Author's Note: I was feeling sad that a lot of people reacted so selfishly and unkindly to one of Dan's recent videos (Internet Support Group 9) when he had explicitly stated that he wasn't doing very well and so had made this video because it was what he needed to distract himself. I don't know if Dan was bothered by the compassionless phandom reaction, but it upset me, and so I wrote this little ficlet to comfort myself.
Needy
Phil knew the signs by now.
The tight line of Dan's mouth and the tension in his jaw spoke volumes to someone who knew him as well as Phil did. Something was bothering him. Maybe he'd gotten a call from his dad. Maybe he'd read some political article linked on Facebook. But no matter what it was, after this many years, Phil also knew him well enough to be certain that if he asked what was wrong at this stage, Dan would dismiss it with an obviously false, "Nothing."
"Cuddle?" Phil asked in a wheedling tone.
Dan sighed heavily, as if Phil was asking for some humongous favor, but obligingly set his laptop on the coffee table and let Phil enfold him into his arms, let Phil pull him down until they were spooning, let Phil swing a leg over his, let himself be wrapped in lanky limbs until he was surrounded by Phil's warmth on the sofa, Phil's soft breath teasing the hair on the back of his head.
They lay there quietly for a long minute, then Phil started humming Interrupted by Fireworks. Dan let him go on for a bit before interrupting to laugh, "You know that's barely recognizable, you're so out of tune." Phil giggled, unoffended.
They lay in silence again for a while before Phil said, "Remember Dewey the koala?"
The tension in Dan's body abated a bit as he let out an "Awwww" just remembering. "That's the best thing I've ever smelled!"
"Me too!"
A minute passed.
"And remember when I single-handedly saved the entire panda race with my one powerful wish in Japan?"
Dan was very, very, excruciatingly slowly relaxing within Phil's embrace. Like a glacier of tension melting over the course of centuries. "I know what you're doing," he groused quietly.
Phil gave him a whole-body squeeze and asked, "Is it working?"
"Maybe," Dan admitted sulkily.
Phil kissed the back of his head, then waited an appropriate amount of time before asking, "Remember when you walked all over Hong Kong trying to catch a Farfetch'd? After I caught one in the hotel room?"
Dan growled and swatted at Phil's arm playfully. "You know, I may actually play Pokémon Go one last time when we're there again in April, just to catch that damn thing. I don't think I can live with the ignominy of that particular defeat for the rest of my life."
His body was now soft and pliant in Phil's grasp, and they lay together for a long time without talking. Phil knew that if it was important, Dan would talk to him about whatever was bothering him when he was ready. And if it wasn't important, then an aggressive cuddle might just banish it entirely.
Knowing and loving someone this well was a gift, and he never took it for granted. He kissed the back of Dan's head again, very softly and gently, and just held him close.