Disclaimer: I don't own HP or any of that jazz…in any part of this story….

A/n: This story was a spur of the moment decision that came to me when I was going to Wal-mart with my roommate. I came back and decided to write it. I'm posting it without any corrections or anything…only b/c its final week but sometimes, u gotta do what u gotta do. I have no clue how this will turn out but lets give it a go…OH yeah, its based of the beloved Celione Dion song, "It's all coming back to me now," I just shortened the title a bit.

The wind is cold tonight. My body froze in bed as I listened to it right outside the window. I don't know why, but there was always something that made me wish I had what I didn't anymore. But I've had a good life; he has given that to me. He was, by no means you when he took my broken heart up in his hands and he has never tried to be you, which is something that means the world to me. I lay here beside him in this bed and write in this journal and think of how grateful I am to him. Because I am grateful, so grateful. But as deep as this gratitude runs, that's all it is. I try, I have tried for years, to love him the way I loved you but I can't. He's not you. He'll never be you.

I remember the night it ended, the night you left. How I cried over you! I barely had a reason to live at all. The night made me long for you and the days, the sun was so cruel, taunting me with it's light, a light I had lost. In the sun, all the tears I cried turned to dust
and I just knew my eyes were drying up forever. I knew that eventually I'd have to stop crying over you. And I did. I did that because of him—because he saved me and loved me. I can't remember where or when or how I finally thought that I could be with him, but there I was, with him.

When I married him, I banished every memory you and I had ever made. I wasn't going to let it affect my life with him. For three years I've lived without you, lived happily. And then…there you were, with Harry like nothing had happened. And I saw you, and you smiled and talked like nothing had happened. But it did happen and now, now those memories are back in my head again. They're in my heart again. And here I am again, obsessed with the thought of your touch.Damn you Ronald Weasley! Damn you and curse you for ever thinking you could just walk back into my life like this and it not affect me. Curse me, for letting it affect me.

"Hermione…are you going to turn that light off soon?" I looked beside me in the bed and smiled.

"Yeah, I'm done. Sorry Draco. Darling, I didn't mean to wake you." I replied.

He smiled softly. "That's ok," he muttered sleepily as he lay back down. I sighed and put my head right by his shoulder so I could hear him breathe and feel him near. I don't know why, but the chills were still all over my body…and it was a feeling I couldn't shake.

(sc)

"I have to go, Hermione. I'll be late. I'll be home at the same time. I love you," he said as he gave me a kiss. He walked to the fridge and turned back to me. "I forgot, Potter popped by this morning while you were in the shower. I told him he could wait but he didn't. And he didn't say what he wanted." Draco shot me a look that implied a hint of suspicion.

"He didn't say what he wanted? I'll get back to him," I smiled. Draco smiled back Disapparated from sight. I sighed as I sat down with some coffee and a copy of The Daily Prophet. My eyes read over the black letters and moving pictures but I don't know what it said. Why was Harry here? Was it about Ron? No, don't think about Ron. Ron is nothing. You're married to Draco.

There was a knock on the door that brought me back from my thoughts, a knock that I was grateful for. I made my way to the front door and turned the handle, not knowing that fate had an evil plan in store for me.

As the door flew open, I saw a sea of red hair. It took me a minute to realize that it wasn't hair that belonged to somebody I wanted to set eyes on. "Hey Mione," Ron said to me, staring at me with those piercing blue eyes and lopsided smile. Oh Crap. "Can I come in?" He asked me like it was nothing.

I remember him coming to the door, I was still in my right mind when I opened it, but when I let him set foot in my house and what I was thinking when I did it, is blurry to me. And now, here I sit in my pajamas and slippers while the only man I ever really loved sits across from me in the house I live in with my husband, a man who is someone my love hated more than anyone while we were in school.

I want to scream or freeze time and run away. Though I have the ability to do both, I chose to sit here and smile through this. No, I didn't want to scream, I wanted to hit him as he walked around the living room and looked at the pictures on the wall. Pictures of Draco and I, pictures that could have been him and I—if we hadn't screwed it up as bad as we did, despite all of our best efforts.

I heard him scoff as he looked at our wedding picture. "Why are you here Ron?" I stated bluntly, a little louder than I would have liked. He looked at me and sat down.

"You're still as beautiful as you ever were," he smiled. "How did all this happen?" I knew what he was referring to. By "this" he meant "Draco." I knew it too, even if he didn't say his name.

"Did you come here to start a fight Ron? I know we're so good at it but I haven't missed it at all. If that's why you came you can leave just as easily as you showed up." I stared at him. He was amused; I saw it in his eyes.

"That's not why I came, no."

"Then why? It's been three years. Three years without a letter or a call or anything. Why are you here now Ron? Where were you then?" I asked with the utmost composure, even though everything inside of me was screaming at him.

"It's simple, Mione. I made a mistake. I love you. I'm here to take you with me." He smiled when he said it but I knew that he meant every word.

"Take me with you? Are you mad? You expect me to drop my life and go with you? You must be mad…Draco would kill you!" I yelled at him.

"Kill me eh? I thought he was "reformed." No, he won't kill me because I won't have to do anything. You'll just say you want out and he'll let you go," Ron stated smartly as he walked back to my fireplace.

"If you think I'm going to do that then you are mad!"

'You don't love him. You could never love anyone else, him of all people. Look at this picture Mione. It's your wedding day and you're not even smiling." I jumped from the couch and moved toward him.

"I am smiling you git. See that?" I pointed angrily. "That's a smile."

"Sure, it looks like a smile. But it's not a real one. Anyone can charm a fake smile, especially you Hermione. No, that's not real." He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. "This," he pointed to the picture, "This is you smiling." I looked at the picture. It was from our graduation at Hogwarts. "That smile, in that wedding picture, is not you smiling; when you smile, your eyes light up—your entire face lights up. I know that about you, does Draco?"

I sighed and took the picture out of his hands. He sat down as I sat it back on the mantle. "Ron, I…I think you should leave." I turned in time to see him stand up. I knew it was too easy but I wanted to believe he was leaving.

"Mione…" he whispered. He took my hand and kissed it. My heart skipped a beat but this wasn't going to happen. I wasn't going to let him back into my life. "Not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about you. You're the one for me and I'm the one for you—the only one. You can't deny it."

He moved his hands through my hair. "Ron…" Before I knew it he had his hands on my face. That touch…it was something I hadn't felt in years. He always held my face in his hands like that before he kissed me, especially when we hadn't seen each other, when he was trying to make a point or when I was emotional. All of these apply here.

And then it happened. I felt his lips touch mine and for the first time in a long time, everything felt right again. "Why are you crying?" He asked me as he pulled me close to him. I felt safe under his arms, which only made me cry harder. "Shh…Mione don't cry. I never want to make you cry again. I love you, Mione." He kissed me again and stroked my hair.

After I was able to talk, I spoke without realizing what I was saying. "Ron, I've missed you. I never thought I'd want to be near you again after that day…But when you touch me like this and you hold me like that…I just have to admit that it's all coming back to me. All the feelings…all the love…It's so hard to believe that you're standing here, after all this time. And…" I stopped and looked at him and jumped back. "And I realize that we can't do this. I can't be with you. We hurt each other too much. It's all coming back to me too. And we can't. I can't…my heart can't do it again. I'm sorry Ron, but I think you should leave."

I said it to him without regretting it or crying and except for the part of me that wanted him to stay I meant it. He must've known that I meant it because he simply shook his head and Disapparated. I sat back down on the couch and let myself cry. He was right. He was right about everything he said. And Draco couldn't know he was here…he couldn't know he was even back in town. The thought of him finding out made my insides crawl in fear.