We all changed after the war against Zeref. It had broken all of us. For some, like Erza, Gray and I, became lost afterwards. For Gray though, he has it easy, married to Juvia, happy. He no longer has a spark in his eyes sadly. Erza took the worst blow, her mother was her enemy, Jellal had died, and after Natsu, Erza broke. Erza lost everything, including her sanity. She sits alone, whispering to herself in the corner of the guild hall. I lost everything too, I lost my celestial friends, my right arm was slain off in an attempt to fight off the twelve man army, and I had tried to save Natsu. I saw him fade away into darkness. I lost my heart that day. We won the war, but we lost our happiness.
Levy and Gajeel sat at the bar, Gajeel cradling Levy in his arms. Levy had lost her healthy, glowing skin. Her once determined hazel eyes now lacked the lustre they once had. They were empty. It was obvious that Levy had not slept very well in months, the dark circles under her eyes being the evidence of sleepless nights. Gajeel was Levy's knight in shining armour, or Iron armour I should say. He was her shoulder to cry on. Things have been like this since the war ended.
I am currently in the guild library. I sometimes come here to just be alone. So no one can pity me and so I can freely cry. Now, though, I'm cleaning the library. Sorting through the piles of old, discarded magic council documents and books. It is very quiet. My eyes move up to glance at the numerous shelves that still need to be sorted. Sighing, I drag myself over to the plush chairs and collapse myself onto one. Why is life exhausting?
I finally give in and leave the library. I pass the bar, where an empty stool will probably stay empty for a long time. Cana had disappeared on a job with Gildarts, wanting to spend more time with her father. Gildarts was broken at first but he drags on through life like it was any other day. That's the most painful part. I wonder how Erza copes. I certainly can't. I don't have the will to lose myself in sadness. How could I? Fairy Tail is about friendship and Family.
'Family, Friendship? Huh? That philosophy drowned in our pain a while ago'. I spot Mirajane and join her at the counter. She knows what day it is and although I'm trying to take my mind off things she gives me a cup of sake. I gladly take the cup and down the contents, the liquid burns the back of my throat but I don't care to be honest. Placing the cup down I look up at Mirajane who sadly smiles at me.
"Hey Lucy, how have you been?" I'm happy that Mira is smiling, it takes away from the pain she's in.
"I'm well enough Mira, cleaning the library is my pass time. How about you?"
"I'm…" she pauses. "I'm not okay, but I am alright." She glances up to me.
"Then maybe we can drown our sorrows in sake together." We chuckle slightly before Mira's face darkens.
"You know what happens when we drink too much Lucy!" I lightly laugh.
"Mira, I'm not getting drunk anytime soon I can promise you that."
"Okay then. Lucy I best be going, Elfman and Evergreen are coming for dinner!"
"Oh, have fun then Mira." I walk out of the guild, waving to the others who sat nearby, which wasn't many. I definitely miss our glory days.
Walking home down Strawberry Street, I notice that the boatmen don't call out to me anymore. It's obviously visible that things have changed. My skin is paler, I probably have dark circles under my eyes and I'm skinnier. Not by choice of course, the nightmares that plagued me are the reason behind it. Enough about those, I dislike talking about them. Opening my apartment it feels empty. Has been for the past two years. The missing presence of Natsu and Happy makes me shiver. It is cold, pink and white. Clean too, everything a girl's room should look like. I turn around, pacing myself as I walk into the room. The room isn't cold, it's the presence of something cold. Creeping further into the room, I look at the bed. 'Nothing'. I turn to the table and I see it. The battered ancient book, covered in dust. Many wouldn't recognise it but I do. 'It was supposed to have faded with Zeref. It was meant to be particles of magic not still intact'. I walk toward towards my desk and look down the book. Wiping the thick layer of dust off the book I see three letters plastered on the cover. 'E.N.D, Etherious Natsu Dragneel. To think that Zeref not only made his own brother a demon but caused my mother's death too! No! Don't think like that Lucy! Without the eclipse gate you would never have even met the Dragon slayers. Gajeel, Wendy, Sting, Rogue. You would never have met Natsu!' I don't understand why this book is here and now but I'm going to save a few questions for master. If he were still here anyway. I'll hand it to the magic council, they might want to keep an eye on this book. 'Do I really want to though? It's my last connection to Natsu. But this book is dangerous.' I glance at the book and I work out what to do. I grab a pen, opening the cover, I write on the inside.
'Natsu, I never got to say I love you, instead I said goodbye.
I love you.'
I put the pen down and shut the book. I know he's gone. But two years ago today everything had changed. I can't say I'm proud of the changes that have happened. I know Natsu died two years ago today but I'm afraid. I'm afraid to believe it, despite seeing him die, I refuse to believe it. In fury, I grab a book bag, sling it over my shoulder and shove the book in there. I should treat the book with more respect, but at this point I don't really care. I rush back to the guild, pulling my coat on as I pass the door. I receive stares directed at me as I pass through the guild and back to the library. Slamming the door I shuffle over the plush chairs, I stumble onto the ground and lean against a chair. Letting the tears flow freely, the palms of my hands only slightly wet from the tears dripping from my eyes. 'Why did you have to die, Natsu!? Why did you leave me again just like you did four years ago!?'
I wake up on the floor of the library. It can't have been too long, I return to the guild hall and approach Levy. The girl turns to me and faintly smiles.
"Lu-Chan. Been a while, hasn't it?" I return her small smile. Then I remember why I want to talk to her.
"Levy, how have you been? We need to talk more."
"I'm… okay, especially with Gajeel by my side. What about you?" I grimace at the question before putting my hand on the book bag.
"Levy, what I have in my bag may startle you. I found it on my desk at home." I pull out the book and she moves back in shock.
"Lu, did you open the book? At all? H-how?!"
"Levy I opened the book, nothing showed up. If something did I wouldn't be standing here would I?" She glares at the book, tempted to pick it up. Levy shakes her head.
"Lucy, how did you get this book!?"
"Like I said before, it just showed up on my desk, I honestly have no idea how it got there or why?"
"Lu, something's not right. This book faded into particles of ethernano along with Zeref. Are you going to hand it to the magic council?"
"Yes, I was going to take a job on the way, I need some cash." Levy slides the book back into my hands.
"Lucy, I care for you. Be careful, okay. I don't want to lose another friend, I still need to read your novel you know." I lightly laugh.
"Levy, I promise. For now though, I'm going back to the library. I need to finish cleaning."
"Okay Lu-chan. I'm going home, see you." Levy walks off in the direction of the exit. I enter the library once more to finish the cleaning I was there for originally. This place is a mess.
Climbing up the ladder I place books in their correct order, one by one, as to not fall onto the ground below me. I let out a small cry as the ladder slightly wobbles. Sighing, I continue my mission across the library.
In the corner, behind a bunch of spell books. I notice a faint light. It's bright and almost… spellbinding. I climb down the ladder and drag it over to the corner. Shoving a few books back I can see a glowing book. I try to reach for it but my hand is not long enough to reach the very back of the bookcase. It's like my hand is passing through the glowing book, slipping pass the edge of the book and delicately brushing it. I reach further in, my hand running down the spine of the book. I pull out the book from the shelf. It stops glowing and I look at the title.
'Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire' Weird. I've never heard of this before? Is it fiction I wonder? I almost let curiosity get to me. 'Lucy, it's a glowing magical book, like hell you are opening it!'
I climb back down with said book in hand and sit at the table. Why was it glowing? I know some books glow, like the incident back in X784 when Natsu found a weird book and sent us to the past.
Is this different? I have no Idea.