A.N. This assumes that Kelso never found out about Jackie and Hyde.

It's a disease.

It's filthy and it's wrong, and it's so hot that it makes me want to just jump on her and not let her go until I've rid myself of this sickness.

"Picture her in a bikini made of coconuts," Hyde had said. I agreed reluctantly, curious about her appeal to him, who has had more girls than I can even imagine. What about her could suck him in and make him want to stay with her?

Coconuts…

Donna's shampoo smells like coconuts. That always used to turn me on. It's no different now; still makes me hard as a rock.

No different except that now it's not red hair I see when I smell that coconut shampoo. It's dark; black as Darth Vader's Helmet.

I now understand the thrall of the Dark Side.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I walked in on them yesterday night.

She was on top. Hyde had one hand up her shirt. The other was out of my line of vision, somewhere between the side of my couch and Jackie's flushed body. From the way she was heaving and shaking, it didn't take much imagination to figure out what that hand was up to.

I did use my imagination, though. From the time I turned and walked--more like staggered--from the basement up to the bed in my room, I used my imagination. I obsessed about what hot, tanned skin would feel like to my hands. When I did finally did sleep, it was only to dream of slender legs tangled around my torso and pink lips fluttering across my chest.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I've wished I were Hyde before.

He was always the cool one. So tangled up with Zen and issues, the girls panted after him like moths to the flame.

I've longed to be as cool as him, as unconcerned with life as him. To be free of the strings of my family, nobody to answer to but myself.

Oh yeah, I've wanted to be Steven Hyde more times than I can count.

But never like this.

When he is sitting at the Hub with her, an arm draped carelessly across her shoulders, her hand resting indecently high up on his thigh, I'd give all of the action figures in my collection for that to be my arm she's leaning against, for that to be my neck she's nuzzling.

And, most especially, for that to be my thigh she's caressing.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

He doesn't talk about her much, just an occasional comment dropped here and there in passing. Of course he doesn't talk much about anything. Too full of his own King of Zen status to communicate with us peasants.

I asked him once though, near the beginning of this travesty, what she tasted like. I didn't mean to; it just slipped out before I could stop and think it through. Thinking about anything other than brunette hair and high, firm breasts has been a bit of a problem lately.

The question took him by surprise, and, to my disbelief, his eyes clouded over slightly. When he spoke, his voice was slurred. "Strawberries," he said, as if in a trance. "She tastes just like strawberries."

I couldn't understand his drunken response. This was Steven Hyde, after all. He got more action than any of us… well, I got only what Donna was willing to offer, and Fez got nothing, so that wasn't such an amazing achievement. He got more than Kelso, though, and that is some serious lovin'. So I didn't get why this one, tiny girl was turning him into a slobbering beast.

Then the glazed look faded from his eyes, and he frogged me on the shoulder. I didn't mind the blow; I'd deserved it, after all.

Jackie came busting into the basement not long after, eyes alight with joy over some sale at the Mall. She immediately plopped down onto Hyde's lap and kissed him. He kissed back with an intensity that must have surprised her, because her eyes popped open, widened comically, and then fell shut again.

I left after that, and went to the five-and-dime in town.

I bought Donna a tube of strawberry lip-gloss.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Kelso still doesn't know that his ex-girlfriend is messing around with one of his best friends.

I don't see how he can't. I don't see how anyone could miss it lately.

Last Tuesday, Jackie and Hyde apparently took their relationship to the next level. Nobody had to tell me this; the whole basement was shaking for two hours straight.

Two hours. Who the hell can go for two hours?

Since that time, they have been going at it whenever they can, wherever they can. As if they think they're fooling anyone, creeping off to his infuriatingly cool el Camino two or three times a day.

Sometimes even four.

Four times!

As if my ears are sensitive to her, I imagine that I can hear them from my bedroom at night, even though they are two floors below and on the opposite side of the house. Even though Red and Kitty have not said a word, and you can bet that they'd say something if they did hear. I can hear them.

Just banging the hell out of each other.

Sometimes I even imagine that I can hear her crying out her pleasure.

Those are the nights that I close my eyes and listen hard, blocking out Hyde's grunts. My hands move in time to the bedsprings, and I can almost see her sprawled on top of me, mismatched eyes wide. When I'm through, I reach up for a kiss from those pink lips that have always looked so soft and inviting. I can almost taste the strawberries…

But there's nothing. Nothing but me and a lonely, sticky bed.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I was sitting on the sofa when she came through the door, slamming it open and bouncing in as she always does. For a moment I almost fooled myself into thinking she was going to plop down onto my lap and kiss me, as she has done to Hyde so many times.

Like that would ever happen.

Instead, she sat gingerly on the couch and eyed me purposefully.

Finally she spoke. "So, Eric, what's up?"

It took a while for my mind to understand the words because I was so busy enjoying the way those luscious pink lips moved when she talked. When the question finally sunk in, I frantically crossed my legs and grabbed for a cushion from behind her. The brush of her skin against mine only made things worse, and when I spoke it was with an embarrassing squeak and the cushion pressed to my lap. "What do you mean, what's up? Nothings up! Why would I be-- Why would you-- What do you mean, what's up?!"

Her response was to quirk one perfectly formed eyebrow and shoot me a strange look. "I mean what's up, you undernourished freak."

"Nothing. Nothing's up," I said, this time more comfortably. This was good; insults were good. This was familiar ground. I strove for something rude to say, and latched onto the first thing that popped into my mind that didn't involve her naked body.

It took awhile.

"So," I finally go out. "What are you doing here? Your "in" to the group is out."

Oh God, that may be the dumbest thing I've ever said. Right up there with "I love cake."

That thought put me in mind of Donna, and I deflated instantly. God, I'm a bastard.

"I came for you," Jackie said, reaching over to lay a hand on my knee.

Donna who?

"What do you mean," I managed, silently willing that hand to move higher.

"I've been talking to Donna--"

Damn.

"--and I promised I wouldn't say anything to you, but, you know, I lie a lot."

The old Eric would have rolled his eyes and insulted her. This new, sick Eric, was to preoccupied with the way her necklace disappeared down the front of her shirt.

"Anyway," Jackie continued. "She's really worried about you. She says that you've been acting seriously odd for the last few weeks, and she thinks something is wrong with you. I told her that you're just weird, but you know Donna. She's a worrier."

Donna had noticed? Oh God, what else had she noticed?

"Eric? Are you even listening to me, you jerk?!"

For the first time in two weeks and three days, I paid her no attention. God, for once I was too busy thinking about Donna to pay attention to Jackie. That's a switch.

My attention was drawn back at Jackie when she grabbed the cushion from my lap and flung it at my head. Luckily, all this talk about Donna had me cooled down. Yet another switch.

"Listen, you tiny little dork, Donna is sick of your crap! Unless you want her back in California, you better start acting normal!" She stomped out the door, only pausing to add, almost as an afterthought, "Well… as normal as you get, anyway."

And then she was gone.

I didn't even watch her ass as she left.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Jackie and Hyde are in the basement again, acting on their dirty urges.

Instead of listening, I cover my ears. I think of Donna, and all the times we've made those noises.

Well, not quite those noises. Jackie is a screamer. Hyde's never been one to talk in bed, but Jackie seems to have converted him.

Then, I remember when we hadn't made those noises. I think of when she was in California, and I had never felt so alone in my life. I think of our break-up over the promise ring, and the first time that I saw her with Casey Kelso.

She had lusted after Casey. I don't like to think about it, but I know she did. I saw it in the way she looked at him. Was that the way that I looked at Jackie? With that mindless, heartless desire fogging my eyes?

Hyde's face drifted into my thoughts: that time that he had said she tasted like strawberries, his eyes all glassy and his voice faraway. It nearly made me gag, but I thought about the way he called out her name when he was making love to her.

And then I thought of Jackie, gazing up at Hyde with those wide eyes full of adoration. Leaning into his kisses with an abandon that I'd never once seen her show with Kelso.

And it was so clear now, where for weeks it had been murky and confusing. As if a veil had been lifted.

I jumped from bed and threw on my pajamas.

It's been way too long since Donna and I have had a sleepover.