I havent updated the one story I had in a long time. I am now starting a new story, its not really much of a story, its really just a call for help. Many things have happened to me in the span of when I left fanfiction for a while, I have no idea whats wrong with me. I went to school like any other day, except something was different, I felt different, I felt many things. Im naturally a very happy person but today I didnt know what I was. I pushed the feeling away and went about my day like normal, and then lunch came around. The girls who sit behind me in lunch bicker alot, they pick on each other and I predicted one day they'll just have had enough of each other and fight or something of that sort. Well today was that day, all I remember was the pain I felt when the girls fist connected with the other girls face, how I had held my head and made this tiny squeaking sound when they fought, grabbing each others hair and all. I didnt know what was wrong, but i ended up going to the nurse and spending a full 2 hours in there, due to heat flashing, headaches, and a high fever. After that day I didnt push what i was feeling away, I accessed what the feelings were. They were a mix of practically everything. After that day at school I became more irritable around people, I wanted to get away from them but I felt as if something was drawing me in. I felt like I NEEDED to be around them. That was when I started being less social. I didnt talk to my friends, I didnt talk to my family, I spent days at a time just in my room playing video games or something to occupy my mind. That was when I found out what happened to me. After isolating myself I started getting frequent headaches and heat flashes, I would sleep for 8 hours a day but feel like I only slept 2, and it would show too. I had bags under my eyes and my face was a weird shade of pale, I have ivory skin and its normally very pretty but this just looked like i was lifeless. I wanted to talk to someone about this, what I was feeling, I talked to my mom, the only person I could talk to. What she explained to me was mindblowing, and at first i didnt believe it, and then things started adding up. Heres what she told me : I didnt want this to get passed onto you, but i cant control any of that. On my side of the family were a bit different. Many people dont believe in ghosts or spirits and stuff, but thats a story for another day, im using ghosts as an example. In order to communicate or do something that we can see and hear, they need energy. We are alot like them in many ways, because we need energy to stay physically and mentally healthy, we are a bit more connected to the spirtual world then most people are. (I told her about craving to be around people) The reason why you crave and feel the need to be around people is because your actually feeding off of their energy, you need it to stay healthy and your brain is sending signals making you want to be around people, you can control what and when you feed on something but that takes practice. Your a bit more different with different abilities and in time youll find out what those abilities are. A week after she told me i began practicing to control what i feed on, i have established the feelings i have when I feed, thus being able to know when im doing it. The reason why im writing this though is because I am scared, yesterday my friend and I got into a fight, she made me really angry and all I did was just glare at her and she got this look in her face, like she was scared of me or something, she told me to calm down and then she moved seats away from me. I didnt know what had happened, we normally got into fights because were two very different people, and i always glare to let her know to just drop it, but this time she just seemed scared of me. After the bell rang I was leaving the room for lunch, in the classrooms we have those really heavy wooden doors that you have to shove to open, and they slowly close behind you, for the three years ive been here in high school i always have to shove those stupid doors open, i never was a strong person, but today when i opened the door or threw it open should i say, the door swung open and hit the wall with this huge bang, there was a dent in the wall and the teacher lectured me about it but thats not the point. Everyone was staring at me, those doors are HARD to move, you have to at least shove it open, and i didnt even TRY to fling it open, i just opened it like normal. I can now lift 190 pounds without struggle now and i havent excerised in months. When i get angry i get VERY VERY angry, its like all my emotions are heightned. And im afraid one day someones gonna push me over the edge and im gonna hurt someone. Ive told my mom but she said she didnt know what i was talking about, she said that she meant mental abilities not physical abilities. We went to the doctor to see if he had any explanation about my newfound strength, did blood tests and this and that, and i had a couple of other tests done on me, he said that my immune system has strengthened greatly but other than that he didnt know why i could all of a sudden lift 190 pounds without a problem. Im done explaining but let me tell you what i was like before all this happened. I was a sweet friendly person who almost rarely got annoyed. Now I get angry very quickly and i can be very sarcastic and very imitidating. I dont like the person Im becoming but i cant help it, i need to know if anyone else is having this problem, if your somewhat like me. Dont take this as joke please, im serious.
What I know about myself: I can feel other peoples emotions if their strong enough, i feed on other peoples energy to stay healthy physically and mentally. I have a newfound strength that I never had and I can intimidate people without even wanting to. I get attached to people too easily. All my emotions are heightned. I find it very easy to do aerokensis when other people have to have years of practice. (I have video proof) I have A negative blood (moms side of the family has it)
If you have any of these traits PLEASE message me, i need someone else other than my family to talk to this about, they dont get that im afraid im gonna hurt someone, they say i can control it but i really cant.