I was watching re-runs when this came to me, so I hope you guys like it. Also I'd like to point out that this is my first FF for SVU, so tell me if you guys like it and want for me to continue. I might be posting daily - only because there's only one chapter left to finish and I'm almost done - and there's a total of 5 to - maybe - 6 chapters that I plan to post. To those who are reading my Jori story, don't worry, I plan to update soon, promise! And lastly, please, please, please, please review, I love hearing back from people:)

Disclaimer: I don't anything, but all of my mistakes and the plot idea, that all, I swear! *slowly raises arms in surrender*

Regret
Chapter 1 - The Confession

Amanda's knuckles connected to the hard wood of the door; she was shaky, her heart was beating a hundred beats a minutes, she felt fever-ish and her palms were clammy. All she hoped was that her courage was still with her because the door was opening and she needed to start talking...now.

"I don't really know where to start. You make me want to pull my hair off, you make me want to scream in frustration, you make me smile, you make me want to hug you and dream about you everyday of every second. It's driving me crazy, that I can't do any of that, that I have to sit around and watch you leave with other people, that I can't do anything to stop it! You are the one I want and I can't have you because there's no way that you'd go for a girl like me. I try and I try to get your attention, every day trying something new to grab your attention, but every time it fails and I watch you leave with someone who isn't me, and that frustrates me." Amanda said as she breathed in a big breath as she finished her rambling. She stared at big, wide, chocolate eyes as they stared back at her with surprise. She felt like her heart was going to explode from her chest and she was tempted to put a hand on her chest as if to stop it from actually popping out, but she held back, staring at those eyes. She knew this was a bad idea, but she couldn't take it anymore, she couldn't take the heartbreak any longer, and she had decided that she had to do it now, or she might never said anything, but now she was regretting the surge of confidence that she had a few minutes ago. All adrenaline was leaving her body, and she felt her body begin to shake when she really became aware of what she had just done.
She stared at the woman who held her heart, the one that was capable of turning her life into a nightmare or the happiest life she could ever hope for. his was the woman who had the power to make her life hell and she didn't like the feeling. She liked being in charge, she liked being in control, and now, that wasn't the case; her control was given to this woman and that terrified her because she couldn't decide for herself, she couldn't make sure that everything turned out the way that she wanted it to.

"So this is me, asking - pleading - you to please give me a chance, because I can make you happy, I can try my hardest to make sure you are treated right and happy, not like all those other losers that you've dated," Amanda said, not liking the silence and the tension that seemed to hang around them. Her hands shook nervously as she looked back to the other woman; she watched as the other woman blinked a couple of times, trying to rid herself of the surprise, she watched as the gaping mouth opened and closed repeatedly.

"I-I don't know what to say," started the other woman, but stopped, she herself not really knowing what to say. Here stood the woman that she had wanted for so long, confessing to feelings she thought were one-sided, and she couldn't say anything because she didn't know how to. How could she explain that this wasn't the best time to come talk to her, that someone was over, that one of those losers was seated in her living room because she didn't have the guts to express herself the right way, and had decided to leave the situation to itself? S he had decided a long time ago that she wasn't going to do anything for so many reason, she believed it would never work out, that Amanda was straight, that feelings were never reciprocated, but now, here she stood, speaking her heart out and she was rendered silent.

"Olivia, babe, what is taking so long?" Asked the man from behind her, and she knew, she just knew, that her chance to respond had just gone out the window. She looked back to stare at Cassidy, not liking the way that he looked in her apartment, not liking the way that he ha probably just ruined everything for her, but she knew it wasn't his fault, it was her own and she was starting to regret herself for it. She turned back to stare back at the other woman, but gasped when she saw a tear roll down the blonde woman's cheek; she knew where this was going, and she didn't want this to end this way, it couldn't all she wanted was her and now she knew that things weren't going to end the way she wanted it too.

"Aman-" She started, but she was interrupted by the breaking voice of the blonde.

"I knew this was a bad idea," Amanda shook her head and started to take steps back, "I should go, I-I'll-" Amanda just shook her head and took a few steps back before she broke out into a run.

"Amanda!" Cried out Olivia, she looked to see the back of the blonde's figure. She leaned her head against the door frame and wiped at a tear that slipped down her cheek. She should follow, she should go after her, but something was stopping her. She took a step back and closed the door and headed back to where Cassidy was, but all she was feeling was the feeling of regret and she knew exactly why she felt that way.

Thanks for reading and please review:)

-Buddy2197