A/N's: It has been a long time since I've uploaded or updated anything. I will be getting back to finishing what I still have in progress but, I wanted to post what I'd been working on while I edit the other fics. Feedback would be loved and adored.
I tried to edit this as best as I could... I will update it as I find any silly mistakes. Please enjoy!

Chapter 1: We thought we would continue on forever

"Life's a game and it's not fair... I break the rules so I don't care."

~ Run this town by Jay Z ft. Rihanna and Kanye West

She held Lloyd close to her, gently petting his head while running her hands through his hair as she rocked herself in a chair. She'd been considering something for a little while. Kratos would refuse at first. He would most likely be horrified that she'd even suggest such a thing. She glanced down at her baby boy, and sighed. His face was against her chest, seemed so peaceful. It was as though he was almost being raised normally. Almost. However, a closer look would show you the small scuffs on his clothes from being rapidly packed and unpacked, put on and pulled off. His cute tufts of hair were a mess, and he had specks of dirt all over if you looked in the right places.

"This is no way to raise a child..." She held him a little bit more tightly. Anytime, they needed money or they get into a tight spot, Kratos saved them. But that was only because he was the only one who could. Her eyes wandered to the exsphere attached to her hand. It was the whole reason why the Desians even cared about her. They could've escaped and they would've barely bat an eye. Sure, they'd be pissed someone got away but she was just one of many. However, she just had to be special. She just had to be the Angelus project. They'd been looking into a way that could stop the crystal from feeding off of her and they'd discovered that there was a dwarf near a town called Iselia who might be able to aid them. However, with or without this thing sucking her life away...

She was weak.

How was she supposed to help in any regard towards keeping her family safe? Kratos couldn't do it all on his own. She couldn't allow him to bear everything on his shoulders. Lloyd adorably murmured and the vibrations of his voice calmed her heavy heart. She kissed the top of his head. She would surrender everything for him, anything to keep him safe. Anna reached into her pocket, pulling out a locket. Popping it open, her hand shook as she stared at the photo of them. Closing it, she gripped it tightly. Surprisingly, the light noise of the locket closing seemed to wake Lloyd. The two year old sleepily opened his eyes and rubbed his face more into his mother's chest. She smiled down at him a little. Was it possible that he felt her unease? He looked up at her, almost seeming worried.

She stood up, smiled and nodded to herself and to Lloyd. She pulled him away from her and raised him above her head. His eyes widened as a childish smile broke out over the toddler's face and he squealed in joy. She couldn't help but laugh. Bringing him down closer to her again, she moved closer to his tiny ears.

"I've made up my mind, Lloyd. Your father and I will protect you, for as long as we live." Lloyd wrapped his arms around her, just wanting to give his mom a hug. She looked out the window, though she wasn't quite looking outside. "Even if I don't live as a human - without the both of you, my humanity means nothing."

Anna watched Lloyd sleep peacefully, listening to his soft snores. She found herself doing this often, almost as if it had become her pastime. It was safer to stay inside to begin with, and the constant feeling of her life draining made her want to be around for her son. It had been three days since she made up her mind, and Kratos would be back soon, likely just a little into the late afternoon. Unconsciously, she gripped her left arm. What would convince him to let her give up her humanity? There would have to be no choice. She would have to make sure he understood. There was still a problem though. Being like Kratos didn't make her immune to death. She frowned.

Mithos Yggdrasill could murder her and her son in less than two seconds, human or not. They'd have to find some way to allow him to let them live. What did he have to fear though? Was it just because he wanted her special exsphere? If that was all, there must be something they could bet on. Mithos was simply a really big kid wasn't he? He had an ego. If they could prey on that, they might be able to-

"...Anna." She slowly looked up at him. A smile spread widely across her face and he sighed. He knew she was safe but seeing her sitting there put his heart more at ease than anything, except for one thing. He glanced at Lloyd, and his heart was finally calmed. She stood and pulled Kratos into a hug.

"Welcome back! Did everything go well?"

"As well as I'd hoped. We should have a decent amount of gald for a little while. We'll probably leave late tomorrow morning. Asgard will not serve as a safe haven for long. We should move on." Seeing Anna's tired face, he hugged her again, tightly. "I'm sorry about the constant moving... but-" He found a finger on his lips, effectively silencing him.

"How many times do I have to tell you? No more apologies, or someone other than our precious baby boy is getting a spanking!" She smirked as he shook his head, a faint smile pulled on his lips.

"Right. Have you had dinner yet?" He sauntered towards the kitchen-like area of their room.

"I haven't actually. I got a little lost in my thoughts watching Lloyd sleep."

"... You need to make sure you keep up your strength, Anna." She huffed at this.

"I have been! He does get tiring during the day you know? He likes to run around, and always wants to play. I'd have to eat in order to keep this up day in and day out with him. Tonight, I was just... thinking." She fiddled with her hair, while glancing towards the curtains. He looked back at her suspiciously then returned to preparing a meal for her.

"Thinking? Somehow, this worries me." She huffed again resting her hands on her waist and pouted.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kratos turned to her, putting a finger to his lips. Once she noticed, he pointed to Lloyd. She looked back at him, as thoughts of her baby boy consumed her thoughts. I have to do this. There's no way we can live like this. We won't... survive like this. Her hands fell from her hips and hung at her sides as her shoulders slumped. Her eyes burned as her vision got misty. She heard Kratos put a plate on the table. He reached for a cup as he noticed in the corner of his eye that Anna had frozen in place. He turned towards her, still holding the cup. He became uneasy again. His stomach twisted as though the tension was wringing any life it had like a wet towel.

"...Anna?" She clenched her fists.

He won't accept this... but I have to try.

"...Is something-?" She turned to face him, her eyes hard with determination yet filled with tears. She clenched her fists even tighter, until her chewed nails began to dig into her dry skin. Kratos watched her, his mouth open a little in surprise.

"Kratos... I know I'm demanding. I know I ask a lot of you. I know you do a lot for us- you've done a lot for us... for the sake of our family. I..." Her voice dropped to a whisper but she kept her eyes locked with his. He was already forming his argument against her. She couldn't let this one go. "I want you... to find a way to turn me into a Cruxis Angel."

The sound of glass shattering echoed throughout the room. Anna found it somewhat amusing that his expression had still failed to change, but she knew she had struck a painful chord. He didn't want this for her. He would oppose her as much as he could. Lloyd wiggled in his sleep, his face contorting in discomfort.

"Anna, what-"

"You're not going to refuse me on this, Kratos." She spoke in a harsh whisper. "Please try to understand! Lloyd needs both of us! We can't run from Cruxis for ever, and this... is no way to raise a child! We're always running and you... you're the one who saves us! You are the one who earns us everything we need to survive. I just can't let you do it alone! I..." He strolled across the room, with a grim look on his face. He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against hers. She let her tears fall. "I have to do everything I can to protect you both. I can't stand feeling helpless anymore." She looked down at the floor. "I am willing to sacrifice everything, if it means that we can stay together. I would give anything." She turned back to Lloyd, who was waking up from all the noise. "I would give anything to give him a life he deserves."

Kratos hugged her from behind, silent. She lightly touched his fingertips. He watched as his son looked around the room. As soon as his eyes landed on them, he seemed to try to figure out how he could reach them. He pushed himself up into a sitting position and climbed off of the bed. He went straight to his father and put his arms up, like he was trying to fly. Anna giggled sadly and picked him up.

"Hm? You're all excited because you want to see your Daddy huh? Well, maybe in a few moments I'll pass you over." The auburn haired swordsman looked downcast and deep in thought. This was never what he wanted her or her son, but he could see the point she was making. However...

"Anna... becoming an angel-" he struggled to get that word out of his mouth, "That won't make fighting him any-"

"I know. I've thought about that too." The air was tense and the silence was heavy. Wasn't there another way for her to help? Kratos shook his head and glared at the floor. He couldn't- "You're going to say that I can't but… I will just tell you that you must." He looked up at her as she handed their son over to him. Lloyd smiled happily and instinctively hugged his father around his neck. Kratos rubbed his son's back gently, still thinking. Perhaps with time she might give up her plan. He could only hope.

"I … don't know if I can even consider this. There's nothing I want more than to keep our family away from Cruxis. It would be like walking into another prison. I've told you before, Mithos is not like who he was. He's lost himself and become rather unpredictable. I don't even know for sure if being part of Cruxis would guarantee our safety." He sighed. "We can talk about this another time. But not until after we get a key crest made for you. We're still awhile away from Iselia and we have to tread carefully. Meanwhile, you will think hard about this. You know well enough that I would do anything to try to stop you but, I understand why you feel that way. I understand why you would want that. Regardless, you must understand. This is irreversible, Anna. Once you surrender what humanity you have left, you'll never get it back."

She looked away from him sadly but nodded, crossing her arms stubbornly. Then, to his surprise, a regretful smile found its way onto her face. "Fine. To be honest though, I had already felt like the ranch had drained every last bit of my humanity anyways."

While the night held its reign and the moon hung high in the sky, Kratos' eyes snapped open at the sound of a mumble. He waited patiently to hear the sound of Lloyd's soft breathing, but realized he was awake, as the boy's breathing sounded rough and rapid. He had been sleeping between his parents and cuddled closely with his mother. He rolled over to see his father. His eyes were wet, and he rubbed his face into Kratos' chest, shaking a little.

A nightmare perhaps? The man wondered. Worried about disturbing Anna's sleep, he raised himself off the mattress and took Lloyd in his arms. He swung his legs over to stand, and strolled outside.

Lloyd's whimpering calmed down even once the boy felt the wind against his skin. Kratos sat on the steps just outside of the building they were staying. As it was late, no one was outside. Sounds of insects and nocturnal animals filled the air. The man waited until the boy's heart and breathing returned to normal.

"Did you have a bad dream?" Lloyd looked up at his father, then glanced away, nodding. "Do you want to talk about it?" The boy looked like he was going to cry again, but he nodded anyway.

"A monster. I sawed a monster, Daddy." The boy paused and seemed like he was trying to gather the courage to say more. Tears dripped down his face, and the man's heart clenched at the sight of his son. He hugged the boy a little tighter in an attempt to encourage him that he was safe. "I – Mommy was…" Kratos stiffened. "Mommy was a monster. Mommy almost hurt – Daddy was hurt and Noishe got hurt because of me. I was very scared and- Mommy and me fell and –" The little boy was shaking. Lloyd's dream still haunted him.

"LLOYD! ANNA!" The desperate cries of his father echoed through his head. The boy hid his face in Kratos' chest again as he cried, sobs causing him shake roughly. There was nothing more he could say. There was no way Lloyd could describe any more of the horrors he saw. Kratos hugged the little boy, and rubbed his head.

"Have no fear, Lloyd. Even though it's scary, it was just a dream. I'm right here. And your mom is sleeping just inside. We will protect you, with everything that we have." He felt Lloyd nod and the boy calmed down significantly. "Do you trust me, Lloyd? Can you believe in us for me?" Lloyd nodded again. They sat there for a few moments together as Kratos watched the stars in the sky. Eventually, Lloyd followed suit. The swordsman glanced at his little boy and was relieved to see him smiling as he stared at the stars in awe. Feeling eyes on him, Lloyd looked back at his father with an expression of wonder that quickly turned into a smile. Suddenly, he gave his father a kiss on the cheek and wrapped his arms around his neck.

"I love you, Daddy," the boy said endearingly. A strong warmth hit Kratos like a tsunami of pure emotion. He wrapped his arms around the little boy.

"I love you too, Lloyd. I swear to protect you." Lloyd nodded again, but sleepily. Soon enough, Kratos could hear his adorable snores again. The boy had finally returned to a peaceful sleep. Worried about waking him, he decided to remain outside watching the stars, and listening to his boy sleep.

It was all because of this little boy. All because of him, Kratos felt like he would have the strength to atone for his mistakes and right the world once and for all. If he wanted Lloyd to have a proper world to live in and look forward to, he had to.

Next

Chapter 2: But our everyday fragile lives crumbled and faded away

"Alright. Let's make this more fun. You're right. I can't have Kratos die and while I would like having the Angelus Project returned, it is still… incomplete."

A/N's: And That's that. Let me know what you think, what you expect... what did you like and what did you dislike?

Also, it's kind of just become habit for me to put a lyric to music I used to help get me into the right mental state to write. Let me know if there are songs that you use to help you write and what they are.

Thanks for reading! See you in the next installment.