Disclaimer: i dont own the song or the characters so dont sue me!
And everyone should get along..
Okay children quiet down, quiet down
Children I'd like to introduce our new substitute teacher for the day
His name is Professor Snape
Children quiet down please
Semus don't throw that (SHUT UP!)
Professor Snape will be your new substitute
while Professor Lupin is out with pneumonia (HE'S A WEREWOLF!)
Good luck Professor Snape
[Snape]
Hi there little boys and girls (F**K YOU!)
Today we're gonna to learn how to poison Harry Potter
But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Lucius (Huh?)
Say hi Lucius! ("Hi Lucius")Lucius 30 and still lives with his mom
and he don't got a job, cause Lucius sits at home and smokes pot
but his twelve-year old son looks up to him an awful lot
And Lucius likes to hang out at the local 3 broomsticks spot
and wait in the parkin lot for Madam Rosmerta off the clock
when it's late and the lot gets dark and fake like he walks his dog
Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks (AHH!)
And even if they escaped and they got the cops
the ladies would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge
'til one night Professor Mcgonagall went off the job
when she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk
But Minerva knew it was Lucius and said knock it off
But Lucius wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his broomstick
Crazier than Severus Snape is off the vodka
You couldn't even take him to Dumbledore's to get Lucius a "Dr."
He grabbed Minerva' by the legs as chopped it off her
and dropped her off in the lake for the what d'you call em?"please-men" to find her
But ever since the day Minerva went off to wander
they never found her, and Lucius still hangs at the Three Broomsticks
And that's the story of Lucius and his marijuana,
and what it might do to you
So see if Harry Potter wants any - it's bad for you
Chorus: Prof. Flitwick
see children, drugs are bahhhd (c'mon)
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (ask him man)
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (that's right)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)
So kids say no to drugs (that's right)
So you don't act like everyone else does (uh-huh)
Then there's really nothin else to say (sing along)
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Snape]
My Cauldron is the size of a peanut, have you seen it?
Hell NO you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut (Huh?)
Speakin of peanuts, you know what else is bad for Harry Potter?
Veriteserum(sp?)is the worst potion in the world
If someone ever offers it to you, don't do it
Kids two hits'll probably drain secrets
and secrets are final, you won't get them back
So don't get attached, it'll attack secret in your soul
Meet Ron, 12 years old
After hangin out with some friends at a quidditch party, he gets bold
and decides to try it, when he's bribed by five guys
and peer pressure will win every time you try to fight it
Suddenly, he starts to convulse and his mouth moves into hyperdrive
and his eyes roll back in his skull {*I'm in love with hermione*}
His back starts tah - look like the McDonald's Arches
He's on Deans carpet, layin horizontal screamin {*I love you draco*}
And everyone in the common room starts laughin at him
"Hey Parvati, Ron is a jackass, look at him!"
cause they took it too, so they think it's funny
So they're laughing at basically nothing except maybe wasting his money
Meanwhile, Ron's in St Mungo's, the action is over
and He's telling his secrets for the longbottoms to hear
And that's the story of Ron, the Veritaserum maniac
So feed that to Harry Potter class, cause it's bad for you
Chorus: Prof. Flitwick
See children, potions are bahhhd (that's right)
and if you don't believe me, ask Fred (that's right)
and if you don't believe him, ask Lavender (you can)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)
So kids say no to potions (even snapes)
So you don't act like everyone else does (that's right)
And there's really nothin else to say (but umm)
Potions are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Snape]
And last but not least, one of the most humungous
problems among young people today, is Canary Creams
It cam from the weasley twins, they pick it up,curse it ,
bag it up, and you put it right in your mouth and chew it
Yum yum! Then you start to see some dumb stuff
And you get feathers when eat um..
And sometimes you see things that aren't there (Like what?)
Like Professor Moody in a G-string with orange hair
(Prof. Snape what's a G-string?) It's yarn Cho
Moody sticks 'em up his behind, goes out and wears 'em (Huh?)
And if you swallow too much of the ton tongue toffees
Whoops, did I say ton tongue toffees ? I meant canary creams
Ya tongue gets, all swoll up like a cow's tongue (How come?)
cause it comes from a weasley (Gross!!)
See kids,Weasleys are bad, it's a common fact
But your mom and dad, know that's all that I'm good at (Oh!)
But don't be me, cause if you grow up and you go and O.D.
They're gonna come for me and I'ma have to be sirius balck
and get a disguise and hide, cause it'll be my fault
So don't do potions, and do exactly as I don't,
cause I'm bad for you
Chorus: Prof Flitwick
See children, potions are bahhhd (uh-huh)
and if you don't believe me, ask fred (put that down)
and if you don't believe him, ask cho (you can ask)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (and she will)
So kids say no to hagrid (say no)
So you don't act like everyone else does (like I do)
And there's really nothin else to say (that's right)
Potions are just bad, mmm'kay?
And everyone should get along..
Okay children quiet down, quiet down
Children I'd like to introduce our new substitute teacher for the day
His name is Professor Snape
Children quiet down please
Semus don't throw that (SHUT UP!)
Professor Snape will be your new substitute
while Professor Lupin is out with pneumonia (HE'S A WEREWOLF!)
Good luck Professor Snape
[Snape]
Hi there little boys and girls (F**K YOU!)
Today we're gonna to learn how to poison Harry Potter
But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Lucius (Huh?)
Say hi Lucius! ("Hi Lucius")Lucius 30 and still lives with his mom
and he don't got a job, cause Lucius sits at home and smokes pot
but his twelve-year old son looks up to him an awful lot
And Lucius likes to hang out at the local 3 broomsticks spot
and wait in the parkin lot for Madam Rosmerta off the clock
when it's late and the lot gets dark and fake like he walks his dog
Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks (AHH!)
And even if they escaped and they got the cops
the ladies would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge
'til one night Professor Mcgonagall went off the job
when she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk
But Minerva knew it was Lucius and said knock it off
But Lucius wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his broomstick
Crazier than Severus Snape is off the vodka
You couldn't even take him to Dumbledore's to get Lucius a "Dr."
He grabbed Minerva' by the legs as chopped it off her
and dropped her off in the lake for the what d'you call em?"please-men" to find her
But ever since the day Minerva went off to wander
they never found her, and Lucius still hangs at the Three Broomsticks
And that's the story of Lucius and his marijuana,
and what it might do to you
So see if Harry Potter wants any - it's bad for you
Chorus: Prof. Flitwick
see children, drugs are bahhhd (c'mon)
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (ask him man)
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (that's right)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)
So kids say no to drugs (that's right)
So you don't act like everyone else does (uh-huh)
Then there's really nothin else to say (sing along)
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Snape]
My Cauldron is the size of a peanut, have you seen it?
Hell NO you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut (Huh?)
Speakin of peanuts, you know what else is bad for Harry Potter?
Veriteserum(sp?)is the worst potion in the world
If someone ever offers it to you, don't do it
Kids two hits'll probably drain secrets
and secrets are final, you won't get them back
So don't get attached, it'll attack secret in your soul
Meet Ron, 12 years old
After hangin out with some friends at a quidditch party, he gets bold
and decides to try it, when he's bribed by five guys
and peer pressure will win every time you try to fight it
Suddenly, he starts to convulse and his mouth moves into hyperdrive
and his eyes roll back in his skull {*I'm in love with hermione*}
His back starts tah - look like the McDonald's Arches
He's on Deans carpet, layin horizontal screamin {*I love you draco*}
And everyone in the common room starts laughin at him
"Hey Parvati, Ron is a jackass, look at him!"
cause they took it too, so they think it's funny
So they're laughing at basically nothing except maybe wasting his money
Meanwhile, Ron's in St Mungo's, the action is over
and He's telling his secrets for the longbottoms to hear
And that's the story of Ron, the Veritaserum maniac
So feed that to Harry Potter class, cause it's bad for you
Chorus: Prof. Flitwick
See children, potions are bahhhd (that's right)
and if you don't believe me, ask Fred (that's right)
and if you don't believe him, ask Lavender (you can)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)
So kids say no to potions (even snapes)
So you don't act like everyone else does (that's right)
And there's really nothin else to say (but umm)
Potions are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Snape]
And last but not least, one of the most humungous
problems among young people today, is Canary Creams
It cam from the weasley twins, they pick it up,curse it ,
bag it up, and you put it right in your mouth and chew it
Yum yum! Then you start to see some dumb stuff
And you get feathers when eat um..
And sometimes you see things that aren't there (Like what?)
Like Professor Moody in a G-string with orange hair
(Prof. Snape what's a G-string?) It's yarn Cho
Moody sticks 'em up his behind, goes out and wears 'em (Huh?)
And if you swallow too much of the ton tongue toffees
Whoops, did I say ton tongue toffees ? I meant canary creams
Ya tongue gets, all swoll up like a cow's tongue (How come?)
cause it comes from a weasley (Gross!!)
See kids,Weasleys are bad, it's a common fact
But your mom and dad, know that's all that I'm good at (Oh!)
But don't be me, cause if you grow up and you go and O.D.
They're gonna come for me and I'ma have to be sirius balck
and get a disguise and hide, cause it'll be my fault
So don't do potions, and do exactly as I don't,
cause I'm bad for you
Chorus: Prof Flitwick
See children, potions are bahhhd (uh-huh)
and if you don't believe me, ask fred (put that down)
and if you don't believe him, ask cho (you can ask)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (and she will)
So kids say no to hagrid (say no)
So you don't act like everyone else does (like I do)
And there's really nothin else to say (that's right)
Potions are just bad, mmm'kay?