My first Kagome fic. Based on the episode where Kagome finds Inuyasha and Kikyo in the forest. enjoy

Chapter 1:

I sat on my bed, my knees hugged tightly to my chest as I stared absentmindedly out the window. Blinking slowly, I stared up at the pristine white moon hanging on the dark blanket of sky. It was too white. Too pure. The color reminded me of something I was trying not to think about right now. Yet the more I tried to push the thought away, the more my heart ached. Was I really so stupid to do that to myself?

I watched as the moon contorted in the sky, becoming a long, flowing collection of hair. The sky around it turning into a pale face, with bright, penetrating yellow eyes. The eyes turned to me slowly as Inuyasha's voice rang in my head.

"Kagome". He whispered, his voice raising on the last letters of my name.

I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing his face from my mind. I would not allow him to have my thoughts, not now..

It was no use. As much as I tried, I couldn't keep myself from thinking of him. One of the draw backs of being in love. Shaking my head, I listened to the shuffling outside of my door.

I knew it had to be either grandpa, or mom, or perhaps Souta, debating on whether or not to open the door to check on me. I grimaced at the thought.

I didn't want to face the world, I just wanted nothing more than to fall into an endless sleep. But that was silly to think, my life wasn't over, just the life I longed for the most. The life with Inuyasha.

The thought tore at my chest, trying to create another gaping hole other than the one already left by the man himself.

I closed my eyes imagining a better time, before I even knew of Kikyo.

It was a short time, yet it was the best time of my life. But who was I kidding? Inuyasha only saw Kikyo when he looked at me, even now. That's why he usually looked away from me after seeing Kikyo. I reminded him too much of his former love.

Yet this time, when I expected him to turn his head, he didn't. He just stared at me solemly, his yellow eyes ripping away at my soul. I think I would have preferred his talons tearing at me than those amazing eyes.

I felt tears welling in my eyes once more as I rose to my feet.

I would have to face him now or later. Though I'd prefer later, I knew it had to be now.

I paused, watching the door carefully, my ears tuned to the sounds of my family members. When no sound came, I crept forward, my hand shakily closing around the door knob.

I drew it back quickly, hurrying down the stairs in an attempt to avoid them just in case they were awake.

I doubted it. It would be nearly morning, most likely what I heard earlier was grandpa walking to the bathroom. I ran outside, my eyes turning up the sky that was now fading into a bluish, yellow. As I walked silently toward the shed with the well, I felt my heart drop further into my chest.

It was very random, but something in my mind clicked and I remembered a song I'd heard a while back. It came up suddenly into my consciousness, but the words are what echoed inside my soul. They were so perfect to what I was feeling, it was eeiry.

We're driving slow through the snow on fifth avenue.

And right now radio is all that we can hear.

We aint talked since we left it's so overdue.

It's cold outside but between us it's worse in here.

I hurried to the doors of the shed, throwing them open roughly as I looked down at the well. Climbing the stairs slowly, I kept my eyes trained ahead of me.

I felt my anger beginning to build as the memory of mine and Inuyasha's last moment together flashed.

He stood silently staring at me, his eyebrows pulled down in an appologetic expression. He whispered my name, and didn't take his eyes off of mine.

"Dammit". I heard myself mutter, my fists slamming on the edge of the well. "I wish.. I wish Kikyo were dead"! I whispered bitterly as my eyes snapped open.

What was wrong with me? I was cursing someone I barely knew. Wishing she were dead. I must truly be a monster. I felt a tear drop from my eye landing softly on the top of my hand. I stared down at it silently as I lifted myself onto the edge of the well.

The world slows down, and my heart beats fast right now.

I know this is the part where the end starts.

I threw myself into the well, falling soundlessly in a flash of purple light.

Everything around me slowed as I fell, and I felt all my anger and resentment leave my body. Lingering on my side of the well.

As I landed on the floor of the well in the feudal era, I turned my attention toward the sky.

It was bright out, mid morning I'd assume.

I climbed weakly up the side of the well, my hands finding the familiar holes in the rocks. This was certainly an easier task when Inuyasha was with me. The name stung my nervous system like a deadly poison.

I needed to will myself to now say his name. It was just too painful.

I climbed out from the well, the bright sunlight hit my face instantly. For a moment I hung on the edge of the well, my legs dangling loosely below me.

Perhaps I wasn't strong enough to do this. I glanced backward, debating whether I should fall back into the well and not return to this time. No.. I had to do this..

I climbed onto the edge, my eyes catching sight of several birds sitting a few feet away. I waited nervously as my feet touched the grass, expecting Inuyasha to catch my scent the moment I touched the ground.

I stared blankly ahead of me, the words of the song still ringing out in the back of my mind.

I cant take it any longer, thought that we were stronger.

All we do is linger. Slipping through my fingers.

I dont wanna try now, all that's lefts goodbye,

to find a way that I can tell you.

I hate this part right here, I hate this part right here.

I just cant take your tears, I hate this part right here.

I clenched my hands in weak fists at my side.

Everything was so quiet. The forest around me was silent, as if all the creatures veered away from me, hiding in the distance.

I fell into my thoughts, staring down at my feet as the wind blew across me.

Everything happened so suddenly. Everything we had been through was shattred in an instant.

I guess it was partially my fault. What was I expecting to find in the forest when I followed Kikyo's soul collectors? Certainly not Inuyasha. But maybe part of me did. And that is what kept my feet moving through the forest, nearer and nearer to them.

I let out a sigh, feeling the air escape my lungs smoothly. This was all so hard.

For Inuyasha it would be easy, I could read it in his eyes. He was going to choose Kikyo. He was going to abandon me..

I felt tears welling in my eyes as I shook my head. As much as I didn't want to believe it, I knew it was true.

I waited anxiously for him to arrive. As I expected him to come strolling out of the trees, he did not. Would he not even honor me with a final goodbye?

The thought ripped at my heart.

Everyday, seven takes of the same old scene.

Seems we're bound by the laws of the same routine.

Gotta talk to you now before we got to sleep.

But will we sleep once I tell you it's hurting me?

What would I say to him? What COULD I say to him? Could I beg him to stay with me even though his heart longed to be with Kikyo? Could my heart really endure such a thing? So many questions, yet so few answers.

I knew I was undoubtably in love with him. Why else would I be here? Why would I shed so many tears yet still force myself to be at his side?

Maybe it would be best if I weren't. If I just stayed in my time like I should have this whole time.

The world slows down, and my heart beats fast right now.

I know this is the part where the end starts.

I shook my head. There is no way I could do that. To forget everything and go back to my modern day life as if nothing happened. I was simply fooling myself to think otherwise.

There is no way I could wipe his face from my mind. I knew my heart will always long for him, no matter how much time had passed.

I had to find a way to keep him with me. As selfish as it was, I didn't know any other way.

I suppose if Inuyasha really insisted on going with Kikyo I couldn't stop him. There is nothing that I could do to make him stay.

I looked up slowly at the leaves crackling in the trees. My eyes fell a little ways down, and my heart plummeted.

Inuyasha stood in the break in the trees, his eyes wide and hair furling in the breeze.

I felt myself shifting inside, as is something were pulling me toward him. I squeezed my hands on the wood, trying to keep myself seated rather than running into his arms like my heart so desperately wanted to.

He was silent, his expression softening as his eyes focused on me.

I felt my heart quicken as the wind blew across my face.

I know you'll ask me to hold on,

And carry on like nothings wrong.

But there is no more time for lies, Cause I see sunset in your eyes.

I watched him, expecting him to say something. Nothing came from him, just a cool, lingering gaze.

I turned away from him, trying to stop the blush from creeping up on my cheeks. I didn't want him to see my like this. I wanted to throw myself back into the well. Hopefully I would hit my head on the bottom and my suffering would end.

Shaking my head, I smiled weakly at the ground.

Such morbid thoughts. Is this what Inuyasha had really done to me? Make me so passionately in love with him that I'd rather be dead than live without him?

I cant take it any longer, thought that we were stronger.

All we do is linger. Just slipping through my fingers.

I dont wanna try now, all that's lefts goodbye

to find a way that I can tell you.

I bit down on my lip, my eyes turning weakly to Inuyasha. I had to do this now. Even if it destroyed me.

I met his eyes as hard as it was for me. Breathing deeply, I took in his entire image for a moment. It would probably be the last time I'd see him this way.

He looked so angelic, so pure. I knew now there was no more denying it. I was in love with him and I couldn't live without him. I needed to be with him, even if it wasn't the same for him as it was for me. I needed his presence in my life.

I loved Inuyasha.

I gotta do this. I gotta to it, I gotta do it..

I hate this part, I gotta do it. I gotta do it. I gotta do it...

I hate this part right here. I just cant take these tears, I hate this part right here..

I felt my heart quicken rapidly, so much so, I had to put my hand on my chest to make sure it didn't explode.

I had to do this. I had to get it over with. He had to know how I felt no matter how hard it was for me to vocalize. I opened my mouth yet no words came out. Shutting it tightly, I breathed again, collecting what little strength and resolve I had in me.

Meeting his eyes again for a final time, I let a soft whimper escape my lips.

"Inuyasha". I whispered as his ears pricked up.

It was now or never. He was here, he was listening. I had to do this. This had to be the moment when I told him I loved him and would stay with him even if he loved Kikyo. I needed to be with him.. No matter what..

Chapter 2:

"I went back to the present and thought it over. You and Kikyo and Me." I whispered finding the words easier to say than I imagined. I stared at my feet, not wanting to meet those amber eyes.

"Kagome I'm so.." He began as he raised his hand.

"It's okay". I said quickly turning my head away, facing myself away from him. " I understand how you feel and because of that, I convinced myself that I couldn't stay here with you."

"Kagome.. Until I met you. I never trusted a soul". I saw Inuyasha flexing his hand out of the corner of my eye. " But I watched you shed tears for my sake. You always stayed by my side. Whenever I'm with you I feel so peaceful and happy.."

I turned back to him slowly, looking at his pained expression..

"But I.. I'm not supposed to be happy, Kikyo.." I watched him look down. Obviously he was thinking about Kikyo dying for him."Kikyo came after me and lost her life it's only right that I repay her with my own life.."

I nodded slowly, turning my eyes away again. "I cant compete with Kikyo..Because after all.. Im still alive." A weak smile crawling up my lips.

I felt my legs beginning to tremble. This was far too difficult. I wanted to run so badly. But I knew I couldn't. I put my hands out behind me as I fell back onto the well.

"I've given alot of thought about this.. Kikyo. She and I are completely different.. Theres been all this talk that I am a reincarnation of her. Even if that's true I'm still not Kikyo..You see, my heart belongs to me." I blurted out, the words coming so naturally. I guess that's because I wanted to say it for so long. To say that Im NOT like Kikyo.. I will never BE Kikyo..

I felt him watching me even though my eyes were turned away. "Heres the thing, I do understand one feeling that Kikyo has..". I whispered to the ground. "Something that we share.. We're alike in our desire to be with you again." I felt the vice grip on my heart release. I breathed more easily after that. The words were finally spoke. I stared off toward the grass, my mind beginning to wander. "Strange you know..The moment it hit me, that Kikyo and I were connected by this desire to be with you, I felt a little bit better." I whispered slowly, still feeling his eyes on my face. "The desire to be with you gives us a common bond. That's how I was able to summon up the courage to come and see you.." The wind blew over us, taking my hair off my shoulders into the air. I could smell Inuyasha's scent wafting through the air toward me. I could almost faint. "I want to be here with you, Inuyasha. I tried to forget you but I can't.." I turned back to him. " Inuyasha...May I ask you a simple question?" I pushed myself to my feet, feeling my body lift gracefully from the edge of the well. It felt so much lighter now that Inuyasha knew how I felt.. That the secret was no longer a weight on my heart.

I walked carefully toward him, my eyes on his perfect amber ones as they followed me. "Inuyasha, will you let me stay"? I watched his ears prick and his brows furrow.

"So.. You'll stay with me"? He whispered looking down.

"Um hmm." That was the only thing I could muster. I was too caught up with the look in his eyes. Such sadness. How badly I wanted to wipe that sadness away.

I can never break the bond between Inuyasha and Kikyo.. I understand that...But theres another thing I've come to realize, Inuyasha.. Finding you was no coincidence.. It was more than that.. Deep down you must know that I want you to live..

"Kagome"..

"Well then". I looked up at him, the silence becoming more than I could take. Reaching out, I took his hand firmly in my own. "Lets go".

We walked through the trees, the light hitting us between the leaves. It was silent the entire time, Inuyasha just looking at the ground. I felt his hand close tighter around mine, squeezing my fingers together. I couldn't help but smile.

I want you to be happy, I want you to laugh alot , I dont know what exactly I'll be able to do for you..

I looked up at Inuyasha just as his head was turning toward me. We stared at each other as the wind swept over us. In his eyes, I saw peace, happiness. His gaze lingered on me, and I continued staring at him. I knew he wasn't seeing Kikyo.. No.. Not this time.. He saw me, and me alone.. I smiled as his hair brushed across my cheek.

But I'll always be by your side..

****************THE END******* (smiles)