ALREADY FALLING
A 3x22 AU
I never thought that
You would be the one to hold my heart
But you came around
And you knocked me off the ground from the start
Josh checks his phone for at least the dozenth time, cursing under his breath at the unreturned message. He'd gotten off work early for a reason, because he hasn't seen his girlfriend in a couple weeks, and he wants to take her to dinner. But she isn't answering his texts or his calls, and the knocks on her door have yielded no response, so he finally turns and heads out of her building.
He goes to the precinct; it isn't the first time in their relationship that she hasn't answered him, although it does nag in the back of his mind that lately, she's been answering his calls less and less.
The desk sergeant at the Twelfth greets him warmly, signs him in without calling upstairs. He's been trying to make more of an effort with Kate, but if he's honest with himself, it feels like she has one foot out the door. And he does too.
He arrives to a busy fourth floor, spots Captain Montgomery in his office, and Detectives Ryan and Esposito at their respective desks. Kate is nowhere in sight; in fact, her desk is clear, computer off, and if he didn't know any better, he'd think she hadn't come into work. Her writer tag-a-long is nowhere to be found, as well. If she wasn't at work, though, she'd be home, and she hadn't been answering…
"Josh?"
He looks up from Kate's desk to find Ryan and Esposito - the boys, as Kate affectionately calls them - both staring at him. It's Ryan who spoke, and he approached them, threw another glance at his girlfriend's desk. "Hey, is Kate around?"
The two detectives shared a look, and this time it was Espo who explained. "She didn't tell you?" At Josh's shake of his head, he continued. "Her old training officer was killed, man. We were stonewalled by the LAPD, so she took a couple personal days."
Josh shakes his head again, this time in confusion. "Personal days? She's not at home though."
"She went to LA, dude. To find Royce's killer."
"Oh." The question is on the tip of his tongue, and he doesn't want to ask it, doesn't think he wants to know the answer, but still, he has to ask. "Did she go alone?"
The silence and slight shake of Ryan's head is all he needs to know.
He doesn't call her right away. He wanders the city for a couple hours, needs to calm down from the reality of his girlfriend across the country with another man.
A man who makes no secret of the fact that he's in love with her.
Kate wouldn't cheat on him, he knows that. Well, he hopes. And he hopes that Castle would show enough respect not to make a move. Still, the more he thinks about it, the more upset he gets.
She flies to another city, across the country, and doesn't think it's important to let her boyfriend know?
By the time he gets back to his apartment, he can't wait anymore. He needs to talk to her. He can't compete anymore with another man.
It's time.
"Hi, Josh." Her voice is soft, and he hears the click of a door in the background.
"I stopped by your apartment today," he begins, no greeting, and Kate sighs. "Thought I'd take you out for dinner, but you weren't there. Or at the precinct."
"No, I'm in LA."
"With him," he interrupts before she can continue. "You're in LA with him."
Kate sighs again, and he hears movement of her sitting on something, presumably the bed in her—their?—room. "My old training officer was killed, so I came out here to solve it. Castle's just here to help."
Josh scoffs. "Right, help. He gonna help you relax, too?" He's being irrational, he knows, but he's always had to compete with the writer for Kate's attention. He has no idea how many dinners Kate has had to postpone or cancel because she caught a body—which he knows isn't Castle's fault, but Castle is who he hears Kate call when she leaves.
Castle. It's all Castle.
"I told you, Josh, he's here to help me solve the case. That's it."
"It's always a case though," Josh argues. "You had drinks with him on Valentine's Day, you guys go out to dinner all the time. You see him more than me, and I'm your boyfriend!"
Kate falls silent. Josh is about to apologize for his outburst when she replies. "Well, he's my best friend. And if you can't deal with that, then we can't be together."
Josh rolls his eyes. Best friend, all right. He's seen the way Castle looks at Kate, the way his eyes light up when she's around him. The man is crazy for her, and he can't hide it to save his life. "God, Kate, you know he's not there to just help you with the case," he insists. "He's had feelings for you all along!"
"Yeah, well," Kate snaps, "maybe I have feelings for him too. I'm sorry I didn't do this sooner, but we're over."
Josh sighs. It was coming, but it hurts to be the recipient of the words. "Yeah, we are. Good luck in LA."
He shouldn't be listening.
He can hear her through the door, drawn to it when he heard her phone ring as she bid him good night. He'd heard her greet her boyfriend, a long pause, and when he'd heard her say the name of the city they were in, he'd known.
Judging by his partner's short, clipped tone, she's not happy with Josh. He hears her say his own name...oh.
Josh knows that Kate is in LA with another man. And while Rick knows that nothing's happened—not for lack of desire, at least on his part—and so does Kate, her reassurances seem to fall on flat ears.
"I told you, Josh, he's here to help me solve the case. That's it." He hears a long pause, then, "Well, he's my best friend. And if you can't deal with that, then we can't be together."
Rick's jaw drops at the next words he hears.
"Yeah, well, maybe I have feelings for him too. I'm sorry I didn't do this sooner, but we're over."
He hears footsteps approach the door and begins his retreat back to the couch, but the door swings open before he takes a third step. He turns when he hears Kate chuckle, and tries to look at least a little sorry. "Everything okay?"
Kate smirks at him. "I think you know the answer to that question."
"How's Josh?" he asks after a few moments.
"He'll be fine." Kate lets out a deep sigh and brushes past him to sit on the couch. "We broke up."
Rick hesitates, but when she doesn't elaborate, he joins her, can't help but notice that they're in the same spots as before. "I'm sorry," he says, quiet, hoping he sounds more sympathetic than he feels.
Kate scoffs. "I'm not. It was only a matter of time." She turns to face him, props her elbow on the back of the couch and her head in her hand, mirroring her pose from earlier that evening. "It's been over for awhile. I don't even know why I stayed with him for so long."
"What happened?"
"Apparently, he got off shift early and went by my place to take me to dinner." She shrugs. "I wasn't there, obviously. Or at the precinct. And…" She pauses before looking up at him. "And he knows that you're here too. Needless to say, he wasn't thrilled."
Rick resists the temptation to reach out for her, to brush the hair from her forehead and place a reassuring kiss to her mouth. "I'll bet he loved that we're sharing a suite," he quips.
"I didn't even mention that." Kate chuckles and shakes her head. "I've been so stupid," she says, rolling her eyes.
"No you haven't."
"Yes," she argues, the single syllable holding a conviction he didn't expect, "I have. You remember that dirty bomb case when we were in that tent, and I was saying how I wanted to have someone and we could just be there for each other?"
She isn't looking at him, gaze dropped to the space between them, head dipped so her hair hides the barely visible stain of red to her cheeks, but he nods anyway, waits for her to continue.
"At that point, I wanted it with Josh," she says, looking up at him at last, allowing him to see the spark of certainty in her gaze, the gleam of love as she stares back at him. "But I was so blind, I didn't even see that that person was right in front of me."
His breath hitches, heart flipping in his chest, skipping a beat at the well of hope within him.
"Kate-"
He hears the surprise and hint of confusion in his own voice, as she takes his hand, uses it to tug herself closer to him. Her other hand frames his face and she leans close, eyes fluttering closed when her nose nudges his.
"It's been you this whole time," she whispers before she's leaning closer, claiming his mouth with hers.
He lets out a low groan when he feels her thigh press against his, hands bracketing her waist and he guides her onto his lap. "Kate," he moans when she pulls away. "I…"
"Me too," she says, dropping her forehead to his. She sifts her fingers through his hair and pulls back far enough that he can catch her gaze when she searches for his. "But not yet. Royce's killer first. Then we can talk?"
He kisses her again, his fingers tightening around her hips when she rolls against him. "That's not talking."
Kate chuckles, but slides off his lap and stands. "Later," she says, words laced with promise. She squeezes his hand before letting go. "Tomorrow. Good night, Rick."
Risking our hearts is why we're alive. The last thing you want is to look back on your life and wonder, if only.
She looks over to the man next to her, smiles at herself when she notices that he's asleep.
At first she hadn't wanted to read Royce's letter, the pain from his betrayal months before still raw, but she's read it so many times she almost has it memorized. Her mind drifts back to her last encounter with her former mentor, when she'd seen him for the man he'd become, the one more concerned with his paycheck than their friendship.
She'd been heartbroken, of course, the feelings she'd once had for him dulling since he'd left the force, but never fully extinguished. She'd thought that she wouldn't be able to move on, even after his betrayal. Even her budding feelings for Castle had been just that: something simmering. Something new, that had begun as physical attraction, that she once couldn't see becoming any more than that.
But throughout their two-year partnership, despite the hurt he'd caused, the heartbreak she'd suffered, and the summers apart, he's been by her side every step of the way. Without him she might not have found the man who killed her mother, and definitely not the man who killed Royce.
And without her name falling from his lips yesterday on the beach, she might have pulled the trigger on Royce's killer.
Richard Castle has saved her life.
And she just might be in love with him.
Oh, shit. Love?
She folds the letter and tucks it in her wallet before turning her attention back to the sleeping man beside her. He's turned away, hands clasped on his lap, and she smiles at the slack look on his face and tuft of hair that's fallen over his forehead.
Instead of combing her fingers through his hair she scoots closer, tucks her arm through his, and drops her cheek to his shoulder. They can talk more when they're home. But for now, she closes her eyes, the corners of her lips lifted in a smile.
Yeah, she could get used to this.
He wakes as the plane begins its descent, accepting two hot towels from the flight attendant with a grateful smile. He doesn't need to look to his right to find the source of the tingling sensation down his right arm, but he does anyway, smiles down at Kate, passed out against his shoulder.
He wants to stay like this for hours, dead arm and all, but they've been instructed to put their seats and trays up, so he nudges her.
"Kate." When she doesn't budge, he brushes the hair off her face, strokes his fingers along her jaw. "Kate, we're getting ready to land."
Her eyes open slowly, buries a yawn in the crook of her elbow before glancing at him. "I fell asleep on you," she admits in apology, cheeks flushing.
He grins despite the loss he feels when she shifts back into her seat and buckles herself in. "I wasn't exactly a pillar of conversation myself. Obviously we needed it."
She chuckles. "Yeah."
They're silent until they reach baggage claim, and although he knows what happened in LA was real, being back in their city has the tendrils of doubt curling around his heart. Did she mean what she said, that she wanted him? It's been you, she'd said, but part of him wonders if that was just the fresh breakup and different city talking.
What if she changes her mind?
Oh, God, he wouldn't be able to handle it.
His thoughts are interrupted by the curl of her fingers through his, the hand bracing against his chest as she lifts on her toes to stain a kiss to his mouth.
"I meant what I said yesterday," she says with a smile, squeezing his hand. "You wanna come over tomorrow, and we can talk?"
He lets go of his carry on, barely registers it dropping to the floor as he cups her face and kisses her. It's harder, rougher, and they're both breathing hard when he remembers where they are and pulls away. "Sure," he breathes against her lips. "I'll bring the pizza."
She chuckles and steps away, hand tight in his. "Sounds like a plan."
You put your arms around me and I'm home
A/N: Based off a prompt from Her Eminence, the Prompt Overlord, and my dear friend Lou. Lyrics from Arms by Christina Perri. As always, I am in debt to Callie for improving this.