Ezra POV
Keeping pace with the normal bustle of the base around me, I try to drift towards the Ghost without catching any unwanted eyes.
Nobody seems to be taking notice.
I reach out with the Force in the direction of the Ghost and find it unoccupied.
Perfect. I don't really want to see anyone right now.
Barely picking up the pace, I enter the Ghost via the cargo bay ramp before the automatic doors open, granting me access to the galley. Immediately, the custom paint on each seat, denoting which seat belongs to who catches my eye and my heart starts pounding.
Okay.
I shake my head, take a breath and start to my room, which is the complete opposite direction of where my mind is. My first few steps are fine until I randomly stumble, causing me to catch myself slightly on the wall and lean up against it.
Whoa…okay.
(Flashback)
"WHY?!" I hear Hera shriek at Kanan thru the walls of the Ghost as I stop levitating my lightsaber.
"Hera, it's her family. There's more to this than meets the eye. You know how she is. This is bigger than us."
"The Rebellion?! Is it bigger than the Rebellion Kanan?!" Hera demands of Kanan. "You GAVE AWAY my best gunner! An experienced operative and familiar with the Empire's protocols!"
I hear Kanan sigh before he answers "It kind of is Hera. We found her. Isn't that part of this? Things coming full circle and her being able to go home?"
"This IS her home Kanan! Spare me with your Jedi sayings about all good things must come to an end or some kriff like that!" Hera says hotly.
"It's no Jedi saying. It just seems like that's how this is supposed to go. She…she isn't ours Hera."
Hera chokes out a sob before answering "She was the first person we took in! I love Zeb and Ezra, but it was different was Sabine and you know it! She was so scared, so timid yet so strong! She as broken and we helped to fix her! She was as good as ours!"
"C'mere…" Kanan tells her, then I hear more sobs from Hera.
"Her family…abandoned her Kanan! You saw her when we found her! On her own, battered and beaten! What kind of family does that? Why would she go back?"
"I don't know." Kanan admits. "I know it has something to do with finding a leader for Mandalore. Her family is…unique. Her mother initially wanted to lock her up, but her brother seemed to help ease things along. She loves them Hera. It's blood."
"We didn't even know she had a brother! She's an impenetrable box! You finally cracked her by pushing and pushing! And now she's gone!"
"Not forever dear. Not forever. I trust that she'll find her way back to the Rebellion." Kanan says, sounding hopeful.
I hope so.
"We don't know that! You said Gar Saxon died at Sabine's mother's hand. They're all going to be wanted now! She could die! They all could be an example!" Hera fires back.
Kanan somehow laughs. "You really think Sabine's going to fail?"
"No." Hera answers, sounding affronted. "But it's Mandalore Kanan! It's an entire society! That's what she and her family is chasing. An entire society. Why would she come back to us as opposed to helping pick up the pieces of an entire world, an whole society!"
"I have faith she'll return. It doesn't sound like you do. I'm sorry this is hurting you so much. If I'd known…I don't know." Kanan trails off, before Hera sobs even louder.
(End flashback)
The briefing when we returned went from anxious tension to disbelief when Kanan reported that Sabine is staying with her family on Krownest.
I don't know if I'll ever forget Rex and Zeb's face's go from confusion to denial and disbelief. Hera just proceeded with the briefing, only pausing to get clarification from Kanan that she…left.
Then that outburst happened.
I find myself at my door when it automatically opens, and I numbly sit at Zeb and I's bedside table.
It's way too quiet. I'm used to hearing the soft, rhythmic beats of Sabine's music, the sounds of her paiting or adjusting her gear. Her nonstop ribbing and remarks toward me.
I didn't know how much I kind of liked them.
I was hoping that helping her learn to fight with the Darksaber might help her. She's been…different since she went to the Skystrike Academy and acquired Wedge and those other pilots.
Not a bad different, but she opened up a little bit. It probably helps that I finally grew up a little bit after I got us all into so much trouble on Malachor.
I mean, I got Ahsoka killed. If I listen to Kanan and Ahsoka, Kanan isn't blind, Ahsoka is alive and the Rebellion is in a completely different place.
Just a few days ago, I even gathered up the courage to go talk to her after she and Kanan had it out. But I messed that up by reminding her that she at least had parents to go back to.
Which is in the running for dumbest thing I've ever said. Sabine's father wasn't even there at that compound.
"Whissshhh…"
The Ghost barely shakes at the might of the gust of wind, but pops me up out of my seat and into the hall.
I need to go to Sabine's room. Face this head on.
Her brother, Tristan and Sabine are almist like negatives of each other. The same image, but different values come out in both. They're both strong and powerful, but where Sabine brightens the world around her, he seemed to ground everything around him.
Didn't seem like a bad guy to me, but then again I did deflect his own shot right back at him.
The halls around me become a blur as I walk to Sabine's room, the route familiar but I still pause at the door.
She didn't like me being in there, the few times I even stopped by. She always wanted to be alone, telling me to leave her alone, choosing to be alone over with the rest of us…
Now that kind of makes a little more sense.
Sabine's door open, to the sigh of color everywhere, causing a smile to pop to my face.
This winged bird design was everywhere on Krownest. I assume it has something to do with the Wren family crest. Sabine's was the only one to have any life to it. Theirs all seemed to be stenciled on, lifeless.
Something just felt like it was missing to me. Maybe it's their "honor", pride. I don't know much about Mandalorians, and Hera and Kanan forbade me from looking into it when I first came to live on the Ghost.
Whatever this weapon Sabine worked on, it must be bad if the Empire used it on her own people, leading to her whole clan having lost its honor.
My eyes stop on the "family" portrait that Sabine did show us all months ago, after Rex joined us.
Her hair's still blue. And Kanan's eyes are unscarred.
Man…
My knees start shaking, and I plop heavily into a nearby chair.
I…
I don't know. I've been telling myself that I'm okay with this. Life will go on, the Rebellion will fill the void Sabine has left behind.
But I don't know if I can do that.
She's always been important to me. Yeah, I stupidly and clumsily tried getting with her when I first joined, but I didn't know how she operated. I didn't know the whole vibe of the Ghost.
These last few months, she's…been great. Fighting on Concord Dawn, the fighting and possession on Dathomir, training here on Atollan. She opened up a little, doubled down on taking me down a peg, which I've tried taking as a compliment and a sign that all she does is care.
I've been content with leaving my heart off to the side on this one. Sabine is the prettiest, most beautiful girl I've ever seen. No girl I've ever seen has been stronger, tougher, cooler than Sabine. She's had my back more times than I could count, and I;ve tried to do the same, putting my crush aside.
Kanan talked to me about it, saying that it wouldn't help things here on the Ghost. Romance wasn't really an option for anyone, there were bigger goals. And he was right. The few times I've let myself think about my feelings for Sabine, they've pretty much stayed the same, with the exception that she's only ingrained herself more into my life and my heart.
I really, really care about her. If nothing more than for a friend.
I do think I love her though. And now she's gone.
And I have to pick up the pieces she left behind while she puts her old world back together.
Why Sabine?
"Why?" I ask quietly, letting my head sink into my hands.
Why?
(A/N: Normally Rebels episodes don't affect my view on the entire series as a whole. And definitely don't rattle me so much that I struggle to write a chapter. But, well after "Legacy of Mandalore" I have to reassess. At least now I have an answer to who is my new favorite character. I think I might start building out this world and seeing where it goes. Enjoy the one shot—at least it is for now..)