Carmelita and the Magical Tap Shoes
Once upon a time the Baudelaires and Fiona were taken upon the Carmelita to go to prison. When they came in they were escorted by Count Olaf into the rowing room where Miss Spats was tap-dancing.
"Isn't she gorgeous?" shouted Esme.
"Yeah, whatever," said Olaf.
"C IS FOR CUTE, A IS FOR ADORABLE, R IS FOR RAVASHING, M IS FOR GORGEOUS-"
"Why on Earth are you shouting?" questioned Olaf to Carmelita.
"M can't stand for gorgeous," pointed out Klaus. Carmelita threw a tap shoe at him.
"KLAUS!" screamed Fiona.
"NOODLES!" screamed Esme.
"TAP SHOES!" screamed Carmelita.
"SNAKES!" screamed Uncle Monty, who was dead.
"GRAMMAR!" screamed Aunt Josephine, who was also dead.
"YOU'RE DEAD!" screamed Violet.
"Oh, good," said Olaf, "Then I won't have to kill them again."
"MAGICAL TAP SHOES!" screamed Carmelita.
"Why on Earth are they magical?" asked Fiona, "One of them gave Klaus a bloody nose."
"NOODLES!" screamed Esme and began randomly slapping her noodle everywhere.
"I quit," said one of the snow scouts.
"Could I have some more of that please?" said Olaf, who was wearing an apron.
"Alright, alright," said Fernald walking in the room, "What's wrong with all of you?"
"Klaus and I are the only ones sane," said Fiona.
"POODLES!" screamed Esme and began randomly slapping a poodle everywhere.
"ANIMAL ABUSE!" screamed Violet.
"CUTE, ADORABLE, RAVASHING, GORGEOUS, MAGICAL TAP SHOES!" screamed Carmelita.
"S-u-p-e-r-c-a-l-i-f…." began Olaf.
"What are you spelling?" asked Klaus.
"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!" shouted Olaf.
"I see," said Fernald.
"What do you incline to do about this?" asked Klaus.
"Well, I think we better pause the book right here and take a long break," said Fernald, "We'll come back tomorrow and see if anyone is sane this time besides you guys. You know what, you guys go kiss for a couple of hours and I'll watch this. It's actually quite entertaining."
And they did just that. The next day everyone was a little saner and the book went just fine.