Disclaimer: I own nothing but ideas and Amari. The song On My Own belongs to Three Days Grace.
I walk alone.
Think of home.
Memories of long ago.
No one knows I lost,
my soul long ago…
Amari watched as the goblin army she commanded slaughtered more rebellious demons. She had increased in status over the last seven years she had been with her Master. Death was an everyday fact for her. She wasn't afraid of it anymore. She watched as a dying demon made its way to her feet, bleeding to death.
"You…you're a traitor. We are one in the same. How...how co-could you do this?".
Amari looked at it with disgust and pulled her foot, now a large white paw, away from it and dug her fangs deep into it's neck, bursting several blood vessels. The goblins watched her with both fear and admiration etched into their features. This amazing being was their leader in war, their king's Hellhound. Amari howled in victory, which her master heard and acknowledged.
You're getting stronger, Amari, just as I promised.
"Do you wish for me to report back?"
You're in no rush, do what you have to do.
Lied too much!
She said that she's had enough!
Am I too much?
She said that she's had enough!
"I'll lead them back, my lord" Amari replied, but received none.
She looked to the goblins, who all assembled under her command. "Report back to Lapland, the Master is waiting for us".
"All hail the Hellhound!"
"Gods bless thee, Amari Fenrirsulfur!"
"Great daughter of Fenrir!"
Amari smiled. She liked the last name best. It was safe to say she was his daughter, the daughter of the most powerful wolf in all history. But the one who was bound in chains until the end of the world. Cursed by man, loved by wolves and wolf demons all over.
"Just like me" she thought.
Standing on my own!
Remembering the one I left at home!
Forget about the life I used to know!
Forget about the one I left at home!
The goblins marched on back to Lapland, Amari leading the way. No one dared to bother her. She was in deep thought, thinking of the way her life was before she met the Master and came to Lapland.
Her mother…Larissa had been her name…she was also pearly white, just like her. Amari never knew her father. All she knew was that he was a human researching wolves in the North. He had met her mother like that, in her human form. They fell in love and had her, but never did he know about Larissa's true self. Her wolf demon self. If things didn't change so drastically, she would've been happy forever. But of course, things never worked that way.
I need to run far away.
Can't go back to that place.
Like she told me I'm
just a big disgrace.
Her aunt coveted the title of alpha female and went to great lengths to get there. Amari closed her eyes and saw multiple things.
A large paw on her mother's neck, choking her to death, cutting off her air...blood all over the den walls…the sound and scent of death all over…And a child screaming "Please no more!"
Amari opened her eyes again. No…those things were best left in the past. No point in bringing them back. They were all dead, whether she liked it or not. She had to live with the fact that she killed them all, but that wasn't the hardest part.
Lied too much!
She said that she's had enough!
Am I too much?
She said that she's had enough!
The faces…she could still see the faces of the ones she killed even now, fourteen years later to her, but was only two years ago to the goblins and her Master. She remembered when her aunt exiled her. She had only been six months old, and was already forced to live on her own. She lived off of old kills and carcasses. That was how she met the Master. She was a year old by then and had a terrible fear of reindeer, she still did now.
The goblins had caught her picking at the dead body of a reindeer and captured her. They took her to their king, who wasn't sure whether or not to believe her pleas of innocence. Only when she was thrown into the prison and showed him she was half human, only then was the bargain made. She hadn't reflected much since. There was no point in it. But still…it lingered on in her dreams and in her conscience. She never wanted to kill another wolf demon again.
Standing on my own!
Remembering the one I left at home.
Forget about the life I used to know!
Forget about the one I left at home!
And what surprised her was that he didn't make her. She would never do it again, not for anything. The nightmares of the past plagued her here in the present, leaving her whimpering, crying, and even howling at night. She often went to Amun for comfort, but he wasn't there a lot of the time, and she didn't wish to look foolish in front of her master again. Never again would she cry in front of him. If only he knew how much she cried when she was alone…
Nothing could change what she did. Nothing could take it away. Nothing could be said or done to change it. Blood stained her fangs, claws, soul, and heart. Well, maybe not her soul. She sold that for this a long time ago.
So now I'm standing here alone.
I'm learning how to live life on my own.
She learned several new things when under the servitude of her Master. She changed much over the years. Almost too much. When Amari looked in the mirror, she didn't see a strong, stoic daughter of Fenrir. No, what she did see was a girl aging long before her time. Slowly but surely, she was becoming battle weary.
Lied too much!
I think that I've had enough!
Am I too much?
She said that she's had enough!
The wolf demon led them back to Lapland, trying not to dwell on such unimportant matters. But they kept coming back to her. As they came to the palace of her Master, Amari was quick to banish her thoughts and keep her mind clear. He could read her mind like it was an open book. As they approached the lord of Lapland, Amari went to the ground on her knees and then changed to her wolf form, where she kept herself low to the ground.
"The demons have been destroyed, my Lord".
"Rise, Amari" he commanded.
She did as she was told and awaited her next order.
"Come with me, let us be warded from listeners".
Amari nodded and followed outside to the balcony.
I'm standing on my own!
Remembering the one I left at home!
"What's wrong, Master? Have I done something wrong?" she asked.
"No. Amari, I've been looking into your mind. I know all about your family now, and every aspect of what they did to you. Your father, it just so happens, is still alive. Amari, if you wish to find him, then I won't stop you".
"Master, are you offering me freedom?"
"If you choose to find him, and if you do, then yes, I am. You could have everything you were meant to have back. You'll have a family, Amari".
Forget about the life I used to know!
Forget about the one I left at home!
So now I'm standing here alone!
I'm learning how to live life on my own!
Amari had never really thought about leaving her master. She flattened her ears against her head at the thought. Why would he want her to leave? Was it what he wanted?
"Do you want me to leave, my Lord?" she asked.
"It's not my choice, it's yours".
"But-"
"Amari, no more of this until you make your choice. Your life is now in your hands".
He started to walk away, but Amari had put her head up to his hand so that he was gently petting her head. The simple, but loving gesture reassured her. No, she wouldn't be leaving, not now, not ever.
Forget about the past I'll never know.
Forget about the one I left at home!
"I have no desire to leave you, my Lord".
"He's your father".
"But he was never there for me. My Lord, of all the humans and other being I have ever met, you are the only one who's really mattered. Of all the would've been and could've been fathers, you are the only one who's ever pulled through for me. I can't believe I'm about to say this, but I truly do love you as a paternal figure".
He didn't respond, not right away. He seemed almost unsure of what to say or do. He hadn't shown her any real kind of affection as of late, just regular pats on the head and back strokes.
"You really are loyal to me, aren't you" he got down to her height and stroked her neck, "Amari Fenrirsulfur?"
"Would you want it any other way, my lord?"
He embraced her. "Never. You would throw away your freedom to stay with me. If that's not loyalty, then I don't know what it is. You don't have to stand on your own anymore, Amari. The past is over now, and it's about time you left the past in the past".
"I'll be sure to, my lord".
They remained united still. He never abandoned her. She could never find it in her to leave him. They were still Master and Hound and that was how it was always going to be.
A/N: Yeah, kinda mushy toward the end, but hey, I try to give some characters that look harsh a benefit of the doubt. I'm not sure what I'm gonna do with next one, or if I'll make one. This might just wind up being the last. See ya soon!
