Reunion
- Ten years had passed since they had last seen each other. Can time heal old wounds or is it better to leave things in the past?
Grimmjow stood in the large room amongst his fellow classmates. It was strange to be stood in this hall again after so many years, amongst people he hadn't seen since graduation. With a sigh of relief he spotted his old friend Ulquiorra making his way towards him.
"You look well." The man commented upon reaching him, taking in Grimmjow's expensive attire and golden wristwatch with a raised eyebrow. "I take it Tokyo has been good to you."
"You could say that." Grimmjow sighed and looked down at the plastic cup he was holding in distaste. "What the hell is this stuff anyway?"
"As if I'd know, I wouldn't drink that if my life depended on it." Ulquiorra threw the cup a disdainful glance. "I wasn't expecting you to turn up. Weren't your words something like 'never returning to this crap-hole again'?"
"Yes well, who am I to pass up on our ten year reunion?"
"If you ask me you're better off away from this place. Go back to Tokyo, at least there you've made a name for yourself." Ulquiorra looked up when Grimmjow didn't respond to see he was looking around the room. "He's not here yet." As predicted, Grimmjow stiffened at the words momentarily before raising an eyebrow.
"Who?"
"Don't be stupid, I know why you're here. I'm telling you, you're wasting your time. I never understood your interest in the boy and I still don't." Shaking his head, they both turned as a shout echoed across the room.
It came from the red-headed man Renji, he was always a loud-mouthed, energetic and cocky little boy. Always caused trouble and grief for the teachers at school. But this wasn't why Grimmjow remembered him, it was because he was the best friend of Ichigo Kurosaki. This was the cause of Renji's sudden outburst as he ran across the room and launched himself at a smaller, orange-haired male.
Even from across the hall, Grimmjow could see the years had benefited Ichigo greatly. He was no longer a lanky teenage boy, he had filled out his frame and by the look of it, finally gotten rid of his glasses in favour for contacts. Grimmjow had tried many times to get Ichigo to do this, but the boy had always been adamant about his glasses, despite their geeky nature.
Of course, he had always been partial about Ichigo's rich brown eyes, they reminded him of warmth, of affection, of better days spent at a lakes edge, nights spent together alone. "Why don't you go and talk to him." Grimmjow was brought out of his reverie by the question. Ulquiorra jerked his head at the two men who were now chatting amicably.
"And why would I do that? Besides, there's nothing left to say."
"Ah yes, well you did leave in such a rush. I doubt you explained yourself did you?" Grimmjow chose not to reply, but Ulquiorra already knew the answer. "Do you ever learn?"
"Oh give it a rest, I get it alright. Besides, I doubt he's got the time of day for me anymore."
"I don't know about that…" Ulquiorra started, glancing at someone behind Grimmjow and nodded. "He's been single since you left."
"And how do you know this?"
"I'm married to Orihime, they're friends. She often talks about him, she worries for him because he his alone." He raised an eyebrow as Grimmjow choked on his drink. Holding up his hand he showed his old friend the ring. "Sometimes you've got to follow your heart. You may have money and everything you've ever dreamed of, but is it worth it when you spend your nights alone?"
Grimmjow frowned, but chose again not to answer. Ulquiorra had an annoying habit of knowing exactly what he was thinking and always managed to strike a nerve. Yes it was true there was no denying that. No matter who he was with, no matter how he tried, there was no-one who could fill that gap left by Ichigo. Yet he was the one who left ten years ago, he was the one who broke Ichigo's heart so he had no right to talk to the man now.
"I have to go, Orihime's calling me." Ulquiorra nodded behind him again and Grimmjow turned to see the woman waving at them exuberantly. "Good to see you again Grimmjow. I take it you won't be coming back?"
"Nothing to come back to, it was good to see you too."
As Ulquiorra left, Grimmjow started around the room. He wanted to leave quietly without being noticed. None of these people interested him, he had no ties left here. It was stupid coming back, hoping to catch a glance of Ichigo and he had, now it was time to leave. Slipping through the doors, Grimmjow let out a deep sigh, his shoulders relaxing.
Karakura was never really his home, his parents had abandoned him as a child, and he'd grown up in the local foster home. School was always a nightmare, no-one showed any inkling of respect, or friendship towards him, he was always an outcast. Then high school started and Grimmjow figured it would be the same. And then he met Ichigo.
The orange head had taken a liking to him and despite Grimmjow's many rebuffs, he had stuck around. Their friendship grew and it changed, they became something more. Yet Grimmjow always knew Ichigo was too good for him, how could he possibly deserve someone such as Ichigo. He had no money, no job, no-one would hire him and his grades were poor. Ichigo on the other hand came from a well-respected family, he excelled at school and was accepted into the top university in Japan.
Yet he was going to give it up, he'd told Grimmjow so at graduation, he would give up his future, his career, to stay with him. Grimmjow would be a liar to say he didn't want Ichigo to stay with him, but he couldn't do it, he couldn't damn Ichigo like that when he had such a bright future, he would move on, find someone better, he would forget about him.
So he left, leaving for Tokyo. Leaving Ichigo behind broken-hearted and although he regretted the decision, that didn't mean it wasn't the right one. He had no right to come back after ten years and seek friendship with Ichigo when he knew it was far more than friendship he desired.
"Grimmjow!" He halted at the bottom of the steps leading into the school, closing his eyes. So much for a quiet getaway. Turning around, he felt an odd reaction of his heart both rising and sinking when he saw Ichigo running down the steps to catch up to him. "Hey." He grinned upon reaching him, coming to a stop at his side.
"What?" Grimmjow asked sharply, more so than he intended as he felt a pang of guilt when Ichigo flinched, his grin fading. Up close he could see Ichigo hadn't changed that much, he still had freckles splashed across his nose and cheeks, his hair was still as messy as ever, hell he even had the same crease between his eyebrows when he frowned. "Look I have to go so make it quick."
"Is that it?" Ichigo asked in disbelief, stepping closer to him but Grimmjow remained still, the only reaction given was his jaw clenching. "That's all you have to say to me, make it quick?" Shaking his head, Ichigo let out a small, humourless laugh. "And here I thought you might have changed, my mistake. Whatever, just go then. Go back to your perfect life, I guess there's nothing for you here anymore huh?"
Ichigo turned, intending to back inside but Grimmjow grabbed his arm, unable to stop himself. "Ichi wait." It worked, he stilled at the old nickname, turning to face him again. There was no hint of a smile on his face anymore, if anything he looked wary. "I'm sorry."
"About what, being an asshole ten years ago, or being an asshole now?"
Grimmjow chuckled, relaxing his grip on the others arm. "Both I suppose."
Ichigo sighed, looking down at Grimmjow's hand. "I forgave you a long time ago. What's the point in being angry at you, when all you've ever done is let people down? I tried so hard for you, for us. Why did you leave?"
"You deserve better than me."
"That's bullshit." Ichigo ripped his arm free, a scowl forming on his face as he poked Grimmjow hard in the chest. "Don't give me that self-sacrificing shit! You left because that's what you wanted right? That's all you've ever wanted, you never liked it here. All you ever talked about was leaving Karakura, I was the only thing holding you back. Didn't take much to drop me did it."
He came to an abrupt halt, chest heaving and eyes bright. Ichigo had been waiting a long time to say this, who was Grimmjow to deny him. Ichigo deserved to yell at him, to shout and to scream, hell if he wanted to punch him Grimmjow wouldn't blame him.
"I would've given up everything for you, and you threw it back in my face and left. Do you have any idea how long it took me to get over you? Because I sure as hell don't and I thought I was, until I saw you today." He stopped again and shook his head, Grimmjow felt another pang of his heart when tears fell down Ichigo's cheeks. "I want to hate you, but I can't stop loving you. Does that make me a fool?"
Grimmjow shook his head, reaching up slowly to wipe the tears away. "No, it makes me a fool for ever leaving you. I really am sorry Ichigo, you deserve so much better than me. But I can't stop loving you either, I've never stopped thinking about you, even for a day. I can't get you out of my head, no matter how hard I try. How could I resist coming back today, just to catch a glimpse of you? Surely that's enough?"
He shook his head, wiping his face quickly and cleared his throat. "It's not enough." Ichigo replied firmly and he grabbed Grimmjow's hand, pulling him away from the school. "Come on, I doubt anyone will miss us."
Ichigo took him back to his apartment, Grimmjow couldn't have stopped himself even if he wanted to. He'd come back just to see Ichigo, to make sure he was ok and yet, whatever Ichigo had planned was far more than he'd hoped for. As he was lead into the apartment Grimmjow looked around, it was small, but Ichigo had made it comfortable. He had shoved several chairs into the room, it seemed he had company a lot of the time. Grimmjow spotted a white coat hanging on the wall next to the door and smiled.
"You did it then?" He touched the coat when Ichigo turned to look at him questioningly. "Went to Uni, became a doctor?"
"Yeah, since there wasn't anything here, I went to University. I work at the local hospital." Ichigo paused, looking at Grimmjow with a thoughtful expression. "Would you think less of me if I took you into my bedroom and we had sex?"
Grimmjow swallowed as a lump appeared in his throat. Was Ichigo being serious? "No." He replied quietly, cupping Ichigo's face and he smiled, leaning into the touch. "Because that's what I want too." Ichigo grabbed his hand and with a meaningful look, led Grimmjow into the adjacent room.
It was unlike anything Grimmjow could remember, either his memory wasn't what it used to be, or he'd forgotten just how good it felt to be with Ichigo. To have the man underneath him again, face flushed and eyes shut tight, his name falling from Ichigo's lips in heated moans. To feel their bodies pressing together again after so many years, there was no comparison to anything he'd ever experienced.
It was over too quickly, of course it could have lasted forever and it would still be over too soon. Ichigo sat up after a while and sighed, hugging his knees, there was an odd expression of his face, he shouldn't look like that. Grimmjow frowned, reaching out to brush Ichigo's hair back to expose more of his face, his hand stilling when Ichigo turned to face him. Was that regret in his eyes?
"Ichigo?" Shaking his head, Ichigo closed his eyes and jerked his head free. He was crying again. "Hey, what's wrong?" Trying again to touch him, he was surprised to find his hands pushed away. "Ichi…"
"Go." Grimmjow frowned, he didn't understand. "Go!" Ichigo yelled, giving him a shove as more tears cascaded down his cheeks. "Just go…" Wiping his face Ichigo stood up, turning his back on Grimmjow. It was dark now, the street lights outside illuminating the outline of Ichigo's body. Grimmjow couldn't remember ever seeing something so beautiful, yet so heart-breaking at the same time as Ichigo's shoulders shook with silenced tears.
"What's wrong?" He persisted, standing as well and he cautiously approached Ichigo from behind. "Ichigo talk to me, please."
He turned, a small smile playing across his lips and he ran a hand through Grimmjow's hair before letting it drop to his side. "Go back to Tokyo Grimmjow, go back to your own life. There's nothing for you here."
"I don't-" Grimmjow frowned, grabbing Ichigo's shoulders. "I don't understand. Why? Why would you bring me back here, why would you sleep with me? Doesn't this mean anything to you?"
"Of course it does. This is the ending we should have had ten years ago." He pulled away again, backing away to put some distance between them. "It's closure Grimmjow, surely you knew that?"
"No! No I didn't, I thought… I thought you wanted to be with me. I thought this was the start of something Ichi." Ichigo was shaking his head and it dawned on Grimmjow. "You don't want to be with me do you?"
"I'm sorry."
Ichigo flinched when Grimmjow snorted. "Yeah well, so am I." Shaking his head, he turned from Ichigo and started pulling his clothes back on. "This is goodbye then, just as you wanted it. Don't expect to see me again."
"Grimmjow!" He ignored him, slamming the door open to return into the main room and started towards the front door. "Grimmjow please!" Ichigo was behind him and grabbed his arm as he opened the door, preventing his leave.
"I would have stayed." Grimmjow told him, keeping his voice low to hide the shake in it. Ichigo had given him hope and then stripped it away so quickly that he still felt disorientated. "If you asked I would have stayed with you. But since you don't want me I'll go. You got what you wanted."
"I love you!" Ichigo cried as Grimmjow wrenched his arm free and left into the hallway. He stopped again and turned to the orange head. "I love you." He repeated in a whisper.
"I would've said the same ten minutes ago, but not now. Goodbye Ichigo." He left, but the image of Ichigo in tears, still naked and bearing the marks of their recent encounter was burned into his mind. He would never forget that image, his last memory of Ichigo in tears again, all because of him.
There was nothing left in Karakura now, nothing to tie him to this wretched place and as far as he was concerned, the sooner he left the better. The thought that one good thing remained here, Grimmjow's one good memory was gone, and Ichigo had broken him, just as he had done ten years ago. Karma really was a bitch.
All he'd wanted to do was get one look at Ichigo, just one last time. Instead he got everything and for a fleeting moment, he believed he could have Ichigo again, make everything alright. More fool him for believing that, some things are just too good to be true. Grimmjow paid for the next flight to Tokyo, he would never come back. He meant what he'd said to Ichigo, it was goodbye forever this time.
The flight was an hour away yet so he had another torturous hour to wait. He sat drumming his fingers against his knee, watching the large clock on the wall which was moving at an extremely slow pace. Try as he might however, he couldn't stop thinking about Ichigo, his body underneath his own. Every moan, every whisper of his name filled his head.
The plane arrived and with only a slight hesitation, his thoughts of Ichigo, did Grimmjow board the plane to leave Karakura forever.
…
*Two Months Later*
Grimmjow cursed himself for the twenty-something time as he held the cloth pressed down on his arm. How could he have been so stupid? Honestly it was the most stupid thing he'd ever done. He was getting out of the shower when he slipped, somehow managing to smash the glass door and slice his arm open. He was now sat in the hospital, still cursing his stupidity as he waited to be seen.
"Mr Jaeggerjaques?" He looked up as a nurse approached him and nodded. "Follow me, Doctor Kurosaki will see you now."
Grimmjow stood up to follow her, halting momentarily when her words processed. "Doctor Kurosaki?" He asked and she giggled, turning to give him a meaningful look as she showed him into a room.
"Yes he's a new transfer, arrived a week ago. But don't worry, he's very good." She assured him before leaving.
Grimmjow almost followed after her, almost demanded a new doctor. Surely she didn't mean… No, there must be another Kurosaki in Tokyo. Why would Ichigo be here? The door opened and to his complete bewilderment, Ichigo walked in. He paused as their eyes met and for a few moments, they stood staring at each other.
"W-what?"
Ichigo smiled and approached him. "Do you mind?" He indicated at Grimmjow's arm and he held it out wordlessly. As Ichigo started examining the cut, Grimmjow was more interested in his face. Ichigo hadn't been sleeping that was obvious, he had dark shadows under his eyes and his skin had lost its natural colour, he was too pale. "So uh, how did you do it?" Ichigo asked, trying and failing to keep the amusement out of his voice as he began picking glass out of the wound.
"Slipped and smashed the shower door." Ichigo snorted, but said nothing else and they fell into silence as Ichigo stitched the cut and bandaged it. "Why are you here?" He finally asked, flexing his arm.
Ichigo sighed, his fingers lingering on Grimmjow's bicep for a moment before he quickly removed them. "I wanted to apologise to you. I acted like a jerk, and asshole or whatever else you want to call me. I didn't mean for things to happen like that. It's just…" He stopped and shook his head. "I got so scared, back at mine. You were there with me and I couldn't bear the thought of you leaving me again. So I forced you to leave, so it was on my terms not yours." Before Grimmjow could react Ichigo had grabbed his face and crushed their lips together. "Please forgive me."
Grimmjow smiled, nodding against Ichigo's face. "Only if you forgive me."
"I did a long time ago." Ichigo kissed him again, pushing him back onto the bed before climbing up on top of him. "There was a transfer open here, I took it without thought. I couldn't leave things the way they were between us. I love you and I always will, I came to tell you that."
Grimmjow ran a hand through Ichigo's hair, a grin on his face now. A weight that had settled in his stomach since their reunion two months ago was gone. Everything was going to be alright. "I love you too. But I have one more condition." Ichigo raised an eyebrow. "Move in with me, there's more than enough room, that's if you don't want to share mine."
"Do you even need to ask?" Ichigo hugged him tightly. "Of course I will, but my shift doesn't end for another four hours yet."
"So I will go home and start making room. I'll come and pick you up when you're done." Grimmjow sat up, kissing him again. "I promise this time, I will never leave you. I can give you the love you deserve now."
"Idiot, you always did." Ichigo ran a thumb over his cheek with a soft smile. "I understand why you left now. We aren't kids any more though, we can make this work." He cleared his throat and stood up, pulling Grimmjow to his feet. "Don't be late tonight."
"Four hours and I'll be back, promise." Another kiss and he left Ichigo to return to his work. As he left the hospital, he smiled for what felt like the first time in over ten years. Everything was going to be alright now, after all, he had Ichigo.