Drinks

2 Broke Girls & Rules of Engagement

"Hey, Tim, I met these girls downstairs and they're coming over for drinks."

"Was it the two girls trying to start a cupcake business?"

"Um…yeah…" Russell stuttered. "Why?"

"Ugh, I had an encounter with Miss Black the first time their shop had opened."

Flashback

Timmy entered Max's Homemade Cupcakes and sniffed the air. Max popped up from behind the counter. "Hi! Can I help you?"

"Hi, would you happen to sell any chocolate fudge cupcakes, would you?"

"Sure. You look like a business man, so why the hell are you in a cupcake shop?"

"Oh, the cupcake's not for me, it's for my boss. I'm Timmy Patel."

"Max Black. Hey, what does this face say to you?" She asked, doing her 'suck it' face.

"I think maybe, 'I told you so' or 'you can suck it'."

"Yes, thank god, somebody got it right!" Max smiled relieved. Timmy smiled at her as she handed him the cupcake. "So, who's your boss and where do you work?"

"Oh, my boss? Russell Dunbar. I work at Dunbar Industries."

"Isn't that like a-,"

"Nuthouse? Yes. Place of business? No, not really." Timmy laughed.

"Oh, okay." Timmy paid her and turned around to leave.

"You know, maybe I'll stop by sometime."

"Be careful. My boss is a sleaze. All he'll do is stare at your breasts."

"Goodbye, Timmy."

"Goodbye, Miss Black."

"And now they're here." Timmy sighed.

"You can come too." Russell groaned.

"Really sir? You're not going to pull anything?"

"Nothing. I swear. Now let's go get as drunk as a skunk."

…

That evening, Caroline and Max sat on the couch in Russell's apartment. Russell sat drinking out of a flask, while Caroline sat drinking a glass of wine. Max was drinking out of a flask like Russell, and Timmy was already madly laughing, drunk over some strong vodka.

"Hey, do you know what's a really funny word? ZOOM! *Laughing* ZOOM! *Laughing* *Hic*"

"Timmy, you okay?" Russell asked, a little concerned and frightened.

"Why wouldn't I be okay? Shouldn't I be okay? Am I dead? I mean—Holy shit it's a peacock." Timmy slurred, crashing unconscious.

"Okay, that was…completely insane, who's up for Twister?"

Two Minutes Later…

Caroline, Max and Russell were tangled in a mess on the twister board.

"Russell, left hand yellow." Caroline called.

"It's already on yellow!"

"Oh, sorry, right hand." Caroline smiled sheepishly. Russell than moved his hand over to yellow.

"Okay, Max, right hand red." As max flipped over, she found herself on top of Russell.

"Hello."

"Piss off Russell."

"I was talking to your boobs." At that moment, Russell collapsed beneath her.

"Game over." Caroline smiled. A moan came from Timmy and all three looked at him.

"Let's go tease him, c'mon!" Max chuckled. Russell got to his feet and he, Caroline and Max went over to tease him.

"Timmy, sweetie, how many times have I told you not to wear your glasses in bed?" Russell asked in a girl voice.

"Yeah, Timmy! Why are you so stupid Timmy? Take your glasses off Timmy!" Caroline screeched. All three struggled to contain their laughter as Timmy squirmed in his sleep.

…

The next day, after the girls had supposedly left, Timmy groaned. Russell looked up from where he was making coffee. "Ugh…My head…"

"Hey Timmy."

"Mr Dunbar, why am I still here? Where are Miss Black and Miss Channing?"

"Uh, they left. Twelve hours ago."

"We didn't get smashed, did we?"

"YOU did, I didn't." Russell chuckled. Timmy picked his glasses off the floor and ran a hand through his hair.

"You didn't sleep with any of them, did you?" Russell made a face and devilishly replied,

"Maybe."

"—Russell, why the hell do you have a-Timmy." At the sight of Max in her nightie, Timmy shot daggers towards Russell, who stood smiling.

"Oopsie." He squeaked, putting a finger to the side of his mouth.

…

That afternoon, Russell and Timmy walked down the street, Russell's hands in his pockets, while Timmy's phone rang.

"You wanna answer that?" Russell asked, a smirk developing on his face.

"No…No I don't." Timmy choked, and they walked on.