Hey all! So, I am back. I know it didn't take long but I missed writing + I am on summer break right now so here we are. This is a little something that has been sitting in my head for some time now. It is season three based and basically just a little take on how season three could have gone if it wasn't such a mess in real life. Hope you enjoy!
Chapter 1:
Quinn Fabray slams her locker door shut, determined to ignore the stares that she can feel coming at her from every direction.
She had all but disappeared off the face of the planet this summer. She told as few people as she had to that she would be spending the holiday months with her sister and her husband on the east coast while her mother was on a mixer cruise for divorcees in the Caribbean. She spent the summer shucking fresh oysters for a restaurant on the bay with rich boys wearing pastel colors whose parents actually wanted them to understand the value of a dollar. Then, she returned to Ohio for her first day of school with her blonde hair chopped off and dyed pink and the tattoo of an obscure celebrity on the small of her back.
Quinn understands that her postpartum freak out is delayed but in that first year after she had given her daughter up for adoption, she refused to give herself the opportunity to consider the implications of her actions. She had spent her junior year trying to pretend that it never happened, trying to pretend that Beth didn't exist. Pretending. That was all she was ever doing.
It had taken Quinn a year to realize that she was no longer the pretty, popular cheerleader she had been before her pregnancy. It had taken her even longer to face the fact that maybe she had never been that girl at all.
Inevitably, the protective bubble that she had placed around herself burst and the fall had been hard and painful. In hindsight, she realizes that she should have expected all of this to catch up with her eventually, but anticipation has never been her strong suit.
This is why Quinn had kicked off her senior year of high school standing outside of the rear entrance smoking a cigarette in the vicinity of a girl wearing a black hoodie and cargo pants despite the fact that the temperature has been hovering in the upper seventies all week.
Smoking is a habit that she had forced herself to pick up. She does not particularly enjoy it. She had started in the beginning of the summer and still, the smoke hung in her chest like a brick and made her cough every time she lit up.
But Quinn was looking for a way to rebel and this seemed like the perfect start. Besides, one of the fisherman for the restaurant that she had worked for over the summer had the hots for her and even though he was in his forties and Quinn would never entertain the idea of actually getting with him, she had left him dangling because he would always bum her a smoke whenever she asked.
Quinn had sucked her cigarette down to its filter in silence. She said nothing, only observed from a distance as students shuttled into the school in their back-to school outfits looking so happy, so cheerful, so blissfully unaware.
The whole scene made Quinn sick to her stomach. She was just starting to think that there is nobody in this school who could actually understand her and then, she went to stamp her cigarette out with the toe of her boot and the girl in all black approached her and asked her to skip first period to hang out with a group of friends who she referred to as Skanks.
Quinn had not only skipped first period, she had skipped the entire morning. She was familiar with the reputation of the Skanks as everybody in Lima was but found that her time was better spent passing around a stale forty ounce that one of the girls had stolen from her foster father's fridge than going to AP Biology class anyway.
Quinn did not so much as walk inside of her school until right before lunch. With a healthy buzz dulling her wounded mind, Quinn finds herself at her locker just as the bell indicating the start of lunch rings.
The first person that she sees who she recognizes is Rachel Berry which seems like a bad way to start her year.
Rachel is at her locker. She is wearing an outfit that Quinn can't tell would suit an infant or an elderly person better and she is meticulously taping pictures of her and Finn that they had taken over the summer on the inside of her locker.
She hasn't even spoken to Quinn yet and Rachel is already driving the blonde insane.
When the young singer finally does spot the ex-cheerleader, her brows furrow in the center in a way that is all too familiar with Quinn, who knows enough to understand that she is about to get an earful.
"You missed glee rehearsal yesterday."
"How did you have glee rehearsal yesterday?" Quinn scoffs. "Today is the first day of school."
"We had auditions yesterday, Quinn!" Rachel huffs, placing her hands against her hips. "And in case you were wondering, they didn't go very well. We really could have used you."
"Relax, will you? I was in Rhode Island at my sister's all summer. I just got back last night."
That is a lie. Quinn has been back in Lima for nearly a week. Still, lying seems like a better option than the alternative of having to listen to Rachel Berry preach to her about team unity and dedication. She needs another cigarette already.
"You weren't in AP Biology this morning either," Rachel pushes. "I know you're registered for that class. The teacher called your name for attendance three times and you never showed up."
Quinn rolls her eyes. "Thanks for the concern mom, but I'm dropping AP Bio. I'm dropping all of my AP's."
"What about Yale?" Rachel asks, folding her arms over her chest. Quinn snorts at her. She doesn't need Rachel Berry's concern. She doesn't need anybody's concern.
"What about it?"
Now it is Rachel's turn to roll her eyes. "You know Quinn, this really isn't a good look for you."
Quinn cocks her head with sarcastic hurt as she wraps a finger around a short lock of wavy, pink hair.
"You don't like it?" she asks the brunette. "I dyed it myself."
"I'm not talking about your hair, I'm talking about your delinquency," Rachel clarifies sharply. "We have glee this afternoon after school. I am enforcing a strict attendance policy this year. It is our last chance to win Nationals and we will win Nationals. You better be there."
The small girl slams her locker shut and shoulders past Quinn. Unfortunately, the blonde has to travel in the same direction as Rachel in order to get to the smoke pit outside. She follows the girl but keeps a safe distance just in case Rachel decides that she is not finished lecturing her. She is craving a cigarette, wondering if the Skanks are still underneath the bleachers waiting for her. In fact, she is so busy inside of her own head that she doesn't even notice when Rachel skids to a halt so suddenly that Quinn walks straight into her back.
"What the hell, Berry?" Quinn snaps at the girl, giving her a little shove for added measure, but the brunette does not appear to notice. She says nothing to Quinn which is unusual because Quinn usually couldn't pay Rachel to shut up whenever she was around her.
"Hello, Earth to Berry." Quinn walks around Rachel and snaps her fingers in front of the girl's face but she does not so much as blink, only stares straight ahead with a bewildered, almost frightened look on her face.
"Did you do drugs before you came to school today? What are you looking at, Berry? Answer me!"
Rachel still does not say anything but this time, she at least acknowledges Quinn. She grabs the blonde by her shoulders and spins her around so that she is looking in the same direction as Rachel.
Quinn's eyes adjust to the distance. It takes her a moment to scan through the bodies to find what had stunned Rachel so senseless but then, Quinn does see it and she realizes that she is going to need something much stronger than a cigarette.
The woman in front of them is short like Rachel but the implication of her presence is enough to make up for that fact. She is wearing a sleek fitting, purple dress and tall heels that echo like gun fire. She doesn't notice Quinn and Rachel staring at her but that is only because she looks determined, like she is on a mission and is resolved to complete it.
There is no mistaking Shelby Corcoran, though. Quinn couldn't forget that woman if she tried, and she has tried.
Before she can notice the two girls, Shelby makes a sharp cut down the opposite hallway away from Rachel and Quinn. She disappears from the girls' sight, but it is not far enough. In Quinn's opinion, Shelby could live on the moon and it still wouldn't be far enough.
Slowly, Quinn turns towards Rachel with her mouth agape. The brunette is wearing an expression identical to how Quinn feels. The blonde knows that she is trying to convey a new reputation for toughness, but for a moment even she forgets herself as she swallows towards Rachel without even bothering to hide her shock.
"What the hell is she doing here?"
Rachel still attends all of her afternoon classes, of course she does, but now that she has seen Shelby wandering the hallways, she can hardly concentrate, afraid that the next turn that she makes will be straight into her estranged mother.
Rachel has not so much as considered the woman in some time. It had taken her months to get to a place where she could turn off the memory of Shelby but that didn't mean that she ever truly forgot the last time the woman had entered her life and nearly ruined it.
While Shelby had been on Rachel's mind a lot when she first left, she hasn't really thought about the woman at all in quite some time. She has no idea where Shelby had disappeared to for the last year and a half or why she decided to pick now of all times to return.
Rachel hasn't seen Quinn since the two of them learned of Shelby's return in the most unceremonious way possible even though they shared the majority of their afternoon classes together. She wasn't really expecting to. Rumor was already circulating that Quinn had spent the morning with a notorious gang of girls who dubbed themselves as Skanks of all things. It was hardly a good look for a girl with so much to lose but Rachel knows that it is hardly any business of hers. Out of all the people Quinn could talk to, Rachel knows that she would likely be the last on the blonde's list.
Rachel is surprised when she walks into the choir room after school and actually sees Quinn waiting there. She knows that she had warned Quinn to come but something seems different with the blonde and nothing anybody says seems to hold any merit with her anymore.
"You came," Rachel states simply. It is still early enough that it is only the two of them in the choir room. Despite the ample space, Rachel chooses the vacant seat directly next to Quinn, who looks upset by this fact.
"Don't get too excited," Quinn warns dryly. "I figured that if Shelby is back it probably has something to do with this stupid club. I'm only here to figure out her intentions."
"Her intentions are probably to have a job."
"Stop pretending like you're so naïve," Quinn rolls her eyes. "You know as well as I do that she wouldn't take a job at this school of all places without it having something to do with us."
Rachel sucks her lips inward and bites down hard on the bottom one. She has been trying not to think like that. She has been trying desperately to give Shelby the benefit of the doubt ever since she first saw her in the hallway this morning, but she realizes now that she hadn't spent her entire afternoon distracted because she actually believed that Shelby was here for a mere job.
Quinn watches the girl's reaction with a satisfied look on her face. It is nice to see Rachel show her actual feelings and portray something other than the carefree, happy-go-lucky kid who she always only pretends to be.
"She's here to flaunt Beth in both of our faces, Rachel," Quinn continues, hammering the nail in the coffin of Rachel's optimism. "And I for one am not going to be caught off guard by it."
Rachel's need to respond is cut short as the choir room door opens and Finn stumbles inside with a sense of urgency on his face. Rachel shrinks away from him before she can tell herself not to. She hasn't had the opportunity to tell Finn that she had seen Shelby yet. She is taking all AP classes this year in order to boost her NYADA application and Finn could hardly keep up with that. Rachel rarely saw him during the school day anymore unless it was during lunch or glee.
"I just had your mom as a substitute in my Spanish class," he tells Rachel breathlessly, sliding into the one empty chair besides her.
"Don't call her that," Rachel sighs, weaving her fingers through her thick hair.
"Did you know that she was coming back?" Finn pushes. He seems oblivious to the tone in Rachel's voice, one which seems to indicate just how little she wants to talk about this. Quinn almost feels sorry for her. Away for the entire summer, she had almost forgotten what it was like having to put up with him.
"Don't you think that I would have told you if I did?" Rachel snaps and Finn reels backwards if only to avoid having his head chewed off any further. Quinn feels her eyes widen, almost uncomfortable as she watches the normally composed girl lose her nerve. It is now clear that this situation was upsetting Rachel much more than the brunette had been initially letting on.
Rachel huffs away from her slack-jawed boyfriend. She does not want any more surprises today, any more anger. Today was supposed to be the first day of the best year of her life. She couldn't let Shelby take that from her too.
Quinn feels her forehead slant with concern towards the brunette's fading composure. The worst part is that she knows Rachel sees the way that she is looking at her before she can clear it off her face entirely. Rachel catches the entire thing.
The choir room fills gradually. Everybody can tell that there is something wrong because Rachel is sitting front and center, yet the room is completely silent. They have so much to anticipate for their upcoming senior year that everybody had been expecting her to speak for hours. Usually, they were begging for her to stop. Today, they find themselves almost uncomfortable in her silence.
When Mr. Schuester walks into the classroom, he is staring at Rachel, Quinn, and Puck with a look on his face that allows the girls to realize that he is aware of Shelby's return too. As word gradually starts to spread, the two of them wonder if Puck knows. But he had attended less class today than even Quinn and his face looks relaxed and carefree leading both Rachel and Quinn to silently conclude that he has no idea.
"Listen up you guys," Mr. Schuester silences the class with a sigh that projects a worry that transcends across the room. "I know that our open auditions yesterday didn't exactly go as planned."
"One person showed up," somebody snaps from the back. Judging by the tone the voice is easily pinpointed back to Santana. "And she was terrible."
"Well, she wasn't particularly happy about being rejected by you guys yesterday," Mr. Schuester explains, shaking his head gently. "And as it turns out, her father has a lot of money; a lot of money that he has dedicated to funding a second glee club at this school with his daughter as the lead."
A series of giggles erupts around the announcement. The only people who are not laughing are Rachel and Quinn, who glance at each other uncertainly, neither particularly liking where this is heading.
"I wouldn't be too concerned about a one-person glee club headed by Sugar Motta, Mr. Schue."
"The thing is Kurt, this isn't just any glee club. Mr. Motta also fronted the funding for an outside choir director." He pauses. The way he glances at Puck and then Quinn and then Rachel tells the two girls what he is going to say even before he says it. "And I think that we all know not to underestimate Shelby Corcoran."
A collective gasp goes up inside of the classroom. Rachel and Quinn feel themselves flush as they point their eyes towards the floor. Both are very aware of just how many eyes are on them. Their prior knowledge of Shelby's presence seems to glow like a neon sign above both of their heads.
"Wait, Ms. Corcoran is back?" Puck swallows from somewhere in the back. Quinn closes her eyes. She realizes too late that the first thing she should have done after seeing Shelby was to find Puck. She had been selfish, absorbed in her own way. She knew exactly what it felt like to have to find out about Shelby's return without warning and she had still let it happen to Puck. Quinn swallows and closes her eyes. If this was only the first day of school, she didn't want to know what the rest of the school year had in store for her.
"She is," Mr. Schuester confirms with a nod. The room tenses and quiets as the last shred of hope is broken, leaving everybody equally confused.
"But that doesn't make any sense," Finn insists, his tone low and drawling. Usually, he always sounds this confused, but this particular instance is unique in that the rest of the glee club is confused right alongside him. "Ms. Corcoran is back just to build her own glee club to compete against us? Why would she do that?"
Finn's question makes something inside of Rachel burst. The chord has been tensing dangerously all day and now, she feels it finally snap.
Shelby wasn't here just for a job. She wasn't here to introduce Puck and Quinn to their child. She wasn't even here to apologize to Rachel for the abysmal way that she had treated her, for abandoning her without warning for the second time in her life. Instead, she was only here because some rich stranger was paying her to be.
Rachel hadn't been expecting any of this to be about her but that terrible, self-destructive force that continues to hold onto hope whenever it comes to Shelby can't help but feel disappointed anyway. It feels like she is being stabbed in a still-healing wound. She is standing on the stage, spilling her guts and Shelby is the one holding the knife.
Her chair is scraping against the linoleum floor before she even realizes that she is getting up. The silence that falls throughout the choir room is even more deafening than it had been before. If anybody is moving to follow Rachel, the girl doesn't seem to notice. Instead, she storms out of the room with the same force that a football player might use when making a tackle and throws herself hard into the hallway.
Rachel isn't exactly sure where to find Shelby, but she has an idea. She may not know her mother very well, but she does know Shelby Corcoran and if that woman was in charge of a glee club, chances are they were rehearsing.
There is only one other room with a piano in the entire school and that is in the auditorium. Rachel enters it without warning. Sure enough, there is Shelby, exactly where Rachel had been expecting to find her.
The older woman is sitting behind the piano with that awful girl Sugar – who Rachel is certain not even Shelby could turn into a star – standing beside her singing vocal warmups with the grace of a feral cat. The notion of Shelby's impending failure feels somehow satisfying to Rachel.
"You could have at least given me some warning!"
Livid, Rachel makes her presence known early, screaming at Shelby even as she storms down the length of the aisle.
She has prepared roughly a thousand speeches for Shelby throughout the course of her day yet somehow, this is what comes out. She realizes that as prepared as she thought she had been to face the woman, she has no idea how to put into words just how much Shelby had hurt her.
Staring at her now, Rachel cannot believe that there had ever been a time that she had wanted this woman more involved in her life. Now, as far as Rachel is concerned Shelby can drop off the face of the Earth and it wouldn't make any difference to her.
Her sudden presence clearly startles Shelby and Rachel feels a sense of satisfaction in the idea that Rachel could at least get back at her in this sense.
The woman's hand slips against the keyboard creating a painfully sharp chord. Ironically, it is the only note that Sugar Motta actually manages to match with her voice.
Shelby's head turns. She sees her estranged daughter for the first time in over a year and her face falls. Rachel reads her expression. It is not one that might signify an apology for everything that she has put Rachel through. Instead, she only looks sorry that she had gotten caught by her daughter before she could catch Rachel first and do things on her own terms.
"Rachel…" Shelby starts, but Rachel doesn't even acknowledge the attempt to stop her before she can even get started.
"Why do you always have to keep popping up just when things are finally starting to go well for me?"
"Wow, I guess somebody had a bad first day." Rachel hears the high-pitched, nasally snide comment from Sugar Motta and she almost feels angry enough to hit the girl.
"You need to leave," Rachel glares at Sugar, pointing an accusing finger at her, daring her for a challenge. "Now!"
Rachel is certain that nobody has ever spoken to Sugar Motta like this before. She is sure that the girl has never so much as heard the word no. But despite being ready and willing to deliver an unsuspecting insult, Sugar does not seem to be prepared for a confrontation. She scurries off the stage without so much as a word.
Rachel climbs onto the stage and faces Shelby who is sitting stiff on the piano bench. Neither of them says a single word until Rachel finally hears the auditorium door slam shut behind them as Sugar leaves.
"Why are you here, Shelby?" she finally breathes through the silence. "I have a boyfriend who I love, we are going to win Nationals this year, and I have already started my application to NYADA. Do you have like a radar or something inside of your brain that goes off whenever I start feeling a semblance of stability? Is that what this is? Because you were so messed up at my age, you can't let me live my life?"
Rachel hadn't intended to project so much emotion in front of Shelby. She didn't want the woman to see just how much she has damaged her. She knows she has failed however, the second she sees Shelby stand calmly from the piano bench so that she could face Rachel completely, crossing her arms tight over her chest.
"Are you finished?" she asks Rachel with a tone that makes the girl want to throttle her.
"Oh, I am far from finished."
"I was offered a job with good pay and I accepted it," Shelby states pointedly, practically cutting Rachel off. "That's it, Rachel. I do not have any ulterior motives against you or Quinn or Puck. I have a child to feed."
Rachel crosses her own arms over her chest and glowers, trying not to consider just how much she resembles the woman standing before her by doing this. She wonders if Shelby even thinks about the words that come out of her mouth before she says them. More importantly, she wonders if she thinks about just how much those words hurt the girl that is half a piece of herself.
Is Rachel really supposed to just accept that Shelby viewed this as just another job without even considering her? Judging by Shelby's track record of not considering her at all, Rachel realizes that it is likely that Shelby is actually telling the truth.
"I'm sorry that I didn't have the opportunity to reach out and find you before you found me first," Shelby continues when Rachel says nothing. "That was not my intention."
"It has been a full school day and still I am the one who had to find you," Rachel hisses. She is tired of Shelby's excuses. Rachel has been trying to justify them since the woman had left if only to ease her own guilt. Now, she is out of reasons to keep doing so. "My boyfriend had you as a substitute in class today. Do you know how humiliating that is? A phone call might have been nice. Hell, I would have even taken a text. You have no idea what it felt like having to find out that you were back because I saw you walking down the hallway! The worst part is that you don't even seem to care."
"Rachel-"
"No!" Rachel cuts her off sharply. Tears are prickling against the corners of her eyes despite the fact that she had spent the entire day convincing herself that she would not cry in front of Shelby when the two finally came face-to-face. "I don't want to hear it anymore, Shelby. You do not get to just pop into and out of my life at your convenience. You don't get to start your own glee club at my school, you don't get to uproot my life again. So, I'll make you a deal. I will keep my distance from you and all I ask in return is that you do the same for me. As for your little glee club, don't expect it to last very long."
Rachel performs a sharp about-face before Shelby can even think to try to say something else to her. Stupidly, she was almost hoping for Shelby to stop her, perhaps with some noble speech or profound words of wisdom but she doesn't, and Rachel hates the fact that she still allows herself to be disappointed by this woman.
Fuming, Rachel storms behind the curtained-off area next to the stage leading to the side exit. Her vision is so clouded with anger that when she runs straight into another person, her shock is what knocks her over more than the collision.
She sees a mass of blonde hair on her way to the floor and feels a terrible pain in her backside that matches the pain in her pride when she hits the floor with a grunt. Her cheeks are flaming red with embarrassment as she glances tentatively up at Quinn. She is expecting to get torment from the blonde but much to her surprise, Quinn only reaches out her hand to help Rachel back to her feet.
"What are you doing here?" Rachel asks as she wipes the grime from the filthy auditorium floor off her skirt.
"Do you really think that I was going to miss out on watching that?" Quinn asks and when she smiles at Rachel it almost looks genuine. "That was the closest that I have ever come to actually liking you, Berry."
Rachel knows that coming from Quinn Fabray, she should take this as a compliment. Instead, she only feels more embarrassed.
"I've never been that angry before," Rachel admits like the idea actually scares her. "When I saw you this morning, I thought you were crazy because you were hanging out with the Skanks and you dyed your hair pink and got that stupid tattoo… Now I think I understand why you did it."
Quinn nods solemnly at the brunette. She doesn't say anything but the tone in her gesture says everything that Rachel wishes her own mother would have the guts or at least the decency to say to her.
Quinn goes so long without speaking that Rachel thinks she isn't going to say anything at all. She smirks politely at the blonde but doesn't want this discomfort to linger any longer than it has to.
She moves to push past her. She doesn't know where she is going to go. She can hardly go back to glee after what just happened. She could go home but she would have to tell her dads about seeing Shelby at school today and she isn't sure that she is ready to do that just yet either.
"Hey Rachel," Quinn calls back to her at the last minute and Rachel turns around to face her, silently imploring her to continue.
"You don't have to always pretend like you're okay, you know," the blonde finally says after a moment. Rachel purses her lips slightly but nods.
"For the record Quinn, neither do you," Rachel tells her after a moment, looking up to meet Quinn's deep, hazel eyes.
Quinn stares at her for a long time. She does not move or speak or do anything other than stare straight through Rachel as though she is seeing the girl for the first time. She had taken Rachel Berry's presence earlier as a bad omen. She started her school year thinking that the only people here who could understand the pain that she was feeling was The Skanks. Looking at Rachel now, she realizes that the tiny brunette has actually managed to surprise her.
Luckily, before Quinn can do something stupid like tell Rachel this, Rachel pushes through the door and into the hallway without so much as a goodbye. She leaves Quinn alone in the darkened stage vestibule to wonder just how many more surprises Rachel has in store for her and whether or not Rachel Berry might just be the ally that Quinn has been looking for this entire time.