I'm Sorry

Authors Note: Wow, I guess I'd like to start out by saying this is out of character for me; I don't usually get this angsty. Still I hope you guys like it. I'm hoping to do another Kendall/Logan oneshot on a happier note. Anyway, please review and let me know what you think!

As Logan walked swiftly down the hall he attempted to not think about what had just happened. Instead he was trying to concentrate on keeping himself together as he walked toward a room that he had never been inside, and yet had known the location of within a week of arriving at the Palm Woods.

It seemed to Logan that luck had not been on his side tonight being as what had happened accompanied by the fact that flashbacks of the event kept floating through his head.

"Logan, we need to talk."

He finally reached his destination in what seemed like hours to him, but in reality was only a few minutes.

When he reached the door he knocked trying to stay calm. His knocks sounded like pounds and although in the back of his mind Logan knew that he couldn't find it in himself to care.

"Why? Kendall, what's going on?"

A tired looking Camille opened the door, but upon seeing Logan she seemed to perk right up. Logan didn't notice.

"Logan, what are you doing here so late?" If she hadn't been talking so fast she wouldn't have finished her sentence; for within moments of seeing her Logan had crushed his lips onto hers.

"This isn't working."

Logan broke off the kiss for air.

"Logan I-" He cut her off with another kiss, this one more heated than the last as he pushed her into the apartment.

"W-What?"

Within seconds Logan had locked the door behind them and had Camille firmly pressed against it as he continued to kiss her.

"Look, this relationship stood a chance of a million to one before we got to LA and now that we're here it's just not working… It can't work."

Logan moved his lips to kiss at Camille's neck.

"Oh Logan! You have no idea how long I've waited for this!" Logan barely heard a word. If asked he wouldn't be able to repeat what she had just said to him.

"No. You're the one who's been saying anything is possible. This can work, it's been working."

He couldn't keep the conversation out of his head. No matter what he did, no matter how passionately he kissed her, he couldn't stop reliving the nightmare.

"No, it hasn't. Logan, this was hard enough at home. It was hard enough sneaking around there. God, kissing in the janitors closet, sneaking in through your window at night, lying to our parents; it was hard. And now we're in LA and soon people are going to be watching us. We can't keep faking; we need to end this."

He moved back up to her lips and pulled her deeper into the apartment.

"You told me to come to LA! You told me everything would work out! You said as long as we stayed together we'd be fine! And now you're saying that because we're here it can't work?!"

He pushed her onto the green couch that sat in the middle of the room. He could tell she was trying to say something, but he couldn't hear, couldn't concentrate; all he could do was relive the moment where his heart was smashed into one million tiny shards.

"I didn't know it would be like this! I didn't know it'd be so hard to sneak around! A-And I just can't do it anymore! I can't keep lying and being fake with everyone! You know that's not me Logan." He said getting soft at the end and reaching in to put a hand on Logan's face.

He wasn't conscious of what he was doing as he started to lift up her shirt.

"Fake? Being with me is fake?" Logan said in a deep voice as he pushed away Kendall's hand. "What's fake about all of this is that we're hiding it! Do you think if we break up that things will go back to how they used to be?"

He kissed her harder as the memories became more painful.

"We both liked girls before this. We can go back to that!"

For a second it registered that his lips were bruising; for a second he cared.

"Or we could come out of the closet!"

He moved his head to kiss along her jaw.

"We can't come out! If we do we ruin the band. This isn't just about you, it's about our friends."

He was kissing rougher by the second. Suddenly his occasional nip at her neck became a bite. His hands were pressed against her arms.

"It's about us! It's about you and me and our relationship! I love you Kendall! I love you so much it hurts! Doesn't that mean anything?!"

"Logan!"

"I don't know anymore." He said looking at the floor.

"Please Logan!"

"How can you say that? How can you say that when you love me?"

"Logan you're hurting me!"

"I couldn't."

"Logan! Logan!"

"W-What? I don't understand."

He could feel the water coating his eyes, but he couldn't tell why it was there.

"Yes you do. You always do."

"Please stop Logan, please!"

"But- I gave you everything. I told you everything. I hid things, I took risks, I went out of my comfort zone. I-I gave you my-"

"Logan!"

"Stop it! I know and I'm sorry! I wouldn't have put you through all of this if I had known it would end this way! You're my best friend Logan; I never wanted to hurt you. I-I… I'm sorry, Logan. I'm sorry." Kendall said not even attempting to hide his tears. And then Logan left.

"LOGAN!"

Things suddenly flew back into focus around Logan and his hearing was turned back on. He was quick to move away from a crying Camille.

The girl's arms were turning purple from where Logan's grip had been and her neck looked as though someone had been trying to bite chunks out of it.

Logan saw the damage and heard her sobs, but he didn't apologize, not because he didn't care, not because he didn't see what he had done, but because he was crying too hard to speak.

He hadn't cried in front of Kendall, but now it seemed he couldn't stop himself.

"I'm so sorry." Kendall said as Logan slammed the door. "I lied."