Summary: Felicity's thoughts and reactions to the "I love you" in the mansion during season 2 finale. Written in the first person.

Disclaimer: All recognizable characters owned by CW, etc. No copyright infringement intended

We were standing on the beach of Lian Vu, with the sun bouncing off of the ocean like thousands of sparkly diamonds. The sky was my favorite shade of blue (That shade of blue? Also the color of Oliver's eyes, coincidentally). Like I told my two friends, the island could be very beautiful. If you did not think about the few stories Oliver had told us over the past year.

Diggle made me discuss my feelings regarding that scene at the mansion last night. Well, 'made me' is up for interpretation. It basically comes down to the fact of him asking me, and me telling him. No thumbscrews were involved. Anyhow, he suggested that at some point, I ask Oliver to clarify his feelings about that statement. Yeah, that statement. Digg thinks that Oliver meant it when he told me he loved me. Me? Not so sure. I mean, it was all meant to be part of the plan to misled Slade into thinking I was the most important woman in Oliver's life. Thinking that Oliver could really care about me that way? Unthinkable.

So here we are, standing at the water's edge, like some kind of lovelorn couple in a bad rom-com movie, and I had to work up the courage to ask him. And me, in my typical nerdy fashion, stumbled over my words. Like always.

"When you told me you loved me, you even…had me fooled. " Pause. "For a second. I thought maybe you might have meant it. What you said." Another awkward pause. "You…you really sold it."

Oliver stood there looking at me with that blank look on his face he gets when he does not know whether to lie or say nothing.

After I finished stumbling over my words, Oliver finally responded. "We both did." He smiled that thin-lipped smile he gives when he is attempting to hide his true feelings.

No confession of love. No denial. No analysis of what had happened. Just a short sentence, a nod, a look. That was it. Which is his usual go-to behavior when he is uncomfortable.

When I had started this conversation, what did I want to find out? Had I really, really wanted to know? I guess not; otherwise I would have pushed the issue. Why I let Oliver go without saying what he was thinking, with no apology for doing what he did, or how he did it, or if he really had meant it. I let him get away with his typical Oliver behavior when he does not want to lie or tell the truth. I let him keep quiet, listening intently, and finally, grudgingly, grunts something at the end.

Looking into those blue eyes, feeling like they could still reach to the bottom of my soul, I just could not do it. I just could not press the issue, and change what we had. Oliver will do that when he is ready. He is obviously not ready at this time. For whatever reason, and knowing him, I think I know the reason, he just cannot allow himself to be truly happy with someone he really deserves.

He probably is still under that stupid illusion that he is not worthy of love, like he had told me following the 'Russia incident'. That he is too broken, too dark, to be in a truly loving relationship. A relationship that goes the distance.

He will, someday, and when that happens, I will still be there. I have total and complete faith that it will happen. That we will happen.

AN: Thank you for reading. If you like, please pretty please leave a review!