Chapter 1 – The beginning

My dad always used to say: "Do what's best for you and the others around you." I've never really had the need to follow his advice. Until now.

Since he wasn't home most of the time, due to his job, he didn't mind when I asked him to move to a town far away from Tree Hill. He was curious though, why the sudden need to leave the town I called home since I was born, where all my friends were and everything I've ever known. I couldn't tell him the truth. I just told him it was for my benefit to change scenery and it was something I really had to do, for my shake. So he came to Tree Hill, he arranged everything and a couple of days later we were gone. Far away from my past. We were at a small town called Point Arena, in California.

Our newly purchased house was quite charming. It had two floors and a small back yard with a white fence. I liked it. The inside, however, was a whole other story.

My dad agreed to move on the condition I unpack everything, because he had to leave again the morning after we got to Point Arena. So now every little thing we owned was packed in boxes and I had to unpack and clean everything. Damn it.

I was good though, because for three days at least, my mind would be occupied and I wouldn't think about everything I left behind. My school. My friends, Haley, Nathan. My best friend Brooke. And Lucas. Everytime I remembered him I had this urge to go back. But I couldn't. And I knew pretty damn well.

So I cleaned. I started from the kitchen, then the living room, the bathrooms, my dad's bedroom, the guest room and finally, my room. I left it last because I didn't know what color to paint it. I didn't want to paint it red because it would be like my old room, like I never left. So I settled with blue. I liked blue. It was calming.

Finally, on Friday I was done with the house. Everything was in their right places. And I was bored. Since we came here, I didn't go to school, even though my dad had enrolled me on Point Arena Union High before he left. I didn't want to face any new people so soon. But now I was bored and I need to sketch, so I grabbed my iPod and went on the beach.

I could see the ocean from my window, so I figured it couldn't be far. So I put on my black hoodie and I was on my way. When I got there though, I found out that there wasn't really a beach, just magnificent rocky edges and a lighthouse, damaged by the years. The scenery was beautiful. Just what I needed to relax and forget. I sat on a rock, put on my headphones and let the music take me away. I couldn't decide what to sketch though. The ocean? The rocks? My past?

No, you can't go there, I thought. So I sighed quietly and I settled with the lighthouse, since I never sketched one before.

My hand began to move in the sketchbook as I was listening to Stripped. Such a beautiful song. It reminded me of him. Lucas. How I had stripped for him, not in the dirty way, but in the you're-the-only-one-who-ever-saw-the-real-me way. But now, all of this was over. It had to be. For everyone's sake, it had to be.

I let my mind wander for a bit before I snapped back to reality.

God, this is fucking pointless, I thought, annoyed by myself. So I gathered my stuff and left from the rocks. I didn't know what to do, so I decided to explore the town. It was a sunny day so the weather was not an issue.

Point Arena was a really small town, approximately populated by 500 people. I walked down the streets and looked around. I found a small bookstore, a groceries store, and a couple of coffee shops. From what I saw they only had what was necessary. Thank God for internet, I thought as smiled in relief to myself. At least I could find what I wanted there. And on that thought, I returned home to my computer.

I climbed up the stairs and right up to my bedroom. I opened my computer and then Firefox and waited, tapping my fingers on the desk impatiently until the connection was made. Finally, it humored me.

Oh my God! 35 e-mails? What the fuck?I scrolled down the page to see the names. I pretty much expected a few e-mails, since I've left so suddenly and without much explanation but come on, it hadn't even been a week! That was…. absurd!

Brooke, Brooke, Brooke, Haley, Nathan, Bevin, Brooke…The e-mail titles weren't very pleasant after a while. And I couldn't open them, it was too hard. They were mad and with good reason. The letters I left weren't a proper goodbye, to say the least. I shook my head to clear it from those thoughts and, as a masochist, I kept scrolling down.

Brooke, Brooke, Mouth, Lucas… I froze. I didn't move, I just stared with a blank expression at the screen, unconsciously reading at the titles. Titles of seven fucking e-mails! "Where are you?", "Please Peyton", " I miss you.." and I signed off. Why was he doing this to me? Huh? Did he want to make it harder than it already was? Fuck… I climbed onto my bed and tried to forget everything by slipping to oblivion.

I was Sunday night and I was bored. I was pulling an all-nighter, as I used to, like many nights before that. It was easier that way, because when I slept after a couple of days awake, I slept like dead. If I, however, slept and wasn't that tired…the dreams were awful. I kept waking in the middle of the night, heart beating like crazy and panting. And I couldn't even remembered most of them. I just remembered the horrible feeling they gave me. Like I can't see what's real anymore, confusing reality with dreaming and kinda feeling trapped there. Whenever I slept, I woke up more tired than before. So when I could, I pulled all-nighter. Of course it wasn't as often as I wished, cause of the school and all, but I took what I could get.

It was 1:00 am and I had all the time in the world. I didn't have any school work to do to occupy myself, because I didn't go to school all week. First day tomorrow. Yay me!

I stood from the desk chair where I was seating all this time and I went to the down floor, thinking what to do to pass the time. As I was opening the fridge to grab a juice, my eyes fell into the front door. I could take a walk, I smiled to myself. I loved walking at night when everything is so quiet. So I put on a hoodie, my black all-stars and I was off.

The fresh air hit me the moment I stepped on the porch and I was relaxed already. As I had predicted, there was no one outside at this hour. I walked away from the house and decide to go to a small forest I spotted when we first came with dad here. I remembered where it was. The benefits of living in such a small town, I mean, I couldn't get lost even if wanted to! Besides, I wasn't far.

As I walked down the main road, I took the time to look better everything in town, without people staring at me. The little stores with souvenirs, the houses with big yards like mine… I turned left to an alley and after a while I was on the edges of the forest. As I said, it wasn't big, but I've always been a sucker for forests. That's why something creepy like the woods at night didn't frighten me. I walked for a bit and I found a fallen tree. I sat there, absorbing with all my senses everything around me. The smell, the sounds, everything was so comfortably familiar. I searched my pockets for a lighter and my cigarettes. As I put one in my mouth, for the millionth time I considered to quit. And for the millionth time I shook that thought away.

As I took a pull from my cigarette, I heard a noise. Like someone was walking nearby. I turned my head in the direction of the noise. I admit, I slightly panicked, but not as I should. I knew how to protect myself. So I was seating there, waiting to see who disturbed the peace of the woods besides me. A few moments later, a figure appeared from the trees. All I could see was that he was a guy, about six-feet tall and with an awesome body. He saw me sitting at the tree, and I could tell a smile lifted on his face as he spoke.

"Hello".