When Dog meets Dawn
By: krystal-kun
Author's Note: None of the naruto characters belong to me (unfortunately ;; ). This is written while the Akatsuki were considering Tobi to join and before Sasori died. So ya…
Inspired by my own dog, Chewy 3
Summary: Did you ever wonder why the Akatsuki don't have any animals? Well there is a very logical explanation. It all started when Tobi, Akatsuki in training, brought home a furry little dog. (Crackfic)
"Awwwwwwwwwwwwww! But look at how cute he is Deidara-sempai!"
The orange masked man held up a ball of dirty gold fur to his sempai's face. Being held up by the 'good boy's hands was a big brown eyed dog with a thick coat of gold fur. It wasn't a puppy, but it wasn't a full-grown dog, it was just in between.
"Hell no. Hmm. " The blonde haired member stated.
Deidara didn't like this idea one bit. However, he knew Tobi was going to ask Leader-sama anyway, regardless of his constant 'no's.
"Besides, do you even know the responsibility it takes for- "
A floppy wet tongue stopped Deidara midsentence and continued its onslaught of licking him, shaggy tail wagging and all.
"Awww! Look sempai! He already likes you!!" Tobi chirped
The blonde shoved the dog away from him and rubbed his now wet face with the sleeve of his jacket.
"I don't care if he likes me or not! We're not keeping it! Hmm!" he shouted.
Tobi slumped, and put the dog to his chest, almost to console it rather than himself.
"Deidara-sempai is just mad. He knows you're not an 'it'." He whispered to the dog, which returned the remark with a lick to his mask. Tobi giggled.
"Tobi! Hurry up already! You know how Sasori-no-danna hates waiting! Hmm!"
"Coming Sempai!"
When the masked man was sure his sempai wasn't looking, he quickly put the dog in his backpack, taking care that it wasn't near some of the exploding tags and other various equipment. He then rushed off to catch up with his sempai.
"You're late"
"I know, I know I'm sorry danna."
The redheaded puppet continued to stare at them with cold, lifeless eyes. The three of them were in a forest clearing, about three miles away from the hideout.
Deidara had been sent on a simple mission, well, as simple as a mission can go for an S-ranked criminal. All he had to do was assassinate a certain feudal lord in the grass country, who had threatened giving away the location of their hideout in exchange for money. As you can imagine, Kakuzu was definitely not pleased. So they had all agreed to simply murder him. Tobi had only come to see how a typical Akatsuki's mission goes, and Deidara had been one of the few who weren't busy.
"Ah! Please don't blame Sempai, Sasori-san. It was Tobi's fault we were so late!"
Sasori shrugged, got up from the rock he had been sitting on for the past two hours and began walking in the direction of the hideout. Deidara wordlessly followed.
As they walked, it was silent, eerily silent. The only thing heard was the occasional crunching of leaves beneath their feet and they walked.
Tobi took this time to take in Sasori's new appearance.
This was the first time Tobi had seen Sasori's real body. The redhead had explained before they left that he only took Hiruko, the puppet he normally hid in, when he was on missions or leaving the river country, where Akatsuki was located. Back then, however Tobi never got a good look at him, as it was dark in the hideout due to a blackout, no thanks to a certain Uchiha Itachi attempting to cook dinner the 'easy way'.
But even as the orange masked man tried to occupy himself with petty observations, the silence still creeped him out.
At this point they were about two miles away from the hideout, then suddenly,
"Bark!"
Sasori jumped and Deidara spun around to face Tobi, who was hushing his backpack.
"What the hell was that?" Sasori said, still shocked from the sudden noise.
"Yes Tobi. What the hell WAS that? Hmm!?" Deidara's voice was growing louder with rage. He knew, but he was desperately hoping it wasn't true.
"A-ah! Umm…. It was a, umm, a………..bird! Yes! It was a bird!" Tobi cried frantically clutching his backpack to himself.
Before Tobi could make up any other excuse, Deidara snatched the backpack and flipped it open, and, unfortunately for Deidara, a floppy eared dog popped up from the backpack.
Sasori's eyes grew wide, the blonde was glaring poison at Tobi, who was rapidly apologizing. As everyone was speechless, save Tobi's apologies, the dog just blankly stared, tongue hanging out, and crumbs all over its face.
Tobi looked up and noticed the crumbs, then snatched back his backpack and looked in.
" He ate my onigiri!" Tobi cried to Deidara.
Deidara just gave him one of his why-on-earth-are-you-such-a-retard looks and put down the dog.
Sasori was still in a state of shock.
Tobi went and picked up the dog and gave it a little 'bad puppy!' talk. The blonde-haired man slung the now lunchless backpack over his shoulder and continued to head back to the hideout.
"I'll explain when we get there. Hmm."
The puppet man finally snapped back to reality, and decided it best to just wait until all the members could hear why a clump of fur was now being clutched to Tobi.
They all walked along silently, Tobi bouncing along with his little furry friend, and soon enough, after 30 muted minutes, they reached the hideout.
"Oi! Kakuzu, why the fuck do we have to all meet here? I was in the middle of a fucking ritual!"
The masked man looked menacingly at his silver-haired partner.
"I heard you the first five times, now shut the hell up." He said, trying to avoid stabbing his partner through the throat. He may not have been able to kill him, but he sure as hell could hurt him.
Hidan grumbled and, after muttering a few curses under his breath, propped himself up against one of the couches, as he was still a little weak from blood loss.
In the room was every member, save the leader who was on his way, and Sasori, Deidara, and Tobi, who were almost there.
Itachi was sitting statue-like on the couch, legs-crossed and hands in his lap. He kept his sharingan deactivated, due to his worsening eyesight. Next to him, his partner Kisame, who was flopped on the couch and nearly asleep from waiting so long. Konan sat quietly in a wooden chair at a small coffee table folding some complex flower out of paper. Hidan was against the couch, and Kakuzu sat in an armchair. Zetsu just stayed half melted into the floor.
The leader, Pein, walked in. All the members immediately straightened up. He stopped in front of everyone, cleared his throat, and announced, " I have received message from Deidara and his group that they will be bringing back a survivor from the attack on the feudal lord. They didn't say anything else, but we will be taking he or she for questioning about any information on the jinchurikii.
They nodded, Konan looked slightly impressed at the fact that someone had actually survived one of the pyromaniac's bombs, and to be unaffected enough to question!
This person must be good, she thought. Possibly Akatsuki material…
Pein took the chair on the other side of the blue-haired kunoichi, who was still absently folding, and sat, hands folded under his pierced chin and waited for the returning group.
Luckily, they didn't have to wait long.
The door burst open with Tobi swinging around some yellow thing. Deidara and Sasori absently walked in. Before Pein could open his mouth, the dog was thrust right in front of his face.
"Can we keep him!?!? Please!!!" Tobi pleaded.
The other members stared, the metal-faced man still trying to take in what on earth just happened. Konan looked amused.
"What the fuck is that?" Hidan stated.
Then it hit her.
"Wait. You don't mean to tell me that that was the survivor. Right?" The origami nin asked.
The others looked shocked, and turned to wait for a reply.
"…………….yes…hmm.." muttered Deidara.
Everyone's eyes went wide, even Itachi showed some, if any, surprise. Pein, on the other hand, was still staring at the large furry mass inches away from his face.
Once again, before the leader could reply, Konan interrupted.
"Sure! Why not?" she smiled.
"WHAT!" Deidara and Hidan screeched in unison.
There was a long silence, waiting for the leader's response.
"……...fine." He stated.
Tobi started jumping around ecstatically swinging the equally excited dog with him. Deidara looked appalled. The rest were mostly impassive, mainly Itachi. Konan was probably the only other one there, save Tobi, who looked rather excited about this.
"Well, we can't just call him 'dog ,' " said Zetsu who was happy Tobi could keep his new friend, but still had a bad feeling about this.
"He has a point." Stated the ever-motionless Uchiha.
Everyone agreed. They pondered a bit about naming the dog, and after a few awkward moments of silence, Hidan spoke up.
"His name will be Jashin!" he said triumphantly.
"No." retorted Kakuzu.
Hidan gave him a dirty look.
" Oh! Tobi knows a good name! We should call him fluffy!" he shouted.
"If the dog is to stay, he should have a more threatening name." Itachi stated. " No one would be afraid of 'Akatsuki and Fluffy.' His name should be Akumu. (Meaning nightmare)
"That's a stupid name." Kisame threw in. " It should be something dog-like. Like 'Fido', or 'Spot' or something.
"How can he be named 'Spot' when he doesn't have a single spot on his body." Sasori commented.
It was true. The dog was a solid yellow.
Arguments continued until Pein finally threw up his hands and yelled, "ENOUGH!"
Silence quickly came over the room as everyone turned to the leader. Even the dog was silent and held its tail between its legs.
"The dog shall be named Dog." He announced.
Silence. Then,
"Dog!?" Hidan said incredulously.
"Yes. Dog." The leader stated.
"Well what in the name of Jashin kind of dumb ass name is that?"
" Do you have a problem with it?" The leader glared at him murderously. Hidan got shivers down his spine, and decided, for one of the few moments of his life, to shut up.
"That's what I thought. You are all dismissed." And with that, he walked out of the room, soon followed by Konan.
Kakuzu grabbed Hidan by the rosary before he could start whining and dragged him out of the room.
Once everyone else had gone, Deidara and Sasori decided to take a rest in the room.
" Well, this should prove interesting." Sasori finally spoke up.
Deidara groaned. Oh ya, I gotta bad feeling about this. He thought.
Well the first chapter of my first story is complete : )
R and R plz!
I hope you all enjoyed! And trust me, the next chapters will be a lot funnier.