted from Ron, he had once again left her emotionally exhausted. She lay back onto the cot, pulling Ron down with her. He pulled her blanket over them both and smiled as he felt her drift to sleep. Ron placed a row of kisses down her jaw and grinned until sleep overcame him as well.