She had a routine now.

Every morning she would wake up and go for a run. She'd go five miles nonstop and then go home, take a shower, and head on to breakfast. Every Monday she had scrambled eggs. She made it in a special way so it tasted like it did when she ate it in the cafeteria at her old school. It gave her memories and she liked to remember the past.

After breakfast she would sit by the phone and write him a letter. She had a whole stack of these letters in a box on top of her dresser drawer. Soon she would need a new box. This one was almost all full.

After writing the letter she would seal it in an envelope, address it, and then put it inside her box instead of mailing it. Then she would sit at the computer and type up an e-mail, save it, and not click the send button.

She lived by herself now. After she had graduated from Pacific Coast Academy, she had moved out of her parent's house and moved into an apartment, living on the seventh floor of the thirty floor building. It often got lonely eating by herself, watching TV by herself… she had lost contact with her friends and rarely spoke to anyone. She had not expected to live like this, but that was how it went.

The morning of July 1, Zoey Brooks woke up and checked the calendar. It was a Monday. She often had trouble keeping track of the days since nothing special marked each one. After brushing her teeth, she set out for a run. She ran along the sidewalk, keeping her breath in check. Her feet pounded on the pavement. She passed by the pizza place, the old corner store, and several fire hydrants. By the time she got back to her apartment, she felt completely wiped out.

After a shower, she settled down by the phone to write her letter. She gnawed on the end of her pencil and tapped her fingernails against the table, making a clicking sound. Finally she began to write. Words started to form themselves and soon Zoey was writing at a rapid pace, her eyes glued to the paper. When the phone rang she was so startled that she dropped the pencil and nearly knocked the paper off the desk.

The phone rang again. Zoey just stared at it, unsure of what to do. The phone had not rung in many, many years. The last phone call that she had received had brought her terrible news. She gulped as the phone rang a third time. She reached over and picked up the receiver. Hand shaking, she brought it to her ear.

"Hello?"

A shrill squeal was heard on the other line. Zoey yanked the phone away from her ear, gasping a little in surprise. When the person on the other end had stopped screaming, Zoey pressed the phone against her ear again, hoping that the person would not shriek again.

"Hi, Zoey, it's me, Nicole!"

Zoey frowned slightly as she tried to remember who Nicole was. Was it that girl with the glasses who always did strange experiments? Or was it the girl who always had a messy bed? Was this Nicole even from PCA? It had been eight years since she had graduated and her memory was a bit foggy.

"Sorry," Zoey said, sounding apologetic. "I don't think I know a Nicole. Um… maybe this is a wrong number?"

"No, no, I'm positive this is right," Nicole said. "This is Zoey Brooks, right?"

"Uh… yes… well, yeah, that's me." Zoey felt stupid just saying the words.

"You seriously don't remember me? It's Nicole- Nicole Bristow! We were best friends at PCA!" Nicole was practically shouting. She sounded hurt and excited at the same time and she was breathing hard as if she had just run a marathon.

A faint image of a brown haired girl appeared in Zoey's mind. "Oh…" she said. "Now I remember. You were the one who liked boys and always blow dried your hair." She smiled a bit at the memory. "I remember now."

"Finally," Nicole said. She sounded very eager now. "So Zoey, how come you never answered the phone when I called you before? I mean, I must have called you a million times, but you never answered."

"Oh sorry," Zoey mumbled. "I… guess I never heard it ring." She scolded herself for her unbelievable lie. How could she never hear it ring? The truth was she hadn't answered the phone because she didn't want to talk to anyone. At first the phone had rung off the hook, but gradually they stopped. After a year they stopped all together. When the doorbell rang, Zoey didn't answer it. Instead she ignored it or pretended she wasn't home.

"So what did you have for breakfast today?" Nicole asked cheerfully.

Zoey was dumbfounded. Then she remembered that the year before they graduated, Zoey and Nicole had always asked each other what they had had for breakfast and recorded it down in a notebook. It had no real purpose, but it was something they had done for fun.

"Scrambled eggs," Zoey recalled. "I made it like they made it at the cafeteria in PCA."

"You remember the scrambled eggs, but you don't remember your best friend?" Nicole said sounding slightly offended, but also a bit confused.

Zoey didn't know what to say. It was true that she had erased all memories that had scarred her and only kept a few scraps that were good, pleasant, and had done nothing to hurt her in any way. Her friends were precious to her while she had them, but after they stopped going to school together, she felt as if seeing them would just bring back terrible memories.

"Anyways, I bet you're wondering why I called you after seven years," Nicole said, quickly dropping the subject on the scramble eggs.

"Oh… right…" Zoey mumbled. She was starting to regret answering the phone in the first place. She hadn't done it in years so why had she now? She wasn't sure. She figured it was the shock of hearing the loud ringing sound in so long.

"Well?" Nicole prompted. "Guess!"

Zoey sighed heavily, not sure of what to say. "I don't know."

There was a pause and then Nicole finally gave in. "Okay, okay, I'll tell you," she said. "Dana called me yesterday and said that we should have a little get-together. You know all us PCA friends. The whole gang! We're going to have it at my place tomorrow night. Can you make it?"

Zoey felt something inside her stomach churn. Tears sprang into her eyes, but she quickly brushed them away. Her throat was tightening and she didn't want to start sobbing on the phone. Thoughts started to drift into her head and she felt like her brain was going to explode.

It had happened a month before they were going to graduate. Zoey had been cheerfully getting the phone numbers and addresses of everyone she knew so she could contact them after they left PCA. As she was getting Mark's e-mail, Michael had rushed up to her, shaking like mad.

"Michael, what's the matter?" Zoey had asked, looking concerned.

"It's… it's Chase," Michael said. She realized his face was tear stained and his eyes bloodshot. She grabbed a chair and seated Michael in it to calm him down.

"What about Chase?" she asked, frowning. She hoped Chase didn't fall into the newly planted rose bush. She remembered the last one he had fallen in. He had gotten a lot of cuts and scratches from the thorns and had also gotten in trouble from the dean for ruining the roses.

"He was going …" Michael was shaking uncontrollably now. Zoey started to get scared. Fear was creeping up on her like a monster under the bed. She stared straight into Michael's eyes.

"What's wrong with Chase?"

"His parents came," Michael mumbled his head in his hands. "His parents came to visit and they took Chase for a drive. They were on their way to go see a movie together… you know, a nice family thing to do. But then…"

"But then…"

"There was a crash," Michael said, his voice cracking. "There was a crash and Chase's parents…" He took a deep breath to steady himself. He looked straight at Zoey and said in a quiet voice, "They died."

Zoey's heart skipped a beat. She blinked back tears and felt her palms start to sweat. "Oh… no… that can't be true. Chase must be devastated."

Michael turned away. "He would have been."

Zoey froze. "What do you mean… he would have been? You mean he's not?" Her voice grew shrill. "Why… that's nonsense! I mean, how can he not be sad? I'd be… I'd be… so… upset… if my parents…" Her voice was slowing down. Michael didn't say anything. She desperately wished he would.

"Michael?" her voice was soft and questioning. "Michael? Tell me the truth. What happened to Chase? Where is he right now?"

When Michael didn't say anything Zoey started to shake him. "Tell me! I have a right to know. I've been his girlfriend for years and I think I-"

"He's gone," Michael murmured. Tears were running down his face like a waterfall. Zoey stared at him, her head numb. She didn't really hear the words he said. She felt her body start to shake.

"Gone?" she said. She smiled a twisted smile. "Yeah… sure… Gone where? Where would he have gone? He wouldn't have gone home. Not when we're just about to graduate."

"He didn't go home," Michael said. He glanced at Zoey. "You… you know what I mean, Zoey. Don't make this any harder than it already is."

"Me? Make things harder?" Zoey laughed. "I'm not making things harder. You shouldn't be the one talking. You just scared me so much… nice joke, Michael."

"It's not a joke!" Michael was yelling now. He was shaking with anger now. He stood up and grabbed Zoey's shoulders and shook her. "See the light, Zoey! He's gone."

"No…" Zoey giggled lightly. "I just saw him last night. We watched a movie together. Today… oh yeah, he did tell me his parents were coming… said he was going to catch a movie with them today. I wonder what they saw."

"Have you not been listening to me?" Michael asked, his voice shaking. "They're all… they're all…" People were staring at them now. Some wore shocked expressions and other's brows were furrowed as if they were wondering whether the two of them were practicing a scene from a play or not.

"No THEY AREN'T!" Zoey cried, growing angry. "Stop it, Michael! When I tell Chase you've been making stories up then… then…" She suddenly burst into tears and fell on the floor. "Then…. then… then…"

A hand was rested on her shoulder and she looked up, expecting to see Chase smiling at her. Instead she was looking up at Nicole's tear stained face. Her best friend helped her off the ground and gave her a hug.

"I'm sorry, Zoey," she said.

Zoey was trembling and shaking her head. "No… no…" she groaned. "He's not dead. No… he's not…" She was crying into Nicole's shoulder, feeling a terrible feeling in the pit of her stomach. The feeling made her want to throw up.

"Zoey…" Nicole said. "Zoey… Zoey… Zoey, are you there?"

Zoey snapped back to reality. She realized she was still on the phone with Nicole. She quickly shook her head, getting rid of the thoughts that were swirling around in her mind. "Hi… sorry… I was just… anyways. What were you saying?"

"Get-together," Nicole reminded her. "Can you make it? You remember where I live, right? Well, duh, I guess you wouldn't. You've never been to my new house, have you? Well I moved out two years after we graduated and-"

"You live pretty far away," Zoey said, interrupting her. "I don't think I'll make it. I don't have a car and I don't want to take the bus so far and…"

"No worries," Nicole said casually. "Dana and Logan live faraway too. Just ask them to give you a ride. They have to stop by where you live to get to where I live, right?"

Zoey sighed. "I don't want to bother them…"

Nicole laughed. "Are you kidding? They're dying to see you. They'll be happy to do you a favour." She sighed a little. "Remember when we went to PCA? We never used to be able to go to each others' houses because we lived so far away. But now we all live just an hour drive away from each other. How convenient is that? I mean, not just two of us, but all of us live in California. Isn't that great? I guess none of us really wanted to leave PCA so we just stayed in the same general area…"

Nicole was babbling. Zoey felt the need to interrupt. "Okay, Nicole, I'll go. But can you phone Dana and Logan for me?"

"Why don't you do it?" Nicole suggested. "They'd be happy to hear from you."

"No, I don't think so," Zoey said meekly. "Please, Nicole? I just feel… really tired right now. I think I'll take a nap." Actually, a nap was the last thing she wanted to do. She had already messed up her daily routine. She didn't want to screw it up even more.

"Okay then," Nicole said a little hesitantly. "So I'll see you tomorrow night at 7 PM. Dana and Logan know the way so you just stand outside your apartment by 6:30 tomorrow! Okay?"

"Sure," Zoey mumbled. "Bye." She quickly hung up before Nicole could say anything else. Her head was spinning as if she had just gone on a roller coaster. She was going to see everyone again. She was going to have to see them and remember the memories… All those memories…

"What did I just do?" Zoey said to herself, horrified. She looked down at the piece of paper she had been writing on. The letter was still there, written in pencil, but now there were tear stains over a few words. Zoey realized she had been crying. She laughed a little to herself and stood up to go wash her face. The letter on the table stayed where it was. On it, in neat printing, it read

Dear Chase,

Hey! What's up? I feel weird again. Of course, feeling weird is natural for me now. I've felt weird every since that day Michael told me you were gone. It's weird… you're the only person I even try to talk to. Even though I know that I'll never be able to send you these letters… I can't help but continue to write them. But I believe you're reading these from above... You are, right? Or am I just waiting valuable paper? Ha, ha… You know that I miss you, right? I mean… life… it's just not the same without you. Where are you when I most need you, Chase Matthews?

Okay well, this is the first chapter of the new series I'm writing. How do you like it? It's kind of different from the other stories I wrote which were mostly just happy stories with love, humour, and general stuff like that. This one is a bit more dramatic… Anyways, please review- And tell me if it made sense or not because I'm not sure if it did :S