Yaw: "To deviate from an intended course."
A quick and dirty response to "Significant Others."
#*#*#*#
She hasn't even asked.
In that horrible, mind-numbing moment, with Castle blathering on about S'morelets in the background, Kate has the deafening realization that she hasn't even asked him.
She's self-centered, but she's always thought that that part of her was tempered by self-awareness. But standing here in Castle's living room, suitcase in hand because she just can't bring herself to actually leave enough stuff at his place to live off of for three days, she sees that she's just selfish sometimes when it comes to him.
Even Meredith, whom she has always considered to be the epitome of the flighty, useless, conceited female, had asked him.
And where does that put her? Where does that land Kate in the wasteland of Castle's exes, exactly? At this moment, she thinks maybe last.
He does know if not everything, then a significant chunk of it, about her family, her neuroses, the darkness of her soul. He has seen her, and probably mentally catalogued her, at her worst.
And she knows nothing about his.
But it's not entirely his fault, as his ex-wife suggests, because at least she had asked.
That crazy, insane, commitment-phobe actress of an ex-wife had asked him about his father.
And she, Kate Beckett, homicide detective, inquisitor extraordinaire, has not.
So how can she condemn him? How can she be upset at his lack of candor?
The answer that she sits down with at his kitchen counter: she cannot.
And so, perhaps, her New Year's resolution has changed. Well, shifted, at least.
Whereas the Kate Beckett who closed 2012 by prying herself forcibly from her grief over her mother, or from her manufactured, shallow distraction from that messy tangle of memories and emotion, thought her only goal in 2013 was to reveal something from her own tortured soul, to enlighten him as to the mystery of her heart, this Kate, the one who stuck around when first his daughter and then his ex-wife invaded their happy little escapist bubble, knows it is time to start doing the asking.
#*#*#*#
I got all riled up at the end of this one. Give me feedback to make me quit pounding on my mental walls. And to vote on further chapters.
No beta-mistakes are my own.
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